"It's been longer than that, and I'm not leaving any time soon. This is the best job a girl could ask for."

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Please join me in congratulating the 105th recipient of the Centre's Superb Pugilist Commendation, Iris Thompson, Doctor Phugnae, also known as "Agent 105" to most of us.

Really, we would have given this to her sooner, but she insisted on being the 105th recipient. (See Repetition and Rhythm in Pugilism and Mathematics, Centre Journal for Combat Mathematics, Issue 31)

— Dr. August Solstice, Boxercrat, CICAPOCO

Hi everyone,

I'm so honored that the Centre's recognized me with a Superb Pugilist Commendation! It seems that just yesterday I was formally joining the Centre straight out of high school, and every day since then has been an adventure. I never expected that I would make it so far.

And as is expected of me, here's the wisdom I've gathered over the course of my career.

— Dr. Iris Thompson

How I Joined the Centre:

I was 15 years old, worrying about school, boys, college, doubting I could make it as a "real" photographer, and sometimes thinking that the photographs I took didn't look quite how I'd remembered. Your standard teenage fare.

Then, one day, my life was turned upside down when I saw my boyfriend having a heart attack from seeing the "Left Sh*rk" meme through a photograph I'd taken of him.

I tried to be a good Samaritan and call the cops to help him, but they got suspicious until I showed them my Deviation.

After that, the Centre snapped me up.

Early Career:

I wrote most of the following proposal myself, if you can't tell! It's always so embarrassing reading your teenage writing, but I still have a soft spot for it.

(CICAPOCO's let me keep this number ever since. It's kind of my lucky charm.)


Project IMAGO GREEN is ARCHIVED. Please refer to current SPC documentation for this number. The original CICAPOCO notice for SPC-105 is preserved below.


Project IMAGO GREEN is ACTIVE. For Specific Personnel Combat deployments please contact CICAPOCO.

Please note Agent IMAGO GREEN is still protected under international laws pertaining to the deployment of child soldiers.

—Nathan Jones, CICAPOCO


IMAGO GREEN's original camera, now replaced.

Project #: SPC-105

Selachian Pugnātorial Capabilities: Upon completion, Agent IMAGO GREEN will have pugnatorial coverage on the majority of Selachian entities on the planet Earth.

Specialized Project Component(s): SPC-105 consists of Centre recruit Iris Thompson, a human with a GREEN-spectra Deviation, codenamed IMAGO GREEN. IMAGO GREEN's Deviation allows her to view and manipulate the subjects within photographs that she has taken. IMAGO GREEN must use her own camera to take these photographs.

Augmentation Summary: To surpass her limitations, Thompson has requested the best current commercially available photographic technology1, regular full-expenses-paid trips to known locations adjacent to Selachian native habitats2, and a fully-funded world-class photography degree from Yale University3.

Deployment Record: [EXPUNGED, BY ORDER OF ME.]

We are not going over my deployment records as a kid. It's… embarrassing. OCEANS SEVEN is not a time I look upon fondly, even if I did meet some very dear friends and colleagues.

The Centre recruited me to punch photos of selachian entities — or, rather, punch selachian entities through photos — but there were some limitations I had to work through. My Deviation was much weaker when I was a kid, and it took me a lot of practice get where I am now.

I had misgivings at first. There were a lot of perks, but when I was younger I didn't believe in the mission. I was opportunistic. I got free flights to every beach on Earth. I got to work on my tan and see some of the most beautiful places in the world—but those memories are always tainted by what I now know lurks beneath the waves.

The Centre also paid for my college, which doesn't mean much if you're a new recruit, but back before the Centre eliminated global capitalism in order to eradicate loan sharks and the so-called "Shark Tank", college was exorbitantly expensive in the Union of American States. People would go deep into debt to parasites like the Neo-Sharkics and Percival Shark.

I was getting a good deal, and all the Centre asked in exchange was a decade of my life. Back then, I thought it was a steep cost for a foolish mission, trading one master for another.

But I quickly found my footing. When I learned the horrible truth about our world, of the literal and metaphorical selachians that deserved punching… that was the moment that defined everything that followed.

After the Impasse, where we chose not to lower our fists, after the Liberated Cetacean Union spread through the seas, giving us a real fighting chance against the Sharkics on their own home territory, after we solidified our alliance with Inner Australia… we escalated. The Centre realized that one day soon, the future would look like selachians being punched in the face forever, and it knew it had to dream bigger. And I was there, leading the transformation.

It's been longer than that, and I'm not leaving any time soon. This is the best job a girl could ask for.

Specific Pugilist Capabilities:

These resumé formats are tiresome, but the Centre enhances its bureaucratic potency by using as many initialisms of SPC as possible.

The Limitations of my Deviation:

I am significantly weaker when I work with pictures I didn't take with my camera. I used to think it was limited to this one camera I bought back when I was a kid, but as it turns out, it has to be my camera. Our scientists think it's a mental block, but even so, it's not one I'll ever fully overcome. We spent a good three years trying to extend my ability to work with other peoples' photos, and it never got easier.

