SCP-6368

rating: +141+x
chrisheathers.jpg

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Item#: 6368
Level3
Containment Class:
esoteric
Secondary Class:
thaumiel
Disruption Class:
dark
Risk Class:
notice

Special Containment Procedures:

SCP-6368 is to remain employed by the Foundation within the Department of the Departed. Quarterly interviews, framed as performance reviews, are scheduled to track efficacy of the cover story and containment procedures. The Department must continue to employ analogue archival of documents to ensure SCP-6368 is able to fulfil his responsibilities to the best of his ability. SCP-6368 must not be informed of his SCP status, nor of his death.


secretaryheathersblue.jpg

SCP-6368 causes significant interference when captured by security camera, 2002

Description:

SCP-6368 is the spirit of Secretary Christopher Heathers who, having died while working at Site-59, remained earthbound beyond death as a semi-corporeal eidolon-class phantasm.1 The anomaly, being semi-corporeal, is capable of interacting with the physical world, but is intangible to living and animate matter.

SCP-6368 has existed in this form since his death in 1957, recorded in Event Log 6368.1:


Event Log 6368.1


DATE: 1957/06/16

– BEGIN LOG –

22:45:52: Secretary Heathers is re-organizing documents in the Chimerical Hauntings2 section of the departmental archives.

22:47:20: Heathers takes a file, CH-1938-RH, from its place.

22:47:49: After reading the file’s title, Heathers continues along the aisle.

22:48:52: Secretary Heathers’ shoelaces have come untied. He steps on them, tripping over. Heathers falls forwards, dropping the file. After colliding head-first with the hardwood floor, Heathers ceases movement.

Eight minutes of inactivity excised.

22:56:07: A faint glow emanates from the body of Secretary Heathers, indicating SCP-6368 has formed. As the phantasm is identical to the dead employee, his presence becomes properly evident when he begins to move.

22:56:37: SCP-6368 blinks, then raises his head, looking around. He appears transparent on security footage, and the aura surrounding him does not illuminate his environment.

22:57:14: The anomaly rises from his supine position, and begins searching the floor for File CH-1938-RH, unsuccessfully. SCP-6368’s movements are slow, but precise.

23:02:29: SCP-6368 ceases his search, and continues filing documents. While he is able to interact with the files, he has passed through his body without issue numerous times. He appears unable to notice his own corpse.

23:27:48: With documents adequately organized, SCP-6368 leaves the Chimerical Hauntings section, returning to his desk.

– END OF LOG –


Secretary Heathers’ death occurred late at night on a Sunday, in an area of low activity. His death, therefore, was not noticed before SCP-6368 returned to his desk. The discovery of SCP-6368’s identity as a post-mortal apparition occurred by chance the next morning, as recorded in Event Log 6368.2:


Event Log 6368.2


DATE, TIME: 1957/06/17, 07:34

– BEGIN LOG –

[SCP-6368 is at his desk in the reception of the Department of the Departed, organising intradepartmental events for July. He has been working since returning to his desk before midnight, and shows no signs of fatigue. Agent Dinah McLean steps out of the reception’s elevator. SCP-6368 stands to greet her.]

McLean: Morning, Chris.

SCP-6368: Morning. Got your latest report?

McLean: Right here! How was your weekend?

SCP-6368: I’ve been organising the archives: first chronologically, then alphabetically, now a unique hybrid of the two systems. Riveting stuff!

[Agent McLean laughs.]

SCP-6368: I’m not kidding. I started by wondering whether it’d be better to have files be ordered according to when the Department first identified them as phantasmagoric events, or according to when the first known haunting occurred. It may sound like a meaningless change but it’d really affect how we file away our medieval case fil–

McLean: Well, that does sound like a lot of fun. Really. I’ve got to dash to a meeting. It’s on, uh, poltergeist retrieval. Don’t work yourself too hard!

[McLean hands SCP-6368 her report, and attempts to pat him on the back. Her hand passes through the anomaly.]

McLean: I– Wait. You–

SCP-6368: Thanks! I do try to keep a strict timetable of work and play, of course it’s very important not to spend too much time or effort on either of the two.

