Welcome, Dr. Memphis.
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Special Containment Procedures: Each instance of SCP-6625 is to be stored in a standard large object containment chamber, regardless of its actual size. Detailed records must be kept of each instance's changes of form.
Inter-Site transfer of SCP-6625 instances for research purposes is forbidden permitted discouraged.
Description: SCP-6625 is a blanket designation for objects possessing the following properties:
- Their physical form can spontaneously change; these changes occur roughly every 12 to 24 hours, and appear to ignore conservation of mass and related laws;
- Their 'function' (defined in broad terms) remains the same across such transformations.
The total number of SCP-6625 instances in existence is unknown, but the Foundation currently retains custody of six.
SCP-6625-1 |
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Function: Medium of communication Examples of forms: Papers and notepads (various), dry-erase whiteboard, phonograph record, semaphore flags Notes: In February of 1989, the Foundation received numerous reports regarding a potential new Group of Interest named Holt Office Supplies Ltd (GoI-6625), an anomalous stationery retailer operating from multiple locations in southwest England. Foundation agents successfully purchased a number of items from these branches, and their assorted anomalous properties were later confirmed. They included:
Shortly after these discoveries, Site-128 was established for the purposes of monitoring GoI-6625 (alongside other low-level GoI activity in the area), as well as conducting research on the anomalous items procured from it. The Site's efforts in these areas are ongoing. |
Site-128 is now fully operational, and we've made a lot of progress on studying the items we've got. Unfortunately, trying to shut this GoI down has been less successful; they seem to open a new branch every month or so, but whenever we send a team to raid one, they've completely shuttered the place by the time we get there.
Occasionally they're kind enough to leave us a note. This one, for instance, was taped to the front door of the shop we tried last week:
To our loyal customer(s),
Thank you for shopping with us! Unfortunately, we have had to cease operating at this location, on account of the fact that a bunch of obnoxious joy-suppressing control freaks are attempting to destroy our entire enterprise. We apologise for this inconvenience — however, we are happy to report that we plan to open a new store in ███████, on the 25th of ████████, ████!.Redactions in original.
See you* soon!
- Holt Office Supplies
*note: by 'you' we mean everyone who's not an agent of a soulless iron-fisted truth-suppression conspiracy organisation with more storage space than sense :)
We're obviously working on a strategy to deal with this, but the fact that they're a very new GoI means we don’t have a whole lot of operational data to go on right now.
For updates on this situation, contact my office.
Dr. Richard Sterling, Director, Site-128
27 September 1989
SCP-6625-2 |
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Function: Navigational tool Examples of forms: Magnetic compass, world atlas, GPS, inflatable globe Notes: In April 1992, a team of field agents was sent to search an abandoned public library in Warsaw, following reports of paranormal phenomena. One agent reported observing a folded map of the local area spontaneously transform into a large brass sextant; this item was recovered, and taken to Site-120 for storage and further research. Shortly after its arrival, the item's similarity to the object retrieved from Holt Office Supplies was noted; the SCP-6625 designation was subsequently established to cover both anomalies, as well as any others with similar properties that might be discovered in the future. |
We're still trying to determine how exactly this thing operates. So far as we can tell, it only ever transforms itself into things that provide some kind of navigational information. It's not always useful information, admittedly — for instance, it recently turned into a map of Istanbul, with a red dot on the Hagia Sophia labelled "YOU ARE NOT HERE" — and the fact that we have no control over its form means its utility is somewhat limited.
At any rate, we plan to continue our research into this item's properties.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Researcher, Site-120
4 April 1992
Recommending that the item be transferred to Site-128 for additional research, given that SCP-6625-1 is already in our possession.
Dr. Richard Sterling, Director, Site-128
7 April 1992
Recommending that the -1 instance instead be transferred to Site-120, as we have substantially more advanced research facilities than 128.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Researcher, Site-120
8 April 1992
I don't think this would be advisable. We know that, at minimum, instance 1 is connected to the Holt Office Supplies GoI, which currently only operates in the general vicinity of Site-128. It would be useful to determine if instance 2 has a similar connection.
