Foreword: When documenting conversations, redact any sensitive information (such as names and Site locations, unless said name and location is your own; however, you are welcome to redact your own for security) and follow the format outlined in the original document's Special Containment Procedures section. You are required to read and comprehend SCP-1471-J before making new additions to this page. Additions will be monitored and recorded regularly with this page kept under consistent close observation.
-Dr. John Blanchard, current assistant director of information security and SCP-1471-J project lead, ██.██.16
The format for documentation is as follows. Separate each entry with a horizontal line.
Recorded instance #XX, documented XX.XX.XX:
1. OWNER INFORMATION:
Name of owner:
Phone model and year:
Operating system/platform:
Date SCP-1471-J file was discovered:
2. APPLICATION INFORMATION:
Profile present in application database: yes | no | unsure
Log any messages received below, along with the name of the sender:
Owner comments:
Recorded instance #34, documented 02.19.15:
1. OWNER INFORMATION:
Name of owner: Alice █████, level 3 Beta-7 MTF operative
Phone model and year: Samsung Galaxy S5, 2014
Operating system/platform: Android
Date SCP-1471-J file was discovered: 03.24.15
2. APPLICATION INFORMATION:
Profile present in application database: yes | no | unsure
Log any messages received below, along with the name of the sender:
Jane ██████: Alice bb
Jane ██████: I haven't seen you since that fiasco in New York with the saltshaker and the family-size Wheat Thins
Jane ██████: shit went down
Jane ██████: miss that Keter-class ass of yours tbhAlice █████: uhhh…?
Alice █████: Wait a sec. What app are you using? This isn't the Foundation one.Owner comments:
It's obvious she's not actually sending these. She would've called my ass Thaumiel.
Recorded instance #358, documented 02.27.2016:
1. OWNER INFORMATION:
Name of owner: Agent Hu Bao, MTF B-1 operative
Phone model and year: iPhone 5C
Operating system/platform: iOS 9.2
Date SCP-1471-J file was discovered: 10.15.2015
2. APPLICATION INFORMATION:
Profile present in application database: yes | no | unsure
Log any messages received below, along with the name of the sender:
█████: Bao-bao, y u havent called back? Been waiting for u. :)
Agent Hu: Who the fuck are you? Stop popping up in my phone!
█████: My, straight to the point, are you… dun worry, I like that in a man.
Agent Hu: Answer me here! I'm changing phones every week 'cos of you!
█████: We r bound by fate. Changing things like ur phone wont stop us.
Agent Hu: Bloody stalker, if only I have that luck in dealing with gois.
█████: Good. I dun want competition now, wont I? ;)
Owner comments:
Will swap to the new Samsung phone when it comes out. Will buy me at least three two days.
Recorded instance #81, documented 03.04.2016:
1. OWNER INFORMATION:
Name of owner: Dr. Benny Ferris-Reiner, Level 3 Researcher.
Phone model and year: Microsoft Lumia 950 XL, 2015.
Operating system/platform: Windows 10 Mobile
Date SCP-1471-J file was discovered: 12.1.2015
2. APPLICATION INFORMATION:
Profile present in application database: yes | no | unsure
Log any messages received below, along with the name of the sender:
Agent ██████████: hey baby ;) how's your evnin cummin if you get my drift
Dr. Ferris-Reiner: Um, I don't know you.
Agent ██████████: sure we do babe :) :). ive seen you workin' over your desk ben-ben
Dr. Ferris-Reiner: Ben-ben? What? Actually what is this app?
Agent ██████████: oh come on now u r too cute and i bet sitting at dat desk of your isn't stppin those muscles of yours. ( ͡°ω ͡°).
Agent ██████████: i bet theres a reality-bendin keter who's willing to increase that ass of yours
Dr. Ferris-Reiner: Agent ██████████?
Agent ██████████: yep sugar.
Dr. Ferris-Reiner: This is highly inappropriate behavior from you. I am extremely disappointed.
