Reality Check

rating: +128+x

Item #: [pending] / SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Doctor Kiryu sat at his office desk, assorted experiment logs strewn around his workspace as he scribbled on the topmost sheet of paper. He didn’t look up when his assistant entered the room, dropped another stack of paperwork on the desk, and stole the unopened bottle of water sitting next to the potted bamboo.

“You’re writing up the report documentation already?” Researcher Riven Mercer uncapped the bottle and downed a third of the water.

Kiryu still didn’t look up. “Yes. There’s only a few more preliminary tests left to run, and in an hour or so we’ll have enough data compiled to write something solidly coherent.”

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be stored in a fitted storage case, and kept in a standard containment locker at Site-19.

“Why the custom-fit case?” Mercer picked up three of the testing log sheets, briefly scanning the contents.

“It’s an old thing. Liable to break and should be handled carefully. Still sharp, though. Safety precaution. Have you booked and checked on the testing room yet, Mercer?”

No response, save for the door swinging shut.

Access to SCP-XXXX for testing is to require Level-3 authorization. Any interviews conducted with SCP-XXXX are to be logged; the corresponding documentation is to be forwarded to Dr. Kiryu for analysis.

Kiryu crossed out the portion of sentence after the semicolon, but then after some thought, wrote it back in. Besides, once the typed report was submitted, the site director would be the one to decide whether the interviews would need further scrutiny. That sentence could be removed if found unnecessary.

Description: SCP-XXXX is an unornamented longsword believed to have been created during the late medieval period, approximately the mid-13th century.

Riven was back a few minutes later, peering over Kiryu's shoulder. “Is “longsword” really the right word for it? I feel like the medieval terminology would’ve been more like ‘cut and thrust sword’ or ‘hand and a half stabby thing’. Something more specific.”

“I’ll consult someone on-site who has more experience with this sort of thing, Riven. Let me finish writing the rough draft already.”

When held at the grip by a human being, SCP-XXXX is capable of speech. Though SCP-XXXX will typically shout generic challenges and similar battle taunts when swung, it has been known to emit distressed vocalizations when making contact with straw-filled practice dummies, and will produce crying-like sounds when used to slice vegetables.

“Are you serious? It cried? Wish I could’ve been there… why didn’t you ask me to aid during the experiment?”

“You were testing out the antique fighting fans with another researcher. Rivers, I think.” Kiryu gathered all the papers into a messy stack, scowled at it, and briskly shuffled them into a more neat arrangement. He picked up the papers and stood up. “Besides, after the first cabbage, I had to suspend the rest of the trials.”

SCP-XXXX is sapient, and able to “communicate” with other swords through an unknown process, allegedly allowing SCP-XXXX to determine characteristics of the weapons it has come in contact with; such information includes relative age and events the weapon has been involved with. Though the reach of the effect is unknown, it is believed that SCP-XXXX is able to interact with any sword within a 1 meter radius of its blade.

“Oh, you’re typing now? The room we reserved is open early; just checked.” Riven looked over Kiryu’s shoulder and read off the laptop screen. “How did we find out it can mind-link-talk-whatever to other swords?”

Kiryu chuckled. “I’m getting to that. Pass me the recovery log, won’t you?”

Addendum XXXX-1: SCP-XXXX was initially recovered by the British Museum, following an archaeological estate refurbishment. While it was held in temporary storage pending future display, museum staff handling the sword reported hearing voices, generally requesting to be placed “closer to that lovely rapier a few shelves over” so it could be “properly introduced to her”.

“…so it was hitting on another sword? Was that other sword anomalous?”

“Not that we could tell. There’s actually an interview log somewhere in there that I found interesting. Why don’t you read through it while I finish typing up these last two addenda?”

Addendum XXXX-2: Though it is still inconclusive whether SCP-XXXX produces speech itself or is inhabited by an entity that speaks for it, interviews conducted with the object have indicated that it shows a familiarity with various swords of European myth. (See following transcript)

<Begin Log>

Dr. Kiryu is seated at a table in an experimental room. SCP-XXXX lies on the table; Kiryu holds it by the grip.