Dr. Richard Sterling, Director, Site-128
8 April 1992
SCP-6625-3 |
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Function: Cleaning/purification apparatus Examples of forms: Hand soap, household vacuum cleaner, tanks of fluid used in various acroamatic abatement.The neutralization of anomalous effluence. processes Notes: In October 1997, Area-21 purchased a batch of new janitorial equipment from a company known as Herzogen Ltd. This included a vacuum cleaner, which was brought to the facility and stored in a broom closet without incident. A member of custodial staff later found the vacuum cleaner absent, with a large tank of orichalcum hyperchlorate.Standard acroamatic abatement fluid. in its place. The staff member reported this breach of proper storage procedures to their supervisor; the tank was collected and moved to its proper location, but transformed into a dustpan and brush while in transit. The item was subsequently designated SCP-6625-3, and stored in permanent containment on-Site. |
Needless to say, an investigation has been opened into this Herzogen company. The fact that they appear to be selling anomalous goods is bad enough; the fact that they sold this item specifically to the Foundation's oldest AcroAbate facility is being treated as a potential information security breach.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
12 October 1997
Considering the similarities to the acquisition of 6625-1, I think it's worth investigating any possible connections between this item and Holt Office Supplies.
Dr. Richard Sterling, Director, Site-128
13 October 1997
Good idea. Can you get someone at your Site to send us whatever info you have about that company, and we'll look through it?
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
14 October 1997
I can work on that. In the meantime, I'm wondering if there are research opportunities to be found in transferring this item to the area where HOS is currently operating.
Dr. Richard Sterling, Director, Site-128
14 October 1997
None that I can see.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
14 October 1997
SCP-6625-4 |
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Function: [REDACTED] Examples of forms: [REDACTED] Notes: Acquired by Site-106 Procurement and Liquidation in 2001. Currently in custody of Site-17 Area-162 Site-19 [REDACTED]. |
This isn't helpful.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
11 March 2002
Object Class of SCP-6625 has been updated to Keter.
[REDACTED], Containment Specialist, [REDACTED]
23 July 2002
Would anyone care to explain why?
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
26 July 2002
Noting that everyone who has access to this file also has access to the supplementary document that explains what instance -4 is. This has no reason to be marked as redacted.
Dr. Richard Sterling, Director, Site-128
28 July 2002
For reference, the supplementary document that Dr. Sterling is referring to contains the following summary:
SCP-6625-4
Function: Weapon
Examples of forms: Conventional firearms (various), longbow, kitchen knife, explosive devices (various)
Noel Burgum, Head of Sourcing & Containment, Site-106
30 July 2002
Why are we trying to obscure the fact that this thing can turn into a bomb? That seems like important information to include in the main file.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
1 August 2002
Agreed. Removed the relevant redactions, since none of the info under them is actually restricted. I'd like to know why they were there in the first place.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
1 August 2002
Maybe whoever's got the thing right now thinks they'll have better luck getting rid of it if nobody knows what it is.
Dr. Richard Sterling, Director, Site-128
1 August 2002
Also, this is clearly not Keter. There is a full year's worth of data recorded for this item, and at no point in that time has it transformed into anything that could do any kind of damage without human usage or intervention. Changed containment class back to Euclid.
Dr. Richard Sterling, Director, Site-128
1 August 2002
Reverted containment class to Keter, and restored redactions.
[REDACTED], Containment Specialist, [REDACTED]
2 August 2002
WHY
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
3 August 2002
Noting, again, that the nature of SCP-6625-4 is classified Level 3, and the SCP-6625 file as a whole is also classified Level 3. There is no-one to redact this information from, and you are doing nothing but making everyone else's jobs harder.
Also noting, again, that the potential for an item to do harm is unrelated to containment difficulty, and the Keter designation should not be applied lightly.
If this abuse of the database entry persists, I may move to have the item transferred to a facility that is better-equipped to handle and document it. Please restore these changes, or provide a convincing reason not to do so.
Dr. Richard Sterling, Director, Site-128
3 August 2002
The matter is under my purview, and the matter is closed.
[REDACTED], Containment Specialist, [REDACTED]
7 August 2002
SCP-6625-5 |
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Function: [unclear] Examples of forms: Tuning fork, vanilla extract bottle, engagement ring, first-edition copy of Gödel, Escher, Bach by Douglas Hofstatder Notes: In February 2006, a large package was delivered to Site-54 in Leipzig; this package was found to contain a stone sculpture resembling a gargoyle. Research conducted on the item found similarities to SCP-6625-1, -2, -3 and -4; it would periodically change its form without any apparent input or trigger, with intervals typically between 12 and 24 hours. A notable difference, however, was that no discernable pattern between its various appearances could be ascertained. In spite of this, the object was tentatively classified SCP-6625-5. Efforts to identify the sender of the package were inconclusive. |
I have received protests from multiple staff over the addition of this item to the SCP-6625 file. I disagree, for the record — I think the phenomenological similarities are too great for the idea of a relationship between this instance and the others to be discarded — but they do raise an important point. The fact that 6625-5 so clearly defies our expectation of a 'constant function' means one of two things: either our expectation is wrong, or our idea of what constitutes a 'constant function' is insufficiently nuanced.
