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Your mistaking a collapsible and a link here. That is a link, not a collapsible. The new URL it takes you to is a supplement page that was created separately from the 096 page.


j.w

Remember clinical tone. Instead of "eating" time, say that he is the focal point of a temporal sink, or something similar.

eat was just a term for the elevator pitch, wasn't intending to use that in the article, was thinking something like 'emits a hyperentropic field' or something like that.

The anomaly feels like a cheap way to get pity points. While it makes sense, people can easily guess the direction of the story once reading the description

Hmm, now that you bring it up it does sound a bit 'bread and butter' plain story. Maybe I could subvert expectations in an attached incident report of a site-wide containment breach, they could find several corpses of guards in an extremely emaciated and aged state and his 'field' of ageing is a bit larger now? Although maybe I should remove the attached journal because I feel 3 attachments is a bit too much + the plothole you mentioned.

How will he have a journal if his powers age everything, including the journal? How will you have an interview with him, especially since even the interviewer and the microphone and whathaveyous are rotting.

Admittedly, the journal is a bit of a plothole on examination, though for the interview I planned to explain it was done via speakers and long-range microphones in the containment cell. Though I should probably clarify that a bit more in the pitch.

Thanks a lot for your advice! This is my first attempt at writing something on the wiki so your feedback is really valuable!

Summoned via PM.

Good luck, and feel free to PM me again if you have any further questions or otherwise need help!

An easy +1 from me. A great perspective on a simple concept (wishes being granted), exploring the idea that a person getting what they want is often not best for everyone else. Nice!

by Nathaniel PrimeNathaniel Prime, 17 Sep 2021 09:14

The real horror here isn't who these people were, how circular their bureaucracy and society are (although that was a fascinating concept), or how much they've dosed themselves into forgetting.

The real horror is what's implied by our representative here's so-called dream, which I doubt was much of a dream at all.

by react0rmanreact0rman, 17 Sep 2021 09:13

Seeking Greenlights: Yes

Page Type: SCP Article

Genre: Drama/Emotional

Elevator Pitch: A woman who, upon dying, vanishes and reappears completely healed and unharmed in any potential location and time frame, the only real "rule" being she can't be seen manifesting into a new setting (along with the addition that she only manifests in areas and time frames populated with other people, though of course that's more for narrative purposes).
She has no control over where or when she shows up, though she isn't afraid to take her own life if she finds her current location isn't a favorable one for whatever reason.
Despite the uncertainty of when or where she'll reappear, she's very aware of her anomalous abilities and takes action to not cause potential paradoxes or reveal her anomaly to the general public while still wanting to live each of her lives out to the fullest.

Central Narrative: SCP-XXXX quite literally just showed up inside of the facility after one of its many deaths (which I would like to elaborate more on in the actual article). Upon realizing it's now located in some sort of research facility, it attempts to escape but is very easily apprehended and questioned. After a brief explanation of her abilities, it's contained in a cell equipped with a SRA and interviewed further.
During (only mentioned) interviews it talks about its many "past/future lives", at first joking around and telling more entertaining tales before eventually delving into more traumatic experiences (such as the time it contracted the bubonic plague, leading it to develop germaphobic tendencies).
While the foundation can't exactly tell whether or not the teleporting and time travel elements of her powers are legitimate without straight-up murder, they do find out it can essentially revive itself if "killed" while it's in containment. This incident dramatically changes SCP-XXXX's behavior when it realizes its abilities are neutralized.

Hook/Attention-Grabber: After a failed suicide attempt to escape the foundation (killing itself inside its chamber, only to "wake back up" unharmed when eyesight was taken off of it as the SRA wouldn't let it teleport to a new location), SCP-XXXX has an existential crisis. All it has ever known since its first death that dying would take it somewhere else, relatively safe and sound.
As long as researches keep it in this little cell, is this what the rest of this life is going to be? Imprisoned? SCP-XXXX is conflicted, because, yes, containment here somewhat ensures it'll be safe from many aspects of the outside world that give it anxiety, this isn't a fulfilling way to live. It doesn't age, either, so it could practically be contained here for the rest of time.

