SCP-3513 / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page SCP-3513.

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psul 13 Jul 2017 07:19

Do you notice the space you walk through every day?
Have you ever felt like there was an itch inside your head?
Do you ever think about what is going on there, deep inside, where you can't go or even see?

This is a story about how the Foundation doesn't always know why things happen. It is kind of a thematic sequel to SCP-2365.

Many thanks to MrWrong for feedback on the forums. The image is from Wikipedia here, by mdomingoa, and is on a CC-by-SA 4.0 licence.

ETA: if you came here from the features page, and enjoyed this, why not check out my other SCPs and tales. You can find them at my author page.

Last edited on 02 Oct 2017 21:41 by psul Show more

Voct 10 Oct 2017 21:16

To be clear, it's here.

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Leatherback_turtle_oesophagus.jpg

TL333s 13 Jul 2017 12:26

What in the fuck.

Just thoroughly unsettling, good body horror, good exploration giving it more dimension. WHY BRAIN BEAKS WHY

RJB_R 13 Jul 2017 12:57

The main description is great, perfectly striking a balance between the bizarre and logic. The second test log is the strongest one, the line " Mr Miller had suffered a stroke, presumed to be caused by the sudden appearance of the camera within his brain." was my upvote moment. I think the conclusion was a little weak, I think you could cut the other logs without losing much and making the really good one even stronger.

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Whether you like it or not, history is on our side. We will bury you!

psul 03 Nov 2017 09:53

I've been thinking about this quite a lot, and I've finally deciphered why I didn't end with the first log. I think that the "pops up in someone else's brain" idea, while it has some punch (and clearly has the most punch for some readers), is probably the "expected twist" for this site. It is one obvious direction to take the anomaly, based on a wormhole within a brain, it is horrific but a little bit jokey - it fits very well within the site aesthetic all round (it is exactly how the Series I version of this skip would have ended, I think - maybe I would add that the unfortunate Mr Miller had taken a pill labelled "increase your brain matter").

I wanted this one to zag slightly when the reader expected it to zig. That's why I wanted the brain-to-brain test to be the first - to get it out of the way, and leave the reader a little more in the dark about where the skip was going. And I wanted the ending to be horrible and inexplicable, with essentially no jokiness at all.

It may not be the right answer, but I thought it was worth explaining why I made the writing choice.

Scorpion451 13 Jul 2017 14:41

Well this is different.

Disagreeing with Roget on cutting the other two logs (and noting that I think he meant the first one was the strongest one). Log 1 does set the stage, but log 2 establishes that it's not human exclusive and 3 ups the weirdness in an interesting way that leaves me with a lot of questions about this (these?) critter's biology…

DrBleep 13 Jul 2017 16:36

I…holy shit. I don't have any words. I literally don't have words. Not many things get a visceral horrified reaction from me, but this? This most certainly did. +1

(account deleted) 13 Jul 2017 16:53

I semi-agree with Roget. Although I actually really love the whole wtf?!?!-ery of the last log involving the heated nickel, I feel like if you had ended with the first log, you could have easily made this extremely short with just as much impact. And I love incredibly short, powerful articles.

That being said, that's largely just a nitpick: The premise is fantastic, the writing is exquisitely well-polished, and the delivery is delightfully disturbing.

ETA: For reference, you had my +1 instantly at "the beak slowly ingests brain tissue".

Last edited on 13 Jul 2017 16:56 by (account deleted) Show more

jjone 13 Jul 2017 17:12

Although I was born and raised in Windhoek, I've thankfully evaded this monstrosity.

psul 14 Jul 2017 08:46

Windhoek was selected as part of the "fill up the map" challenge - South West Africa was relatively anomaly-free.

darth dxVxb 13 Jul 2017 18:25

Testing discontinued? Back in my day the foundation woulda shrunk a MTF and sent them down there!

Also how does meat from nambia end up in Italy. I'm sure it can but it's quite a stretch. (Just ignoring the fact that a beak in your brain isn't)

SpectralDragon 13 Jul 2017 20:08

Goats. I don't actually know if Namibia exports goats to Italy, but that's the most likely one.

psul 14 Jul 2017 08:35

Actually, my intention was to suggest that there are other areas of space (in Italy, in Wisconsin) which create similar effects. Some poor Italian cow might have passed through one on the way to the slaughterhouse.

Marly Kaxon 13 Jul 2017 19:22

"Unnecessary brain tissue was removed…" +1

Genshed 13 Jul 2017 19:39

"The world is so full of a number of things/
I'm sure that we all should be happy as kings."
Robert Louis Stevenson had no idea what he was talking about.

The microscopic examination of the Land Beyond the Beak was enthralling. Knowing that the D-class was conscious during the procedure was lagniappe.

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