SCP-4547 / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page SCP-4547.

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SCP-4547: Exterminans

stormbreath 12 Sep 2019 14:07

Notes About this SCP:

• Let's get this out of the way: the taronyu look like githzerai. There are no CC-compliant images of a githzerai (and even if there were, they wouldn't be realistic to include), but I imagine that the taronyu look like githzerai from D&D. They're obviously non-human, but not so alien as to be completely foreign to humanity.
• All of the taronyu words (in Vi'na) are actually the Na'vi conlang from Avatar, so you can look all of them up for definitions, if you want. Additionally, if you want to write something with the taronyu, use Na'vi for their words.
• This SCP has been a long-time coming. It was originally planned to be a Straight on Till Morning SCP, and then many months after initially being abandoned brought back for Ad Astra Per Aspera. It's not terribly different from the original version — I didn't have much back then.
• Fetch.aic is the final product of Project: LUMINAL, from MaliceAF's excellent ghost story. The name is a reference to the folklore fetch, as there is both a living and an undead copy of the AI. It's the onboard AIC for the ship, and handles any tasks for them. (It's primarily for superluminal travel, but can do other stuff as needed.)
• The Martians mentioned in the Census report are an element of AAPA that will be established in a yet to be written SCP. They were brought back during a temporal based terraforming of Mars, that reverted it to a previous state.
• I helped remake the AAPA theme just so this could use it.

+ Pre-emptive Response re:Apollyon

So, this is an Apollyon. I have a feeling that people might get a little touchy about that, and want to address some clarifications as to why this is Apollyon:

For starters, from an in-universe perspective, this SCP fits just about every definition of Apollyon I've ever seen. It's worth noting that the SCP, in-universe, was written by taronyu in part. (How else would they know so much about what happened, in such good detail?) Any anthropocentric definition of Apollyon is therefore discarded.

1. Apollyon means uncontainable: There is no way to contain any of the sub-anomalies on this planet, other than just leaving them alone and running away. You can't put all the zombies back into a box, you can't fix the weather, you can't stop 3125. Furthermore, you can't conceal the anomaly, since the taronyu are public knowledge.
2. Apollyon means world-ender: This did end the world - several times over, in fact. It just didn't happen to Earth. In any case, a lot of the anomalies here could potentially end the world again, and do so rather easily too.
3. Apollyon means top-secret: I've seen at least one user voice the opinion that Apollyon represents stuff the Foundation keeps secret from itself, which is what they're doing here. They can't reveal their involvement in rescuing the taronyu, so this is secret.
4. Apollyon is the name of the Scarlet King: This is a bizarre definition I once saw on 2317 saying the class was specific to the Devourer, as it was it's name. Well, look at SCP-7777-B4-3, a Scarlet Heir. Boom.

Anyway, the out-of-universe reason for the Object Class is to sell the plot twist that comes in the second collapsible. Everything up to the point when the ITF discovers the living taronyu is meant to convey the idea that the taronyu are dead, and this is an utterly ruined world. I feel that Apollyon is crucial to selling that thought, much more than any other class would.

And finally, I just personally can't see it as anything else. Apollyon just fits it too well.

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can I get some nice "no signatures on my forum"
sigma-9 css machine broke
understandable have a nice day

Last edited on 11 Oct 2019 07:56 by stormbreath Show more

+128!

stormbreath 11 Oct 2019 07:58

This is a weird number to make a celebratory post for, but eh, didn't do anything for a more even number. It's really nice to see this doing well, it's done a lot better than I had really expected it would have!

If you're interested in reading more about the taronyu, I dropped a lore update to to the Ad Astra Per Aspera Hub yesterday with more info on the taronyu, Callisto and other things!

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can I get some nice "no signatures on my forum"
sigma-9 css machine broke
understandable have a nice day

rattles 12 Sep 2019 14:36

Phenomenal worldbuilding and lore usage. +1

More Power 12 Sep 2019 15:32

Combining the Ad Astra canon (which I find really interesting) with the Scarlet King?! Big +1 for me.

A Random Day 12 Sep 2019 16:14

I mostly enjoyed this, but the first exploration log didn’t do enough exploring of the world, completely lacked tension, and really only served as a vehicle to justify the second.

stormbreath 12 Sep 2019 16:31

This was a big concern of mine in the drafting phase, actually. None of my beta readers raised it as a problem, so I figured it was just me being too self-critical, but I 100% understand this criticism and it's good to see somebody else has it. I'll likely work on revising that log and seeing what I can do with it - the second exploration needs the set-up, but I don't really know what to do with the first log.

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can I get some nice "no signatures on my forum"
sigma-9 css machine broke
understandable have a nice day

A Random Day 12 Sep 2019 19:28

As far as I can tell, the first log isn't even the one in which the bunker coordinates are located. Your best bet is probably to add another log: change the first log to establish the dangers present on the planet and build tension, add a second log about locating Tihawnum bases, and keep the third about exploring the Tihawnum bunker.

Abhainn 12 Sep 2019 18:12

I find this part extremely fascinating -

Of note is that the Reypay 'Eveng are significantly more peaceful and less violent than the Children of the Scarlet King, and do not share in the same eschatological beliefs as the latter. The Reypay 'Eveng state that this is because "the world has already ended once: the Ruler's Spawn came into their kingdom and died on their throne."

The implication that "giving" the Earth to the Scarlet King's spawn and then murdering the crap out of them might be a way to end the threat of its devotees is kind of interesting. I know that's a pretty rough way of putting what happened on the other planet, but it's still just a great angle for me.

NatVoltaic 12 Sep 2019 20:18

Very glad to finally see this up on the wiki! Well worth the wait, I'd say.

+1

Swaghetti 13 Sep 2019 08:47

Awesome. +1

psychicprogrammer 13 Sep 2019 18:06

One thing I really loved was the conprocs double meaning, it states to both avoid going to it directly and to prevent humanity from going extinct if something like this happened on earth.

Sergeimosin 17 Sep 2019 18:17

I would love to see a dedicated sub canon develop out of this, depicting the challenges and triumphs of the taronyu as they integrate into a society that's almost utterly alien to them. Maybe even an exploration of the fragments of taronyu culture that survived the passage to earth

Last edited on 17 Sep 2019 18:18 by Sergeimosin Show more

catalinacobalt 18 Sep 2019 03:06

This is phenomenal, and the twist subverted the usual Apollyon expectations of grimdark nicely. Well done! +1

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