News for February 2016

« January 2016 | February 2016 | March 2016 »

Welcome to this installment of site news, the only news outlet that you follow that can afford to not be updated on time and get away with it! This is a series showing off news from the site, articles from the past month, and fancontent for you to check out and discover! Be sure to leave a comment with your thoughts!

On-Site News

Featured Articles

• The featured articles for this month are SCP-2314 ("Проект Стебельчатый Глаз") by Dr Nikolaus and Crayne, and Loyal to the Cause by Erku. One's about a roundworm that suppresses your immune system in unexpected ways, and the other is about a Foundation employee being put to the test. Check them out!
• The featured articles from last month were SCP-1431 ("Scavenger Hunt!") by UglyFlower and A Visitation by AssertiveRoland. One's about an odd scavenger hunt that gives you some… odd goals to complete, and the other is about a wealthy man who wants to chat about an infamous book of his. Check them out if you missed them!

Rest of the News

• The Mobile Task Force Contest posting period has ended, and we've got a range of great entries! I'm very happy with how the contest turned out, and hopefully, all of you are as well. Go peruse the entries!
• The tales hub has been reorganized! The layout will be a bit different, and updates twice a week instead of automatically, but should still be as accessible as before. You can also now browse tale entries by title, in addition to still being able to browse by author and by year.
• The 2nd Annual SCP Foundation March Madness competition will be starting very soon! Guts, glory, excitement, pointless bracketing! Everything you love about March Madness, now SCP-ified!

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Missing out on articles? Enjoy a recap on the articles from the past month. Because of how the past month has turned out, I figure it'd be only sensible to separate contest articles from non-contest articles for your ease of reading. Let's start out with non-contest articles. Enjoy!

+ Non-contest articles!

Week of February 1st

From werebricks to Misters to sloths, oh my! Lots of strange anomalies to sink our teeth into.

SCPs

• SCP-2537 ("Werebricks") - Brick by brick, these werebricks are assembling a bridge to an unknown and mysterious place. But I mean… they're werebricks! That's a trip in of itself! Written by TwistedGears.
• SCP-2284 ("Mr. Lie") - Everything Mr. Lie says is objectively true. You have no reason to disbelieve him. Would you ever disbelieve someone who could ever lie? Of course not. Written by TwistedGears.
• SCP-2774 ("The Slow Burn Sloth") - The greatest prison is the body, where only the mind can control itself. Colorblindness is recommended. Written by Moohab.
• SCP-2318 ("Awake in the Infinite Cold") - There are places in this world that defy explanation, that abhor understanding, that exist within a vacuum of absolution. These are the quiet places, forgotten and dark, and they go on forever. Written by djkaktus.
• SCP-396 ("And Suddenly, Chair") - This cute little chair just wants to lend a helping seat to people! The only downside is that it can be a bit too eager to displace itself at times, and can cause some issues. Like displacing the Pope's throne. Originally written by Dr Kondraki, rewritten by Roget.
• SCP-2346 ("Die Bescheidene") - A long-forgotten ship, now lying at the bottom of the ocean. It moves more and more, beckoning divers to pilot the ship. Where to? That's for you to board the ship and find out. Written by kmx37r.
• SCP-WTF-J ("The Worst") - Take one part fascism, five parts Kate Bush, a few nuns, and [REDACTED], and what do you get? daveyoufool invites you to review the procedures for yourself.

Tales

• On The Efficiency Of Various Postal Services - A series of letters concerning SCP-2699 and the mysterious employers surrounding it. Written by Eta Carinae.
• Remembrance Of Walking - He walked. He could only remember walking, and he will continue to walk, traversing the boardwalk empire. Written by Drewbear.
• On Seabirds And Sleep - I dunno what this means. But, well, y'know. Poets don't write to be understood. Written by Randomini.

