SCP-4549

A ROUNDERHOUSE Joint

rating: +107+x
3/4549 LEVEL 3/4549
CLASSIFIED
classified-bar.svg
classified-bar.svg
classified-bar.svg
classified-bar.svg
classified-bar.svg
classified-bar.svg
Item #: SCP-4549
Euclid

lab
Wellington Systems Testing Laboratories

Special Containment Procedures: Employees of Wellington Systems Testing Laboratories have been informed that the annual SCP-4549 events are part of a performance art piece protesting Wellington Systems' animal testing policy. Foundation contacts within Wellington Systems have arranged for a Foundation front company, Security Consultancy and Policies, to handle all SCP-4549 events.

During an SCP-4549 event, Wellington Systems employees are restricted to the interior of the Testing Labs until thirty minutes following the conclusion of the event.

Description: SCP-4549 refers to a phenomenon which occurs on Exit ███ of Interstate-25 in New Mexico, in front of the entrance to Wellington Systems Testing Laboratories (WSTL). SCP-4549 occurs yearly on the 15th of June. Each SCP-4549 event results in the temporary appearances of SCP-4549-1 and SCP-4549-2.

SCP-4549-1 are humanoid entities externally identical to baseline Homo sapiens sapiens. All SCP-4549-1 instances encountered thus far have been clothed in silicon-based jumpsuits, several of which carry complex floral patterns later identified as mild cognitohazards, able to inflict small headaches onto an observer. Ten to fifteen SCP-4549-1 instances appear at every SCP-4549 event, instantaneously appearing in a heavily modified Volkswagen Type 2 bus1. Exterior modifications to the bus include:

  • A lengthened chassis, at 7 meters.
  • A paint scheme with complex floral patterns, similar to the ones found on SCP-4549-1 instances.
  • Several electromagnets spaced out over the bottom of the wheelbase, to support the added length and weight.

SCP-4549-2 refers to a pair of humanoid entities also identical to baseline Homo sapiens sapiens. Both SCP-4549-2 instances dress in blue cloth based jumpsuits, and travel in a large black vehicle resembling a police SUV. SCP-4549-2 instances carry some level of authority over SCP-4549-1 instances, and usually force them to end SCP-4549 events. If approached, SCP-4549-2 instances will claim to be "only following orders" and request that any complaints be taken up with with an individual they refer to as "the advisor".

car
The vehicle used by SCP-4549-2 instances.

SCP-4549 events begin with SCP-4549-1 instances instantaneously appearing 1 to 2 kilometers away from the entrance to WSTL in their vehicle. Upon arriving at WSTL, they exit their vehicle, and begin what is believed to be a form of social demonstration. Instances have been observed exhibiting the following behaviors:

  • Most instances will sit or stand to form a circle, each facing outward and joining hands with adjacent instances.
  • On average, three to four of the individuals will carry a large sign with them, bearing anti-establishment phrases such as "Down with Wellington!" and "Corporate Greed, Timestream Bleeds!".
  • One to two individuals will produce a flute or small set of drums which they will begin playing.

These activities will continue for anywhere from 2 to 4 hours, at which point SCP-4549-2 instances will arrive in their vehicle, 0.5 kilometers from the entrance to WSTL.

Following an aggressive exchange, SCP-4549-1 instances will hurriedly reenter their vehicle. They will attempt to distance themselves from WSTL, with SCP-4549-2 instances giving chase in their vehicle. On average, 3 minutes after departing from WSTL, all instances will vanish in a large flash of light. Camera footage reveals that SCP-4549-1 instances vanish 1.5 seconds earlier than SCP-4549-2 instances.

Though the majority of SCP-4549 events are consistent in execution, a small number of recorded events have exhibited slight deviations. Anywhere from 1 to 2 hours after the beginning of the event, a significant disruption will occur within WSTL. This event consistently halts all activities in the facility, but the exact nature of each event is unique. A record of currently cataloged events is attached.

Year Description of Event
1999 An unscheduled activation of the WSTL fire system, resulting in a temporary shutdown and reset of the facility computer systems. Investigation revealed no foul play, but a breach into the computer systems occurred 47 days later.
2003 The SCP-4549 event included a small speech from an SCP-4549-1 instance about a bombing that occurred at Wellington Systems Headquarters in Delaware. No such event had occurred. Approximately seven months after this, a pipe bomb was discovered en route to the building, which was then defused.
2006 The SCP-4549 event was generally more aggressive than previous events, with a specific malice toward SCP-4549-2 instances. Notably, several of the SCP-4549-1 instances were seriously injured, bearing evidence of combat such as cuts and bruises. At least 2 instances were observed holding signs bearing the words "Remember 2012".
2012 Upon the arrival of SCP-4549-2 instances, the SCP-4549-1 instances attempted to form a human wall to restrict passage. SCP-4549-2 instances exited their vehicle, forcibly broke through the wall, and proceeded to physically assault several nonresistant SCP-4549-1 instances and arrest them.

Addendum: On June 15th, 2004, Foundation personnel were able to plant a small microphone at the entrance to WSTL, which was able to record the exchange between SCP-4549-1 and SCP-4549-2 instances.

Foreword: At this point, the SCP-4549 event had been ongoing for 3 hours and 23 minutes.

<Begin Log>

SCP-4549-2 instances arrive and exit their vehicle.

SCP-4549-1: Down with Wellington! Down with Wellin-

SCP-4549-2: Come on, fellers. Again? How long has it been since last time, 3 months? Anyway, you know the drill. May I see your temporal licenses?

