SCP-4511 / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page SCP-4511.

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DrDog Makes Rounderhouse Write An SCP With Him, Volume 1

DrAnnoyingDog 10 Jan 2019 14:17

This is a collaboration between Rounderhouse and myself for Cliche Con 2019. Our entry uses an anomaly cliche: Compulsion, and a story element cliche: PoI gets one up on the Foundation.

So, this is my first scip! Which means I'm a real author now. Now rounder can stop yelling at me. Speaking of rounder, this wouldn't be a thing without him! He did most of the work, and I'm taking the credit! I'm just joking, this is a mutual credit-taking.

Thanks to everyone who critiqued this!

• Elogee FishTruck
• RockTeethMothEyes
• MacWarren
• gishface
• Kakroom
• OthellotheCat
• A Random Day
• magnadeus
• YossiLeiner
• mayoculpa

I hope you enjoy our Swine God!

Last edited on 10 Jan 2019 23:29 by DrAnnoyingDog Show more

SWINE FOR THE SWINE THRONE

Rounderhouse 10 Jan 2019 14:19

It was a ton of fun writing this with my pal DrAnnoyingDog! It was mostly us yelling at each other about how to write test logs, but fun nonetheless. Thank you to all of our valued critters, and I hope you enjoy our Swiney Boi.

Image: Flickr, Library of Congress; https://www.flickr.com/photos/library_of_congress/2179139231

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More From Me!

Last edited on 14 Jan 2019 02:37 by Rounderhouse Show more

Cliche Con Entry

aismallard 10 Jan 2019 16:52

Fyi, this is a Category 1 Category 3 submission.

Edit: they changed their category

Last edited on 11 Jan 2019 00:32 by aismallard Show more

MrPines 10 Jan 2019 14:35

hey this is pretty good

Rounderhouse 11 Jan 2019 02:28

You're pretty good!

fishingenthusiast 10 Jan 2019 14:39

First non 4-Bars poster!
This is pretty good but I still feel like it’s just body horror for the sake of body horror. Hesitant but solid +1.

MrPines 10 Jan 2019 15:04

youll get ur big 4 soon pbub

DrAnnoyingDog 10 Jan 2019 15:08

If I can get four bars, anyone can.

Rounderhouse 10 Jan 2019 15:29

more like 4 barks amirite

laugh track

aismallard 10 Jan 2019 16:52

smh rounderhouse

ResearcherSheppard 10 Jan 2019 15:30

imagine having less than 4 bars

wait a sec

ghouligan 18 Feb 2019 22:30

imagine having bars

:(

DarkGalaxy 11 Nov 2022 17:40

imagine…

Woedenaz 11 Feb 2019 00:15

This is pretty good but I still feel like it’s just body horror for the sake of body horror.

Well that just seems patently incorrect. There's way more going on in this than just body horror.

IAmTheOoga 10 Jan 2019 15:06

This is like Piccolo and Goku teaming up for the first time to fight Raditz. Never thought I'd see you two mooks collaborating, but it turned out great!

Big fan of the Raw Hog Power.

Last edited on 10 Jan 2019 19:12 by IAmTheOoga Show more

Rounderhouse 10 Jan 2019 15:29

Dunno how we got this far without challenging each other to a duel, but we did it!

mayoculpa 10 Jan 2019 15:08

SWINE FOR THE SWINE GOD!

\o/

shut up and take my oils. and my +1

Rounderhouse 11 Jan 2019 02:23

CURRENT DEMAND

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Upvotes - SATISFIED

Last edited on 03 Feb 2019 09:54 by Rounderhouse Show more

stormfallen 12 Jan 2019 21:39

OILS FOR THE OIL THRONE!

ResearcherSheppard 10 Jan 2019 15:26

this is without a doubt the most enjoyable scp ive read in an extremely long time.

thanks dudes, stay golden.

DrAnnoyingDog 11 Jan 2019 02:27

I'm glad you liked it, Luke. Thanks for reading!

(account deleted) 10 Jan 2019 15:44

+ show block

It is well-written by skilled authors and is absolutely a complete, intelligently constructed piece.

But sometimes I must remind myself that hovering my cursor over the vote buttons prompts me to say if I like it, which is different. And well:

"A youth to grow in the factories."
Due to noncompliance, subject was forced into SCP-4511 using an electric shock prod.