Week of February 8th

CATS AND TRASH TRASHCATS TRASH AND CATS CATTRASH

SCPs

• SCP-796 ("River Cat") - "He is quiet and small, he is black/From his ears to the tip of his tail;/He can creep through the tiniest crack,/He can walk on the narrowest rail." -T. S. Eliot, Old Possum's Book Of Practical Cats. Written by minmin.
• SCP-2493 ("One Man's Garbage") - Trade an endless supply of rubbish for advanced technology? Yes please. Contain a man made of antimatter safely on the moon? Sure. Destroy your entire universe because you couldn't be bothered recycling? Preferably not. Recycled by Jack Ike.
• SCP-008-J ("Geoff") - Oh hey, it's you!¹ I was just cleaning up around here, and noticed that I saw you before. How have you been?² Hey, do you have any social media? We gotta get in touch more often. Tell DomeAcolyte that I said thanks for connecting us.³
• SCP-2321 ("Foor Th'luv Uv God Doont Yuuz It") - It came from the future to make the present our past! But some dumbass broke it and now it's junk. Written by TL333s.
• SCP-2917 ("USS Enterprise") - All aboard the SCPS Enterprise! She updates herself to match any modern boat and give them a run for their money! With it, the Foundation shall be ever-so vigilant on the seas! A translation of SCP-217-KO. Written by Major Gordon, translated by shfoakdls.
• SCP-2524 ("No Strings") - Why don't you come in? I saw something very interesting in your shadow, I thought you'd like to know… Written by TyGently.
• SCP-2470 ("The Void Singularity") - 'Cogito ergo absumo': I think, therefore I annihilate. A translation of SCP-1001-RU. Written by theTBAPb, translated by Gene R and Dr Kostyankyn].
• SCP-145-J ("The Last Straw") - Goddammit, fucking Foundation assholes. Thinking they can cut corners on shit like "food" and "basic working decency", but "ooh look at us, we just got another fifty plates of titanium for SCP-Blah blah blah!", the pricks. Written by Namnesor.

Tales

• Narcissus - He's always been there for you, even if you can't talk about him. Written by Oboebandgeek99.

Week of February 15th

Do you think deities, too, play video games?

SCPs

• SCP-2788 ("God is Red Rich") - As the times change, the people change too. What is a god supposed to do but change with them? Written by Univine.
• SCP-2219 ("PORRIDGE") - This boss was too easy for players to get past. This boss couldn't dissuade people from playing with blindness alone. But this boss… this boss is juuuust right. Written by daveyoufool.
• SCP-2803 ("TotleighSoft - "Because COMPUTERS!"") - TotleighSoft is dedicated to bringing you the finest in abstract eldritch video game entertainment. Proofreading sold separately. Written by daveyoufool.
• SCP-80-K-J ("Chicken Corps") - An incredibly skilled and well-trained fighting force, only limited by their feathers and lack of opposable thumbs. Written by trennerdios.
• SCP-2325 ("Involuntary Bullet Catching") - The ultimate bodyguard. Guarantees safety and peace of mind! Warning: bodyguard not guaranteed to arrive in one piece - or in solid form. Written by Lazar Lyusternik.
• SCP-2227 ("If You See Something, Say Something") - There are sinister ghosts in the NYC subways. But are they really ghosts? And are they really sinister? Manifested by MrRonin.
• SCP-2291 ("FUN BOX") - It's a box that makes me feel… fun. Wait, this isn't fun! What's happening to me? That box is… fun. Written by arnbobo.

Tales

• Date Night - Another late, romantic night with Clef and 173. Oh, how Clef has yearned for these nights. Finally, he gets to be passionate with the one he truly loves. Written by Hercules Rockefeller.

Week of February 22 - 29th

Snuggle in tonight with your love with a nice book… or just video games. Video games are always fine.