Additional Notes: I want to make it clear I'm focusing less on "whoa cool person with superpowers" and more on the existential fear she experiences of spending an eternity in containment. I want to make an interesting narrative, not a comic book character. I've read the guide for making humanoid SCPs about a dozen times and looked through many low-rated humanoid SCP articles to see how other people went wrong, but I'm still anxious I'm walking right into the same pitfalls.
This also plays into a lot of my own fears concerning death, the concept of reincarnation and immortality so I'm very passionate about this idea and really want to make it work.
I'll say I'm not sure if the logistics with the SRA line up quite well (would it be able to prevent teleportation but also allow her to pretty much come back from the dead?), and generally any and all other feedback is appreciated as this is my very first SCP. Thank you in advance!

at times rather drawn out but absolutely worth it in the end

by RhettyBoyRhettyBoy, 17 Sep 2021 09:02

To recover the parts of Mekhane


Doctor GD's files

Wow an Ambrose branch with Filipino food! Immediately upvoting cause I got that Filipino-American pride! +1

by Dr AsteriaDr Asteria, 17 Sep 2021 08:50

At the end of addendum 1 there’s a minor spelling error in the line “ Due to the friendly relationship between the local Hutsuls and SCP-6360, they have be allowed to stay in the containment areas.” where I think it should say they have “been allowed” instead of “be allowed”? Other than this I loved it :)

+1 by LoglegendLoglegend, 17 Sep 2021 08:50
Machen2Machen2 17 Sep 2021 08:42
in discussion Per Page Discussions / Per page discussions » SCP-6047

Thanks! Happy you enjoyed.


disclaimer:everything here is my opinion.

by Machen2Machen2, 17 Sep 2021 08:42

To add on to what ZynZyn said, the reason why we know very little about black holes is because they're fundamentally difficult to find.

Stars are characterized by the emission of light particles, and we've been trained to spot light for millennias. Black holes are characterized by the exact opposite. The only reason we can predict the size of a black hole is by watching the orbits of objects around that black hole, and estimate it's size.

We know of millions of stars, but we only know with certainty about a couple dozen black holes, and we've been searching for at least fifty years.

Even if there is an anomaly, humanity would have no way of telling.


bloop

Articles should be able to standalone. You should focus on actually making a working article as opposed to expanding on the idea via separate articles.

I'm also… not sure this narrative jives? Which branch of the CotBG are you talking about? Why do they want to grant people wishes? What does that have to do with MEKHANE?

It just doesn't make much sense to me, personally.


bloop

The Foundation didn’t give up with finding it’s origins, and they’ll manage to get a tracker put on it when it assists a foundation employee for a third time. The hand is part of another anomaly I will create called the people’s wishes. A machine created by the Church of the Broken God who makes anomalies that fulfill the wishes of a large amount of people. They wanted to make it to wish for the parts of the broken god, but it’s anomalous power spread globally and it created anomalies based on the people’s wishes.


Doctor GD's files

Downvoted, because the only way to find the hidden stuff (which the article falls flat without) is to go into the comments section and sift through a bunch of comments. Hidden stuff is cool in general, but it is so immersion-breaking in horror skips like this one that it kills the effect. It could be much better if you could just read the whole thing without needing to click on something you can't even see.

by Nathaniel PrimeNathaniel Prime, 17 Sep 2021 07:54

These were things that I wanted to expand upon in the article since some reviewers review articles with lower characters


Doctor GD's files

There's no easy way to find this out. All I can do is point at my own crits and say I give out maybe 3 greenlights a week? I may be overestimating here.

Unless you begin digging through old posts, there's no way to tell greenlights, especially since some greenlights come in their non-greenlight form.


bloop

Re: Greenlight Frequency by Fish^12Fish^12, 17 Sep 2021 07:32

I'm not too sure what else I can do so I'll scrap the idea.

Thanks for the help so far.

Also summoned via PM.

This doesn't do anything other SCPs haven't already done. For SCP articles, there's the pataphysical meta-commentary just recently, SCP-6294. And I'm pretty sure there's a -J article that plays with this exact concept, but I can't really remember it at the moment.

The narrative also leaves too much to be desired. It tries to make the anomaly carry the whole article, but the anomaly simply isn't funny or complex enough to warrant that.


bloop

Re: [Seeking greenlight] TL;DR by Fish^12Fish^12, 17 Sep 2021 07:13
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