[McLean moves her hand through SCP-6368. He does not appear to notice.]

McLean: You’re a– I just–

SCP-6368: Though, recently I’ve been feeling particularly energised so I’ve felt comfortable pushing myself to get all my work done long before it’s–

McLean: Chris? I think you–

SCP-6368: –needed, though at the same time you may well be right, I’ve had a splitting headache all morning, of course that’s just the sort of thing you have to push through if you want to be proud of your work, and being proud of what you and I and all the rest of us are doing here is really what gets me up in the morning, or at least most mornings, I didn’t catch any sleep last night, far too busy with all the filing and such, so perhaps it’d be better to say it’s what keeps me going through the small hours of the mor– Dinah? Are you feeling okay? You’ve gone pale as anything.

[Agent McLean activates a silent alarm button, located on the underside of Secretary Heathers’ desk.]

McLean: You know what? I’m doing alright. Perfect. How are you? You feeling okay? Why don’t we just… let’s just chat for a second.

SCP-6368: I’m… I’m fine. Are you sure you’re not feeling under the weather? You mentioned a meeting you had to get to?

McLean: That– That can wait. I’d like to, uh, hear more about this filing you’ve been doing. You said it was chronological?

SCP-6368: Semi-chronological. Like I was saying: I thought organising by chronological date of inception could be very beneficial for research into historical hauntings, and the like, but then I stopped myself, thinking “Chris, you dolt! You’ve forgotten all about the possibility of retrocausal hauntings!” [He laughs.] How do you forget a thing like that? Am I right?

McLean: [She laughs, weakly.] Yes, yes of course. That was silly.

Four minutes of extraneous dialogue excised.

[Mobile Task Force Beta-00 (“Team Spirit”) storms the reception, responding to the silent alarm. Following standard procedure, MTF Beta-00 instruct Agent McLean and SCP-6368 to assume the safety position, citing a local containment breach. The two comply.]

[Noting SCP-6368’s intangibility, the task force applies preliminary apparition containment procedures to McLean and SCP-6368. SCP-6368 appears largely unfazed, and continues to describe his filing system to both Agent McLean and members of β-00 while being escorted to a containment cell.]

– END OF LOG –


Agent McLean was discharged from containment and lauded for her handling of the situation. SCP-6368 remained in containment, under the impression that a breach had occurred, until the current procedures were devised.


chrisheathers.jpg

Secretary Heathers, photographed prior to his death.

Eidolon-class entities exhibit qualities congruent with the opinions held of them at the point of death. As such, SCP-6368 remains well-organised, acutely aware of the practices of the Department of the Departed, and highly capable when performing secretarial duties. As evidenced in Event Log 6368.2, eidolon-class entities can be difficult to identify in person without physical interaction: upon reviewing the event logs, Agent McLean reported SCP-6368’s translucency to be much more noticeable on camera than in-person.3

Due to SCP-6368’s aptitude for his deceased counterpart’s responsibilities, the Department has elected to retain SCP-6368 under his pre-existing contract. SCP-6368 is presently unaware of any irregularities of his situation, as it has been deemed impractical to provide the anomaly with information pertaining to his death. SCP-6368 has been provided with a cover story: during the supposed breach of 1957/06/17, he was contaminated with an unknown (but stable) anomaly, and thus should avoid contact with living beings. An alternate event log, reporting the aforementioned circumstances, was provided for SCP-6368 to read.

In a performance review one year following SCP-6368’s death, Site Director Andersen stated Secretary Heathers’ performance was “flawless”, noting his vast knowledge, his willingness to perform menial tasks without issue or complaint, and the fact that he did not require rest, recuperation, or vacation time.


Addendum 6368.1: Anti-Digitization & Apparition Preservation Efforts.

