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Item: SCP-001-A
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-001-A is to be kept under constant surveillance at Soundproofed Warehouse 10 of the Large Anomaly Containment Wing at Site-59. Personnel conducting routine maintenance checks must use level 3B 5A 7A 26M ear protection at all times.
Description: SCP-001-A is a 13.59 m x 2.44 m x 2.9 m shipping container. Its exterior has been reinforced with an unknown substance that, to date, has completely withstood all attempts to cut through.
Save for the presence of SCP-001-A-1, it is identical in appearance and, presumably, function to SCP-001. However, the fact that the bulkhead has been permanently closed from within makes usage as a backup for SCP-001 non-viable.
SCP-001-A-1 is a flat metallic device, 2.1 m in height and 0.9 m in width. The text "SCP-FNA"1 has been painted on the surface. Through unknown means, it has been permanently affixed to the right wall of SCP-001-A's "cockpit." Whether or not SCP-001-A-1 has "phased into" the wall is unknown.
SCP-001-A-2 denotes 57 (so far) identical humanoid entities of indeterminate gender, intelligence, and identity. Tissue samples taken from SCP-001-A-2 display both human and bovine DNA.
SCP-001-A-3 denotes a pocket-dimensional space accessible through SCP-001-A-1. Following Incident-001-A-0, it is inaccessible.
Addendum 1 — Incident-001-A-0: On 9/1/22 at 1050 GMT, the bulkhead to SCP-001-A suddenly closed from within. Concurrently, all contained instances of SCP-001-A-2 died instantaneously through unknown means.
Five minutes later, SCP-001-A began emitting a constant piercing noise from within. Though SCP-001-A's exterior has muffled the sound considerably, the noise has maintained a consistent volume of ███ dB.
The sound vaguely resembles an old man screaming.
Addendum 2 — Inactivity: On 10/13/25, the noise stopped for 17 minutes and five seconds…
BOOT SEQUENCE INITIATED - BACKAWAY BIOS (c) 1996 PROMETHEUS LABS
WELCOME, [USER].
THE CURRENT DATE IS OCTOBER 13TH, 2025 CE.
!! <3 HAPPY COLUMBUS DAY <3 !!
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO DO TODAY?
>RUN_WORDPROCESS
item #: scp-ubu
object class: iscariot
special containment procedures: though strong evidence points to the conclusion that i have failed in the task i set out to do just under ten million years ago, there is a chance that
i mean
all things considered, there
i
the plan is to keep yelling and in doing so a higher power will one day take pity on me and bring back an scp-ubu-2 that isnt allergic to fucking twigs and im going to be the one who gets to kill and punish ubu
maybe not pity though
that would mean i havent earned it
ok new plan
the strength of my willpower via several aeons of screaming will manifest the aforementioned scp-ubu-2 into existence like that one book "the secret" or whatever
then thatll be a good day
i will win
i wont have to scream anymore
…
looking back i suppose its only natural
this ubuless world holds no joy for me
struggle without killing torture without satisfaction conflict without resolution
hatred without an outlet
no one left to direct it toward but myself
…
my laboratory is cold
somebody please put a blanket over me
…
i could use a distraction
> SAVE
UNTITLED1.TXT SAVED.
HEY, [USER]. FILE [UNTITLED1.TXT] DISPLAYS EVIDENCE OF SEVERE DOWN-IN-THE-DUMPSITUDE! PROMETHEUS LABS CARES ABOUT YOUR MENTAL HEALTH. WHY NOT TAKE A BREAK AND PLAY A VIDEO GAME? JUST TYPE "RUN_STWINKY" TO JOIN (*~THE HUNT FOR MR. STWINKY!*~) AFTER ALL, STWINKYLAND NEEDS YOU TO CATCH THAT SNEAKY MR. STWINKY BEFORE HE MISSES PRINCESS PWANKY'S BIRTHDAY PARTY!
> RUN_STWINKY
_ _ _ _ - _ _ _ _ - _ _ _ _ - _ _ _ _
PLEASE ENTER THE 16-DIGIT CODE FOUND ON THE BACK OF THE PROVIDED STWINKAGE KIT TO PROVE THAT THIS IS A LEGITIMATE COPY OF (*~THE HUNT FOR MR. STWINKY!*~)
The sound has since continued.
