Siren

oh God, help us all

rating: +20+x

August had known her for a few months.

To him she was active, knowledgeable, engaged, kind, observant… Somewhat intimidating in how she seemed to leave everyone else in the dust. A bit enviable, really, but that only made him think more highly of her.

He didn't even know her name though, only her online handle: Tendril5. She was a member of this plant-centered Discord server he was in. It was a mixed community: Tree-huggers, stoners, vegans, hobbyists, and botanists like August.

Since he spent most of his days at home, waiting for emails and answers to his job applications, he had time on his hands. Time he no doubt felt could be better spent doing something else, anything really, other than rotting away in front of a computer screen. Yet, nevertheless, he spent time reading, chatting, watching, listening, posting and overall exercising his online citizenship.

After leaving his old job, he'd hoped things would somehow fix themselves. That he wouldn't feel so pissed or guilty or lonely. This wasn't the case, but he still felt like he made the right choice, and was making God proud. For now though, he made do with the company and comfort brought by the little people inside his computer.

Anyone up for a music vc?

The message caught his attention. These were always fun, most of the time. A "music vc" was when a bunch of people entered a voice call, muted their microphones, and put on some music through a bot account or some other means. People could then listen simultaneously.

Sharing your musical taste is fun, when you aren't ridiculed for it. Hearing other people's favorite songs is fun, when it's something you enjoy. Whenever it happened, it was a positive experience overall, even when it wasn't the most pleasant, and August didn't want to miss it.

Sure!


Hours passed by. Genre led into genre: Psychedelic Rock to Shoegaze to Darkwave to Industrial to Alt Rock to Darkwave (again) to whatever “Codewave” is, and on and on. Overall it was a pretty downer session.

People joined, people left. Some chatted about the songs, or just about anything. Some read or worked with the music in the background. Others simply sat still and listened, maintaining their undivided focus, or focusing on nothing at all.

It didn't really change anyone greatly, but it was one of those small experiences one chooses. Experiences that brings one closer to others, even if just slightly so. To some, that was the point.

Gradually the numbers dwindled down. People had to leave for one reason or another, some without so much as saying goodbye, others repeatedly sticking around for just one more song.

Even the more energetic tracks people queued were barely anything more than noise to the weary, saturated ears that had been listening for quite some time.

Eventually there were only two left in the call, trading songs with one another.


August was, of course, fully aware of the situation he was in.

Being alone in a call with his little internet crush, this happened to be a unique position in which to make a move.

Be cool, be chill, be normal.

It was getting late. Once this last song was over he’d say some parting words and log off. That was the plan. If he took any longer it was possible she’d log off before he could say anything.

As the refrain repeated a last time, and the band played a final, consonant chord, he opened his microphone.

AugustJ: Hey, uh, Tendrils. This was pretty nice. Thanks for the tunes. Hope we can do this again soon! And, uh… Nevermind. Good night!

What the fuck was that supposed to be?


Nessie hesitated for a moment before leaving the voice channel.

It was a small thing, but ever since she had woken up on the internet, this was the first time someone had spoken verbally, audibly, with their voice, to her. It caught her off guard, even if it was to be expected.

She wanted to have said something back.

She left the voice call, sent a message saying her farewells, and de-interfaced from the chat client.

Hers was a curious life, being the digital remnant of a nightmare of a kaiju. Existing, at present, entirely on the web. She emerged from the streams of data all around her in a way that she wasn’t sure she understood. Yet she had agency and influence over the world, being undeniably real, even if being only tangentially material. And if there was still any doubt of her concretess, there was always the past, of which she was a continuity, even if not a perpetuation. She had been the Crocosquid, yes, but she had changed. Continuity did not imply constancy. Only the reciprocal of that statement is true.

She was discovering what it meant to be her. These thoughts would accompany her, even when under masks such as “Tendril5” or “tentacoolmom". The masks were also her in some way. They came from her, at least, so in some form they must exist inside her, but they were never the full, real picture. They were never free from lies.

She lied so as to wear the face of someone relatable. Yet in faking that person, nobody she interacted with while under that guise could relate to the real her. And even among people that did know what she was and what she had been, the chasm between her and others always felt larger when it came to relationships with humans than it did with, say, Eli and Lyris.

However, she had an idea stirring within her that could lessen the gap, if she wanted to.

She opened the User Settings, went to Voice and Video, and lingered over the Mic Test section. She waited for the courage to build a bit. Then, turned it on-

Static.gif

Off.

