SCP-5804
rating: +16+x
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The very first image of SCP-5804-B and SCP-5804-C (censored) captured by Voyager 1 in 1982.

Item #: SCP-5804

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: Local newspapers from the ██████ municipality of Namibia must be monitored for mentions of SCP-5804-A. Any suspicious publication must be censored and the publishers interrogated. The Hane people are to continue to practice their faith unimpeded.

As human spacecraft seldom visits SCP-5804-B and -C, no containment procedures are currently implemented. Should any space agency plan such an encounter, embedded Foundation agents are to gain access to the spacecraft before launch and fit it with an S-Mute module designed to induce a failure of the communication systems.

Description: SCP-5804-A is a monotheistic religion traditionally practiced by the Hane1 people of Namibia. It follows a calendar divided into cycles of exactly 54 years and 6 months. At the end of each cycle, a ceremony is organized which culminates in the sacrifice of a deceased elder's skull in honor of the deity. The first documented sacrifice took place in 1584 and the latest in 2016, with an exception in 1962 as the Hane failed to sacrifice a skull.

SCP-5804-B is a comet orbiting the sun with a period of 54 years and 6 months. Upon reaching perihelion, a human skull materializes a few hundred meters above the surface before slowly falling towards the object. There are currently [REDACTED] skulls visible on the surface. So far, every perihelion saw the fall of a skull, with the notable exception of the 1962 perihelion.

SCP-5804-C is a human penis orbiting SCP-5804-B at an altitude of 1.3 km. The object has been deteriorated by solar wind and cannot be further analyzed. SCP-5804-C was discovered in 1982, but was already in dire condition at this time. Since 1954 observations of the comet by the Foundation showed no anomaly, SCP-5804-C appeared some time between 1954 and 1982, possibly in 1962 in correlation with a failed Hane ceremony and the absence of a skull above SCP-5804-B.

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A Hane priest during a ceremony. it is believed the mask visible on the picture is a personification of SCP-5804-B.

The general timeline of an SCP-5804-A ceremony is as follows:

  • The Hane decorate the streets of their villages as they wait for rainfall. An altar is assembled.
  • As the sun sets, young adults and children begin dancing and chanting while the elders consume Ru, an alcoholic beverage made from yeast and barley.
  • The Head Priest carries the skull of a chosen elder to the altar as well as a decorated iron axe called a Tela.
  • As the drinking and dancing continues, the Head Priest recites a prayer while swinging the axe. A black, circular artifact of unidentified nature appears on the surface of the altar.
  • The Head Priest pushes the skull into the artifact. The artifact disappears as the Hane cheer. At this point, a new skull appears above SCP-5804-B.
  • When the rain stops, flower petals are set alight and thrown into the air. The rising heat carries them up in glowing plumes.

It is believed the Hane had no means of observing outer space before the 19th century. The source of their knowledge of SCP-5804-B's period remains unidentified.

Addendum: In 2015, the Hane people entrusted Foundation agents with a journal written by Belgian explorer Charles Karneau, which may explain the origin of SCP-5804-C. Below are selected excerpts of the journals.

Date: October 12th, 1962

Today marks the beginning of the Karneau adventure into the South West African jungle. Generously sponsored by the Maquerot family after acquiring great wealth from their enterprises in the Belgian Congo, this journey into the wild and savage Deep Green will unveil countless wonders: birds, flowers, or even apes, with any luck. I will immortalize all of these magnificent forms with my newest camera.

Participants will include Charles Karneau — myself, my wonderful wife Julie, our two sons, Thomas and David, as well as a long term family friend and his wife, Victor and Clara Alloniers, whose daughters Eugénie and Laure will also participate. Four experienced guides will protect us against the dangers of the wilderness.

May God bless us with the sight of a thousand wonders.

Date: October 20th, 1962

Today will forever be a cursed day for the Karneau family.

After a day of rough trekking, it was decided to set up camp for an evening of leisure. The children were playing around the dinner table while my wife and I enjoyed a beer with Victor and Clara. The children wanted to play with the guides' rifles; we gave in, and a rifle was unloaded and given to them, despite the guides' protestations. However, as they swung it energetically, a phenomenon manifested. It was an ominously dark circle placed on the ground. I shamefully admit that I and the other three adults had ingested too much beer to correctly deal with the unknown occurrence.

Later in the night, after regaining our intelligence, we were woken up by a scream. We ran out of the tents, to see Victor kneeling where the artifact would have been situated, clutching his nether regions. Laure told us about the artifact, and Victor confessed that, still inhebriated and riddled with curiosity, he tried to insert his virile member into it.

Victor was given ether so he could ignore the pain while the guides disinfected the wound. The journey was ended prematurely and after a short night, we began trekking back to the edge of the jungle.

This misfortune shall serve as testimony of the cruelty of the jungle.

Date: October 21st, 1962

After leaving the forest, we witnessed a spectacular occurrence. Large plumes of luminescent orange matter rose to the skies and illuminated the night. To this day, I do not know whether these were insects, or some unknown southern aurora.

A few days ago, I would have opened my mouth to such a sight. Now, it is undoubtedly a warning to never come again. The jungle has a soul; it is a animal. Leashed to a pole, it will bite all who come close.

Addendum: Interview of a Hane elder about the failed ceremony of 1962.

Interviewer: Dr Vicat
Interviewee: Mane Tenehara, Hane elder
Date: 2017/12/12


Dr Vicat: Thank you for your time. Let us begin with a recount of the events.

Mane Tenehara: I remember that day very fondly. A euphoric folly had awaken in the villagers' hearts. A sparkle of light and joy which signified that finally, it was time again to satisfy the Empress of Light. As the rain wet the soil of the village roads, the innocent began agitating their bodies furiously while the wise sipped the Drink of the Dreamers. As I was dancing, I witnessed the Head Priest come out of his house, the beautiful Tela in one hand, and in the other, the terrifying remains of an elder whose tale had long been drowned in Ru.

As he chanted, and swung the Tela with great energy, the villagers waited for the Dheta to appear, as was foretold by the prophecy, and for the Head Priest to push the elder's skull into the soul of the Empress of Light. Alas, as he wielded the Tela with greater force and chanted with greater assurance, nothing happened. Eventually, under the curious stares of many youngsters, he abandoned.

No one among the innocents knew what should happen next. The prophecy was supposed to be accomplished, without fail. However, since the elders had already drowned their souls in Ru, it was decided that the dancing would continue until further instructions. Those never came; flower petals were set alight and released in beautiful warm auroras. The next day, the innocent woke up with wonderful memories, and the elders, with an unforgettable headache. To this day, I still wonder if they ever knew that the ceremony failed.

Dr Vicat: What could have possibly gone wrong? Was it the Head Priest's fault?

Mane Tenehara: I do not believe so. It is foretold that anyone in the land of the Hane, who wields an iron weapon while the young dance and the elders drink a beverage of yeast and barley, can summon the Soul of the Empress of Light. No, I believe someone opened the Dheta before we had the chance; it can only happen once every 54 years. No more than that.

Dr Vicat: So if, say, people who happened to be nearby accidentally created those conditions, then inserted a male body part into the "Dheta"… then…

Mane Tenehara: (Chuckles) If I have to be completely honest, this is a haunting question for every Hane man.

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