LaRue Post - Nancy's Shoe
rating: +46+x

The following is a posting found on the main Message Board in the Market Square in La Rue Macabre.


La Rue Macabre

FOR SALE: One ol' shoe. (It's a nice shoe!)

I have this shoe, and it's a nice shoe, an' I'm figgurin' someone else might have a need for it. $20, obo.

Now, how did Ol' Nancy get himself an ol' shoe, you might be askin'? Well, y'see, one day I was walkin' down by the river, an' I came upon an ol' shoe, just a'floatin' there in the water. I dunno whose ol' shoe it was, but I figured someone'd be all upset that they ain't got their shoe no more. So I pulled that ol' shoe outta the water all quick like.

I took that old shoe an' I wandered from place to place all along up that river, callin' out all polite, askin' if anyone was missin' that ol' shoe. I first came to Mr. Beaver, workin' on 'is house.

La Rue Macabre

"Hullo, Mr. Beaver!" I called to 'em. "Ello Mr. Nancy!" 'e says to me.

"You missin' an ol' shoe, Mr. Beaver?" I says to 'im. "No! Beaver's don't be wearin' no shoes!" 'e tells me. "'Course, that's right!" I thinks to misself, an' I give Beaver a nod an' keep on walkin'.

Nex, I comeup on Mrs. Turtle, sunnin' 'erself all fancy like out on a log. "Hullo, Mrs. Turtle!" I called to 'er. "Ello Mr. Nancy!" she says to me. "You missin' an ol' shoe, Mrs. Turtle?" I says to 'er. "No! Turtle's don't be wearin' no shoes!" she tells me.

"'Course, that's right!" I thinks to misself. I was all down on misself, thinkin' 'bout how I shoulda knowd that, an I forgot to be all polite an' give a nod to Mrs. Turtle.

I was still havin' a hard think to misself as I walked, an' I didn't see Mr. Leopard, up in a tree, gnawin' on a long bone with a buncha' meat on it. "Ello, Mr. Nancy." He says to me, in that slow way o' 'is. "Oh! Mr. Leopard!" I says to 'im. "I din't see ya there. You be missin' an ol' shoe, Mr. Leopard?" I says to 'im.

"No…" 'e says to me, still chewin' on 'is bone. "I don't think I am." 'e says, giving me a long look. Now, I din't much like that look, so I edged away all quick like again, an' I kept on lookin'.

Took me a good long while, wanderin' up 'n down that ol' river. I done ask'd Mr. & Mrs. Zebra, an' they said no. I ask'd Ms. Elephant, an' she said no too. So did Mr. Wildebeast, an' Mrs. Baboon, an' Mr. Antelope. Ain't none of them ain't got no missin' shoe.

Then, I comeup on Wise Old Mr. Rhinoceros. "Ello, Mr. Rhino!" I calls to 'em. An' e' turnt 'is big gray eye at me 'n said. "Hello, Mr. Nancy. I hear you are lookin' for someone who lost an old shoe?"

La Rue Macabre

I look'd at 'em, n' look'd at 'is big ol' feet, 'n I realized 'twernt 'im neither. I musta look'd mighty disappointed, 'cause Mr. Rhino harumphed at me. "You know, Mr. Nancy, none of Us ever wear shoes. Why would you be asking us about your ol' shoe, then?"

It was then I done realized a thing. I thank'd Mr. Rhino, an' I done run back down the river to find Mr. Leopard.

"Mr. Leopard!" I called, once I found the sly ol' cat. 'E was sleepin' in 'is tree, havin' finished 'is meal. "Why you din't tell me you knew who was missin' an' ol' shoe?"

'E yawned at me, with those big teeths o' his. "Why, Mr. Nancy, you never asked."

So, I guess I gots me an extra ol' shoe now. If'n anyone be wantin' it, jus come an ask.

Hey, you crazy old man, ain't no one gonna buy some dead guy's boot!

Unless otherwise stated, the content of this page is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License