It's Just A Dream
rating: +110+x

"Hey. Up late? Thought you were off duty. What you got there?"

"Oh, I'm just going over the old reports from SCP-209 again. You know, the files it sticks on the thumb drive. Wanna watch with me?"

"The dream recorder? Heck yeah, I'd love to see those! Be right back, I'm going to want a beer with this. You want anything from 294?"

"I'll take a scotch."

"Ha! I'd never have thought you a scotch drinker."

"…Crap. Okay, yeah, I'll have the scotch. It's a 209 thing."

"Um, okay. But like, why'd you need hard liquor? It's not like anyone's been hurt by 209. It just sits there and records. Safe as can be. You lucked out for a first assignment."

"True. But you'll see. Here, this first one is what was on the drive when we found the SCiP."


You find yourself in a room with wood paneling, a large lit marble fireplace, two mahogany side tables, and two red velvet-upholstered wingback chairs. On the walls are various hunting trophies, comprising deer, Komodo dragon, cat, and human. On one side table is a chess game, set up at the beginning of play. On the other side table is a tumbler of a golden-brown liquid, under a glass bell jar.

With you is a young man, Caucasian, skinny, with short light brown hair. He looks at you, smiles with familiarity, and laughs triumphantly, stating, "It works! It works!" Another figure emerges from the shadows in the corner of the room, a butler, no, his features are too perfect, too standardized. A cartoon of a butler. The butler states, "Welcome to your dream. Please, be seated. In this portion of the dream, you will play a game of chess. The winner shall have the opportunity to drink this glass of fine scotch." He then stiffly returns to the shadows.

You and the young man sit and play the game of chess. He moves his piece wrong. Very quickly, you win the game and the butler reappears and removes the bell jar. "Your drink, ma'am," the butler intones. You accept your prize and drink. It is scotch.

The young man becomes agitated as you sip your scotch. "This is my dream. I made this machine, this is my dream! I should have won the game! Where's my scotch?"

The butler snorts and replies, "You are out of line, my dear fellow," and a rusty iron cage descends from shadows at the ceiling, capturing the young man. "I don't like the tone of your voice," the butler adds. He clears his throat and adds, "What shall I do with the riff raff, ma'am?"

Your mind fills with anger at the young man's arrogance and whining. You reply, "Make him a toy, smaller. Shrink the cage."

The butler replies, "Very good, ma'am." The cage starts shrinking, and the surroundings shift to become the quad at your university. The young man starts hunching over in his confined space, complaining of the pain and continuing to state that he made the machine, everything should be his. Annoying little jerk. Other people in the quad approach you, all smiling and fawning, asking about your new toy. The cage shrinks smaller than dimensions necessary to contain a human, but the young man is still inside, crushing his body into a catlike animal. His agonizing screams become shriller and more rhythmic, crying out every three seconds, but everyone else continues to gush over the quickly diminishing toy.

Tired of his wailing, you pick up the cage and squeeze. A wet-sounding crunch is heard, and the cage, now the size of a packet of cigarettes, contains a small, unidentifiable mass of tissue. It is thankfully silent. The butler appears again and intones, "Thank you, ma'am. I shall dispose of the cage for you. Good morning."

You wake, refreshed.

Closing Remarks:

SCP-209 was recovered from a makeshift sleep lab in the basement of the Biomedical Engineering department building of ███████ University. The thumb drive attached to the computer component of SCP-209 was found to have a single file, "imadethisyoubitch.m4a".

Subject was L███ G██████, (23 years old, female, Han Chinese ancestry). Upon interview, subject confirmed that this was her dream while attached to SCP-209. She did not know who built the device, nor how it appeared in the basement. She did not suffer any other ill effects and had a healthy psychological profile, and so she was given a Class B amnestic and released.

Researchers note that SCP-209 is designed to handle two subjects simultaneously, and recommend that future experimentation should be done with two subjects.

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