Hmmm. I like the concept that you have playing here, but I have a couple complaints. First, this is essentially a universal constant of a concept and… It sort of only feels as though it affects a single. Now, I understand that this is because we only see it from the perspectvie of Dillon, but we also get the universal log and it feels like there's something more here so like… How come only Dillon is aware of this? Wouldn't every person ever that dies be aware that this is happening? I suppose with an infinite number of universe, each universe has only one person constantly being reborn, but just thinking about the ramifications make me feel as though the idea of the anomaly could have been explored much better.
Second, I think this article suffers a lot from 'tell, instead of showing'. There's a lot of exposition and like, I sort of get the idea of what's going on, but the main character doesn't feel consistent, going from happy to miserable fairly quick. I think skipping long periods of time made him inconsistent.
Finally, the last note's… Really unnecessary? You introduce the Serpent and the Library to wrap things up with a concept the reader's already aware of and just… Yeah, that's it. There really isn't any depth other than 'ending the piece on a narrative punchline' and I don't think it pays off.
Overall… It's a -1, sorry. I think the concept is brilliant, but it needs a better execution of the idea.
