SCP Idea Shrink Ray

Summary:

in short a shrink ray

SCP Idea Shrink Ray

Jtporach 13 Oct 2020 14:02

Seeking Greenlights:no.

Page Type:SCP Article

Genre (Optional):Action

Page Layout (Optional):Talk about how its contained and then describe it gives some test and incident and a proposal to use the item on large scps to transport
Elevator Pitch:SCP-XXXX is a shrink ray that when pointed at an object and fired the item will shrink. The item will remain shrunk for a certain ammount of time

Central Narrative:While SCP-XXXX is a highly useful it has to be used the right way or else your screwed

Hook/Attention-Grabber: The incident Report in which the site its contained at gets shrunked (Plan if the scp gets on the wiki doing a tale about that)
Additional Notes:The time which an object is shrunk is completely random

Last edited on 13 Oct 2020 14:07 by Jtporach Show more

Re: SCP Idea Shrink Ray

Dr Morongo 13 Oct 2020 14:04

to be honest, no.

Also this doesn't follow forum guidlines at all.

Read the sticky posts.

Re: SCP Idea Shrink Ray

Jtporach 13 Oct 2020 14:08

well this was akward as i just fix it

Forum Criticism Team - Junior Staff Post

OCuin 13 Oct 2020 14:15

Dr Morongo , as per the Criticism Policy, forum critique is required to be relatively in-depth.

to be honest, no.

Also this doesn't follow forum guidlines at all.

Read the sticky posts.

This does not constitute in-depth feedback and does not help the author improve their idea. When reviewing an idea, please try to consider what would be helpful to the author in terms of improving their idea. Members of the Criticism Team will prioritise posts with no replies, so posting with unhelpful feedback may prevent the author from getting input from experienced reviewers. In future, please consider this when posting feedback on the forum.

---

Jtporach , I recommend you reach out to the Butterfly Squad Roster for feedback.

Re: SCP Idea Shrink Ray

Dr Morongo 13 Oct 2020 15:23

This SCP is just boring, noone wants to read about a shrink ray, that's something you can find in every Sci-fi movie or series, poeple come to the SCP foundation for new and interesting concepts, while I may not know how to make those, I know that a shrink ray is diffently not it.

Poeple want an apple that transports them into another world, you're giving them an apple that tastes like an orange.

I think you should give a read to : http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/how-to-write-an-scp

http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/mackenzie-pitfalls#toc2

http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/yourjouney-part-1

Last edited on 13 Oct 2020 15:24 by Dr Morongo Show more

Forum Criticism Team - Captain Post

Zyn 14 Oct 2020 04:58

Dr Morongo , this feedback is vague and not particularly helpful.

poeple come to the SCP foundation for new and interesting concepts, while I may not know how to make those, I know that a shrink ray is diffently not it.

If you're unsure about how to write "new and interesting concepts", it's generally better to point the author in the direction of articles that serve as good examples of unique content, rather than just guides that cover the general basics.

Poeple want an apple that transports them into another world,

This isn't necessarily true—we already have a lot of portal-based SCP articles on the site. Assuming this is a metaphor of some sort, it doesn't really help the author understand what their next steps to take are.

you're giving them an apple that tastes like an orange.

This is a confusing statement since it doesn't really tell the author what they need to work on, nor does it seem to be particularly related to writing.

Please be more conscientious with your feedback moving forward.

Re: Forum Criticism Team - Captain Post

Mikaelious 14 Oct 2020 07:25

I think they took the "apple portal/apple that tastes like oranges" thing straight from a guide, namely this one. Which, yeah, as you said, doesn't really help out of context like this.

Last edited on 14 Oct 2020 07:26 by Mikaelious Show more

Forum Criticism Team - Junior Staff Post

OCuin 13 Oct 2020 14:05

Author, per the new required reading forum guidelines: http://www.scp-wiki.net/forum/t-13282684/required-reading:how-to-use-this-forum-ideas please fill out the new concept template to seek feedback on your idea:

**Seeking Greenlights:** Put yes or no.

**Page Type:** SCP Article, Tale, GoI Format, Joke SCP, Site Dossier, Other (specify)

**Genre (Optional):** Horror, Drama/Emotional, Comedy, Action, History, Other (specify)

**Page Layout (Optional):** [How will you will structure the page in terms of information presentation, or plot development? If you plan on using a unique format/format screw, describe that here.]

**Elevator Pitch:** [What is the basic core idea? Use a bullet point list if necessary.] 

**Central Narrative:** [Describe the story beats or overarching context/"big picture" for your piece. If there is no story content, put "none".] 

**Hook/Attention-Grabber:** [What is novel/unique about your premise? What is special about your idea here that will make it stand out among the other works already on the mainsite?] 

**Additional Notes:** [Note any concerns or particular areas of assistance you would like reviewers to focus on.]

Remember to please edit your previous post using the "edit" function under the "options" tab to the lower right of your first comment rather than creating a new thread.

Also, please mind the wordcount limit— the combined text for your answers to the last four sections (Elevator Pitch, Central Narrative, Hook/Attention-Grabber, and Additional Notes) MAY NOT exceed 400 words. For convenience, authors can use this page to check wordcount: https://wordcounter.net/

Once you have revised your post accordingly, please reach out to reviewers to request that they look at your thread. You can find a list of ways to contact reviewers in this thread: http://www.scp-wiki.net/forum/t-13282692/how-to-get-more-reviews