Dr. Kiryu: Tell me more about the other blades you knew.

SCP-XXXX: I heard there was one particularly choosy blade… Excalibur? Many stories about that one. I can’t imagine turning so many potential wielders away. And Durendal, he had so many things in his hilt. And he was proclaimed to be the sharpest in the world. I wouldn’t want to live with that pressure.

Dr. Kiryu: Did you ever come in contact with either sword?

SCP-XXXX: [pause] No. I never met the two. But every blade I met knew the stories.

Dr. Kiryu: Were there any others you knew to be famous?

SCP-XXXX: Hmm. Joyeuse. Joyeuse was so pretty, so I hear. But there’s no way I could deal with all that attention.

Dr. Kiryu: Do you wish your first owner was more well-known?

SCP-XXXX: I can’t say for sure. It’s harder to stay true to your path if people want to use you. Clarent was said to be a sword of peace, and look what happened to him.

Dr. Kiryu: Are there any you envied?

SCP-XXXX: I admired two highly. Arondight and Galatine, I think their names were. Sometimes I think about how much I’d like to go on adventures like they did, rescuing damsels and serving their lords righteously.

Dr. Kiryu: What happened with the rapier you wanted to be introduced to?

SCP-XXXX: [silence]

Dr. Kiryu: Is something wrong?

SCP-XXXX: He refused to speak to me.

<End Log>

Riven snickered. “Aww, those are some awkward circumstances. Surprising that it knew about so many different legendary swords, though. Are you including this interview in the documentation?”

“I plan to.”

“What about any other notable behaviors? Anything else that revealed more about the thing’s mentality?”

“Pass me the experiment log about the kid’s toy sword, please.” Kiryu kept typing.

Addendum XXXX-3: When placed near a child’s plastic play sword during an experiment, SCP-XXXX expressed excitement after the encounter, stating that the sword belonged to a hero who had slain many dragons and was destined for greatness. The plastic sword, on loan from Doctor ████’s son, was notably considered a favorite plaything. Further testing of SCP-XXXX’s ability to appraise weapons of more historical significance is pending.

“That’s adorable.”

“I agree. And it firmly establishes the entity as rather benign, I think.” Kiryu closed his laptop. “Let’s finish up that last test.”

Addendum XXXX-4: During a series of tests run on ██/██/████, SCP-XXXX was placed next to a medieval sword for several hours. When questioned, SCP-XXXX appeared to have undergone shock and disillusionment, repeatedly stating, “raiding and pillaging at behest of the lord… was this what being a knight really meant?” SCP-XXXX then refused to speak for seven days following the incident.

“When do you think it’ll speak again?”

“There’s no way to say for sure,” Kiryu sighed. He typed away at his laptop, a folder open in front of him. “It might start talking tomorrow, or three years from now. We don’t know enough. We don’t even know if it’s the sword itself that was talking, or something inhabiting the sword that just up and left.”

“It’s been almost two weeks… what are you going to do with the report you’ve got?” Riven picked up the folder and flipped through the files within. “There’s a lot we have here.”

“I’ll mark it ‘pending’ or ‘unfiled’. I’m not entirely convinced that it would have needed serious containment, anyway. There are more dangerous things in unspecialized containment.” A few clicks of the wireless mouse. “It’ll be put with the other ones that didn’t make it.”

Riven looked up. “Other ones?”

“Sometimes we break things to learn about them. Sometimes we can’t put them back together, no matter how much we learn.”

“How many others?”

“Hundreds, at least. Thousands maybe. Not all of them are or were inanimate.”


“We’ve got another incoming cache of items to process. Submit the sword and the existing documentation to Storage and Records. We need to move on.”

Request for Item Storage (Doctor M. Kiryu, Researcher R. Mercer)
Anomalous Item #███ Cache: ██
Recovery Date: ██/██/████
Description of Effects: speech, apparent sentience, inanimate interaction with like objects (see attached documentation)
Reason for Storage Request: item has currently ceased to exhibit effects
Routine Reexamination: monthly

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