We do not, at this point, have the ability to say.
Dr. Samira Golzar, Head of Research, Site-54
9 April 2006
I'm calling bullshit on this one. The description clearly states that SCP-6625 instances have two defining properties, and this item is outright failing to meet one of them. Not an instance. Give it its own SCP designation, or put it on the minor anomalous items list.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
10 April 2006
Did you actually read any part of my previous note? The spontaneous transformations match those of the other instances near-perfectly; even the time intervals seem to have the same statistical distribution. Either we're wrong about how we're defining 'function', or we've got a totally unrelated object that just happens to spontaneously change shape in the exact same manner as these other four. I find the first one vastly more likely.
Dr. Samira Golzar, Head of Research, Site-54
10 April 2006
Do you have a better definition of 'function' that you'd like us all to start using?
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
10 April 2006
Not as of yet, but we've only had this thing for two months. Research takes time.
Dr. Samira Golzar, Head of Research, Site-54
10 April 2006
What if the item takes its transformational cues from its current location? Area-21 does acroamatic abatement, so they got a tank of abatement fluid. Site-17 is basically designed to give the Ethics Committee a migraine, so they got a potentially highly dangerous weapon. Following that pattern, it makes sense for Site-54 to get an item with the general theme of 'chaos'.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
11 April 2006
Actually not a bad theory.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
12 April 2006
It's an extremely bad theory. We're not chaotic.
Dr. Samira Golzar, Head of Research, Site-54
12 April 2006
Maybe you could send it to 128 and see if anything changes. I'm sure Sterling would absolutely love to have it.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
12 April 2006
Dr. Sterling may have difficulty requisitioning this item, given that he died two years ago. Thank you for your consideration regardless.
Dr. Marie Bradley, Director, Site-128
14 April 2006
Also, what's this about "delivered to Site-54"? By who? Did some random person just walk up to the gates with it and say "hey, this seems like the kind of thing you're into"?
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
15 April 2006
I think you're joking, but that's actually not far off. As far as our cameras can tell, someone literally threw it over the wall and ran away.
Dr. Samira Golzar, Head of Research, Site-54
15 April 2006
But sure, you're not the chaos Site.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
15 April 2006
It sounds as though you have a security problem.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
16 April 2006
Yes, obviously it's a security problem. We're working on it.
Dr. Samira Golzar, Head of Research, Site-54
16 April 2006
SCP-6625-6 |
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Function: Ignition agent Examples of forms: Box of matches, cigarette lighter, explosive devices (various) Notes: Acquired by Site-106 Procurement and Liquidation in 2009, and remains in the custody of this facility. |
Oh, great. Two things that can turn into bombs. Maybe someone's trying to send us a message.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
18 March 2009
We bought these things from two different people at two different garage sales in completely different parts of the United States, eight years apart. If this is someone sending a message, they've got a funny way of doing it.
Noel Burgum, Head of Sourcing & Containment, Site-106
20 March 2009
How come this one's safe to keep at 106's warehouse, but the other one wasn't?
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
21 March 2009
We didn't get rid of the weapon one because it was unsafe, we got rid of it because 17 asked us to transfer it to them.
Noel Burgum, Head of Sourcing & Containment, Site-106
21 March 2009
"Sending anomalous weaponry to Site-17 because they asked nicely for it" might be the single worst policy I've ever heard.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
21 March 2009
106 isn't really a research site, so we figured it made sense to send the thing somewhere that was. Not our fault they decided to blackbox the entire entry.
Speaking of research, are there any updates from any other Sites on this file?
Noel Burgum, Head of Sourcing & Containment, Site-106
21 March 2009
We've got plenty of data, but still very little understanding of why these things do what they do, or where they came from. Holt Office Supplies and Herzogen Ltd. don't actually exist any more, either — they shut down completely in '04 and '08 respectively.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
21 March 2009
Not long after we discovered instance -2, we found that it gives off really weird Hume readings (there's a supplementary report attached to this file), but we're fairly sure that's just a side effect of its properties. As for the items' origin, though, we've got nothing.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
23 March 2009
Yeah, we ran the same Hume tests on our instance and got pretty similar results.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
23 March 2009
So did we. Is that enough proof that -5 is actually a 6625 instance and not just an unrelated item with vaguely similar properties, Zach?