But there's an easy workaround.

It just has to be my camera and my photos. If it's legally mine, then there's nothing stopping me from thinking of it as fully mine, no lingering reasons for me to doubt myself. And if it's mine, my power works at its full efficiency.

Other skills:

  • Martial Arts (various)
  • Astrophotography
  • Wildlife Photography
  • Orbital Physics
  • Public Speaking
  • Software Engineering
  • Graphic Design
  • Swimming
  • Deep Sea Diving
  • People Management

Solo Pugiliations & Career:

I formally joined the Centre when I was 18, fresh out of high school, though I'd spent the two summers previous helping with their operations beforehand. Since then, I've been responsible for over 20 solo pugnatory expeditions, though these days I serve in more of an intelligence and support role. I served as a Centre agent while finishing my photography degree.

I was a member of the OCEANS SEVEN team for the two years before I entered college, but I chose to transfer to a solo role, citing personal disagreements with my field commander. I still consider Abe a valuable asset and colleague, but he and I were not a good fit for the same team.

After that, I transferred to remote pugilation. Since my talents are unique, I have developed projects to enhance the scope and reach of my abilities to aide the Centre's mission, as well as leading organizational transformations.

My other accomplishments:

  • 8-time first-place winner of the Planet Geographica Photo Contest
  • Punched the Oceanic Ambassador of the Sharkics in the Face (from a distance) while It was Giving a Speech to the Global Organization of Countries
  • Winner of 2015 Centre Associate Triathlon

Selected Projects, Current:

My latest lecture series: "So Your Mirror Universe Self is a Shark-Lover" (this was cathartic for me to write and give — you can find recordings here, so I won't repeat myself much.)

An excerpt:

So you've learned that your mirror universe self is a shark-lover. Yeah, I hear you gasping. You're shocked that I'm willing to say the word, and give them power. But that's the thing. In that mirror universe, the person wearing your face, responding to your name, living with your Deviations– they won't just say the word. They'll embrace it. They'll say, without a hint of irony, "I love sharks."

(Here, I usually pause for gasps. This point cannot be made with weaker language.)

So what do you do?

Raise your fist and thump your chest—because they are not you.

Each and every one of us wakes up with a choice, every single day. We can choose to succumb to this world that we live in, cower in fear of the Mistaken Beast – or we can rise to the challenge. We can stare the Mistaken Beast in its typographic little eyes and say, "You're not making me do this – I choose to do this."

They don't have to make that choice. They've never had to make that choice. But us? We make that choice, as hard as it is, every single day.

You are stronger than your dark reflections.

Finally, my current project. This is probably what you really came here for: a look into the thought-processes that've made me so successful


All WORLD IRIS intelligence requests may be forwarded to Agent IMAGO GREEN.

All Specific Pugilation Candidates should be directed through CICAPOCO.

IMAGO GREEN has total discretion over the deployment of WORLD IRIS.


Selachian Pugnātorial Capabilities

Using Network WORLD IRIS, IMAGO GREEN has full real-time coverage of all outdoor spaces on the planet Earth. Via application of her Deviation, IMAGO GREEN is capable of both tactical pugilism of strategic pugilism candidates and collecting large-scale long range tactical intelligence.

The ocean covers over 70% of Earth's surface during a dry season. We have reasonably good coverage of dry land, but traversing the oceans is treacherous even for our most seasoned Marine Fighting Teams.

That's where I come in.

Specific Project Components

SPC-105 consists of the WORLD IRIS mass surveillance network, its operators, and its outputs. The only viable operator of WORLD IRIS is Centre Director Iris Thompson, codenamed IMAGO GREEN. The Centre Remote Observation Management system (CROM) will be responsible for managing the data throughput of WORLD IRIS. Finally, the Thompson Gallery of Photography will be open to all Centre operatives who wish to gain greater insights on IMAGO GREEN's capabilities or study intelligence obtained through SPC-105.

The WORLD IRIS mass surveillance network consists of multiple components.

Just a summary. Feel free to shoot me an email if you have a custom request that CICAPOCO can't handle!


Component SKY EYE is a network of 36,000 satellites in geocentric orbit, each equipped with an orbital camera capable of one trillion times magnification. Furthermore, SKY EYE cameras have been enhanced with VISIO ABYSS Deviant technology to allow perfect vision through liquid water and most forms of organic matter. These cameras are capable of complete and total visual coverage of all terrestrial flat spaces at any given time.

Before the development of SKY EYE, our knowledge of the Sharkic Empires was shaky. I spent half a decade helping map the full extent of Sharkic submarine holdings, but it was always Sisyphean because of the ever-changing seascape, even with the best patrol ships and camera technology.

There was no way of knowing whether a settlement was built into the seafloor, or whether it was actually a Sharkic Crab City that could detach and relocate at any given moment. And that's just the Sharkics. Even the mind of a non-Deviant Selachian Entity is utterly alien to a human's.

