New SCP. Open to critiques and comments.
SCP-1167 / Discussion
Forum
» Per Page Discussions / Per page discussions
» SCP-1167
This is the discussion related to the wiki page SCP-1167.
At first i thought it was a portal turret, but this is much more interesting. Also that picture is adorable. +1.
Whether you like it or not, history is on our side. We will bury you!
Thanks. :) This is the first SCP I've created that was written to match a picture I found.
I preferred it when it could control electronics, but this is good as well.
Upvoted.
I'll probably use that idea for a different SCP. After numerous revisions I realized it was an unnecessary ability to tell the story I had in mind. It was bloating the article.
You, sir, earnt my respect with just that post.
Is hard for people, while writing, to notice what parts are actually JUST fluff, and get rid of them.
You knew it wasn't needed, cut it out, and left it simple and effective…
… wish I could multi-upvote, just 'cause you included Chile :3
I like it! It's got just enough details to lead you to a backstory, but not enough to force one on you. +1.
I'm curious what backstory people are picking up from what's there. Mind telling me? I'm keeping the actual one to myself for now.
I got some kind of robot team from an alien planet and/or the future foundation tracking another SCP that has escaped, only the escaped SCP evaded them and/or robomurdered them all.
*EDIT*
Also, upvoted because I enjoyed this one.
I like it.
If you'd added any extra abilities to it (especially techno-control powers, sorry Adam), you'd have ruined it, but what you have here works perfectly fine for me.
If it arrived here on an object that created the Montaraqui crater about 660,000 years ago, why does it speak our languages?
It's uncertain how long it's been trapped, and how much time prior to that was spent in contact with human cultures.
Sorry, but… I don't quite get it. Not downvoting since it's interesting and well-written, but I can't really upvote until I know or figure out what it's getting at.
if your reading this your gay
The hook isn't supposed to be the SCP itself, but the mystery of whatever happened to cause it to be in its current state.
I like the fact that it is simple, a bit funny, and straight to the point. It easily drives at the fact that not every SCP needs to be a big deal, awe-inspiring, or terrifying. Sometimes weird little trinkets are going to show up as well, and there is a lot of room for the reader to fill in why it exist and what its purpose may be.
/forum/t-474212/scp-1167#post-
page revision: 2, last edited: 15 Jan 2023 15:06
