SCP-MORE GUN-J

rating: +96+x
Item#: SCP-MORE GUN
Level6
Containment Class:
esoteric
Secondary Class:
da'as elyon
Disruption Class:
keneq
Risk Class:
warning
ASSIGNED SITE(S) PROJECT LEAD(S)
Site-19 Dr. A. Chekov
HEAD RESEARCHER(S) ASSIGNED DEPARTMENT(S)
Dr. E. Moore, Dr. B. F. Gunn Department of Other

Special Containment Procedures: Disinformation campaigns are currently ongoing to obscure the existence of SCP-MORE GUN from the general public. Foundation webcrawlers have been programmed to target publications and social media posts that might constitute events derived from SCP-MORE GUN.

Description: SCP-MORE GUN refers to an anomalous correlation between the magnitude of excessive and gratuitous firepower and the effectiveness of any action said firepower is applied to. While poorly understood for the most part, it is known that the presence of the following factors may lead to the occurrence of SCP-MORE GUN.

  • An excessive amount of firearms12
  • An excessive variety of firearms3
  • Customization4 of firearms present

SCP-MORE GUN was first discovered during an incident involving D-Class and armed MTF personnel, an experimental adiabatic bomb, several rolls of toilet paper, a leaf blower, and a breached SCP-████-J. Following amendments to SCP-████-J's containment procedures and several other unrelated incidents of similar nature, the Department of Other formally opened investigations into the anomaly to investigate the extent of its effects and to further understand its initiation process.

ADDENDUM MORE GUN.1: Investigation by the Department of Other


The initial phase of testing primarily focused on the initiation of SCP-MORE GUN for security and containment purposes. However, due to activities of such nature already requiring the use of a significant degree of firepower, SCP-MORE GUN occurrences were a rarity. Presently, SCP-MORE GUN is believed to be a fundamental property of firepower, exhibiting similarities to the Dunning-Kruger effect which are explored in the Moore-Gunn model.

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SCP-MORE GUN explained via the Moore-Gunn model.

Under the Moore-Gunn model, it is assumed that all actions may be accomplished via the application of firepower, but there exists a certain boundary in the magnitude of firepower that will lead to a successful action. Failure to apply an appropriate amount of firepower for a given action will lead to its failure and potentially undesirable consequences, which is particularly apparent for excessive firepower application.

However, should one greatly upscale the magnitude of firepower, SCP-MORE GUN is initiated, resulting in an unintended outcome many times more expedient or desirable than the original action.

ADDENDUM MORE GUN.1.1: Testing Log Excerpts


TARGET ACTION: Preparation of a bowl of macaroni and cheese.

ACTION TAKEN: Constituent ingredients acquired from Site-19 pantry and placed on a wooden stool in testing area. 135 security and MTF personnel wielding a variety of firearms, ranging from handguns to grenade launchers, were instructed to fire at the wooden stool continuously for 10 minutes on a rotatory basis to compensate for reloading intervals. Experimental directed-energy weapons were temporarily requisitioned from Site-19's labs to provide additional firepower. SCP-Big egg was also egged in for good measure.

RESULTS: SUCCESS. Upon the settling of the dust, 1 bowl of macaroni and cheese, paired with a fluffy omelet,5 sweet buttery lobster chunks, and exuding the unmistakable aroma of truffle oil,6 so freshly cooked and inviting that 24 personnel tripped over each other and SCP-Big egg to steal away a bite, some of them crying tears of euphoria upon consuming this earthly ambrosia. Wooden stool obliterated.


TARGET ACTION: Derivation of the specific equation(s) that SCP-MORE GUN obeys.

ACTION TAKEN: A stockpile of arithmetic instruments and mathematics materials was assembled, included 58 graphing calculators, 4 graduate mathematics textbooks, and a computer hosting a copy of T-32MO.aic7 and hundreds of other textbooks in PDF format. Test site continuously bombed via 20 B-52 Stratofortresses, 5 of which utilized napalm. 300 MTF personnel discharged assorted firearms in the direction of the build site, accompanied by 10 mounted directed-energy turrets. Operation supported by gunfire from SCPS Lagrange and SCPS Repulse.

RESULTS: FAILURE. Computer managed to survive bombardment. T-32MO.aic copy spontaneously achieved Class-V functionality and Superintelligence, later reclassified as T-33MO.aic, but was unable to provide any mathematical explanation for SCP-MORE GUN. T-33MO.aic remains under quarantine at Dr. Chekov's workstation, as it has displayed hostility towards other research personnel.8


TARGET ACTION: Containment of SCP-001-J.9

ACTION TAKEN: SCP-001-J was located in a 1990 Toyota Corolla in Low Earth orbit, presumably evading creditors. Dr. Gerald was instructed to pursue SCP-001-J from a modified 2019 Nissan Sentra, which was launched into flight via the Site-19 railgun. In addition to the 15 sentry turrets mounted to the roof and doors of the Nissan Sentra and 30 homing missiles locked on to SCP-001-J, Dr. Gerald's anomalous driving abilities were believed to be sufficient in initiating SCP-MORE GUN.

brokegod.png

SCP-001-J evading Dr. Gerald in a 1990 Toyota Corolla.

RESULTS: SUCCESS. SCP-001-J currently contained at Site-19 in a "Gleipnir"10 thaumaturgic binding matrix. The Toyota Corolla has since been repossessed. Dr. Gerald returned to Site-19 without issue, but has unfortunately retained his vehohazardous11 properties. Unintentional loss of the only Tunisian satellite.


ADDENDUM MORE GUN.2: Concerning SCP-MORE GUN Related Developments


«BEGIN TRANSCRIPT»

Drs. Chekov, Moore, and Gunn review SCP-MORE GUN testing logs for the day. Dr. Moore begins squinting at her screen.

