SCP-7031

rating: +62+x
Item#: 7031
Level4
Containment Class:
keter
Secondary Class:
none
Disruption Class:
ekhi
Risk Class:
critical


Special Containment Procedures: As of 1/8/1980, civilian access to Australia is forbidden. Disinformation campaigns seek to portray Australia as a prosperous first-world country. Site-300-12 personnel are tasked with border patrol to prevent entry or exit from the country, in addition to general land survey. Airlines claiming to fly to Australia are supplied with image manipulation software and Class-E amnestics.

Description: SCP-7031 is a series of frequent ontokinetic disruptions affecting the country of Australia. The risk class of these disruptions range from Notice to Critical. Whilst Foundation monitoring only began in the 1910s, retrospective research implies that SCP-7031 has been escalating since European settlement. The anomaly is caused by the population of Australia, designated SCP-7031-1.

Addendum 7031-1
Below is an excerpt of documented SCP-7031 instances in chronological order.

SITE 300-12 REPORT


Year: 1911

Description: Macropus giganteus1 instances held in underground kangaroo boxing rings develop anomalous upper-body strength. No discernible cause. ≈500 injuries, 14 deaths.

Response: Embedded Foundation agents informed local authorities. Casualties drastically reduced.



Year: 1936

Description: All instances of Latrodectus hasselti2 present in the country grow to five metres in height.

Response: Site-300-12 personnel equipped with flamethrowers.



Year: 1957

Description: Phascolarctos cinereus3 instances begin periodically manifesting above SCP-7031-1 instances, leaving debilitating claw marks upon contact.

Response: Site-300-12 personnel equipped with riot helmets. Drop bear hoax issued.



Year: N/A

Description: Retrospective analysis reveals a large mass of land in South Australia was retrocausally erased. Previous population unknown. Location renamed to The Great Australian Bight.

Response: None.



Year: 1980

Description: Dromaius novaehollandiae4 instances manifest outside Site-300-12, and begin harassing personnel. Several on-site guards are tasked with pest removal. Instances are too quantitative for conventional firearms. Limited access to thaumaturgical arms permitted. Operation appears successful, before a larger quantity of instances manifest. A day after the incident, the emus overrun Site-300-12. The takeover exploited several weaknesses in Site-300-12, including architectural choke points, emergency firearm locations, and electricity shut off points. [EXPUNGED], on-site warhead detonated.

Response: Site-300-13 pending construction approval. Personnel temporarily housed at Provisional Shelter-300-12-α.



Year: 1985

Description: Landmass ceases to exist for exactly six hours, 47 minutes and 36 seconds. Personnel and SCP-7031-1 instances showed signs of distress when informed. Water displacement results in dramatically decreased sea levels and catastrophic tropical hurricanes throughout Oceania.

Response: Civilian satellite data sanitised. Information relayed anonymously to Parawatch forum. Conspiracy theory successfully propagated. Research Site-45 is undergoing major repairs following typhoon damage.



Year: 1999

Description: Gravity field forms around the Northern Territory, terminating all unsecured SCP-7031-1 instances in the vicinity, and ejecting a large amount of debris into exosphere.

Response: Provisional Shelter-300-12-α redesigned to accommodate gravitational change. Personnel equipped with ground harnesses. Proposal pending to retrieve ≈146 000 SCP-7031-1 instances.


Addendum 7031-2

INTERVIEW LOG 7031-1-1


Interviewer: Dr. Patrick Miller

Interviewee: SCP-7031-1-384

Foreword:
SCP-7031-1-384 was offered shelter and nourishment at Provisional Shelter-300-12-α, in exchange for an interview. On-site thaumaturges declared him almost entirely non-anomalous.

<Begin Log>

[An assortment of nuts, apple slices, and other appetisers are present on the table, in an effort to placate SCP-7031-1-384. Upon entering the room, it darts for the table, and begins rapidly consuming the platter.]

Miller: (nervously) Heh, rather… ravenous, aren't we?

[SCP-7031-1-384 ignores Miller, instead fixated on the platter. Miller removes his Foundation-issued phone from his pocket and notes not to include food in Site-300-12 interviews. He returns his phone and begins twiddling his thumbs.]

[23 seconds pass. SCP-7031-1-384 finishes the platter, save for scraps left on the table and its face.]

SCP-7031-1-384: Fuck, me. Good tucker, mate, good tucker.

Miller: (shakily) So, do you, uh…

[Miller is visibly wracking his mind. He pulls out his phone and opens the interview questions. SCP-7031-1-384 stares at the phone in confusion, before shrugging to himself.]

