rating: +53+x

The symbol used in the Foundation's expanded IPA notation system to transcribe SCP-3735

Item #: SCP-3735

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: Foundation scanners must analyze phonetics blogs and popular online linguistic databases for any recordings with a sonic match for SCP-3735.

In any cases where an SCP-3735b-positive individual produces SCP-3735, MTF Mu-143 “Prescriptivists” is to be deployed to use class-B amnestics upon all surviving SCP-3735a-negative individuals who are exposed, contain all SCP-3735b-positive individuals present, and provide Standard Linguistic Cover Story 78 (Pirahã Malaria Strain) to family members and friends of deceased or contained individuals.

Any SCP-3735b-positive individuals contained are to be placed in Standard Humanoid Containment Units outfitted with full soundproofing.

Description: SCP-3735 is a cognitohazardous linguistic phone1 determined by Foundation linguists to be a pharyngeal nasal. According to non-anomalous phonetic analysis, said sound is impossible for human beings to produce. Nevertheless, approximately 0.03% of humans are anomalously able to produce SCP-3735 (a condition henceforth designated SCP-3735a). In most cases, this ability never manifests itself and SCP-3735a-positive individuals live normal lives, albeit at a statistically significant higher risk for late-life hearing loss.

However, when SCP-3735a-positive individuals are exposed to SCP-3735, they have a 93% chance of developing the ability to produce SCP-3735, upon which their condition is reclassified as SCP-3735b. SCP-3735b-positive individuals feel a compulsion to repeatedly produce SCP-3735, developing in multiple stages.

  • Stage B1 (immediately after exposure): SCP-3735 immediately replaces all dorsal nasals in the affected individual’s phonetic inventory.
  • Stage B2 (1 week after exposure): Coronal nasals, dorsal approximants, and any and all laryngeal consonants are replaced.
  • Stage B3 (7 weeks after exposure): All nasals and approximants, as well as voiced coronal and dorsal fricatives, are replaced.
  • Stage B4 (5 months after exposure): All consonants other than labial plosives and unvoiced labial fricatives are replaced, as well as all back vowels.
  • Stage B5 (1 year after exposure): All phonemes are replaced with SCP-3735.

As far as Foundation linguists can determine, SCP-3735b is entirely unconscious and irreversible, whether by amnestics or by any other means. SCP-3735b-positive individuals can understand spoken language, and hear nothing abnormal about their own speech.

Upon being exposed to SCP-3735, SCP-3735a-negative individuals develop symptoms based on exposure time. These symptoms cease upon conclusion of exposure, and their effects can easily be removed from memory through use of class-B amnestics if concluded before reaching Stage A5.

  • Stage A1 (upon exposure): Mild headache
  • Stage A2 (thirty seconds of exposure): Throbbing headache, hyperventilation, a sensation of a “swollen tongue.”
  • Stage A3 (one minute of exposure): Sharp headache, difficulty breathing, overproduction of saliva, visible swelling of the tongue
  • Stage A4 (two minutes of exposure): Acute anaphylaxis
  • Stage A5 (three minutes of exposure): The pharynx and tongue [REDACTED], inevitably causing severe blood loss and expiration.

Recovery: SCP-3735 was first identified in 2015, when an SCP-3735b-positive individual posted a recording of SCP-3735 in an online linguistics hobbyist group. Foundation online automated auditory memetic hazard scanners were triggered, and upon investigation by a Foundation linguist SCP-3735's anomalous properties were identified. The recording was deleted, SCP-3735a-negative listeners were treated and amnestized, and MTF Mu-143 “Prescriptivists” was deployed to contain the recording's originator, by the name of C██████ N████.

Interviewed: C██████ N████, SCP-3735b-positive individual

Interviewer: Dr. I████ P███████, Foundation linguist

Foreword: This interview was, except when marked in italics, conducted solely through written means, so as to prevent exposure to SCP-3735.

<Begin Log>

C██████ N████: I don't know what you are doing here, but it has got to be illegal.

Dr. P███████: This will go a lot easier for you if you cooperate, sir. When did you first develop the ability to produce a pharyngeal nasal sound?

C██████ N████: I have no idea what you're talking about!

Dr. P███████: Are you aware of the fact that your phonetic inventory is abnormal?

C██████ N████: I don't know what you mean.

Dr. P███████: So that's a no, then. Okay. Have you noticed any odd reactions to your voice? Things you wouldn't have expected?

C██████ N████: For instance?

Dr. P███████: Well, headaches, aches and pains, nosebleeds, difficulty breathing…

C██████ N████: Well, I don't go out much – I'm not a very social person. Most of my time I spend on the Internet, and I can order food online – I work from home. The last time I tried to talk to someone, she left in, like, thirty seconds. She said she had a bad headache, and never came back. I think that was a pathetic excuse. What a bitch.

Dr. P███████: Ah. So when was the most recent time you had a full conversation with someone?

C██████ N████: Why are you judging me for being antisocial? At least I work from home at a normal job, instead of at some sort of weird secret research facility.

Dr. P███████: Again, it would be easier for both of us if you work with us. When was the most recent time you had a full conversation with someone?

C██████ N████: I guess it was about five months ago. An old friend from ████ High2 called me. I don't know how he got my number, to be honest. But we talked for a few minutes until he abruptly hung up. Don't know why.

Dr. P███████: Can you tell me this high school friend's name?

C██████ N████: You know, I can't quite remember right now. It started with an N, I think. From Brazil3. Can I go now?

Dr. P███████: I'm afraid that won't be possible. Security, put Mr. N████ here in a regular quiet box. Sorry about this, sir.

<End Log>

Closing Statement: It seems clear from this interview that SCP-3735b-positive individuals are completely unaware of their condition. This could be a difficulty in maintaining containment.

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