All instances of SCP-4907 prior to their containment.
Item #: SCP-4907
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: All instances of SCP-4907 are to be stored within standard containment lockers. Any and all Foundation personnel may request to be exposed to an instance of SCP-4907 for personal reasons or otherwise.
Description: SCP-4907 is the collective designation for three ceramic lawn gnomes. Physically, all instances of SCP-4907 are identical to non-anomalous lawn gnomes.
SCP-4907's anomalous effects occur after a sapient subject has been within five meters of at least one SCP-4907 instance for at least ten minutes. After the subject leaves the proximity of the SCP-4907 instance, a single folded piece of paper will appear in a location related to the subject, typically their pocket, desk, or some other location the subject checks frequently. Written on the paper will be a single Shakespearean-style sonnet about the subject, describing them in a matter that the subject would find flattering.
SCP-4907 instances show a certain level of omniscience in regards to exposed subjects, and often incorporate certain specific details about subjects' lives in each poem. Each poem to date is unique, and there is currently no known limit to the amount of poems a single subject may receive if exposed to an SCP-4907 instance repeatedly.
Subjects who read poems created by an SCP-4907 instance will typically report feeling happier, more confident, and less stressed about personal problems. Whether this effect is anomalous or otherwise is inconclusive.
Below is a list of example poems gathered from experiments with SCP-4907 instances.
Recipient: Researcher Harold Barnaby
So brilliant, majestic, Barnaby
His intellect can never quite be matched
So many men wish that they could be he
Adoring fans they cling, they are attached.His genius mind, his excellent rapport
Quite humble 'bout it all, he's quite the man
His only care is goodness, he adores
The idea of doing what he can.This modern hero, mythical and wise
Oh Doctor Harold Barnaby, it's true
There is no man with brain or heart your size
Not one person on Earth as great as you.Though some things were embellished several ways
You honestly deserve to hear some praise.
Recipient: Francis Paloma, Site-22 Janitor
When poppa comes on home, everyone
Will squeal with glee their daddy's finally here
Three growing girls, one tiny baby son
And certainly his loving wife will cheer.In tiredness, good poppa still does play
With dolls and cars and other fancy toys
He always makes good time for every day
If forced to choose, family is his choice.Now fifteen years a happy married man
His wife is luckier than she will know
He cries knowing no moment sweeter than
The day they married, seems not long ago.Though dangerous your job may seem to be
You'll always have your loving family.
Recipient: D-39985
There ain't no walls that keep this fire down!
There ain't no ceiling stifling her fight!
There ain't no nails sticking her to the ground!
There ain't no way she'll never see the light!A warrior, a true and righteous lass!
Her blood boils over, anxious to be free!
Her kicks are strong, and she will kick your ass!
The time will come when she'll rule SCP!To be the best? She's already got that.
To challenge her would be the plight of fools.
Ain't no one better than this coolest cat!
Patricia reigns! Patricia Walters rules!Don't give up hope, just keep your fight alive
Cooperate for now and you'll survive.Note: Despite the message endorsing D-39985 to forcefully break free of her confinement, she has since been significantly more cooperative and docile compared to before exposure to the SCP-4907 instance.
Addendum: During an experiment regarding repeated exposure to SCP-4907 instances, the following note manifested in place of the standard Shakespearean sonnet.
Recipient: Researcher Leo Holt
Please don't die tonight.
We know that this is breaking character, but we couldn't just hold this in.
You've been looking for a sign for what to do.
Consider this your sign.
After reading the note, Researcher Holt immediately left the Site-22 premises and did not return for the day. He returned the day after.