Miller: (reading off phone) 'How long have you been aware of the anomalous?'

SCP-7031-1-384: Anomalous?

Miller: Well… disappearing lakes, variable gravity, fifteen foot spi- -

SCP-7031-1-384: Spider's got eight feet, mate.

Miller: Yes, well, how long has reality been this… fluid?

SCP-7031-1-384: Longer than I know, mate. Not sure which world you're livin' in to call that anomalous.

Miller: Very well then. 'How do you survive in such volatile circumstances?'

SCP-7031-1-384: Ah, y'know. Don't pick bones. Most of the time, if you end up disassembled, you had it coming. Sometimes the more dangerous lot just dunno how to control themselves, so end of the day, it's a matter of luck. That's why I came along when you piped up 'bout those Scranton boxes.

Miller: Thank you, now I understand. Unfortunately, you will have to leave the Site after the interview.

[SCP-7031-1-384's enthusiasm visibly drops. 10 seconds of silence passes]

Miller: We can, however, offer rations and limited tranquilising weaponr- -

SCP-7031-1-384 Look, mate, I won't cause fuss. Dump me in one of those sleeping quarters, the cells, even the fucking janitor's closet. You won't hear shit from me. That eating fit was me on a bad day. I've built houses on two nuts and a banana, my upkeep'll be a blip on your budget.

Miller: Well, I really am sorry, but you'll have to contact my super- -

[SCP-7031-1-384 reaches over and grabs Miller by the collar.]

SCP-7031-1-384: You fucking whitecoats just take what you want and discard the rest, huh? I don't know how the fuck you think things roll in red country, but you wanted me, so you'll get me.

[Miller signals to the guard in the corner, who cocks his pistol in warning. SCP-7031-1-384 turns his neck to look at the guard, then slowly returned to its seat. The guard resets his pistol.]

Miller: Hey, you're alright. We'll let you go after the interview, we just have one more - -

SCP-7031-1-384: Are you even fucking lis- -

Miller: Yes. Now listen to me.

[SCP-7031-1-384 relaxes in its seat, staring Miller down in defiance.]

Miller: Okay. 'Have you ever been out of the country?'

SCP-7031-1-384: Country? You speakin' blackfella or somethin'?

Miller: Country. To another landmass, away from all the disassemblers and the spiders and such.

[SCP-7031-1-384's eyes widen.]

SCP-7031-1-384: Hang on. You're saying there are… normal places?

Miller: Uh, yeah. Australia is one of seven large land masses.

[Tears well up in SCP-7031-1-384's eyes]

SCP-7031-1-384: Aw, fuck me. I… I've been spending the past 27 years laying awake at night wondering how… how I've been so lucky all these- I… I'm free! I can live a life with normal gravity, with normal bush turk- -

Miller: Just… hang on. I've got bad news on that front. We've been tasked with keeping it normal, so you're grounded for-

[SCP-7031-1-384 demanifests from the interview room.]

Miller: Hello?

<End Log>

Closing Statement: On-site technicians noted that all Scranton Reality Anchors were not malfunctioning during the interview. Ontokinetics experts deduced that the demanifestation was too irregular to reach a conclusion.



Following this incident, Foundation face-recognition software identified SCP-7031-1-384 in the background of an Instagram post of a Bali night club. Upon discovery, the individual was terminated, and nearby civilians were amnesticised.

Addendum 7031-3

O5 COUNCIL VOTE TO DECOMMISSION SCP-7031


BACKGROUND: On 1/6/05, SCP-7031-1-384 teleported from Provisional Shelter-300-12-α to a party in Bali, Indonesia. It was in the presence of several functioning Scranton Reality Anchors, and measured a Hume level of 76. This, in addition to further research, indicates that our current countermeasures are ineffectual on the Australian ontokinetic variant.

PROPOSAL: Our lack of ability on this front poses an Amida-Critical threat, and possibly a CK-Class Restructuring Scenario. As such, Provisional Shelter-300-12-α is to be equipped with arms from Site-300-01 and Site-300-14 in order to decommission all SCP-7031-1 instances.

COUNCIL VOTE SUMMARY:
YEA NAY ABSTAIN
05-1
05-2
05-3
05-4
05-5
05-6
05-7
05-8
05-9
05-10
05-11
05-12
05-13

STATUS
APPROVED

ETHICS COMMITTEE VETO


The Australian variant has demonstrated an incompatibility with our current understanding of reality benders. As a result, we cannot guarantee the consequences of decommissioning attempts. We would be risking mass personnel casualties, and further escalation of the country's circumstances. The most sensible approach moving forward is close observation and further research.