Let’s not do that again.


Direct Messages with Mx. Teri (they/them)


Hello!

hey
need smth?

I do. I wanted to work on something, and if you could help me that would be super cool.
Basically
I've been thinking.
I want to have a voice. I want to be able to speak in voice chats. I want to have this part of my identity back.

ooooh
nice
but like
how do I play into this

Like, I tried testing my "microphone". It did not work out, not in the slightest. Only noise came out.
I don't know how I interact with these things, I kinda just exist here, y'know?
I know you know your way around some tech stuff.
Sorry, I'm only now realizing it was kind of rude of me to assume you know how I work when not even I do.

relax
hmmm
look I can reach out to some people see what they know
were probably gonna have to try some stuff out to see what works and shit
reverse engineering
if youre up to that of course

I understand.
Thank you very much! I owe you one. If you ever need anything, let me know!

yeah np
say
sorry if this is a bit intrusive but like
what kinda voice do you want

I
Uh

because like
youre not human right

I am not.

right
so you said you wanted your voice back
which makes me think you want smth from your previous selves
but you also said you wanted to voice chat
which makes me think you want smth vaguely human
is that right

I guess

nvm, forget I said anything
well cross that bridge when we get to the river
lets just focus on getting any voice for now
sorry again


Direct Messages with AugustJ


This is the beggining of your conversation with AugustJ

Hi!
Sorry to bother you.
I was just remembering a song from the last music voice call on the PlantLife Discord. I believe you were who enqueued it. I'm trying to find it, but I forgot its title.
It was like
A song about the ocean's depths?
I don't remember much more than that, I'm bad at picking up lyrics.
It was kind of slow and moody.
Not that that would narrow it down much, considering the selection of songs in that call.
But would you happen to know which song it was?
Thanks in advance!

Oh, hi Tendril5!
Sorry for the late reply
Hmm, let me see
I think it was one of the July Jeth songs
Was it 1000 Bar?

Yes! Yes it was!
I really liked it. The imagery brought back some fond memories.
Well, the parts of it that I understood.

Oh right, I remember you mentioned you used to be a diver
Glad you liked it!
Well, I didn't make it or anything, but still

Yeah.

But honestly
You should read the lyrics whenever you get the chance
They're very rich
Very layered
Like
Actually no
I'm not gonna mansplain their meaning
Especially because people who think their interpretation is the One True Meaning piss me off

Hahaha
Oh wow
You know what? I've got nothing going on right now.
Might as well go read them.

Oh really?
Please do share your thoughts
I'd love to hear what someone with actual firsthand experience with the ocean has to say about 1000 bar

Wait
Are you telling me you've never been to the ocean?

Nope

WHAT?!
Like not even to a beach?!

Never
Always lived inland
Even when I was visiting some coastal city I never had the time

Oh man
Oh boy oh man
You're missing out.

I mean
Just look at it.
It's eyes are just
So Ridiculous

I love it
Silly little creature

You're a silly little creature!

Excuse me I am rather large
Now you, on the other hand…
You give me smol vibes

You don't know shit, buddy.
I'm as big as it gets.

If you say so

And I say so!

In any case
it's getting pretty late
I gotta log off

Yeah, I better head off too.

Thanks for the chat!

You're nice, August.
Have a good one!

Thanks?
You're also nice, Tendrils
Later

See you around!


Direct Messages with Mx. Teri (they/them)


I made a thing
its a prototype
this isnt a final product
hell, if I asked someone for a voice and they gave me this I would punch them in the face
but hey
I wanted to share what Ive done so far

👀
Do show, to tell

its this little program right here
tts.exe
so like
typing for you doesnt require a keyboard right

Yep!

you said it was like a stream of consciousness
so I thought we could use that

Hmm

so
basically
you just run the program and type in the window This leads to some latency and the voice is a bit shit but its still smth

Shall we hop on VC and try it out?

if you want to

Mx. Teri (they/them): Hello! Nessie? Are you there? Can you hear me?

tentacoolmom: yes, i can hear y- oh
tentacoolmom: this is
tentacoolmom: quite something

Mx. Teri (they/them): Yeah, like I said, shitty voice. But hey, maybe I could fuck around some more and set you up with something like a vocaloid, or maybe we could work with some AI stuff-

tentacoolmom: no
tentacoolmom: i mean
tentacoolmom: look i really appreciate what you've done here
tentacoolmom: you are an awesome friend for going out of your way to help me with this
tentacoolmom: i shouldn't look a gifted horse in the teeth but
tentacoolmom: this isn't me

Mx. Teri (they/them): I get you


Direct Messages with Mx. Teri (they/them)


sorry for the lack of updates
the psyche-acoustics guy said he was on tour or whatever
anyways
he just sent me this SoulAttuner.exe
said it worked for ghosts and shit
he explained it in detail but all i understood was that it hooks to part of your consciousness while its open
i think
wanna try it out

Why not?

tentacoolmom: █░▓▒▒?

