魂-S-2049 "Anima Back-Ups"
| Product # | Model | Quantity | Price |
|---|---|---|---|
| 魂-S-2049 | As01-α | 1 | ¥ 1,502,750,000 |
| 魂-S-2049 | As01-β | 1 | ¥ 1,505,800,000 |
Features
- Specially constructed somatic backups to house your anima.
- Each body, depending on the model, comes with the capability to perform alchemy or thaumaturgy.
- Purchase includes anima transfer fee.
- The body is compatible with Akiva radiation.
- Feels like your original body!
Specifications
- Currently, only Homo sapiens models are available, but Homo sapiens sidhe and Homo sapiens noctis compatibility are pending upcoming release.
- Orders can be customized to remove physical defects present in original soma, i.e, eyesight problems, deformities, etc.
- Orders can be customized to possess specifics as desired, i.e, physical sex, eye color, hair color, etc.
- NOT IMMUNE TO WASHINGTON VIRION. Please exercise caution if you believe you may be exposed to the virus again, as purchases are non-refundable.
unVeiled » Politics
Concerns Rise As JOICL Reveals New Product Aimed At Victims of Washington Virion
By Alice Sharp (⁂ASharp)
Published 05/03/2049, 11:30
Over 1.6 million civilians have been displaced in Washington D.C. following the outbreak of the Washington Virion.
Following the leak that Pentagram and JOICL worked together to create the biggest threat to the world since the Impasse over 20 years ago, it's been hard to see either as sincere in their actions. Though Pentagram has been mostly quiet, JOICL has been trying to save face as much as possible since the WPhO Special Assembly recently, where they announced their unyielding support for finding a cure for the virus they themselves created. Much to the chagrin of the average person, their newest product is also firmly outside the price range of the affected.
This, and a range of other factors have led to protests in the Pizzicato-affected United States…
Instructions: 魂-S-2048 “Anima Back-Ups” are a means of regaining one's ability to perform magic after suffering from the Washington Virion. Of course, those not magically inclined may also purchase the product as a way to begin learning how to use said magic.
“Anima Back-Ups” were developed using similar technology as Dr. Wondertainment's 'Little Misters' series of products. For the unfamiliar, The Little Misters are a children's band consisting of highly advanced homunculi created by the Dr. Wondertainment corporation in 1980. Members were named after their properties, leading to descriptor names such as 'Mr. Fish' or 'Mr. Brass'.
Despite this technology being proprietary (and deprecated by the parent company), JOICL was able to reverse engineer the soma and animacrafting necessary to reproduce a similar effect for the “Anima Back-Ups” line of products. JOICL was even fortunate enough to enroll one of the original Little Misters' engineers for the project. Please read further below in this document to learn more about him.
“Anima Back-Ups” are sold individually. Each instance is capable of either utilizing thaumaturgy or alchemy, depending on the model. It should be noted that though one will be immediately able to practice their magic following the anima transfer, they will not be able to perform to their full ability for a period estimated between 2-3 months. Attempts to go beyond basic magical spells in this period is not recommended, as it may destroy the soma.
As previously mentioned, “Anima Back-Ups” may be utilized by non-anomalous individuals to gain magical properties. If you are an individual purchasing the product for this purpose, please inform a sales representative, and they will direct you to the nearest ICSUT campus to your country.
- As01-α: Alchemy Model. Capable of manipulating æthers. Designed to specification.
- As01-β: Thaumaturgy Model. Capable of performing magic. Designed to specification.
Deer College Odyssey
The Buck Stops Here
| THREE PORTLANDS | FRIDAY, MARCH 11, 2049 | FREE OR ELSE |
JOICL RE-INVENTS EUGENICS?
UNETHICAL PRACTICES AND MORE!
Warning
“Anima Back-Ups” are not immune to the Washington Virion. This product is meant to allow individuals who have suffered from it the chance to recover their magical talents. Please do not squander your new lease on life by exposing yourself to the virus again!
Researcher’s Comment: I've seen a lot of things in my long life, but a second death of magic is two too many. That is why I am using my talents learned during my time with the Dr. Wondertainment Mistereering Department to help restore magic to the world. It's the least I could do. -Brainy Brian, JOICL Counter Washington Virion Division
≪Introduction to Brainy Brian's Achievements≫
1979 - Brainy Brian graduates from Wonder University in Wonder World™ and is immediately hired to the newly formed Mistereering Department.
1980 - The first Mister is created utilizing similar technology to “Anima Back-Ups”.
1998 - The Mistereering Department is shut down and the last Mister is made.
