How to Summon A God (Safely)

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The following document was discovered during the initial raid of SCP-████. The origin of the document is currently unknown. No other contextually relevant documents were found during the raid, and the Foundation has determined that this document is not of great significance. Despite this, RAISA has added the document to the SCPF Database due to the circumstances of acquisition.

A Step by Step Guide to Summoning Divine Entities

Bringing a deity into your realm is a dangerous task. To toy with the gods is a fool's errand.

But sometimes a fool is just what the people need.

If divine intervention is required, obey the following. These rules are not enforced, just absolutely crucial.

1. A Promise
Why would a god try to help a mere mortal? Because they have something the god wants. You must have something the entity wants, or they will not take kindly to you. Whether it be a sacrifice, a soul, a blade, or anything in between, it doesn't matter. All that matters is that you give it a reason to do what you want it to. Otherwise, it won't show up.

A god has desires. Take advantage of them.

2. A Threat
Deities are very selfish. If you have something it wants, and a task before the reward, what is stopping it from taking a shorter route? You are. Make sure it will be sorry if it disobeys. Make them know that messing with you is a bad idea.

A god will only listen when they're staring down a rifle's barrel.

3. A Tight Cage
Your threats do not matter when its true form is showing. There's a reason that gods only show in a vessel: the worlds where they don't never last very long. A god can destroy whole subcontinents when confined to a mere pile of gears. Make sure that its vessel is much weaker than you are.

A god bound by chains will not end the world.

4. A Lack of Faith
The divine thrives on belief. Do not believe. Gods are strong enough as is; they will get the job done. Do not fuel their fire, you will just burn. If you have faith in them, they will not succeed.

A god not believed in cannot fight back.

5. A View of the Sky
No matter how much you try, the world still may end. That is the risk you are taking. When the end is nigh, make sure you can see the sky. Every time you see the stars, you know you've made it another day. To stay in a box is to lose all hope. The god should be in that box, not you.

A god feeds on fear. Make sure you have hope.

6. A Two-Way Ticket
Do not let the god stay in your realm. That is very unwise. You cannot just let them in, you must also kick them out. With time, the divine grows accustomed to their surroundings. They will learn how to use them, and you'll be their first target.

A god cannot stay, even if they ask nicely.

7. A Plan-B
No amount of preparation can ensure your survival. The world has ways to fix itself, but even those can't be trusted. You need a backup. Another dimension, the Non-Believer's Spear, a time machine, anything. Do not trust that the prior steps will protect you.

A god can easily put you in checkmate. Always hold a match, so you can light the board on fire.

8. An Entrance
A deity's mere arrival could set the world ablaze. Make sure they have a way to get here that won't tear the fabric of reality. A door will not do.

A god is like foreign bacteria. Our world is not used to its presence, and not ready to handle it.

9. A Disguise
People will notice this being. There is nothing you can do to stop that. Try to make the entity as unassuming as possible. If people notice that a god is in their presence, bad things will happen. Mask the divine, make the public think it mundane. A mass religious crisis will not help you get your job done.

A god will want to make its presence known. Do not let it.

10. A Damn Good Reason
Don't just summon a god because you can. If doing that was fine, I wouldn't be writing this in a bunker. The chance of failure is great, and the stakes are unreasonably high. Only do this if absolutely necessary. I would tell you that it is never worth it, but that would be a lie. No one would listen anyway. I'm running out of time. I can only hope someone finds this, anyone. Don't let what happened to me happen to you.

A god can end the world. Don't let that happen.

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