SCP-6715 / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page SCP-6715.

page 1 of 212next »

Author Post

Nitro147 26 May 2021 05:13

Let’s go! My second SCP and the first contest I’ve participated in. I don’t imagine this will come anywhere close to winning, the competition is pretty insane already, but I had fun writing this and I’m glad I got to participate in a wider site event.

I realize the connection to nature is a little stretched here. Though it takes place in a national park, and has some nature based imagery, it is more focused on human nature.

Alternate choices to the 6000 slot:
6999
6001
6006
6600
6715

Image Source

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Radio_Control_Tower_Denali_Park.jpg

Critters

Didn’t get much crit for this one, though I know I’m missing someone from chat who provided some help really early on. If that’s you DM me and I will add your name here.

If you have any questions about it let me know. I'd be happy to discuss it and offer up details I may have intentionally left out.

Facilier 27 May 2021 04:20

+1, I felt the characters and their beliefs and/or motives were pretty well-written which seems hard to pull off when you have to balance so many of them in one article. I felt intrigued at the start and hooked by the time I got to the recovered corrupted video log.

Nitro147 28 May 2021 02:44

Thanks for the +1!

Also I'm glad you could buy into the characters. Writing all of them in an interesting way was probably the most difficult part of this piece, so it's nice to know it worked out.

Limeyy 01 Jun 2021 00:31

This is a masterclass in escalation throughout a piece that makes it a very fun read. The characters felt real and the interactions in the exploration log and debriefs really pulled everything together. The twist was extraordinary and certainly not one I saw coming, but still felt earned after the Commander's debrief, which is an incredibly hard line to walk but one you have done very well. I felt that the diary and Prometheus format in the middle dragged on a little, but by and large this was a fantastic time, and the fact that it's sitting at +20 right now is criminal.

Nitro147 03 Jun 2021 02:15

Glad you enjoyed it and that the parts I spent the most time on were what stuck out to you.

Looking back I should have realized that I could cut down on the journal. When I was writing it I was just trying to reach a certain date and had to fill in the gaps with more entries.

Anyways, thank you for the +1 and especially for your comment.

(account deleted) 03 Jun 2021 01:53

WOW

I loved this article. I also noticed some things you might wanna fix, once editing opens back up.

Commander Ben Schaefer an operative of MTF Zeta-9 ("Mole Rats"). Chosen for their experience in traversing unmapped subterranean spaces.

You need a comma after 'Schaefer'

Commander Shaefer: Certainly looks like it. Hey Raynes, you picking up anything yet.

He's asking a question of Raynes, so question mark.

Commander Shaefer: It's got another one of those biometric scanners. Rivera, you think you can get this thing open.

Another question.

There may be some commas missing and in places where they shouldn't be, but I didn't catch them all.

Anyways, +1

Nitro147 03 Jun 2021 02:09

Ah, thanks for pointing those out. With how long this is I'm sure I missed a few more things like that throughout the piece.

Also, edits are allowed for this contest, so I went ahead and fixed those up.

I'm also glad you enjoyed it!

(account deleted) 04 Jun 2021 02:25

Ah, I did not realize you could still edit. My apologies.

Also, thanks for reaching out, I completely forgot to +1!

Maggywaggy 07 Jun 2021 22:50

Hey..that's pretty good.

I like this one for 6001 personally. But the whole thing is just super good. I had no idea where you were going at the beginning of the article but by the end you had your hooks in me anyway. Great work. +1

Nitro147 08 Jun 2021 04:52

Thanks! Doubt I'll get the 6001 spot, but the fact that you think this piece is worthy of it is awesome in itself.

sachiel187 09 Jun 2021 09:42

i don't know if this just doesn't feel "X000" enough for other people or what, but this is an excellent work of escalation and character that had me HOOKED. +1, deserves a lot more notice than what it has now.

+1

totallynotenby 11 Jun 2021 23:54

holy shit that was good. yo fantastic job just astounding. I usually leave comments on what I like about the article and on any SPaG errors I find but its all so good I can't figure out what exactally to compliment.
_-temmy

ThunderBug 16 Jun 2021 06:41

I don't think its -000 worthy, but a great piece nonetheless.

+1

Docrev 18 Jun 2021 01:39

Just a minor thing, but AL is the abbreviation for Alabama. Alaska is AK.

Nitro147 18 Jun 2021 02:43

Should be fixed now. Thanks for letting me know!

Frozen heart

Maxyfran73 22 Jun 2021 04:33

Holy crap that was good. The characterization here was beautiful, and the way you led through the article was honestly amazing. When I began reading this piece I thought Alice would be a victim of this all (And in a way, she still is) but she wanting to help and the way she both influenced and is influenced by thoughts was really cool. And then the switcheroo. Just… Man, this article is def a favorite now.

An amazing story. Would def read a continuation if you ever think of writing one; got really invested on these characters throughout the piece. For now tho, upvoting the skip~

Re: Frozen heart

Nitro147 22 Jun 2021 04:55

I did leave the ending open intentionally. It'll probably be awhile before I come back to this story, but I do hope to follow up on it one day.

page 1 of 212next »