Bal-chatri / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page Bal-chatri.

How about those tales though...

Jacob Conwell 23 Jul 2016 16:37

And yet another Anderson Robotics tale series comes to a close, this time with severe damage done to both sides. For those of you wondering about the title:

Bal-Chatri: Bal-chatri are traps designed to catch birds of prey (raptors).

Fitting considering the naming scheme for Anderson’s product lines.

Special thanks to TwistedGears, Randomini, Taffeta, GreenWolf, Roget, A Random Day, and djkaktus for their thorough feedback. If I showed this to you and missed your credit here, let me know.

Extra special thanks to TwistedGears for letting me use his character, Agent Navarro, and for being so cool with what I do with his agent/anartist/wizard/AA.

Double Secret Thanks to Kalinin for providing the inspiration for this entire series of tales.

Highly recommend you check out the earlier tales in the series before you read this: Ties That Bind, Realignment, and Consolidation. Additionally, check out GreenWolf’s story The Analog Kid for details on who Myra Rider is, and how she fits in to this tale, and more info on Three Portlands.

With all that said, time for me to put Anderson on the shelf for a while. Feel free to jump off with your own tale/skip where this story ends.

Last edited on 30 Aug 2017 00:51 by Jacob Conwell Show more

GreenWolf 23 Jul 2016 20:55

An excellent and thoroughly enjoyable read, as usual. I'm a bit sad to hear that this is the last we'll be seeing of Anderson from you for a while, but a wizard battle is always a pretty good way to wrap a series up.

+1, eagerly looking forward to your next work.

Edit: This song is surprisingly fitting for this tale, and Anderson Robotics in general.

Last edited on 24 Jul 2016 06:13 by GreenWolf Show more

Jacob Conwell 23 Jul 2016 23:39

Don't get me wrong. Writing this series has been a blast, but for at least a little bit it will be time to work on stories other than Anderson's.

Taffeta 24 Jul 2016 00:24

Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto, for leaving us with this glorious robot wizard battle. +1

Jacob Conwell 24 Jul 2016 19:36

That scene in particular was some of the most fun I've had writing in a while. Glad you liked it.

Agent MacLeod 24 Jul 2016 00:26

Seriously, when is he dying? I need to know already.

Jacob Conwell 24 Jul 2016 01:32

That's a very good question.

(account deleted) 06 Dec 2020 13:02

Some day "I can fix this" will be uttered by a character undergoing a crisis, and they will be able to fix whatever this is. Today is not that day.

Very well done, overall. Compelling action, good call-backs, oodles of character development, and some interesting turns that, while not out of left field, still feel surprising. With halfway left for the rest of this cycle, I am very, very interested to see where it goes, in a way that I haven't been for a series in some time.

My one complaint is that the description of various characters is so distinctive that it's very obvious when you are cribbing from previous works, sometimes word for word (Medea has "shoulder-length brunette hair and faint blue eyes"; Jason has "mop of curly blond hair; Jeffery is "a middle-aged man with dark skin"; Anderson has "triangular grating that rapidly hissed with the passage of air" and "two small camera lenses that glowed with a faint green light"). They aren't bad descriptions, but it was a shame to be jerked out of the narrative several times by the realization that "hey, wait, didn't Conwell already say this?"

Still, an easy +1

DarkStuff 15 Dec 2020 01:43

Navarro mumbled, violently shaking as he was helped to his feet a wink, the two agents watching as the worn down husk that was Vincent Anderson stumbled onto the stage.

I can not for the life of me figure out what "a wink" is doing in this sentence.

“But the company still exists. Phineas has probably taken over by now. Lop off one head and have another two grow back in its place.”

Oh god I am a sucker for thematic call-backs, and this is especially potent given that Phineas was the one who said that line. Absolutely perfect.

And oh-ho-ho damn, this was a banger of a series ender. Anderson may have "escaped" (not really), but the dynamic is quite different now, isn't it? I wonder how long he can keep control of the company before the rest of everyone decides its time he be overthrown. I mean, he can't just stay top-dog while at all times being at risk of dying or otherwise losing connection to his Saker… right? Intriguing as hell.

+1

Ralliston 14 Mar 2022 19:28

First of all — the title is ridiculously clever and sounds cool as fuck. Free bonus points for that.

As for the actual tale itself — AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I LOVE THIS

Seriously. Seeing Anderson go all-out wizard on Navarro (both of whom I absolutely adore) and them dueling was among the most satisfying moments I've had reading this site. And the end reveal — the end reveal! Oh man. Bloody brilliant.