LaRue Post - Willie's shine / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page LaRue Post - Willie's shine.

Author Post

Vivarium 20 Nov 2020 22:01

Thank you MalyceGraves, and plaidypus for looking at my draft, and giving me a place to write about moonshine, and big ole gators.

+ Attribution

• All the La Rue stuff is done by MalyceGraves, and is licensed CC BY-SA 3.0
• Moonshine silhouette was made by me.

Last edited on 20 Nov 2020 22:34 by Vivarium Show more

MalyceGraves 20 Nov 2020 22:32

Wholesome. This is part of La Rue that doesn't get talked about as much.

Small stories that mean something.

+1

Cerastes 21 Nov 2020 00:20

Poor one-eyed one-armed willie. At least he didn't lose a leg…

cybersqyd 21 Nov 2020 08:25

I find myself reading this and just…wishing it did more with the concept? There's a meanness the opening implies about La Rue that feels somewhat out of character for them, even if Joe did step in and prevent it; but equally the actual narrative feels…cliche and like we're seeing the cliff notes of a more interesting story; where all the actually engaging events are boiled down to a short mention.

My feeling is that this is somewhat caused by the actual GoI Format here: it doesn't provide a lot of room to do fun 'battles with a gator' moments or really in-depth characterisation or anything; but stuff like La Rue Posts - Brain Stew shows that it can work when you have some really evocative imagery in there and this…doesn't really?

Vivarium 21 Nov 2020 08:59

While I do agree with the points you laid out, I do feel as if focusing the story on the fight with the gator would pull the article away from its intended message. This article is meant to be a small story that attempts to teach a simple lesson. Be kind to your neighbors, and any details that didn't help push that lesson would feel ( to me at least ) superfluous. Also, on your point about the meanness feeling out of place. As someone who has lived in a small town in the south, while people tend to be friendlier, there is always gonna be assholes wherever you go. Especially if its a swamp full of outcasts and misfits.

Last edited on 21 Nov 2020 20:47 by Vivarium Show more

do_the_right_thing 08 Feb 2021 17:33

There's enough personality here to carry a bite-sized story just about this buck-wild whiskey but the story here is a little too ambitious for the framework its set up in, as the prior comments noted. Sometimes, less is more.

---

Spoon!