On 1984/01/01, during the preliminary stage of digitizing the Department of the Departed’s archives,4 it was discovered that SCP-6368 has great difficulty interacting directly with electrical devices, ostensibly due to their “animate” nature.5 A cost-benefit analysis – pitting modernising the Department against continual reliance on SCP-6368 for record-keeping, organization, and administration – found Secretary Heathers’ position within the Foundation to be nigh-irreplaceable. In addition to halting the digitization efforts, the recently-appointed Site Director Mathis ordered an update to containment procedures: regular interviews, both to ensure SCP-6368 was not likely to discover his nature as a post-mortal entity, and to identify any adjustments required to ensure he remains earthbound. These interviews have been successful but largely inconclusive. A sample is provided below:


Autumn ‘Performance Review’, 1992


DATE: 1992/11/01
Agent Arthur Reilly has been interviewing SCP-6368 for 45 minutes, and is close to conclusion. The discussion has not strayed far from Heathers’ secretarial duties.

– BEGIN LOG SEGMENT –

SCP-6368: In many ways, you know, I consider it a hobby, too.

Reilly: You do?

SCP-6368: Yes! I get plenty of satisfaction from what I do here. Working for the Department– With the department. Some days I’m filing documents, other days I’m filing interviews. I never know what I’ll be doing next.

Reilly: But mostly filing.

SCP-6368: Mostly filing, yes. And sometimes scheduling. And correspondences, all that. But even then, the types of things I read about in my job, it feels like the world will never run out of oddities.

Reilly: I’m sure. So, the past fifty or so years, they’ve been good to you?

SCP-6368: Stunningly so! The first decade was somewhat rocky, but since that breach in the fifties, I’ve had energy like nothing else.

Reilly: And there’s nothing the Department could do to improve your… “quality of life”?

SCP-6368: Have you been looking into a cure for my condition? I understand it’s for the good of the Site, but I haven’t touched a person in… well, decades, I suppose. It’s not easy.

Reilly: I can assure you, we’re doing our best, and you have my sympathy. Nothing’s come up yet, but we haven’t given up hope, and neither should you.

SCP-6368: I understand.

[Silence on recording]

SCP-6368: I should get back to work. The transcript for the latest departmental seminar still hasn’t been edited. It’s a good one too, were you there for it?

Reilly: I was busy, sorry. But you’re right, I think we can call this a successful review. If you’re ready, feel free to make your way back to–

SCP-6368: Doctor Holvig spoke about the necessity for identify verification during vague-haunting scenarios. It was rather inspiring. Plenty of DoD field agents, I’m sure, neglect to ascertain all the facts when writing a report of a minor haunting. Just because the ghost you've encountered isn't possessing farmyard animals, or daubing walls in blood, it doesn't mean you can spare some detail!

[Agent Reilly sighs.]

SCP-6368: I don’t mean to tell you how to do your job, of course, far from it. I’m sure you’re very thorough. It just makes record-keeping difficult for folks like me, the grunts. I had one file the other week: no victim name, no entity classification, nothing. The agent marked the incident as “a trick of the light.” A trick of the light. I’m sure I’m not alone in finding that a little detail-light, am I? Hardly the sor–

[The recording cuts. Agent Reilly has terminated the interview.]

– END OF LOG –



Throughout all quarterly interviews, SCP-6368 has never indicated any significant discomfort with his position, and there has been no indication that the post-mortal apparition will dispel himself without significant cause. SCP-6368 frequently requests updates on the project to rid him of the contamination he believes necessitates his physical isolation. Should he repeat this request, he is to be told that progress is being made, slowly. Under no circumstances should he be allowed to lose hope in this process; it is thought that this hope may be tethering him to the mortal plane.


Update: 2005/03/09

After a meta-analytical review of the “unfinished business” cause of post-mortal tethering was published within the anomalous science community,6 containment specialists planned a novel series of interviews with SCP-6368. These interviews were intended to identify any major life milestones, or significant goals Secretary Heathers had had in his life, but had not attained at the point of death. Any progress towards these goals could result in the demanifestation of SCP-6368, thus it was in the interests of the Foundation to identify – and obstruct – such progress, to ensure the maintenance of the Department of the Departed’s infrastructure.

