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Thanks to Conwell, Cimmerian, GibberingEloquence, steeltitan and others for looking over this draft.
Image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Caravans_at_beer_devon_arp.jpg
[[module Rate]]
Item #: SCP-2379
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: Scp-2379 is to be contained in a 12 by 12 containment cell. Scp-2379 is in the extreme containment zone
Description: SCP-2379 is a large snake.
Addendum:
Whether you like it or not, history is on our side. We will bury you!
It's sad that we'll never know what made that large snake so special.
Onto business: I want to get into this, but there are so many weird bits that seem inconsistent or don't go anywhere that I can't feel it's very well-constructed, unless I'm just misinterpreting the whole thing.
If a single instance can reproduce into several hundred instances via high winds, why does the other reproduction method happen, and why haven't they taken over the world already?
These buildings will be disassembled by fibrous fungus, and the materials apparently used to produce structures such as hotels, motels, boarding homes, condominiums, and small businesses with residences.
Okay, so they build things. Where? Just, on the ground in the middle of the city? Are the things they build also 2379 instances, or do they just arrive, turn buildings into different buildings, and then leave? Why? Why do the containment procedures make no note of how to contain an outbreak of moving buildings that attack cities?
Once the SCP-2379 infestation has used all the available construction materials, it will begin moving towards the next largest urban population center and repeat the process. There is no known upper limit on the size that SCP-2379 infestations can reach.
So, once it starts attacking cities, it'll just keep attacking cities. Do the people trapped inside just die of thirst? Again, you never specify whether or not they're using buildings to build more of themselves. It seems to be implied, but then that raises several additional questions, since the first half of the description implies that they're made of fungus but they're just home-shaped.
Are they entirely fungus or are they actual homes made of plaster and metal, just with fungus inside? If the former, how/why are they building more buildings? If the latter, how do they disappear in high winds?
And, if they go on a city-disassembling spree, why are there no specific containment procedures on how to deal with that? At the very least, that's something that would receive immediate national attention, and then probably a very extensive attack and coverup operation.
I want to like the idea here, but there are just so many issues in logic here that I'm left confused as to what these things are or do.
EDIT: Most of the issues addressed in the collapsible have since been fixed.
Tried to make a few edits to address those concerns, how does it look now?
Whether you like it or not, history is on our side. We will bury you!
It's definitely better, but there's one bit that still reads weird:
These may be built directly into existing buildings
If I'm interpreting this correctly, the 2379 instances walk to a city, disassemble buildings in the city, and then build more buildings onto themselves, gradually turning into a mobile, cobbled-together supercomplex, correct? If that is in fact what's going on, this phrasing confused me quite a lot, because "existing buildings" seemed to refer to buildings existing in the population center, not in the 2379 group. That could probably be fixed, if my interpretation is correct.
Otherwise, most of the issues of readability I've had have been fixed. I'll collapse my post, since, you know, the very first thing a reader sees in the discussion page probably shouldn't be a list of things that have already been fixed.
Huh. This has changed quite a bit between draft versions.
I dig this. I like the idea of these fungal communities rapidly dispersing and absorbing larger communities with the potential to absorb most major metropolitan areas. That is terrifying to think about, especially when the buildings themselves are going to keep you there FOREVER.
Additionally, the Foundation using hurricanes as a source of cover to eradicate infestations is pretty clever, and the concept of them firebombing mobile home parks is an entertaining notion.
If I had one complaint, it would be the omission of the buildings feeding on residents from a previous version of this article, because that was some terrifying imagery. However, I do think the current version is more polished overall.
+1. Nifty Skip.
I'm… conflicted, on this one.
On the one hand, it's very strange, it's well-written, and I like the origin, and the advancement is neat. There is an odd moment where you jump from "the interior is squishy and the furniture is unconvincing" straight to "once it is inhabited", and I'm not really sure how that gap is bridged. Like, people move into the squishy house voluntarily?