SCP-4549-1: You can't suppress the people, pig! Down with Wellington!

SCP-4549-2: There's nothing to suppress here, you're violating the law and you know it.

SCP-4549-1: Shouldn't you be out stopping people from killing Hitler and Lee Harvey Oswald or something?

SCP-4549-1 instance raises its voice and addresses the crowd.

SCP-4549-1: Yeah everybody, this guy stops people from killing Hitler! What a stand-up dude!

Audible cheering from other SCP-4549-1 instances.

SCP-4549-2: Don't get smart with me, boy. If I don't do my job, next thing you know, some guy with about as much brains as the collective lot of you will go back in time and wind up his own grandfather. It's a slippery slope.

SCP-4549-1: There wouldn't be so much temporal crime if Wellington and his cronies didn't have a monopoly on the technology for it!

SCP-4549-2: That's like saying "There wouldn't be so many mid-air collisions if no-one invented jet ships!" Grow up. Are you even out of college?

SCP-4549-1: I'll have you know I have a Masters in Xenostudies.

SCP-4549-2: That explains a lot. You're all under arrest for retroactive changing and threatening to destabilize the time stream.

There are murmurs among the SCP-4549-1 instances.

SCP-4549-1: What's the matter, pig? Mad you can't turn back time to catch all of us without having to suck Wellington's fat co-

SCP-4549-2: You've got ten seconds to lay down on the ground with your hand behind your head. Starting… now.

SCP-4549-1: SCATTER! Ha, you can't arrest us all!

A brief scuffle is heard, presumably between the previously speaking instances. The sounds of several SCP-4549-1 instances screaming becomes lower after ten seconds.

A crack is heard. The SCP-4549-2 instance begins reading SCP-4549-1 their Miranda Rights.

<End Log>

Closing Statement: That particular SCP-4549-1 instance has not appeared at any SCP-4549 event since.

Addendum: Following the recovery and analysis of this log, Dr. McCall scheduled an interview with Patrick Ross, Director of WSTL. Ross has since been designated PoI-688.

Foreword: PoI-688 was under the pretense that Dr. McCall was a representative of the United States Army considering Wellington Systems for a military supply contract.

Date: July 3rd, 2004

<Begin Log>

PoI-688 enters the rooms and takes a seat.

McCall: Howdy, Mr. Ross.

PoI-688: Why hello, Lieutenant McCall! I do hope everything is to your liking.

McCall: Perfectly acceptable. Let's get down to brass tacks.

PoI-688: A man who knows what he wants, eh?

PoI-688 laughs.

McCall: Ah, sure. Now, I'm told your company specializes in experimental technologies?

PoI-688 nods enthusiastically.

PoI-688: That's right, Lieutenant. The weapons of tomorrow, we like to call them. Prototype body armors, electrical railguns, orbital kinetic drops.

McCall: Interesting. And these are more effective than our current equipment?

PoI-688: Very much so. Our research and development teams produce some of the most advanced technologies on the planet. We don't skimp out on funding them.

McCall: I see. A little birdy also mentioned to me that your company is researching temporal technologies.

PoI-688 pauses and visibly disturbed.

PoI-688: How do you know about that?

McCall: My sources are well-educated, Mr. Ross.

PoI-688: I… all of our temporal research is in its conceptual stages. Not nearly ready for application.

McCall: Is it a priority for Wellington Systems?

PoI-688: Not now, it isn't. I'd still like to know how you acquired that information. We take informational security very seriously here, Lieutenant.

McCall: I'm afraid I'm not in a position to provide that information.

PoI-688: I think it's time for us to adjourn this meeting.

McCall: Our people will contact you for another interview if we decide we're interested.

PoI-688: Whatever you say.

<End Log>

Incident 4549.1: On July 28th 2004, the following email was found sent to the account of Junior Researcher Feldman. Feldman was employed by the Foundation on July 20th. However, his SCipnet email was set up on July 28th, due to a clerical error. Feldman reports that the attached email was already present in his inbox when he logged in.

From: [UNDEFINED]
To: Junior Researcher Jacob Feldman
Subject: SCP-4549
Date: 07-03-2031

Dear Junior Researcher Feldman,

This email isn't for you. You just happened to be the unlucky fellow hired by the Foundation immediately after the interview. Right about now, you should stop reading, scroll up, press the lovely little button labeled "Fwd", and type in "pcs.tenpics|53llaccm.t#pcs.tenpics|53llaccm.t". If you keep reading past this point, there's a decent chance your consciousness will be temporally scattered for all of eternity. Gotta be safe, you know? Done? Lovely.

Now, hello Dr. McCall! Firstly, don't worry about any temporal scattering. The technology for that isn't widespread until the mid 2060s. Apologies for the middle-man, but it's easier to send an email to an account that will be created at a certain date than send one back to an address that already exists. I'm sure you understand, you're educated with temporal anomalies. Which leads me to our issue.

Your actions in regards to SCP-4549 are already destabilizing the Wellington stream, fragile as it sits. We understand that the actions of the layabouts forced your hand, but it would be in both of our interests if you refrained from further investigating. Wellington's near monopoly over legal temporal travel allows us to more effectively police and regulate it, and trying to nip their technology in the bud is only going to result in more fools like those mucking around where they don't belong. Just relax, and let our people deal with it like we always have.

Good talk. Don't bother replying.

Regards,
Thaddeus Xyank
Secure, Contain, Protect



Unless otherwise stated, the content of this page is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License