Item #: SCP-3526
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: Any legislative body discovered considering changes to the legal repercussions of any effects stemming from the occurrence of natural disasters are to be infiltrated by MTF Omicron-3 ("Brittenburgers").
In order to prevent the manifestation of further SCP-3526 phenomena, no such body may be allowed to pass any legislation which would, either directly, or by the consequence of logical interaction between existing laws indirectly render any form of damage inflicted by natural disasters illegal. MTF Omicron-3 is authorized to widely administer A-class amnestics only in the event that all legal avenues for blocking such a bill have failed.
Description: SCP-3526 is a phenomenon affecting law enforcement officials interacting with certain natural disasters in jurisdictions where such disasters are capable of violating local law.
Currently documented disasters capable of resulting in SCP-3526 include:
- Avalanches
- Earthquakes
- Floods
- Hurricanes
- Severe Thunderstorms
- Tornadoes
- Tsunamis
In such instances, law enforcement officials in the vicinity will approach the hazard with the intent of subduing or imprisoning it, often resulting in the loss of both life and equipment.
Addendum 3526-1: Interview with survivor of 02/26/1990 SCP-3526 event.
Addendum 3526-2: Excerpt from newspaper article detailing the first identified instance of SCP-3526.
Addendum 3526-3: Journal recovered from the Vatican archives.
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NOTICE FROM THE FOUNDATION RECORDS AND INFORMATION SECURITY ADMINISTRATION
The following document is translated from Latin and was recovered in poor condition. Portions of text which have been recreated from context have been indicated.
— Cody James, Translator, RAISA
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Caesar. Bitterly I curse that name. Madly [drunk on] the wine of victory, and more so than ever his growing lunacy, he has made us to curse ourselves.
Is it not enough that we wage his war against the very gods, to order our soldiers to assault the ocean waters? Yet, that same night, as the [legionaries] scoured the beach for seashells to build the monument to our bizarre and heretical victory, he brought us, his loyal fasces-bearers, into his imperial tent.
He spoke of his secret fear, that Neptune, full of craft and guile, would strike back at his empire [in a time or at a place] he did not expect. Though he never spoke the divine name. He called the God his brother.
He commended [our bravery with] one breath, and with another he compels us to swear a blood oath to him.
"To forever forsake the Plutonian shores, that we shall stake an eternal vigil. Wherever Neptune dares to overreach, and affront the laws of men, there shall we be, to deliver swift justice for our Emperor [Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus]."
Julia, my wife, when you bury me, keep for yourself the coins you would give me to pay the ferryman. I fear I will never be free to cross that river.
