SCP-7822

We found her behind a door, and left her behind another.

rating: +53+x

Item #: SCP-7822

Object Class: Safe

Camera image taken from SCP-7822's containment cell.
SCP-7822 in its idle state.

Notice: As of 18/06/2017, the following containment procedures are considered outdated and are pending revision.

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-7822 is restricted to Site-138’s archival wing under the direct supervision of SCP-7822-1, who bears full responsibility for its conduct. When not engaged in assigned duties, it is to remain contained within a standard humanoid containment cell.

SCP-7822-1 is to avoid any activity liable to cause SCP-7822 to abandon its post and must remain continuously reachable via Foundation-issued telecommunication. To ensure compliance with Protocol Aubain-7822, SCP-7822-1 undergoes a monthly evaluation by qualified personnel. If it exhibits behaviour threatening protocol directives, termination procedures are to be enacted.

Description: SCP-7822 resembles a 162 cm tall adult woman of Western European origin. It possesses long blonde hair arranged in a bun and wears a black dress with a white apron and headpiece. Its only deviations from this anatomy are an absence of facial features and a series of metallic sutures embedded along a section of the spine, features believed to indicate an artificial origin. Despite lacking discernible sensory organs, it remains responsive to visual and olfactory stimuli.

The designation SCP-7822-1 applies to any individual to whom SCP-7822 has affixed its servitude, a bond that is irreversible. SCP-7822-1 experiences no anomalous alteration and is not compelled or otherwise bound to SCP-7822.

SCP-7822 will execute any command issued by SCP-7822-1 to the fullest extent of its capabilities. When unable to perform or understand a command, or when no commands are assigned or pending, SCP-7822 will assume an idle state (see image above). It may temporarily interrupt this state to perform a limited range of unprompted actions, including:

  • Maintaining a proximity of 10 m with SCP-7822-1, whose location it remains continually aware of.
  • Maintenance of its appearance.
  • Cleaning nearby surroundings.
  • Intervention to prevent physical harm to SCP-7822-1.

Following a single exposure, SCP-7822 can accurately reproduce observed procedures with high precision and retain large amounts of information indefinitely. This aptitude is paired with an absence of introspective reasoning, independent decision-making, or initiative beyond assigned parameters.

Upon the death of SCP-7822-1, SCP-7822 autonomously bonds with the nearest individual within 24 to 48 hours.

Addendum:

12/04/1860 – Field Containment Report - 7822-002


Report: It was discovered that Nobile ████ ██ ████ had fled his château for Sardinia, presumably in an attempt to seek refuge. 3 days after his flight, French government representative Mr. Pierre Richaud, in the company of Remo Paolo Attanasio,3 visited the estate to assess the newly inherited French property.

Upon further examination, they heard persistent "loud banging" noises emanating from the lower chambers. Following the sound led them to a barricaded cellar, which was curiously clean compared to the rest of the basement. Inside, they discovered a faceless maid-like entity. It showed no signs of hostility but possessed a compulsion to follow Mr. Richaud. Hence, both the entity and Mr. Richaud were taken into custody at our nearby observation post [now decommissioned].

Addendum: A subsequent inquiry revealed that Nobile ████ ██ ████’s vessel had sunk during its transit between Genoa and Sardinia, ensuring no further claim to the estate or its contents.


30/04/1860 – Containment Report - 7822-01


Report: We have filed the maid's discovery to headquarters. While we await a response, we have given it the provisional moniker Félicité.

Félicité responds uniquely to Pierre Richaud and to commands issued in a French dialect native to Haute-Savoie, which he fortunately speaks rudimentarily. In light of these findings, Pierre has been inducted into the team for further study of Félicité.

Given that Félicité has not shown any signs of being a risk, has proven easy to contain, and is proficient in activities associated with domestic servants, we have unanimously decided to employ it. It will clean the observation post daily and provide assistance in the kitchen at noon. When not otherwise occupied, it will return to its containment unit.

Addendum: We have all enjoyed an improvement in meal quality following Félicité's integration into the kitchen.


10/02/1861 – Status Report - 7822-02


Report: We have received a reply! Félicité has officially been registered as SCP-7822!

We recently noticed she has acquired an understanding of proper French and Italian. Although we take pride in her progress, we were stunned by her grasp of Italian, given how rarely it is spoken.

In an effort to probe the limits of her aptitude, we devised increasingly elaborate trials in which her overall performance significantly exceeded our expectations.

Addendum: SCP-7822 was taught literacy in several European languages to assist with translating incoming and outgoing mail. However, she struggles with expressions, which she translates literally. An issue that has led to amusing results.

Pierre Richaud has taught SCP-7822 to deal Vingt-et-Un. While not inherently beneficial to operations, it has improved team morale during downtime.


12/05/1863 – Status Report - 7822-03


Report: Following Pierre Richaud’s passing, we returned from the hospital to find SCP-7822 standing motionless in the corner of her cell. All attempts to elicit a response failed. Concerned for her well-being, we instituted a rotational watch. During Francisse Roux’s night shift, she abruptly began following and obeying him, a development he welcomed with much enthusiasm, but that left the rest of us slightly unnerved.

Addendum: We were recently put into correspondence with the Director of future Site-138, who has expressed great interest in SCP-7822's capabilities.


10/07/1870 – Containment Report - 7822-04


Report: After lengthy negotiations and due to the increasing instability caused by the war, we have decided to relocate SCP-7822 to the newly constructed Site-138 within neutral Swiss territory.

The transfer of SCP-7822 and SCP-7822-1-B is scheduled to take place 2 days following the transcription of this report. The relocation will be conducted under the cover of a routine wine shipment.