Just… just hell fucking no fam. I get the point of the over-the-top gross Foundation actions to illustrate the compulsion at play, but I can't get with this.

Edit: Along the lines of "cold, not cruel" I also wonder why they are stabbing subjects with cattle prods instead of restraining them. They just need to be thrown in there.

Last edited on 10 Jan 2019 16:21 by (account deleted) Show more

serpentrose 10 Jan 2019 16:47

Pretty sure that was due to the compulsion effect.

(account deleted) 10 Jan 2019 16:53

Which is precisely why I said, before my edit even:

I get the point of the over-the-top gross Foundation actions to illustrate the compulsion at play, but I can't get with this.

The gross shit that makes this narrative work (and it does work; I'm not bashing the whole piece) would be just as relevant without using child abuse as a Big Oof. IMO of course.

Edit: If you were referring to what I edited in, rather, then I can't tell. The people running the tests seem to be capable of referring to each other by their names/designations and otherwise acting normal — just other than the drive to throw stuff in the pig. I feel like their procedures would not be affected, but I don't see a way to know for sure.

Last edited on 10 Jan 2019 18:10 by (account deleted) Show more

coachskau 23 Jan 2019 20:57

The thing about perception is, if everybody around you is thinking the same way, nobody is going to say "Hang on, something isn't right here." It just doesn't cross anyone's mind to question it.

That's what I thought while reading this, anyway.

mayoculpa 10 Jan 2019 17:33

I'm embarrassed to say this did not even trip my radar while critting. But now that you bring it up, I can definitely see the objection.

I have a notion which would provide a fairly clean workaround. (Though it's up to rounder and dog if they are interested in using this or some other idea here — the article as-is is clearly succeeding!)

WHAT IF

In the current "Test 8", the "Resources" box is redacted, implying they went out an got an actual child. If instead, that box said "Researcher XXX, the youngest member of the containment team", this could theoretically still qualify as a youth. Or at least, the most youthful person who was immediately available to the team.

Now, I'd interpreted Tests 6 and 7 to mean the swine god was displeased with the offering given to it in Test 6, that is, an already-deceased person. It retaliated against this insult by being exceptionally cruel to the person in Test 7, by making them suffer for hours before they died.

Test 9 is already pretty horrific — 450 kilograms is just under 1000 pounds of coal. Being manually shoveled by two people. That's a hellacious amount of shoveling. And after and/or during all that shoveling, one of the researchers is burned to death while the other is severely injured.

So if the change were made, one could easily interpret the nastiness of Test 9 as the swine god's retaliation for being given merely a somewhat youthful researcher rather than the actual child it demanded in Test 8.

(account deleted) 10 Jan 2019 18:04

I think this is a good idea, and if implemented I'd switch to a novote, or potential upvote if I sort out my thoughts on the general Foundation behavior in this (compulsion or no compulsion, they seem to have no order at all in succumbing to this thing and it's an overwhelming amount of chaos).

DrAnnoyingDog 10 Jan 2019 18:26

Neither I nor my coauthor have any intention of changing the test log.

Last edited on 10 Jan 2019 18:45 by DrAnnoyingDog Show more

Uncle Nicolini 10 Jan 2019 15:46

I'm willing to throw my upvote at this, though I feel the ending was anticlimactic. I enjoyed it enough, even though I wish it were ended a little better.

Rounderhouse 11 Jan 2019 02:29

Mhm. I had my doubts about the ending as well, but I'm satisfied with how it came out. Thank you!

OthellotheCat 10 Jan 2019 16:00

That’ll do pig

That’ll do

Rounderhouse 11 Jan 2019 02:30

SWINE GOD 2: GET OUTTA MY FACTORY

MightyR 06 Apr 2019 13:17

GET OUT
OF MY FACTORY
NOOOOOOOOW

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ole yeeyee headass

ratking666 10 Jan 2019 16:05

DEMAND

A double triple bossy deluxe, on a raft, four by four animal style, extra shingles with a shimmy and a squeeze, light axle grease, make it cry, burn it, and let it swim.

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pastarasta1 is quick-talking and often scheming

Last edited on 11 Jan 2019 04:26 by ratking666 Show more

MrPines 10 Jan 2019 16:50

We serve FOOD here, sir.

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