SCP-7837 / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page SCP-7837.

Ruskied 12 Sep 2022 23:11

This is pretty creative and original. The atmosphere of this was really nice. + 1

Minor compliance however is the overuse of redactions on the dates. It seems most of them are redacted when I don't think they need to be. I'd say the redactions for the experiments don't really do much and such unnecessary redactions is not looked well upon in modern SCP

Although, I must ask, where did you find the image used in the article? Don’t want it to be removed for breaking the copyright

Last edited on 12 Sep 2022 23:28 by Ruskied Show more

Jayenne 13 Sep 2022 00:01

I just fixed the citations for the image. Thanks for the reminder!

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SCP Author Page:
https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-author-page-of-jayenne-mother-of-monsters

Mr Carbon 13 Sep 2022 00:22

Dear new authors: this is what happens when you swallow your pride and listen to crit (mostly not my crit I hasten to add - fabledtiefling does not match any existing user name did most of the heavy lifting on this one)! Nice work.

_{btw it’s Task Force rather than Taskforce}

Last edited on 13 Sep 2022 00:23 by Mr Carbon Show more

alexpine 13 Sep 2022 00:25

Or you could be like me and listen to crit and then post a tale that just barely doesn't bomb haha. I'm working on an SCP though

OriTiefling 13 Sep 2022 01:43

:icedab:

This was one of the best authors I have worked with. They were incredibly receptive to feedback and adjustments, and as a result I think this article really came together in the end. Well done!

LORDXVNV 13 Sep 2022 01:48

Pretty good. Big fan of anomalous ecosystem things.

Personal things I wasn't the biggest fan of:
I felt the piece got a tad long winded in the middle, but ultimately there was a clear enough escalation for it to be satisfying towards the end.
The ending speech of kulehadra was too human both in diction and motive for my taste as opposed to being something truly alien or a communication cobbled together from stolen human thoughts. I would have preferred to see something like more translation ambiguity and hungers.

Overall though it's an interesting work.

Jayenne 13 Sep 2022 02:06

The idea was that 7837-X1 had consumed enough humans and gained enough of their memories to reach a higher state of mental functionality compared to the previous instances. X1 still has not achieved "transcendence" (human-level or superior intelligence) yet, but is very close. That is also why X1 has moved beyond a basic satellite disguise and adopted a more customized frame.

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SCP Author Page:
https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-author-page-of-jayenne-mother-of-monsters

LORDXVNV 13 Sep 2022 02:11

Fair enough, though my issue is still that it feels human instead of unique — what I mean by that is the artistic choices here support the implicit assumption that the human mode of thinking is the highest form of thinking (and I don't mean in terms of intelligence but the fundamental ways humans see the world, how they experience time, space, and kinship, etc) instead of a utterly alien intelligence that maps these words onto concepts that are just different enough to feel wrong to hear.

Still, good job! Like I said before, this is a personal preference and it's one line out of many.

Jayenne 13 Sep 2022 02:13

I see what you're getting at and I kind of agree, but I'm not galaxy-brained enough to write a form of intelligence higher than my own.

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SCP Author Page:
https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-author-page-of-jayenne-mother-of-monsters

Djlolotis 13 Sep 2022 09:48

I will always like those ''anomalous creatures sharing a habitat'' articles, especially with a creative approach to it, +1

+1

Watermelanie 13 Sep 2022 11:19

SCP-7837 is a population of anomalous machines resembling manmade satellites that exhibit animalistic and predatory behavior.

Hmm, man-eating satellites.

Massive size (approximately 30.48 meters long).

possessing the highest recorded top speed of any 7837 instance (930kmh)

…Giant man-eating satellites moving near the speed of sound. Oh man.

but the text is always heavily warped as if melted or sanded away.

This leads me to think that it's not manmade. Have you ever seen image generation algorithms' attempts to make text?

Overall, I really liked this article. The concept of man-eating satellites is pretty interesting and is executed really well, and for someone who reads mostly through visualization, the last Attack Transcript was really well done.

Big +1 on this.

+1

cdithink 18 Sep 2022 16:45

this is really original and also freaky as hell. delicious

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— CD

Re: +1

Jayenne 18 Sep 2022 19:41

My favorite part to write was the guys getting crushed by X1 absorbing the van.

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SCP Author Page:
https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/the-author-page-of-jayenne-mother-of-monsters

Magnus Artifex 08 Jun 2023 06:39

Transformers but they aren’t intelligent. Awesome. Grammar could use some work but I like it a ton!