Addendum: Good Luck to both of you!
- The team, Jean, André, and Remo.


30/09/1870 – Operational Report - 7822-05


Report: SCP-7822-1-B passed away from pneumonia shortly after SCP-7822's transfer. This prompted research teams to investigate its designation processes further through the use of multiple D-Class personnel.

Given SCP-7822's lack of ethical discernment and apparent reliance on SCP-7822-1 for directions, site security and administration developed Protocol Aubain-7822. This protocol establishes the psychological criteria and clearance levels required by future SCP-7822-1 candidates.

Dr. Hans-Rudolf Müller was selected as SCP-7822-1-F.

SCP-7822 was instructed in the operation of typewriters.

A trial period, designated Project Cœur-Simple, was initiated on 21/08/1870 and will span one year. Its goal is to evaluate the possibility of repurposing SCP-7822 for site operations. During this period, SCP-7822-1-F will direct and supervise SCP-7822 with the assistance of his team. Any unexpected behaviour is to be reported to site security immediately.

Addendum: When SCP-7822 first arrived, it was noted an observation post employee badge was pinned to its uniform just below its collar. Though not formally authorised, the badge has been left in place at SCP-7822-1-B's request.


15/11/1871 – Status Report - 7822-06


Report: Project Cœur-Simple has concluded, yielding positive results. Its efficiency surpassed that of available staff and mechanical systems, the impact of which has been widely praised by personnel.

As an additional precautionary measure, SCP-7822 was regularly interviewed for further evaluation of its mental framework. It would communicate via the use of a typewriter. These interviews highlighted SCP-7822's encyclopedic memory.

These traits make SCP-7822 an ideal auxiliary for repetitive clerical labour. As a result, its repurposing has been approved as a computing asset for tabulation and inventory tracking.

Addendum: SCP-7822-1-F had made unofficial arrangements for SCP-7822 to deliver coffee to designated offices before 08:15. Both he and his team were reminded that SCP-7822 should be regarded as an ancillary, not a junior. To prevent similar issues, personnel will now maintain a professional distance from SCP-7822.


10/02/1940 – Operational Report - 7822-07


Report: In response to increased administrative burdens caused by wartime transfers and safeguarding requests from sister European sites, SCP-7822-1-H4 submitted a proposal to repurpose SCP-7822 as an archival management system responsible for records and ledgers. The system would provide near-instantaneous document retrieval at any hour, allowing staff to focus on higher-priority duties, while SCP-7822-1-H would relay document requests to SCP-7822 through the office intercom.

Though the Site Director expressed reservations about entrusting Foundation records to an anomalous appliance, several senior personnel endorsed the proposal, citing SCP-7822’s decades of reliable service. A limited pilot program, restricted to non-sensitive materials, was authorised on 05/02/1940.

Addendum: During one of SCP-7822’s deliveries to the medical block, researchers took the opportunity to conduct an X-ray examination. Results show its skull appears to be the result of a forced fusion between two parietal lobes, creating an expanded cerebral volume. This condition is believed to be partly responsible for its retention capabilities.


10/03/1940 – Status Report - 7822-08


Report: Following the ongoing escalation of wartime demands and a marked improvement in administrative throughput during the pilot phase, full implementation of the archival retrieval system has been approved. SCP-7822 is now authorised to manage materials to the same extent as SCP-7822-1-H.

Addendum: A dedicated containment unit has been constructed adjacent to the archival wing to accommodate SCP-7822.


25/08/1964 – Status Report - 7822-09


Report: Site-138 now possesses a facility-wide fax network. SCP-7822 will transmit documents using this network rather than delivering them in person, unless stated otherwise.

Addendum: SCP-7822-1-H was issued formal commendation for services rendered in the modernisation of Site-138 archival operations.


19/04/1985 – Status Report - 7822-10


Report: With the implementation of computerised systems complete, SCP-7822 was tasked with transferring physical records and ledgers into the digital space.

SCP-7822 remains the sole continuous operator within the archival wing. It is to update legacy archives with information received via email. To this effect, it has been assigned a dedicated address, jointly managed by SCP-7822-1-I:

tni.pcs|831.evihcra#tni.pcs|831.evihcra

Addendum: With the decrease in instructions, SCP-7822 has been observed performing a daily routine of dusting shelves and visually inspecting stored documents to ensure they remain properly aligned. Its list of autonomous behaviours has been updated accordingly.

Epidermal tissue from SCP-7822 was sent in for DNA sequencing. Results indicated it is composed of 3 distinct human genomes, further supporting hypotheses regarding its origins.


18/06/2017 – Containment Report - 7822-11


Report: The Foundation's modern algorithms have significantly surpassed SCP-7822's processing speed, and the transition to a fully digital archival platform has rendered its assistance obsolete.

A proposal by SCP-7822-1-I to once again utilise SCP-7822 for facility maintenance was approved until her retirement on 17/06/2017.

Effective immediately, SCP-7822 is placed on indefinite standby within its containment cell. Protocol Aubain-7822 has been suspended.

Addendum: N/A


05/11/2022 – Incident Report - 7822-12


Report: Following the death of SCP-7822-1-I, personnel passing by the archival wing reported persistent "loud banging" noises emanating from SCP-7822's containment cell. Surveillance confirmed that it is repeatedly applying force to the cell's door. This behaviour is believed to be an autonomous attempt by SCP-7822 to reunite with SCP-7822-1-J.

Sound-dampening insulation has been installed to mitigate auditory disturbances.5

Addendum: N/A

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