SCP-7054
rating: +18+x

Item #: SCP-7054

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: Foundation assets are to monitor media platforms where SCP-7054 is known to have purchased ad spaces to determine when and where SCP-7054 will next manifest.

In the event that SCP-7054 manifests, a cover story is to be made to vacate the premises where SCP-7054 manifests no less than 12 hours before it enters baseline reality, and no Foundation personnel not specifically authorized by Level 4 or above research personnel or MTF-Lambda-14 ("One Star Reviewers") Captain Gray Savoy may enter the building.

As no means have been discovered for the permanent containment of SCP-7054 or the entities therein, Foundation efforts are instead to be directed towards disrupting the revenue of the establishment as a means to force it to vacate baseline reality.

Description: SCP-7054 refers to an extradimensional retail bar that will manifest in vacant lots or open areas in major metropolitan areas or other population centers in our baseline reality. It is roughly 75 sq m, and possesses exterior decor consistent with that of a 19th-century Irish homestead. A hanging sign by the front entrance reads "Peter's Pop-Up Pub."

SCP-7054 is frequented by humanoid patrons hailing from other realities, as well as other anomalies known to the Foundation that possess extra or interdimensional properties. The means by which it attracts these entities is unknown, however, the establishment is known to purchase ad spaces in SCP-5402-1, an interdimensional newspaper, as well as other nonanomalous media such as The Boston Globe, The Moscow Times, The San Francisco Chronicle and others depending on where it manifests.

With the exception of the patrons, the interior of SCP-7054 primarily resembles a nonanomalous Irish pub, with a single room divided into a bar and dining area. Among the furniture is a pool table, as well as a black-and-white television set. The tv is often set to sports channels from other realities, which primarily play rugby and soccer matches featuring extradimensional humanoid athletes.

SCP-7054-1 refers to a humanoid entity that acts as the barkeeper and self-professed owner of SCP-7054. It appears as a rotund male in his late forties and stands approximately 1.7 m tall. SCP-7054-1 regularly dons attire consistent with bartenders of the late 19th to early 20th century, such as a formal vest, bow tie, and apron. It speaks with a thick Irish accent, and will refer to itself as "Pete."

SCP-7054-1 possesses the ability to brew alcoholic beverages which have varied anomalous properties. These beverages possess the collective designation of SCP-7054-1-A, and include, but are not limited to, the following:

Drink Properties Price
Adam's Apple Cider A glass of spiked apple cider that temporarily raises the drinker's intelligence. SCP-7054-1 claims to have procured the ingredients for this beverage from an individual named "Uriel." 7.99 USD
Blue Comrade A blue beverage otherwise similar to a White Russian. The drinker will grow a thick set of facial hair and espouse communist slogans until the alcohol wears off. 6.99 USD
Double Vision A glass of lager that, when consumed, causes others to view two images of the drinker, similar to the effects of diplopia.1 4.99 USD
Great Scotch! A glass of Scotch that, when consumed, causes the drinker to view an event from the perspective of themselves two to three years in the past. 7.99 USD
Liquid Courage A beverage served in a shot glass that temporarily improves the singing talent of the drinker. SCP-7054-1 often offers this beverage at a discounted price on karaoke night. 4.99 USD
Lovecraftian Lager Lager served in a container composed of an unidentified green, organic material shaped to resemble a cup. When served, a series of prehensile tentacles will sprout from the sides of the cup and walk it across the bartop to the drinker. It invokes an intense feeling of euphoria when consumed. However, sufficiently intoxicated drinkers will suffer severe hallucinogenic effects and may claim to have witnessed how they will die while under the drink's influence. 9.99 USD
Screaming Suds A tin beer can of a nonexistent brand. It possesses a makeshift face consisting of googly eyes and a pipe cleaner mouth hot glued to its front. Upon being opened, the can will become animate and plead with the drinker not to consume it. 4.99 USD
Shaken, Not Stirred A martini cocktail that causes the drinker to speak with a traditionally upper-class British accent. 8.99 USD
Tropic Thunder Spiked juice served in a hollowed-out pineapple. When consumed, it causes the drinker to believe themselves to be relaxing on a beachside and invokes feelings of physical warmth and relaxation. 7.99 USD

SCP-7054-1 is believed to be the entity responsible for moving SCP-7054 across realities and locations, however the means by which it accomplishes this are unknown.

SCP-7054-2 is a mechanical bronze automaton that is humanoid in design. It is 2.3 m tall, and dons attire similar to SCP-7054-1, who refers to it as "The Bouncer." The entity is anomalously strong and resilient to physical damage, and does not appear to be sentient. SCP-7054-1 may summon it to remove unruly patrons from the premises.