The first three of these interviews occurred without incident, finding no outstanding life goals in Christopher Heathers’ personal relationships, no unfulfilled wishes within his hobbies or pastimes, and no desires relating to national or international sightseeing. The fourth, however, was focused on his professional career goals, and resulted in an unexpected outcome. The relevant portion of this interview is presented in Event Log 6368.3:


Event Log 6368.3


DATE: 2005/03/08
Foreword: Operative Anna Purdie has been interviewing SCP-6368 for 20 minutes. Thus far, no desires to experience other fields of work have been identified; Secretary Heathers was happy with his largely-sedentary employment.

– BEGIN LOG SEGMENT –

SCP-6368: So no, I was never really up for any action. And I certainly wouldn’t be now, not at my age!

Purdie: Sure, I understand. We should be able to wrap up soon, just a few more pages left on this questionnaire.

SCP-6368: Don’t worry about me, I’m happy to keep going.

Purdie: I’m sure. Let’s move on, anyway. Did you ever get passed up for a promotion? Did you ever feel your superiors were undeserving of their position?

SCP-6368: Well, not particularly, no. I’ve felt I’ve performed my duties well. I’m living quite comfortably. Sure, I’ve seen a few yuppies climb the ladder, right past me, but it doesn’t bother me. I’m here to help my colleagues, not hinder them, you dig?

Purdie: Sure. I… dig. So let me get this straight: in your sixty-odd years of employment within the Department of the Departed, you’ve never felt professionally slighted?

SCP-6368: I suppose I did miss something out, but it’s really nothing. Just a hunch I’ve been holding onto far too long.

Purdie: Go on.

SCP-6368: I’ve been around for a while. I’ve seen this department go through a lot. Three board reshuffles, two new directors, uncountable scientific discoveries… and I’ve never been promoted, relocated, commended… Nothing. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining, just find it odd. Unlikely.

Purdie: What’s your point?

SCP-6368: Maybe I jinxed myself. Let me give you an example. Back in the fifties, ‘round the time of that breach? The one that’s got me all tainted with God-knows-what? The night before, I was working on a new filing system; first I tried chronological, then–

Purdie: I’ve reviewed the report, I’m aware of that re-organization attempt.

SCP-6368: Alright, alright. After we got the Site back under control after the breach, I went back to finish the reorganisation, and changed the whole thing. You see, I’d dropped a file the day before, and it made me realize that the sys–

Purdie: Is that file CH-1938-RH?

SCP-6368: That’s right! That’s the one! I couldn’t find it where I dropped it, the next day. It was just gone. And looking for it made me realize–

Purdie: Oh, don’t worry about that. Like I said, I’ve been reading the reports of that incident. They found the file: it’d slipped underneath one of the shelving units and got all dusty, so the folks who were cleaning the site where you… uh, fell… they took it away to clean it up.

SCP-6368: You found the file? That’s good! So my theory on the matter is– oh. [He pauses.] That’s changed things a little.

[SCP-6368’s skin glows brighter, becoming incandescent.]

SCP-6368: I was more than a pencil-pusher, Anna. I did have a life. Did no-one care?

Purdie: What?

SCP-6368: The way you all remembered me, it’s hurtful. Things are a lot clearer now. I’m through.

Purdie: You’re… You’re through?

[Silence on recording. SCP-6368’s hair wafts, caught by gusts of wind. His skin glows brighter.]

Purdie: You’re passing on? Because of a file?

SCP-6368: Isn’t it wonderful?

Purdie: Fifty years of un-death over a fucking document. You are shitting me, Chris!

[The wind surrounding SCP-6368 picks up speed.]

SCP-6368: Please, Anna. I am at peace now. Besides, I wasn’t shitting you. I haven’t done that in–

[Heathers is speaking, but his words are inaudible over the wind. He continues to glow brighter. Operative Purdie shields her eyes. The security camera is unable to adapt to the brightness.]

[Thirty seconds later, the whiteout fades. Operative Purdie is alone in the interview room.]

Purdie: Fuck.

– END OF LOG –



Reclassification to Neutralized pending, to be completed alongside large-scale modernisation of the DoD’s administration, organisation, communications, and over 80 years of archival data stored at Site-59. All agents not on active duty have been reassigned to secretarial duties for the remainder of this effort.


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