SCPs

• SCP-2837 ("Ancient Physics") - What do you get when you combine Platonic solids, huge cubical containment chambers, and just a touch of Aristotlean reality? Written by Drewbear.
• SCP-2667 ("The Sightseers of Provence") - Talking statues are the perfect windows through which to see the sights of Earth. Written by feathersnake.
• SCP-2088 ("The MC&D Center") - Why not spend your vacation on scenic Saturn? Take in the sights, watch the shows… Tickets sold by Roget.
• SCP-2976 ("Hall of the Last King") - When such an amazing book describes such a wonderful place, how can you help yourself but to recreate it? Written by AdminBright.
• SCP-1471-J ("Sensual Containment Procedures") - Lonely at night? Looking for some love? Anomalous love, perhaps? Then we have the perfect app for you. Sensually coded by Cyantreuse does not match any existing user name.
• SCP-2752 ("Junk Male") - In a world where the Hinomaru flies over the Eastern Hemisphere, a paternalistic service expands to other worlds. Sadly, not every "human" in those other worlds can digest or dispose paper and ink properly. Written by MrWrong.
• SCP-2652 ("That Deaf, Dumb and Blind Kid") - That deaf, dumb and blind… humanoid of sorts, sure plays some mean esports. Too good, in fact. I think it likes esports a bit too much… Written by Smapti.

Tales

• What Is Love? - What is love? It's sticking together through thick and thin. And sewing together tentacles to skin. Written by AdminBright.
• The Lost Treasure of the Stranglefruits - The apocalypse has settled in, and Dr. Spanko wishes for his treasured stranglefruits. And then one day, the perfect opportunity presents itself. Written by daveyoufool.
• Some Rational Inheritance - The conclusion to the first act of Wills And Ways, as the successors to the past Marshall, Carter, and Dark meet with strange figures to take their place in the company. Written by Randomini.
• Endless Hunt Part One: All the World Will be Your Enemy... - Being held captive gets easier when the voices in your head keep you company. First in a new series, Of An Endless Hunt. Written by rumetzen.

Author Pages

• Cyantreuse's Pit of Despair and SCPhotoshop - Cyantreuse does not match any existing user name's author page! Check out her cool art and cosplay! Oh, and also some articles. I hear those are articles are quite good.

Contest Articles

Rather than sort these by posting date, for ease of you readers, this is sorted by teams! The team order here is exactly like the one on the contest page. If you or your team members wish to have blurbs for these articles, please post them in the discussion thread. I (or another Community Outreach team member; yes, they'll do it for you :3) will add it for you!

+ Contest articles!

Team Name: Long Live The Cake! ("Chi-17")

Team Members: thd-glasses (Captain), jso9923, Major Gordon, ZaWoo

• GoI Format Article: SC-48/71-15/5013 by ZaWoo
• Tale: A Big Deal - 1 by thd-glasses
• After-Action Report: MTF-X-17 Internal Document by Major Gordon
• Tale: A Big Deal - 2 by thd-glasses
• Tale: Upsilon-23 Aperiodic Report by thd-glasses
• SCP Article: SCP-2395 - Dormant Star by jso9923

Team Name: Technical Support ("Rho-9")

Team Members: AJMansfield (Captain), Some_Potato, Moohab

• GoI Format Article: Redzone RedDB Archive Asynchronous Copy Vulnerability by AJMansfield
• Tale: Your First Support Assignment by AJMansfield
• Tale: Warm Milk and Ramen by Moohab
• SCP Article: SCP-2234 - Great Deals on Pineal Removal by Some_Potato
• After-Action Report: Blue Team by AJMansfield

Team Name: We're Here Too ("Lambda-5")

Team Members: Zmax15 (Captain), TophatLord, blithely, EmberTech

• SCP Article: SCP-2446 - Mobile Task Force Lambda-5 ("White Rabbits") by Zmax15
• Supplement: SCP-2446-B4 Interview by TophatLord
• GoI Format Article: Lambda-Killer by blithely
• Tale: 2525 North Waterworks St. by Zmax15
• Tale: charles-hull-shall-be by EmberTech

Team Name: Site-19 String Quartet ("Eta-11")

Team Members: WrongJohnSilver (Captain), psul, Smapti, CumaeanSibyl

• Tale: A Convincing Lyre by psul
• Tale: An Impenitent Thief by psul
• GoI Format Article: Project Proposal 2014-2112: "Dreams of Failure" by Smapti
• SCP Article: SCP-2402 - That Takes Me Back by WrongJohnSilver
• Tale: Enjoy the Silence by CumaeanSibyl
• After-Action Report: The Musical Suspects by psul

