SCP-4542 specimen are contained communally within Insectoid Containment Chamber 7 at Site-71 Parazoology Division
Specimen should be plural (specimens), and I think that "Site-71 Parazoology Division" should probably be written as 'Site-71's Parazoology Division'.
You say, at the start of the description, that the SCP is the species. However, in the rest of the description the SCP is the insect. Either change the start of the description, or replace the offended sentences in the rest of the description with 'SCP-4542 instances' or something similar.
SCP-4542 eggs reach maturity within 24-hours
24 hours doesn't require hyphenation.
The average lifespan of SCP-4542 is 10 years, with the oldest recorded instance living 13 years before expiring from natural causes. SCP-4542's lifespan directly correlates with the average lifespan of the European rabbit and is theorized to be caused by the presence of the rabbit's DNA.
While yes, this is the average lifespan that a European rabbit can technically live to, rabbits are notoriously awful at living a long time. Most die before they reach a few years old, due to illness, injury or predators. As is, this is probably fine, but maybe it could be reworded to better reflect this?
citizens of Yorkshire were administered amnestics.
This is like, five million people. Just making sure you're aware of the scale of this operation.
All of our friends sided with her mother and now Bella is too
This sounds like he's talking about friends of himself and Bella's, when you mean himself and his ex-wife's (I think). I'd probably rephrase this a little.
The "Bug-Bunnies" laid eggs.
He's called them 'Bugs-Bunnies everywhere else. Was this typo intentional, or was it an oversight here?
I am assuming that the missing comma and apostrophe in the final note is intentional, as he is in a rush to get away.
The inspection of Mr. Larson's storage unit found an infestation numbering close to 80,000. 50 of these were captured with the remaining instances being terminated. All attempts to locate Mr. Larson have proven unsuccessful. An investigation into the origin of the technology purchased by Mr. Larson is currently ongoing.
Maybe experiment with this paragraph a little. Something about the only short sentences and lack of commas makes it feel, I don't know, too angry? The tone just feels a little weird and repetitive.
(account deleted)
