SCP-7836

rating: +40+x
Item#: 7836
Level1
Containment Class:
safe
Secondary Class:
N/A
Disruption Class:
dark
Risk Class:
notice

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-7836 is to be kept in a refrigerator in Site-175's kitchen outside of routine check-ups on SCP-7836-2 and requested uses. Personnel who wish to utilize SCP-7836 must request access to both an on-site psychiatrist and a staff member of Clearance Level 3 or higher.

Description: SCP-7836 is a sealed bag of shredded mozzarella cheese.1 The bag itself is non-anomalous. The cheese inside of the bag, however, will replenish itself if any is taken from the bag and, despite the bag being open since being brought into Foundation custody, does not appear to spoil as most cheeses have been observed to do.

Upon visually observing SCP-7836, individuals will feel compelled to unseal SCP-7836 and consume the cheese within, regardless of any self-imposed dietary limitations or medical conditions that would otherwise prohibit the consumption of dairy products. Once any quantity of cheese has been consumed by an affected individual (henceforth referred to as SCP-7836-1), a Soter Event will begin.

During a Soter Event, SCP-7836-1 instances will be "transported" to an office on the second floor of a building, with a window showing a view that the current SCP-7836-1 instance finds calming. In reality, SCP-7836-1 instances remain stationary in the position they were upon consuming the cheese from SCP-7836. It is currently unknown if the visual element of Soter Events is a hallucination or is an out of body experience. On rare occasions, audio recording devices held by SCP-7836-1 record audio produced during Soter Events. SCP-7836 houses a Type-III Superintelligence that manifests during Soter Events, henceforth referred to as SCP-7836-2.

Upon a Soter Event lasting anywhere between thirty seconds and six minutes, SCP-7836-2 will manifest in the office, entering it through a door. Exact descriptions of SCP-7836-2 vary between Soter Events, but there are a number of reported trends:

SCP-7836-2 will always appear as a human male, appearing to be in his mid to late 30s.

SCP-7836-2 always manifests holding a sheaf of papers or a clipboard.

SCP-7836-2 speaks with a French, German, Italian or Polish accent, and will always address SCP-7836-1 instances in their native language.

SCP-7836-2 will always appear with blonde hair and a skin tone described as "Creamy."

SCP-7836-2 is fond of puns, specifically those based around cheeses.2

SCP-7836-2 claims its name is "Jack Monterey"3 and that it is "The most unbrielievable therapist you could find in a bag of cheese."

Once inside the office, SCP-7836-2 will seat itself in a comfortable location, such as a couch, chair or, if nothing else is usable as a seat, the floor and ask SCP-7836-1 to do the same, willingly giving up its own seat to allow SCP-7836-1 to be more comfortable. Once both parties are seated, SCP-7836-2 will begin to read through the papers gradually and ask SCP-7836-1 questions related to their lives, jobs and personal relationships. SCP-7836-1 instances report a feeling of comfort around SCP-7836-2, stating that, at the time, they "felt like they could tell him anything." As a result, many SCP-7836-1 instances will answer with honesty and genuine emotion.

Upon having learned of the majority of a person's life4, SCP-7836-2 will put down its papers and begin to ask questions about SCP-7836-1's mental health, generally interjecting to help them find words to describe things. After the previous two parts of an event have taken place, questioning usually reported taking between twenty minutes to three hours, SCP-7836-2 will stop asking questions and offer SCP-7836-1. This advice has most commonly taken the form of self-help, such as ways of coping with the loss of a loved one, combatting drug addictions and stamping out problematic behavior in their day-to-day life. After offering the advice, SCP-7836-2 will stand and leave the office, ending the Soter Event.

Discovery: SCP-7836 was discovered by Junior Researchers Saoirse Daley and Leanna Smith on 30/07/21, while assisting kitchen staff with the preparation of that evening's food. Daley and Smith discovered SCP-7836 at the back of a refrigerator and Smith subsequently became the first known SCP-7836-1 instance. The object was brought to the attention of the wider staff body and was contained later that day.

FROM: ten.piks|rekabf#ten.piks|rekabf
TO: ten.piks|asumutcerid#ten.piks|asumutcerid
SUBJECT: SCP-7836 again.


Good afternoon sir. I know you're quite busy currently, what with needing to rebuild parts of the Site and all, but I'd like to ask you to reconsider on the matter of 7836. I've been testing with it for the last few months, and nobody seems to have been mind controlled, body snatched or anything of the sort. In fact, I'm hearing nothing but thanks to Jack- or rather, SCP-7836-2, in that regard. Is it a bit weird? Yes, but I prefer to take that as a sign what it's doing is genuinely helping as opposed to brain hijacking. Please, do reconsider opening use to the wider Site, some people definitely need it after what happened.

Sincerely,
Frederick Baker

P.S: Need an electrician on Sublevel 3, breaker box is on the fritz again.

FROM: ten.piks|asumutcerid#ten.piks|asumutcerid
TO: ten.piks|rekabf#ten.piks|rekabf
SUBJECT: RE: SCP-7836 again.


Hello Frederick.

I recently reviewed 7836's entry on the database. Seems like you've been busy. I do agree, it seems like it could be quite a helpful anomaly, recent containment breach and related traumas aside. I'm still somewhat reluctant to both open up an anomaly for Sitewide use, as well as potentially laying off -Site psychologists. We don't know how it gets information on people, especially such in-depth things like previous friends and holidays. I've considered, and I'll do it. On one condition. Use it yourself. Ask SCP-7836-2 a few more questions, and let him work his weird, cheese-therapy-man magic on you. I think it'll do you good.

Also, I'll send that electrician down. Have a nice day.

P.S: You don't need to sign off every email like it's a letter, it's the 21st Century.

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