Selachian entities live in a three-dimensional world. From the moment they tear free from their egg sacs, they are oriented for three axes. We humans essentially live on a flat plane. We need stairs or ladders to go up or down. But Selachians? They aren't bound by gravity. In their home turf, they can come from above… or from below.

SKY EYE changes that. We have full 24/7 real-time coverage of every nook and cranny of the oceans, from the Mediterranean to the Mariana. No Sharkic mobilization will go unnoticed. No Selachian motion will be unexpected.

To provide coverage in indoor settings, the WORLD IRIS system incorporates all camera technology produced in the last ten years and all cameras produced globally for the foreseeable future. By incorporating auto-shutter capabilities and exploiting software backdoors in Closed Circuit Camera systems, mobile phone cameras, and laptop cameras, WORLD IRIS grants IMAGO GREEN pugilative coverage against most indoor settings with modern technology.

The Centre has prioritized replacing camera systems in embassies and seats of government, as these are locations most often visited by prominent Sharkic emissaries.

This coverage is detailed enough for IMAGO GREEN to perform pugilative action against almost any selachian entity upon the planet Earth.

The proudest moment of my career will always be the time I punched the Oceanic Ambassador in the face.

Imagine, if you will, the current Oceanic Ambassador: six feet tall, a broad chest, a winning smile – but when you look at all closely, you see the ridges on his back, the roughness of his skin, the points of his teeth, and you realize that he is a Shark (It's my Superb Pugilist Commendation, I get to say what I want) wearing the form of a man.

Imagine, furthermore, ambassadors from every nation, sitting in rapt fear as the Oceanic Ambassador gives a speech in the Assembly Hall of the Global Organization of Countries, threatening them in one breath, wooing them in another, to some malefic end like giving more land to the sea, his voice like waves in a storm.

Imagine these esteemed men and women, representatives of their nations on the world stage, clutching at their hearts and wiping their brows in terror. Imagine them crying and fainting as the Ambassador tells them in grisly detail what they will do to the world's shorelines if his demands are not met. Imagine them about to capitulate to the Ambassador's demands.

And then imagine a punch.

Not so scary now, is it?

All of these cameras are the legal property of Iris Thompson. The legal ownership of all modern camera intellectual property, both extant and in development, is to be given to Iris Thompson.

Since I own the cameras, I can reach through them.

And I can punch.


The CENTRE REMOTE OBSERVATION MANAGEMENT system transforms the vast amount of data collected by WORLD IRIS into human-readable form. CROM is capable of discerning the presence of selachian entities within visual data collected by WORLD IRIS, as well as estimating the status and strategic significance of pugilating of these entities. CROM is capable of indexing and searching the visual data collected by WORLD IRIS according to parameters specified by the user.

Furthermore, CROM is capable of advanced photomanipulation techniques, enabling users to modify the aesthetics and composition of any photographs captured and collected.

Iris Thompson holds sole access rights and software ownership of CROM.

There are, at my best estimates, over a million cameras taking constant real-time rapid-fire photographs of nearly every space in the world. I'm no slouch, but even I'm not smart enough to sort through all that on my own.

The Centre Remote Observation Management system handles that for me. It tracks the approximate location of every Selachian entity and estimates a threat rating so I can determine a proper course of action.

Unfortunately, I have to be the owner of CROM's software rights. If someone alters a photograph I take, my Deviation becomes significantly weaker. It's part of the mental block. But if CROM does it, even automatically, and I own CROM – in other words, if CROM is technically "my camera" – then I stay at full power.

Nothing can hide from me.

The Thompson Gallery of Photography:

The Thompson Gallery of Photography contains Iris Thompson's portfolio of photography, much of which has been recognized and renowned worldwide. The Thompson Gallery of Photography is open to all members of the Centre. It contains several permanent exhibits, such as the Thompson Collection of Portraits of Prominent Sharkic Cultists, the Thompson Collection of Benthic Landscapes, and the Thompson Collection of Wild Selachians. Centre members are encouraged to study the permanent exhibits in order to develop a better understanding of Selachian threats.

The Thompson Gallery of Photography also features an annually rotating collection of photographs. The current year's exhibition is "An Exploration Through Sunken Adytum: By Iris Thompson."

All photographs within are the legal property of Iris Thompson.


A Sharkic. I punched him good.

Please come see my photographs. I'm very proud of them. They look much better in a gallery than as part of required training.


IMAGO GREEN is Iris Thompson. IMAGO GREEN is the sole individual with the Deviation and legal right to effectively use the WORLD IRIS system.

IMAGO GREEN is a crucial part of modern Centre infrastructure.

IMAGO GREEN cannot be replaced.

IMAGO GREEN is to be given priority access to Deviant Substance ELIXIR GOLD.

IMAGO GREEN must be kept alive and comfortable at all costs, as no attempts to replicate her Deviation artificially have been successful.

All such attempts are to be TERMINATED.

This is the best life a girl could ask for.

I'm not leaving any time soon.

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