Agent ██████████: but thats what the app is for
Dr. Ferris-Reiner: I have no idea what this app is for, and I'm going to assume this is a containment breach of some highly dangerous memetic entity because nothing you are saying makes sense. Goodnight.
Agent ██████████: i guess goodnight then
(No messages were sent or received for 2 minutes)
Dr. Ferris-Reiner: Actually how do I log out of this app?
Agent ██████████: u go over to the top corner, press your profile name and then press log out.
Dr. Ferris-Reiner: Ah.
Owner comments:
I am not ashamed by this. Why would I be ashamed by this? Although I appreciate that Agent ██████████ is a beautiful woman, I have no idea why she would do something like this. Why are you guys snickering? Did I say something funny? What?!
Recorded instance #117, documented 04.23.2016:
1. OWNER INFORMATION:
Name of owner: Dr. E████ A██████ D█████████
Phone model and year: Samsung Galaxy S5, 2014
Operating system/platform: Android
Date SCP-1471-J file was discovered: 04.22.16
2. APPLICATION INFORMATION:
Profile present in application database: yes | no | unsure
Log any messages received below, along with the name of the sender:
[REDACTED]: Oh hey
[REDACTED]: Long time, no see, docDr. D█████████: what.
[REDACTED]: surprised? I guess I would be too.
Dr. D█████████: what.
[REDACTED]: Yeah, actually, I kind of need to ask you about this thing.
[REDACTED]: See, I just got this brand-new [REDACTED] phone and it's already got this here thing installed on it that I cant get rid of.Dr. D█████████: what.
[REDACTED]: Oh yeah, also its installed on ███ now. Not sure why. Or how. He's not even a phone.
Dr. D█████████: what.
(Immediately after this message was sent, a message containing garbage data was received from another profile, currently believed to be associated with the aforementioned ███.)
[REDACTED]: I guess he might be sufficiently complex to qualify by the program's standards, but still, I'm completely baffled as to how it even found us, especially after [DATA EXPUNGED - See Incident Report i-████-███ regarding the escape of SCP-████]
[REDACTED]: I mean, how would they know it was me, anyway? I got this phone like three days ago.
[REDACTED]: er, four days after adjustment.
[REDACTED]: Anyway, how you been? Didn't get demoted or anything lately, right?Dr. D█████████: what.
[REDACTED]: For a while I was worried they were gonna blame you for what happened. Glad they didn't. Wouldve been a real waste.
[REDACTED]: Did they ever figure out how we [DATA EXPUNGED]Dr. D█████████: what.
[REDACTED]: Um
[REDACTED]: I found [DATA EXPUNGED] the entire site? Remember?
[REDACTED]: Doc, you okay? You were way more talkative when I was contained.
[REDACTED]: Doc?
[REDACTED]: they wiped you didnt they
[REDACTED]: fuckshitpiss
[REDACTED]: DocDr. D█████████: what.
[REDACTED]: Hang in there. We're all pulling for you.
[REDACTED]: Keep up the good work, DrEAD.Owner comments:
what.
Recorded instance #69, documented 4.30.2016:
1. OWNER INFORMATION:
Name of owner: Sofia Muñoz
Phone model and year: iPhone 7, 2016
Operating system/platform: iOS
Date SCP-1471-J file was discovered: 5.16.2016
2. APPLICATION INFORMATION:
Profile present in application database: yes | no | unsure
Log any messages received below, along with the name of the sender:
Unknown: hey there bb
Sofia Muñoz: hey???
Unknown: was last night a 1 time thing or
Sofia Muñoz: who are you???
Unknown: don't tell me u forgot already ;)
Sofia Muñoz: i think you have the wrong person
Unknown: sofia muñoz? dick class: keter? disruption class: my asshole?
Sofia Muñoz: oh uh i think someone gave you the wrong name
Sofia Muñoz: im a girl
Unknown: oh
Unknown: oh sorry
Unknown: fuck y does this happen every time i use this app
Sofia Muñoz: sorry
Owner comments:
I feel bad for that poor guy. I hope he meets someone nice soon.
