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"Now, Grakkus there is none too quick on his feet. It's probably because he leads such a… sedimentary life. "
- Zyzyx, Sacrifice
Third time's the charm, I guess.
Thanks to everyone that looked at this. I appreciate it.
The SCP is a little dry and it doesn't interest me or catch my attention.
You know, you could just sum it up to "it's boring." Aismallard already stated as much.
You don't even have to respond if all you're just going to downvote and say that it doesn't interest you without providing anything of value or any criticism that would entail the betterment of my writing.
It would've been fine the first time, but by the second, third, or fourth times, it gets on my nerves.
You don't even have to respond if all you're just going to downvote and say that it doesn't interest you without providing anything of value or any criticism that would entail the betterment of my writing.
macwarren does not match any existing user name, please note that after a piece has been mainlisted, readers are not obligated to post any sort of feedback, so getting angry over someone not providing advice in a mainlist comment on how to improve your writing doesn't reflect well on you as a writer.
If you would like to ask someone to elaborate on their response so you can edit the piece accordingly, you can (and should) make that request without sounding accusatory.
Possible relation to those gem insects SCP-507 found?
I get 3789 but why 409? They're both animate self-replicating crystals, but I don't get it beyond that. Especially if those bugs were apparently not similar enough.
It checks all the boxes of proper tone, escalation, etc., but it fails to interest me in any way.
Neutralvote.
Ehhhhhhhhh….?
Started off okay, but then too many levels of "And this happened, then this happened, then this happened" piled up too quickly near the end, and I really couldn't mesh all the disparate situations together into a cohesive story/scenario.
I did like the story about the initial discovery, that was well-integrated.
It's a nice level of "unexplained weird", I like it. I do have 2 logical concerns:
1. Some parts of Earth's interior are liquid (I'd always thought the mantle was, but apparently it's not!), so I'm a bit confused about the root system going all the way to the core but only manifesting in this area of Texas. Feels like, if it's an invasive anomaly, it would have spread further via the outer core at least.
2. The ending is interesting and hints at deeper mysteries, but I feel like there would be additional containment procedures after SCP-4271-B's discovery. You hint that changes are in process but should probably include at least something in the containment procedures, because Site management would want people to be aware of the issue at least. Could be an addendum maybe?
The article could also use some tightening-up on the writing side, as well as some edits for inconsequential info: see an example below.
Originally presumed to house gold within its cavities, the prospectors attempted to mine for the gold using their pickaxes but spent hours trying with no results and broken tools. The prospectors then tried to use their stacks of dynamite to break open the cliff face.
This passage is too narrative for something that's largely insignificant. Phrases like "spent hours trying with no results and broken tools" and "tried to use their stacks of dynamite" aren't clinical or efficient wording. I think this whole section could be one sentence.
1. It is an invasive organism. Texas is the point of origin and it spreads faster on the crust. It's roots take a little longer.
2. I didn't put anything else for - B because the Foundation doesn't know a lot about this thing. Their only encounter with it was when it tried to climb its way out of a crack in the ground only to fall all the way back down.
This reads like a rambling disorganized plot-hole-ridden Series 1 article, and I'm surprised enough people upvoted it to give it a positive rating.
The concept is… okay, not great, and the execution is very subpar.
Thopter, behavior like this in the forums or anywhere in the SCP Community is blatantly unacceptable, and a flagrant violation of Rule Zero ("Don't Be a Dick"). Regardless of whether your intent was to provide feedback, in accordance with the Criticism Policy, dickish language such as this directly goes against what is considered valid critique on the site. Do not do this again.
This is a closed staff post. Do not respond for any reason unless you are staff.
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This piece just doesn't work. It feels disjointed and boring. You don't break new ground, and I feel that even if you explained all the stuff you just casually mention, it would still not be really interesting. I'm sorry
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