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Dr. Lee Roy Carlson is a biological researcher currently stationed at Site-17, though he's also worked at Site-77 in the past. His family calls him Leroy, his friends call him Elroy (L. Roy), his acquaintances call him Lee, Nobody calls him Roy, his enemies call him Carl, and his parents call him Son. His hot girlfriend1 calls him "baby", and she's the only one allowed to do that. He can be easily spotted by the red-and-blue floral-patterned bucket hat he wears whenever there's no one higher-ranking than him nearby, even though it's against the dress code. He owns a Scarlet macaw tastelessly named "King" (Get it? He's King the Scarlet! Wait, come back!), plays tenor saxophone, and slaughters puppies in a distressingly casual manner, but claims it's all in the name of science. Dr. Carlson's proudest achievement is the time he won a Foundation star for killing SCP-682. His greatest shame is the time his Foundation star was revoked when SCP-682 turned out not to be dead.

Dr. Carlson is not, nor has he ever been, affiliated with the Shark Punching Center in any way, shape, or form. He will continue saying it until you believe him. No one has ever once seen him punching a shark, and even if they did what of it? Lots of people hate sharks! They're dangerous and scary! Stop looking at him like that! He loves it here at the SPC!

No, please, he meant to say SCP, he swears! It's an easy mistake to make! Don't…

Dr. Carlson is currently unavailable. Please leave a message after the cognitohazard.


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