On the other side… there are a lot of details in the article that come off as a pretty shitty commentary about poor people. I don't think this was your intent at all, and I don't think it stands out as a through line since they were always interspersed with other descriptions, but they still happened often enough to be very uncomfortable. Examples:
- The items being destroyed by tornadoes and hurricanes used as a method of dispersion (in retrospect, they're probably inhabited when this occurs)
- People refusing to leave the objects due to (fictional) opiate addiction
- People in these communities becoming highly insular and growing their own food
- People in these communities stealing from neighboring communities
- These commodities destroying existing structures and producing strip malls, motels, and other urban sprawl
So, I don't think that it was your intention to consciously invoke stereotypes about poverty. I fully believe you just set out to write a weird creepy skip. Unfortunately, it comes off as a skip that could take credit for real-world behaviour, but defines that behaviour is a really negative way.
Edit: It really doesn't help that this is a compulsion effect. It reads like, "Oh, it's a trailer park mimic with <rather cool effects and origin.> Also, if you move in, you will inevitably become a drug-addicted criminal who will never let anyone escape that lifestyle and will be indirectly responsible for destroying surrounding communities. And you'll probably die in a tornado." Like… is that a necessary storyline?
I've tried to do some clarifying and content-adjusting edits to address your concerns and critiques.
Whether you like it or not, history is on our side. We will bury you!
…I'm pretty sure that jump scare isn't supposed to be there.
What are you talking about?
pastarasta1 is quick-talking and often scheming
I wasn't going to leave a comment, but I do have some thoughts, so I may as well. I agree that there is a sense of relying on poverty stereotypes, which I'm 95% sure wasn't intentional, and I think the idea would have worked much better if it had been framed as a suburban housing ghost town instead. Something that just appears and gradually encroaches on actual towns and cities, with a vaguer relationship to any potential inhabitants.
It is a very fun idea, overall. One thing I particularly like is the mention that the fungus mimics stuff besides housing structures, including crude humanoid shapes. I'm not ascribing any intelligence or purpose for the fungus, so I imagine its attempts at mimicking people were…bad.
I kept waiting for something bad to happen to the human residents (like it lulls and consumes them), but I'm glad it was left uncertain (to me) exactly what SCP-2379 gets out of this relationship with the people it attracts. It's creepy this way! They defend the SCP, too! I'd love to read a log of someone forcefully removed from an instance, maybe they're completely unaware that they've been leading a different life than usual, but their dialogue is peppered with really bizarre things that sound insane or totally alien from our perspective.
The WikiWalk team is proposing edits to this page. All proposed edits will be in a collapsible below this post, and after 7 days if there are no serious objections to the edits, the feedback received will be taken into account as the edits are made. If you have questions not directly related to the article about this project, please pm a member of the WikiWalk Team.
A crosslink is being proposed to link SCP-2379 to the Prometheus Labs hub page, as the article in question references the GoI, and the Prometheus Labs hub page links back to the article.
Editing this:
Development of SCP-2379 began in 1982, as a project by an independent group of mycologists in collaboration with Prometheus Labs, in order to create sustainable self-perpetuating housing out of fungus.
To this:
Development of SCP-2379 began in 1982, as a project by an independent group of mycologists in collaboration with Prometheus Labs, in order to create sustainable self-perpetuating housing out of fungus.
A few other possible crosslinks:
SCP-995 is a fungus that mimics furniture that might be researched for similarity.
SCP-2804 and SCP-1627 are both located in the American southeast and could present a major threat if 2379 crosses their path. (2804 is the stronger link, since it creates indestructible building additions and the Foundation are already tearing down structures in its path.)
Posting here to note that I have made the edit proposed above, as I am unable to edit the original comment.
can I get some nice "no signatures on my forum"
sigma-9 css machine broke
understandable have a nice day
Prometheus Labs is the Dexter's laboratory of the wiki (Amazingly intelligent but also surprisingly stupid and shortsighted) and I don't like that at all. Every skip they are involved with ends up sounding like a cartoon plot, but instead of fully embracing the goofiness, everyone goes for gravitas and the end result seems like a not self aware "serious stuff" movie where they want you to cry or gasp but you can only laugh at the pathos. I would highly appreciate if you dropped the whole Prometheus Labs thing entirely (it also doesn't add anything to the skip and ends up being just a throwaway paragraph).
Moving past that, the skip is really interesting and original. Upvoted
(account deleted)