Addendum 7054.1: Discovery

04/24/2022: An instance of SCP-5402-1 recovered by MTF-Lambda-8 ("Newsies") was found to contain an advertisement that read as follows:

PETER'S POP-UP PUB

It's Beer O'Clock in Earth-13, because Peter's Pop-Up Pub, the oldest transdimensional bar and eatery in the cosmos, is coming to Boston, Massachusetts! Now with a B+ health rating from the Interdimensional Culinary Coalition!

Keep an eye out for us on Brookline Avenue this Friday!

On Thursday, March 28, Foundation assets in the Massachussetts Office of Public Safety and Inspections (OPSI) closed Brookline Avenue under the cover story of a sewage leak. At 7:00 AM EST, SCP-7054 manifested on the street. Two hours after its first appearance, MTF-Lambda-14 were sent inside on an investigative mission.

Bodycam footage revealed an assortment of anomalous humanoid patrons, none of which were then known to the Foundation database. The majority of the entities looked up to acknowledge MTF-Lambda-14's entrance, however quickly disregarded them. SCP-7054-1, who was polishing a glass, instructed the agents to leave their tactical weapons on the coat rack by the front entrance.

MTF Agent Blaskowitz was instructed by team leader Savoy to question SCP-7054-1, leading to the following interaction:

Blaskowitz: Sir, are you aware that you are tresp–

SCP-7054-1: Uh-uh lad, conversation ain't free. [Gestures to the menu above its head] Pick your fancy son, this is a business after all.

Blaskowitz: [Peruses the list of drinks] I'll, uh… Just a club soda, thanks.

SCP-7054-1: Not feeling very brave, are ye'? No judging, we've served lightweights all over the cosmos. [SCP-7054-1 snaps its fingers. A nonanomalous club soda manifests in front of Agent Blaskowitz] You use the dollar, yeah? That'll be a buck fifty.

Blaskowitz: Sir, are you aware you're trespassing into this reality?

SCP-7054-1: Tresspassing smeshpassing, I've been running this business since your great-grandpappy was wearin' nappers. Wherever someone needs some comfort food with a drink, Peter's Pop-Up Pub ain't gonna be far behind.

Blaskowitz: Peter's Pop-Up Pub. So does that make you–?

SCP-7054-1: Pete, at your service.

Blaskowitz: Okay, so "Pete," exactly how long do you intend to stay here?

SCP-7054-1: Long as there's business. Some o' our most loyal barflies are from the thirteenth, we're practically a Boston staple. So I don't think you're gonna shoo us out anytime soon.

Blaskowitz: Uh-huh. So… say there wasn't any business. Just hypothetically speaking, what if the road you were on got shut down, or nobody could enter?

SCP-7054-1: [Furrows his brow] Are you tryin' ta extort me, laddie? Military men or no, I ain't gonna let some black-clad chancers like you lot run me outta business.

Blaskowitz: [Radios in] Site, prepare a temporary containment cell, this might get hostile.

SCP-7054-1: Oh, I'll show you "hostile." [Puts its fingers to its mouth and lets out a shrill whistle] Time fer you ta leave, you lot of gobshites.

[SCP-7054-2 emerges through a set of double doors behind the bar area. MTF-Lambda-14 opens fire on the entity to no effect. SCP-7054-2 proceeds to pick the agents up two at a time and throw them outside through the front entrance]

SCP-7054-1: [Yelling from inside] And stay out, you sorry saps! [SCP-7054-1 snaps its fingers. SCP-7054 demanifests immediately thereafter]

Leader Savoy: That certainly could have gone better. But, for the time being, I think we've found a fairly effective means to contain this entity. Whatever that bartender really is, it regards itself as a businessman. As long as we can disrupt its source of revenue, it shouldn't be too difficult to boot it back out of our reality.

Addendum 7054.2:

Since incident 7054.1, SCP-7054 has been encountered in our baseline reality on three more occasions, listed below:

06/05/2022 SCP-7054 manifests on Tverskaya Street in Moscow, Russia.
08/28/2022 SCP-7054 manifests on Market Street in San Francisco, California.
12/25/2022 SCP-7054 manifests on Grafton Street in Dublin, Ireland. All drinks are offered half off for a Christmas special.

On all three occasions, agents of MTF-Lambda-14 were sent undercover into SCP-7054 disguised as patrons to collect further data on the establishment and the entities within. There have been no further incidents thus far.

At the approval of Site-19 Director B███, MTF-Lambda-14 sent three undercover agents(Agent(s) Blaskowtiz, Sawyer, and Gregory) into SCP-7054 during its manifestation on December 25, 2022 with approximately 1,300 USD in discretionary spending. There they procured instances of SCP-7054-1-A to be distributed at the then-upcoming Site-19 New Year's Eve party.

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