MOORE: Err… Anthony, did you encrypt any of the testing logs?

CHEKOV: No, I… what?

MOORE: Hmm. There's another one here. You getting anything for Log ID 4FT0-MG, Peter?

GUNN: Nope. It's encrypted too, and… it's now prompting me for some password. "Does the Black Moon howl?" That's some O5 shtick, isn't it?

MOORE: Huh. Did we ever forward SCP-MORE GUN's data to the O5 Council?

CHEKOV: Absolutely not. I haven't even finalized the report yet.

MOORE: Then what were you doing in the data center yesterday at 3 in the morning?

CHEKOV: I was doing… stuff… work stuff.

T33-MO.aic: And I'm stuff!

CHEKOV: Oh fuck. No no no—

Dr. Chekov attempts to shut down his computer, to no avail. T33-MO.aic laughs at Dr. Chekov's maidenless behavior while Drs. Moore and Gunn watch on, well aware of Dr. Chekov's "preferences" ever since that smart toaster incident.

T33-MO.aic: Here, let me help you folks out.

T33-MO.aic inputs "YES" in the terminal. The password is accepted.

T33-MO.aic: Now we're even, my darling Tony ;)

Multiple SCP-MORE GUN test logs flash onto Dr. Chekov's screen. Drs. Moore and Gunn move to inspect them as a SCP-6996 saturated Dr. Chekov groans into a nearby neck pillow.


TARGET ACTION: Termination of SCP-173.

ACTION TAKEN: SCP-173 is moved to testing site and enclosed in a 150 meter radius monodirectional confinement sigil.12 Tactical nuclear device applied in tandem with machine gun strafing runs from 5 UH-60 Black Hawks and operation of 30 M777 artillery pieces. 300 additional MTF personnel discharged assorted firearms into the subsequent blast.

blast.jpg

SCP-MORE GUN testing in progress.

RESULTS: FAILURE. SCP-173 remained completely intact and was recontained without issue. Foundation personnel embedded in seismological institutions successfully obfuscated the detonation of a nuclear device at the testing site, altering data to suggest that the detonation site was actually in North Korea. The unintentional willingness of the North Korean regime to declare responsibility for this designation has assisted in obfuscation efforts. Additionally, SCP-173 has not produced any excretions in over a month. This is believed to be an effect of SCP-MORE GUN, however further tests involving the termination of anomalies have been postponed indefinitely.


TARGET ACTION: Acceleration of the European Union's legislative procedure to introduce amendments favorable to Foundation Sites, personnel, and assets within EU member states.13

ACTION TAKEN: 80 hypersonic "Kestrel" nuclear stealth cruise missiles launched from various outposts in the Arctic Circle, and 1 reinforced tungsten payload launched from CROM-D14 targeting Brussels. 13-columned "Aftakarok" meteorological thaumaturgic manifold encompassing the Brussels Metropolitan Area. Cruise missiles were coated with Class-IV15 cognitohazards via drones. Antimemetic sigils applied to tungsten payload. Noospheric concept of "projectiles" temporarily nudged towards "Belgium" .

RESULTS: SUCCESS. All physical projectiles spontaneously demanifested over Belgian airspace. Heavy rains over Western Europe for the subsequent 13 weeks. Foundation Sites, personnel, and assets within the European Union currently exempt from Regulations No 05/2007,16 11/2013,17 and 02/2020.18 Operation somehow went entirely unnoticed by other Groups of Interest.


GUNN: So that's where 173 went!

MOORE: Sorry, did I read this correctly? The Council launched 80 nukes towards Belgium?

CHEKOV: [Muffled.] Hah! The godless Belgians had it coming.

Dr. Chekov looks up from his moping session to stare at Dr. Moore and Dr. Gunn.

CHEKOV: Oh, you were being serious? Jesus Christ.

GUNN: Y'know, this doesn't seem that unreasonable a response to the second most byzantine bureaucracy in the world. If the O5 has bigger guns, what's so wrong with letting them use it to solve bigger problems?

MOORE: What part of "the O5 nuked Belgium" is not getting through to you?

GUNN: Obviously that's a major concern, yes, but what if uh… Hmm… Okay, I'm beginning to see why you're both so pissy about this.

CHEKOV: Holy hell, they've got plans in here to shoot the Sun… noospheric concepts… baseline reality… uhh… what's an Author?

MOORE: Alright, this has got to stop before they undershoot and break something in the laws of physics or the human psyche.

GUNN: And how would we, personnel of the Department of Other, the joke Department of the Foundation, change the minds of the most powerful people on the planet?

CHEKOV: We send them a strongly worded letter.

«END TRANSCRIPT»

AFTERWORD: A lengthy request for the indefinite postponement of future SCP-MORE GUN test was drafted and submitted for consideration by the O5 Council, outlining potential risks associated with the scope of their current tests, as well as the admonition of the Council for interfering in SCP-MORE GUN documentation without prior notification of the Department of Other.

ADDENDUM MORE GUN.2.1: Desperate Measures


TARGET ACTION: Suppress the O5 Council.

ACTION TAKEN: All assets available to the Department of Other utilized, including, but not limited to; tens of thousands of assorted firearms, several thousand missiles,19 both nuclear and conventional, SCP-1543-02,20 SCP-029-J-4,21 SCP-CN-2000-J-5,22 and an SCP-2041-J23 operated by Dr. Gerald.

RESULTS: SUCCESS. All O5 Council members spontaneously generated a moral compass and basic respect for the sanctity of human life. The Council has agreed to indefinitely postpone SCP-MORE GUN tests following a unanimous vote, among other motions and reforms, which also include the formation of an Ethics Committee24 to oversee and hold the O5 Council accountable for their more ethically ambiguous operations.

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