Dr. Samira Golzar, Head of Research, Site-54
24 March 2009
Still not convinced. If it's just a side effect of the properties like Kaufmann thinks, then an unrelated item would give the same readings.
What about the other instances? 106, 128, and whoever the hell has the weapon one right now?
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
25 March 2009
I don't think Site-106 actually has a working Hume meter.
Noel Burgum, Head of Sourcing & Containment, Site-106
27 March 2009
1) It's called a Kant counter, and 2) how the hell do you not have one?
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
27 March 2009
We don't appear to have that data on file, and at any rate 6625 isn't a high research priority for us right now.
Dr. Marie Bradley, Director, Site-128
28 March 2009
You don't have any high research priorities. Site-128 was set up to monitor a GoI that literally doesn't exist any more, and it's got a grand total of twelve research staff.
Dr. Samira Golzar, Head of Research, Site-54
28 March 2009
Echoing my previous recommendation that 6625-1 be transferred to Site-120 for further study.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
28 March 2009
Who changed the Object Class to Euclid? Reverting it to Keter.
[REDACTED], Containment Specialist, [REDACTED]
30 March 2009
IT'S NOT KETER. Show me the operational data that says we can't just lock it in a big box and leave it alone. Show me the records of it ever becoming animate or autonomous.
Reverted to Euclid, and honestly there's a good case for it being Safe.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
30 March 2009
So just to confirm: we know about as much about the actual origin of these things as we did twenty years ago?
Noel Burgum, Head of Sourcing & Containment, Site-106
31 March 2009
Yes, and I'll remind you that you've been involved for eight of those years.
Dr. Samira Golzar, Head of Research, Site-54
2 April 2009
Not really "involved". We had instance 4 in containment at 106 for less than a week. Again, we're not a research site.
Noel Burgum, Head of Sourcing & Containment, Site-106
3 April 2009
Then why are you in the researcher comments?
Dr. Samira Golzar, Head of Research, Site-54
3 April 2009
If 106 is not a research site, would it be willing to transfer this new instance to a facility that actually is one?
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
4 April 2009
If you wanted to send it to us, we'd be open to that.
[REDACTED], Containment Specialist, [REDACTED]
4 April 2009
Send it where? I don't know where Site-Redacted is.
Noel Burgum, Head of Sourcing & Containment, Site-106
5 April 2009
If you're going to send it anywhere at all, I'd recommend us. Area-21's not intended to deal with this kind of anomaly, 128 is useless, 54 is a disaster factory, and for all we know Dr. Redacted could be employed on the Moon.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
5 April 2009
We've been successfully containing 6625-3 for the last twelve years. But sure, we're "not intended to deal with this kind of anomaly".
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
6 April 2009
I'm just saying, you're primarily an AcroAbate Site, not a research Site.
Dr. Mark Kaufmann, Research Lead, Site-120
6 April 2009
And you're primarily a wizard tower, not a containment facility.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
6 April 2009
Is this discourse helping?
Noel Burgum, Head of Sourcing & Containment, Site-106
7 April 2009
Nothing is helping, Noel. Nobody's made any meaningful progress on these damn things in two decades, and the more of them we find, the less we understand them. No-one's got a fucking clue, because it turns out that trying to coordinate a research project between an Austrian chemical plant, a Floridian warehouse, a bunch of thaumaturges in Poland, a garden shed in the English countryside, an imminent catastrophe in the shape of an R&C site, and a mystery-box facility with a giant crate of black redaction markers, doesn't actually fucking work.
Dr. Zachary Lucero, Senior Researcher, Area-21
7 April 2009
Okay, I have questions. First off, who is the researcher of note on this item?
Dr. Oliver Memphis, Acting Director, Site-128
5 August 2016
Hello? Is anyone here?
Dr. Oliver Memphis, Acting Director, Site-128
7 August 2016
Alright, fine. Let the record show that I'm only editing this file without permission because I have absolutely no idea who I'm supposed to get permission from.
Dr. Oliver Memphis, Acting Director, Site-128
10 August 2016
Update: On 3 August 2016, SCP-6625-1 was destroyed in an attack on Site-128. Its last known form was a blank notebook; it is believed to have been neutralised by an incendiary bomb.
A subsequent Overwatch review recommended the immediate closure of Site-128, citing:
- The prohibitive cost of repairing the building after the attack;
- The general inadequacy of the Site's security measures and other equipment;
- The complete lack of any notable research conducted or published by the Site since 2008;
Decommissioning of the facility is ongoing.
Everything about this is a clusterfuck.
Dr. Oliver Memphis, Acting Director, Site-128
10 August 2016