SCP-6767-J is Jimi Hendrix and he’s fucking awesome
The coolest human being to ever live
Item #: SCP-6767-J
Object Class: Cool as hell
Special Containment Procedures: Remembered in the hearts of the masses.
Description: SCP-6767-J is Jimi Hendrix and he’s fucking awesome. His songs are awesome, his get up is awesome, his guitar is awesome1; anyone who says that they don’t like Jimi Hendrix is a liar.
Addendum: I did some tests to show that Jimi Hendrix is actually the greatest human being ever born by telling people about how cool he is.
Test 1
NAME: Terry
FAVORITE GENRE: Big Band Jazz
RESULT:
Terry said he wasn’t a big fan of Jimi Hendrix.
Test 2
NAME: Terry
FAVORITE GENRE: Big Band Jazz
RESULT:
Terry was confused, and said I’d already asked him that.
Test 3
NAME: Terry
FAVORITE GENRE: Big Band Jazz
RESULT:
Terry asked why I was still talking about how Jimi Hendrix is cool as fuck.
Test 4
NAME: Terry
FAVORITE GENRE: Big Band Jazz
RESULT:
Terry asked to be left alone, and stopped talking to me.
Test 5
NAME: Terry
FAVORITE GENRE: Big Band Jazz
RESULT:
Terry said he would report me to HR if I didn’t stop, and said that this was unhealthy.
Test 6
NAME: Terry
FAVORITE GENRE: Big Band Jazz
RESULT:
Terry reported me to HR. I was fired from my job as a Jr. Researcher, but they forgot to take away my permissions.
Test 7
NAME: Terry
FAVORITE GENRE: Big Band Jazz
RESULT:
Terry told me to not contact him anymore, and that he was telling my family and the police about what I was doing. He then filed a restraining order.
Test 8
NAME: Terry
FAVORITE GENRE: Big Band Jazz
RESULT:
Terry said that the police were on the way, and that if I didn’t leave his property that he wouldn’t hesitate to defend himself.
Test 9
NAME: Rick
FAVORITE GENRE: Blues
RESULT:
Rick said that Jimi Hendrix was awesome, and also that Terry was overreacting before calling off the warrant for my arrest.