Addenum 7031-4

Soon after the SCP-7031-1-384 incident, numerous ontologically disruptions tied to SCP-7031 began occuring across the globe. Below is an excerpt of SCP-7031 instances outside of Australia.

SCP-7031 INSTANCES


Year: 2007

Location: Site-43, Canada

Description: Antaresia childreni5 instance manifests under the sheets of Dr. William Wettle's bed. Dr. Wettle displayed signs of extreme distress, claiming to be experiencing venomous side effects. No bite marks were found on Dr. Wettle's person.

Response: Sick leave request denied. Dr. William Wettle was informed that pythons are non-venomous.



Year: 2009

Location: Coldingham Bay, Scotland

Description: The Twelve Apostles in Victoria demanifest from their location and reappear 100 metres from the Scottish shore.

Response: Geological records sanitised.



Year: 2009

Location: Mumbai, India

Description: Locals report being swooped by an inordinate number of Gymnorhina tibicen6 instances while cycling.

Response: Cover Story-19DFII ("Invasive Species") issued.



Year: 2011

Location: Wisconsin, USA

Description: All suburban housing in the town of Brewer's Hill is spontaneously replaced by Federation era buildings7. Suburb reverts after six days.

Response: Foundation forces quarantined the suburb under the guise of US Army soldiers. Inhabitants of Brewer's Hill and surrounding suburbs administered Class-A amnestics.



Year: 2014

Location: Schiaparelli Crater, Mars

Description: The Sydney Opera House is spotted upside-down in the center of the crater.

Response: Satellite data sanitised. Removal pending approval.



Year: 2018

Location: Krasnoyarsk Krai, Russia

Description: Emus responsible for the destruction of Site-300-12 orchestrate a successful takeover of Provisional Shelter-300-12-α. CCTV shows emus utilising the on-site extra-dimensional transport to Site-300-14.

Response: Communication lost with Site-300-14. Technicians at Site-300-14 are currently unable to disable the inter-Site teleportation network, nor access the SCUTTLE system. Investigation ongoing.



Year: 2022

Location: Three Portlands

Description: 33GL of water manifest above the town. ≈28 000 casualties before local thaumaturgists intervened. Extant anti-Foundation sentiment explodes. Far-left extremist group 'One Portland' calls for the UIU to detach 3P from baseline reality. Provisional Shelter-300-12-α drone surveillance reveals Lake Burley Griffin, Canberra to be empty.

Response: The Foundation offers $54 billion and 4200 personnel, as contractually obliged.




Addendum 7031-4

Following historical research mandated by the Ethics Committee, the below documents were seized from the British Library.

14/12/1780


Captain James Cook FRS,

We offer our gratitude for your discovery of the southern land. If the land is indeed confirmed to be terra nullius, we will send men and resources posthaste.

His Majesty seems eager to commence, as following the independence of our colony America, convict transport has been limited. The paranormal vagrants plaguing England have only increased in power and number. Without intervention, England's reputation will be comparable to that of a post-Occult War slum. The Englishman will not know which dimension he shall find himself the next day, which eldritch horror will digest and regurgitate him, nor whether he can trust time itself. His Majesty will not be the last King of England.

His Majesty's Foundation for the Secure Containment of the Paranormal.

17/2/1787


HMFSCP,

I express my deepest gratitude. His Majesty selected me for my excellent exploratory record, and this expedition will be a reflection of this. The territory is indeed terra nullius. There is a tribe of dark-skinned natives proving to be detrimental to our nascent operations, but they are not coordinated nor advanced enough to pose a lasting threat.

We are aware of the capabilities of the convicts coming our way. Every colony has several muffling runes, and our thaumaturges are some of the best in Europe. Containment does not get more secure than this.

Captain James Cook FRS.

29/5/1794


Captain James Cook FRS,

His Majesty is greatly pleased by this news. The people of England have displayed a much needed boost in morale knowing that we are rid of the paranormal scourge.

This message should be arriving with some low-risk paranormal convicts. We will be sending more volatile convicts in phases.

His Majesty's Foundation for the Secure Containment of the Paranormal.

8/9/1801


HMFSCP,

With the luck of a new century comes yielding convicts and steady progress. Not only do we find ourselves protecting paranormal convicts, but merchants and newborns. The progress over the last 20 years brings a tear to the eye. England shall persevere. No American independence nor Occult War shall bring it to the standards of those European slums. Thousands of convicts are under our secure care, and millions more are to come. May His Majesty's Foundation persist for centuries to come.

Captain James Cook FRS.
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