the game's effect, an anomalous entanglement between the user and the protagonist they control (the user experiences their avatar's emotions and physical state);
This is simply not true. Throughout the entire article, we were presented with how Buck and her avatar felt completely different things to every situation. In fact, you remind us constantly that she's not enjoying what she's going through, yet she's forced to by the game. The only time she feels what her avatar feels is at the end of the article when she starts feeling its pain (and sometimes in the middle of the article where she felt hot or whatever).
Between 2004 and 2021, fourteen D-class personnel were requisitioned as test subjects against the protests of Memetics and Countermemetics Section Chair Dr. Lillian Lillihammer; Site-43 maintains no D-class pool of its own. Testing was terminated entirely after Incident 5974-14.
So Lillihammer was against this and yet she still did it? Even if she was forced to, why accompany the latest subject with such venomous sarcasm at her own expense whenever she genuinely felt distressed or confused about things that happened? And why would the Foundation test so many people against a chief researcher's wishes? What would they gain from this? And does that mean Lillihammer, as a chief researcher, doesn't hold any power in the decisions made in the site regarding the anomalies she studies?
Also, in SCP-5281-D it's very hard to progress with decommissioning the anomaly because of the ethics committee, so what does this mean here? Do only anomalies matter? Why are class-d human lives so easily thrown out in favor of testing? The game is clearly dangerous if it's able to kill its users.
This claim was rejected, and the rarely-used demotion to D-class clause was invoked in recognition of her crimes against the Foundation. After amnesticization, she was assigned to SCP-682 as D-25748.
Crimes against the Foundation? Is the Foundation some kind of ruling state now, and not a private company? This makes absolutely no sense at all realistically. Besides, later the Foundation says they want these tests to continue to learn more about what happened at Site-19… after erasing Buck's memories of everything? Why didn't they just interrogate her?
»ask about FCE
The word "FCE" isn't in my vocabulary.
»ask about FEC
Haha, funny joke? This brings absolutely nothing to the article at all. You might think this is a nitpick, but when you propose such an important subject to the reader, that being sexism in the workplace and dictatorship as well as cult fanaticism and the mindwashing that that does to people, I really don't believe you should take it lightly.
»fight bowe
There's no fighting what he does to you.
This. This needs to be highlighted. This, and several other times in this scene, it is implied she's raped. Even if her avatar is willing, her as a player is obviously disgusted and wants to escape and wants to say no but she is forced to go through that horrible experience, and we were as well as readers with absolutely no prior warning. This entire scene was disgusting, and I couldn't wait until it was done. This, though, does not mean it was executed well or that you managed to wring out feelings of disgust from readers in a good way. Anyone with a sane mind would feel disgusted by implied rape and someone being forced to do that against their will.
This also brings us back to the SCP making the player feel what the avatar feels - this did not happen here. Also, what was your point with this? Criticise rape, that everyone knows is bad? Criticise sexism by overexposing readers to how the victims feel, when one of the readers could be a victim themselves and react adversely to this? Are you in any way able to speak for the victims in this or were you trying to act as a white knight and defend them with how you envision these things to go? This whole scene honestly sickened me and what makes it worse to me is that this means nothing at all in the grand scheme of things. This, as confirmed later down the article, is not truly what happened - she never felt this. This was a psychological torture implied by the SCP to wring out a confession from the player? There were other ways you could've done this.
D-25748: That's not true.
Dr. Lillihammer: No?
D-25748: No. None of this is true. This isn't what happened. Can I see my personnel file?
Dr. Lillihammer: Sure, I'll go get it.
D-25748: Really?
Dr. Lillihammer: No! Of course you can't see your personnel file.
Why is Lillihammer joking at a time like this? There's a human being by her side clearly going through a traumatic event and she makes jokes of it? This isn't even the first time, I was personally disgusted at her after the scene where several people are murdered and her only comment is:
It is very dark. You are likely to be eaten by SCP-017.
»
Dr. Lillihammer: Okay, that was a nice touch.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but Lillihammer was never the cold, antisocial type that would make jokes during moments of extreme stress and trauma. If that's a coping mechanism she makes for herself, that's understandable, but the Foundation would never allow someone so irresponsible and inhuman to accompany other humans in tests where their lives and sanity are at risk. I know Wettle is sent out to interview people (and does a terrible job at that), but I also do not agree with the way he acts. This, though, is especially bad and really made me feel sick.
OPERATIONS CONTROL
You are standing in the beating heart of Site-19, and your heart is beating in tune with Bowe's. Technicians bustle around you, working at stolen terminals on nefarious purposes, while guards with red arm-bands observe them with well-trained suspicion.
So, I gathered you were also trying to criticise dictatorship and cult fanaticism throughout your article. The dictatorship stuff is extremely shallow, only uses very common tropes and doesn't go anywhere deeper than "dictators are bad", which everyone knows.
»asdfghjkl
Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
The "gameplay" is absolutely terrible. What is the point of an interactive story if you can't interract with it? Is this game just trying to make a point? if so, why make it a game at all? Why not a movie? The whole point of making games is so that the player can make choices - but all of Buck's choices are ignored. If you just wanted to show how she didn't want to do those things, you could easily make it a movie and have her comment she doesn't want to do those things.
Bowe's actions and personality
I haven't read the canon, but if a character is solid and realistic enough, I wouldn't need to. Either that, or you weren't able to represent him well enough in this article. Either way, I have several complaints about his actions and personality.
Bowe isn't a good villain. Bowe is a rebellious teenager that didn't get what he wanted and so he will throw a tantrum. He has made himself a general, several people tell him how he should lead their group so as to try and win the war and he just doesn't want to do it their way? What does he get by directly going against logical steps? He literally is just evil and stupid because he can be. That's not how a dictator acts, that's not how anyone in the world acts. Dictators aren't stupid people that got power and now act like kids, they're smart and charismatic people that really do trick others into doing what they want, but they don't throw away their chances of victory in favor of killing more people or being evil - this isn't a saturday morning cartoon, this is the real world. (And even if you say this is a fictional article, this has a serious theme that is constantly downplayed by inappropriate humor, so it still should be treated with respect and seriousness.)
His personality could be summed up to: chaotic evil. He is evil because he can be, and so he is. Who cares if that'll cost him his victory? He's just evil! I get him manipulating others for his cause, but constantly sabotaging himself doesn't make any sense at all and it only left me with a very barebones and shallow silhouette of a character.
VKTM
Why is this a VKTM article? This has literally nothing to do with VKTM, especially with how it has been portrayed as of late. VKTM has "shock value", yes, but it was always just nonsensical gore without purpose that was just weird. Lately, it has even gathered a few characters that represent it and have their own personalities and motives and seem to be trying to bring the greater good to people in unconventional and wrong ways. Still, this is very extreme, and unlike anything else they have ever made. I know they've had psychological torture before, but nothing to this level. There was also no extreme gore, just extreme realism. Real violence and real murders, not something too out of this world to be believable.
And the biggest point of all: everyone always forgets what they watched with VKTM, and this has been consistent with all but ONE of VKTM's articles, so why are they breaking this trend here and why specifically to this ex-doctor?
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