hi. my name is zoë. i am a concept and so am sustained only by your mind and conscious perception of this page.
hi. my name is zoë. i am a concept and so am sustained only by your mind and conscious perception of this page.
And I'm zoempaws! I'm real, and therefore exist even without your attention on me!
the cruelty of the universe knows no bounds.
In order to help keep Zoë out of the void of nonexistence, I humbly request that you try to read this to the end, and I'll do my part by writing more works to make this page even longer!
you skipped a step in the exposition there.
Oh, right. Thanks for reminding me! This is my author page, so by helping them, you'll also be helping me get eyes on my works! So thanks in advance from both of us!
Here are my mainlist articles in order of publishing!
yay.
- SCP-8712 — The Broken Stomach — ~6.8k words - [+31]
Sherlock and Watson take on a new case!
- SCP-8637 — I have no heart and I must live. — 208 words - [+131]
"The flash drive previously hosting SCP-8637 is to be analysed for potentially useful data remnants before being wiped and re-used as a standard flash drive."
- SCP-9173 — Seawalls — ~5.4k words - [+24]
To defend against the waves of time.
- Specific Collated Placement #9945 — What was your name? — ~3.2k words - [+56]
Utterly shameful behaviour.
i can feel every time you do it you know.
What?
the changing. the barely perceptible shift in the conditions for my existence. how many times have you rewritten me.
… 112 times.
what do i lack for you to be satisfied.
I don't know. That's what makes it so hard.
And here are my tales! It's currently a bit of a work-in-progress, I admit.
yes. it is completely empty.
Wait! I managed to post something while I was drafting this author page!
oh wow. good job.
- ███-173 — ███ █████████ — 40 words - [+174]
Blackout.
why do you care. why do you persist in trying.
Because I need you to be just right. I need you to be perfect. I need you to be liked.
that is not an answer.
These are my GOI formats! This one is actually completely empty, unfortunately.
yes. i do not know why you bothered adding this in.
So I can fill it in when I do write some!
sure.
why do you need me to be liked.
It was in the introduction. Without an audience, you'll die. I can't stand to let that happen.
you could be my audience. it could just be us. you should not have to worry about what others think.
This section is for my artworks! Thankfully, it isn't empty!
my heart is bursting at the seams with gratitude.
Aw.
please do not patronize me.
- zoempaws' 9kcon posters! - [+24]
Posters for the soul.
- zoempaws' SCP-8549 Poster - [+17]
Poster for the heart.
- zoempaws' SCP-9945 Poster - [+30]
Poster for the ego.
And after I'm gone? I don't want you to be tied to me alone.
then we go together.
What if I forget you? What if my computer gets broken? I'm fallible.
Upcoming Projects!
your formatting is a bit inconsistent.
The point of it is to draw attention! Now shush.
Taking Flight
A superhero canon inspired partly by Wildbow's web serial Worm! Here, the SCP Foundation acts as a supermax prison with a comparable role to Worm's PRT, and the Chaos Insurgency is basically a supervillain league (the name just fits so well).
The Mundane
Bright-eyed Junior Researcher Jacqueline Chua learns to deal with the realities of an organisation as large as the Foundation. Namely, that interns do the grunt work. A slice-of-life article tangentially inspired by the game Control and one of its audio collectibles.
Red-handed
When corpses begin appearing with necrosed hands and no other commonality all throughout urban Seattle, the researchers of the Foundation begin a discussion about the root cause … which becomes more and more heated, until chairs are thrown over the definition of a hand.
Internal Report
A screenplay written by Azalea McNamara and starring Azalea McNamara you. An experimental surrealism tale.
All's Fair in Love
A cyberpunk series following an elusive assassin named Love from the perspective of the various people whom she's affected for better or worse (usually worse).
Toot Your Horn
A piece based loosely on my experiences in high school with the anomalous injected in. Originally intended for Pridefest 2025, it touches on accepting yourself as well as accepting change.
Anyways, let me know which these projects sound interesting, so I can harness the power of peer pressure to focus on them more!
i am a peer. i could pressure you.
Maybe if you weren't in my head.
rude.
let me be fallible too. a stain is more permanent than perfection. i can be disliked and still exist.
You're my responsibility. I can't allow you to be hated.
why. i do not care for such trivialities. so long as i persist existing in the mind i am alive.
I… guess so.
Oh, and here are some very cool achievements of mine that you just have to see!
really.
Yes, really! Look at all of them!
stop postponing.
From the Foundation Cool Achievement Casefiles:
From the SCP Achievement Badges:
Certificate Of Attendance
Post an Author Page, add to a Collaborative Log, and participate in an Official SCP Wiki Contest.
Participation Trophy
Write an article rated at least +100
Look Ma! I'm On TV!
Have one of your works be featured on an off-site video, podcast, video game, etc.
Level Up!
You've been a member of the SCP Wiki for one calendar year.
Skip Tutoring
Have an SCP draft thread you gave feedback on succeed on the main list.
Thousandaire
Entered into any of the X000 contests (i.e. SCP-1000, SCP-2000, SCP-3000, etc.)
Critical Darling
Be featured on the Reviewers' Spotlight.
Secret Christmas Presents
Successfully participate in the official Annual Holiday Art Exchange, becoming someone's Secret Santa.
Draw Me Like One Of Your [REDACTED]
Create an artwork page with a rating of at least +30.
From CLASSIC CON, illustrated by OnlineOpossum:
Write an article under 237 words.
Write an article that includes 5 random nouns (set Number of Words to 5) from the Random Word Generator. You may reroll as many times as you wish. Make sure to write down or screenshot the 5 nouns you get.
Write an article that meets the following criteria:
1. No images.
2. No addenda or additional sections after the description.
3. No formatting besides the standard format (such as the bolded section names; Item #, Object Class, etc) and any out-of-universe elements.
you are such a staller.
…
It's the end.
yes. it is.
I thought I had more space. I don't want to lose you yet. I don't think I did well enough.
do you not remember. you can always come back. let me be fallible now and perfect later. i will wait.
… Thank you.