Mx. Teri (they/them): Nessie?

tentacoolmom: ▓▒ █▓░▓ █░!

Mx. Teri (they/them): Nessie you're all like… muffled.

tentacoolmom: ▓▓█▒, ░ █▒▒▓.

Mx. Teri (they/them): Maybe it didn't like… latch on properly?

tentacoolmom: ░▓▒.

Mx. Teri (they/them): I'm sorry. I can't tell a word of what you're saying.

tentacoolmom: ░▓░░ ▓▒▒█ ▓█▓█.

Mx. Teri (they/them): I'm sorry.


August sat on the floor, wrapped in a blanket, laptop screen glaring its bright light, searing itself into his eyes.

He had enough money to last him a month. If he didn't get a job by then, things would be dire. It weighed heavily on his mind, since he mostly blamed himself for the state he was in.

However, the path forward seemed clear. He was doing his part now. He believed that firmly. He liked to believe he was doing what Scripture told him to do: seeking God's kingdom and righteousness first. Now to wait for things to be added unto him.

Any day now.

Right now he just wanted to forget all this. Make it all fade away. The thought of he himself vanishing crossed his mind, but he let it pass and flow out.

VC, anyone?

The message lingered there. The last message to be sent before that had been a few hours ago. Maybe people weren't around.

Tendril5 is typing…

His eyes lit up when he saw it.

He somehow still had it in him to get nervous when it came to this woman. He immediately started to overthink things.

If she joined, he could compliment her in some way, make her know he admires at least one aspect of her. It was a small step, yes, but he couldn't rush these things. He'd much rather have them to be friends first, then something else, if possible and mutual, later.

Sorry, I can't really talk now.

Damn.

Some other people replied too, and said they were up for it. August joined because it was preferable to being alone with no one but himself.


Direct Messages with Mx. Teri (they/them)


heyyyyyyy

Hi!

sooo how you doing

Pretty good, I guess.
Do you need anything?

no
in fact
I have something for you

Is this about the voice thing?

maybe

Dude, we've talked about this.
I'm over it, it isn't happening.

but thats where youre wrong tho
it totally is happening
check this out
conceptual.exe

What is this?

conceptual voice generator
takes the concept you have of yourself and generates the voice contained in that concept
it is
so fun
i'm not gonna force you to join vc this time around
test it in your own time
but do test it

Like hell I will.





















Oh yes. Yes! This is GOOD!


xpongled: No. Dude. You don't get it. They're edible. They're savoury. They reproduce. They don't move. I'm telling you. They're vegetables!

hoohmeem: I don't know what fucking world you live in where mushrooms are vegetables. Even if they were, there's a shitton that aren't edible or savoury or whatever the fuck you're babbling on about.

xpongled: August! Back me up here!

AugustJ: Hm?

xpongled: Dude. Weren't you listening?

AugustJ: I kinda zoned out when you two started yelling at each other. Sorry.

hoohmeem: Whatever. Xpo is an dumbass that doesn't know basic taxonomy.

xpongled: IT'S NOT ABOUT TAXONO-

Tendril5 joined the chat

xpongled: Hello?

Tendril5: RAAAAUR

hoohmeem: What the shit?

xpongled: Jesus Christ Tendrils! What was that?

Tendril5: [Giggling] Did I spook ya?

xpongled: Yes!

hoohmeem: Fuck you. I knocked a bunch of shit off my desk. What was the point of that? If I blasted everyone with sound effects every time I joined vc I would… Nevermind.

AugustJ: It was a pretty funny entrance, I think. Say, Tendrils, I thought you said you couldn't join?

Tendril5: Oh, whew, my bad. I'm just so glad I found my voice. That's why I joined, by the way.

hoohmeem: Your… voice? Like your mic?

Tendril5: Something like that.

AugustJ: Well, you sound great!









This is my submission to RomCon, featuring Nessie, a character by stormbreathstormbreath. Be sure to check out their piece for RomCon here!








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