Team Name: Apotheosis (Tau-5, "Samsara")

Team Members: A Random Day (Captain), GreenWolf, sirpudding, TyGently

• Tale: Avatara by A Random Day
• GoI Format Article: GRANT REQUEST FOR INVESTIGATING THE APPLICATION OF CERTAIN RESEARCH ASSETS IN OVERCOMING INHERENT LIMITATIONS OF THE HUMAN BODY by GreenWolf
• SCP Article: SCP-2970 - Holy Misplacement by TyGently
• After-Action Report: Operation AZURE PEREGRINE by sirpudding
• GoI Format Article: The Lord of Endowments by sirpudding
• Tale: Samsara by A Random Day and TyGently

Team Name: There's No Me In Team ("Mu-3")

Team Members: DrSinful (Captain), Dr Solo, Boogey_Man23, DrStranger

• Tale: Application to Form MTF Mu-3 by Boogey_Man23 and DrStranger
• GoI Format Article: 'The Little Draft Horses' (G2T67/L9VXC/WI3M3) by Boogey_Man23
• Tale: Broker-Bailer-Grifter-THIEF by DrStranger
  • Supplement/AAR: Cover Letter for Operation Free Market by Boogey_Man23
• SCP Article: SCP-2463 - An Emperor's Debt by Dr Solo
• After-Action Report: Recovery Log-2463 by DrSinful

Team Name: The Dream Team ("Omicron Rho")

Team Members: Faminepulse (Captain), Crayne, SoullessSingularity

• GoI Format Article: #Xiupania by Faminepulse
• SCP Article: SCP-2603 - Its Maiden Voyage by Crayne
• After-Action Report: Black Lotus by Faminepulse and contributions by Crayne
• Tale: Oneirocritic by Faminepulse
• Tale: Oneirochemy by Faminepulse
• Tale: Oneirophrenia by Faminepulse
• Tale: A Breath Of Relief No Different From Drowning by SoullessSingularity

Team Name: Send in the Clowns ("Omicron-8")

Team Members: Dr Hysteria (Captain), TobiasTheTapir, daveyoufool, MrWrong

• SCP Article: SCP-2214 - Fart Jokes by TobiasTheTapir
• Tale: Finfiction by TobiasTheTapir
• GoI Format Article: SPC-2615 by MrWrong
• SCP Article: SCP-2416 - The Day the Clown Died by daveyoufool

Team Name: A Slow but Steady Increase in the Number of Games in Town (Sigma-66, "Sixteen Tons")

Team Members: EldritchCadence (Captain), Silberescher, Vincent_Redgrave

• After-Action Report: MTF Sigma-66 Post-Mission Psychological Evaluation by Silberescher
• SCP Article: SCP-2238 - Tributary by Silberescher
• Tale: Stick the Landing by EldritchCadence
• GoI Format Article: Two Transcribed Conversations In Very Different Tones by EldritchCadence
• Tale: A Dysfunctional Heist by Vincent_Redgrave

Team Name: We Deny The Existence of Other Games In Town (Sigma-3, "Bibliographers")

Team Members: Gaffney does not match any existing user name (Captain), thedeadlymoose, TwistedGears, Dexanote

• After-Action Report: Lessons Learned by Dexanote
• Tale: Site 11, Conference Room K, 8:58 AM, July 12, 1982 by Gaffney does not match any existing user name
• Tale: Nothing Says "Promotion" Like a Bag Over Your Head by TwistedGears
• Tale: Making a Scene by TwistedGears
• Tale: Magic Orientation by thedeadlymoose
• GoI Format Article: The Conspiracy Of "Sigma-3" ("The Devils") by thedeadlymoose
• SCP Article: SCP-2975 - Another Sun by thedeadlymoose

Team Name: Jäeger Bombers ("Eta-5")