2001 - Brainy Brian is hired by Marshall, Carter, and Darke LTD to work on a similar product providing body doubles for clients.
2045 - Brainy Brian is offered more lucrative employment at JOICL and begins work to develop more advanced somatic/animatic backups.
2048 - Brainy Brian requests to be added to the JOICL Counter Washington Virion Division, citing his experience creating somas and manipulating animas as well as his projects to restore the ability to perform magic to clients.
Customer’s Voice:
- I purchased As01-α to become an alchemist. I have been reading about how to create a Philosopher's Stone and achieve immortality. I hope this period of hampered power passes quickly so I may begin my work. ― 68-years-old, male
- My daddy bought me As01-β as a birthday present because I wanted to learn how to do magic. I can't wait to go to Deer and party with all the cute Sidhe boys! ― 17-years-old, female
- As an MC&D Lounge Member, I love the luxurious delights of the world. However, I lacked the fire myself. Once I learned JOICL would be gifting the world with the ability to empower my dreams, I ran out and purchased As01-β. It's been wonderful so far. ― 27-years-old, male
- We used all our budget (and ran a donation drive) to buy a single instance of As01-β to assist our leader of the Washingtonian Virion Response Unit in North America in recovering from the virus, which she was exposed to following an altercation between herself and a rowdy infectee. Though it does work, won't you consider donating at least a few units to us? ― Manna Charitable Foundation
- Bought one for myself. Just as a treat. As01-β, I want to see what I've been missing out on. ― Palmer Luckey
antigamer aktion
⁂lesbian_gengar
i hate rich people as much as the next socialist, but there is no way that ⁂JOICL's new product can end well for them. fucking with the mind and soul like that is ung-dly.
- ECHOES 109
- HUMS 223
JOICL Official
⁂joicl
JOICL would like to inform the public that we are not aware of any side effects that 魂-S-2048 might have on one's anima. The product has been tested and has been found to be reliable and free of adverse affects. If this were not the case, we would not have released it.
- ECHOES 2356
- HUMS 569
bluntfiend
⁂jude_k2
⁂JOICL How can you be so sure? If hell is real, which my Catholic ass is afraid might be, I believe that whoever does this to themselves is going there for fucking with themselves like that. I understand that ⁂POTUS is an idiot and unleashed a second Impasse on us, but this is not the fucking answer.
- ECHOES 1
- HUMS 0
bluntfiend
⁂jude_k2
Oh and they're going to hell anyway for being millionaires. So I guess in the end it doesn't matter. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
- ECHOES 2
- HUMS 1
JOICL Official
⁂joicl
JOICL would like to state that we have been receiving reports of 魂-S-2049 yielding unexpected results in certain customers. Please stay tuned for updates.
- ECHOES 397
- HUMS 1221
harmpit
⁂gunch
tkae t he prodcut ffo teh marekt u idoits.
- ECHOES 463
- HUMS 6321
Palmer Luckey
⁂palmer_luckey_official
I HAVE SEEN HELL IT IS REAL
- ECHOES 12
- HUMS 20
antigamer aktion
⁂lesbian_gengar
lol
- ECHOES 151
- HUMS 39
Iris Dark
⁂irisdark
⁂palmer_luckey_official is arguably an even bigger idiot than ⁂POTUS Crenshaw for trusting ⁂JOICL after they created the very thing they are trying to profit off of. That's bad for optics, and even worse for business.
- ECHOES 99
- HUMS 402
bluntfiend
⁂jude_k2
Can't wait for the liberals to call this a "Girlboss moment for Iris Dark over JOICL". Ridiculous.
- ECHOES 5
- HUMS 12
Vanguard
⁂VanguardOfficial
New research into ⁂JOICL's 魂-S-2048 indicates anima transfer is highly dangerous. Vanguard recommends not purchasing this product and to instead follow ⁂WPhO safety instructions to prevent the spread of the #washingtonvirion.
- ECHOES 589
- HUMS 120
JOICL Official
⁂joicl
JOICL have indefinitely shelved the 魂-S-2049 product. Furthermore, the lead researcher behind it has been fired following an investigation into his background.
🙇♂️ 🙇♂️ 🙇♂️すみません. 🙇♂️ 🙇♂️ 🙇♂️
- ECHOES 501
- HUMS 1338
PEOPLEs Magazine Official
⁂peoplesmagazineofficial
⁂irisdark's #girlbossmoment over ⁂JOICL and more in this month's edition of ⁂peoplesmagazineofficial!!!!!
- ECHOES 1325
- HUMS 6988