Team Members: Choiwel (Captain), Milo359 does not match any existing user name, Shaggydredlocks, LordSpy

• GoI Format Article: LTE-2712-Bosch by Shaggydredlocks
• Tale: Eta-5 and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Oragamizilla by Shaggydredlocks
• SCP Article: SCP-2764 - The Eldritch Antarctic by Choiwel
• After-Action Report: Exploration Log: DIM-3███-D by Shaggydredlocks

Team Name: Team Wayfarer ("Eta-13")

Team Members: HotCocoaNerd (Captain), Jacob Conwell, kol aumer

• Tale: Wayfarers by Jacob Conwell
• GoI Format Article: The Hydra's Spine by Jacob Conwell
• Tale: We Boldly Went by Jacob Conwell
• SCP Article: SCP-2344 [Pending title] by HotCocoaNerd

Team Name: Challenge Accepted ("Pi-51")

Team Members: Asalain (Captain), izenkel does not match any existing user name, Kaestine, ynha

• SCP Article: SCP-2957 - Louvre of Croatia by Asalain
• GoI Format Article: 'Non Titled 277TH'(GU5T2/V12HR/OPRT5) by izenkel does not match any existing user name

Team Name: The Notos Blues & Jazz Band Experience ("Rho-19")

Team Members: Kalinin (Captain), Von Pincier, minmin, Zyn

• SCP Article: SCP-2474 - Irnini Mons by Kalinin
• Tale: M13 Personnel Memorabilia Log by Zyn
• GoI Format Article: Volume 19.113.A-01: Of the Instruments, Composers, and the Confici Nobiscum by Von Pincier
• Tale: Planetfall by Kalinin
• After-Action Report: Exploration Log 2474.1 by minmin
• Tale: Labyrinth's End by Kalinin

Team Name: Team Basic ("Kappa-10")

Team Members: LurkD (Captain), djkaktus, Roget, Doctor Cimmerian

• GoI Format Article: 'Rogue AI' (NVEO4/YVN3E/PN6UG) by Doctor Cimmerian
• GoI Format Article: Draft Proposal For Programme Arduinosis 9001 by Roget
• After-Action Report: Come Back Kid by Doctor Cimmerian
• Tale: Hello World by LurkD
  • Tale: Part II by LurkD
  • Tale: Part III by LurkD
  • Tale: Part IV by LurkD
• SCP Article: SCP-2522 - hatbot.aic by djkaktus

Team Name: Evolved from Naturally Occurring Gears, Levers and Pulleys ("Stigma-9")

Team Members: Athenodora (Captain), ChaoSera, Flamels, Lex1nat0r

• Tale: Broken Faith by ChaoSera
• After-Action Report: Operation Hippodrome by Lex1nat0r
• Tale: Recording Hippodrome-045 by Lex1nat0r
• SCP Article: SCP-2518 - “Chariot of Paternal Deitie” by Lex1nat0r and Athenodora

Fandom Stuff

What's been going on in the community aside from our site? Well…

• Sadly, it was a rough month to find stuff, and I just couldn't :( If you guys remember anything that happened in February, feel free to tell me!

Fanart

• Dr. Frog has given us a creeptastic image of a good horror article, SCP-1730. You can see the leech boy in his gross glory here!
• Ever wish the SCP Foundation had a movie or TV adaptation? You can keep imagining how cool that would look with these posters, made by Cyantreuse does not match any existing user name! You can check out her gallery of work here! (Blog NSFW).
• And speaking of cool posters, DrKens created some cool movie poster mockups for various contest teams! This one is MTF Tau-5 ("Samsara"), created by the Apotheosis team. Check out his tumblr here!
• 芥绿 made a wonderful comic for a cool WL tale! You can check it out here and get emotional :')

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Thanks for tuning in again, guys! I apologize for delivering late this month and last month. I will figure out a way to repay for my sins, but in the mean time, enjoy!

« January 2016 | February 2016 | March 2016 »

Footnotes

1. W-What, how did you get here?

2. What are you doing here? This isn't even in-universe!

3. Hey, you can't just leave like this!