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http://scpsandbox2.wikidot.com/jackuelar
Truly sorry if you see any piss-poor grammar or awkward wording I'm not use to writing in the English language and its really hard for me to concentrate for long periods of time.
I'm fairly certain that fungal infections and fungus are two different things. Someone who has more knowledge on botanist stuff please correct me if I'm wrong.
Botany is the study of plants, not funghi.
~🌸~Flower Power~🌸~
Strictly speaking, this is true — mycology is the study of fungi — but historically, mycology has been lumped into botany so often that they're pretty closely allied. FWIW.
That said, jackuelar, fungal infections and fungi are different things in the same way that bacterial infections and bacteria are different things. A fungal infection is what happens when a fungus colonizes the body of another organism, detrimentally. There are various species of pathogenic fungus; some are obligate pathogens (can't survive outside a host), while others are just opportunists. They are all, regardless, still fungi.
Fungus can also grow on living things in ways that aren't infections: fungal symbioses are a thing, as are epiphytic fungi, which grow on the surface of other organisms without helping or harming them.
I'm not even sure whether this is still helpful, but somebody said "botany", so I was summoned. ;)
— edit —
OK, I read the (first) draft. Sorry, jackuelar, but this is a big pile of biology fail. For one thing, many, many fungi are quite capable of infecting the human body: see here for more detail and here for some examples. For another, the phrase "grows via infecting the human body and altering the human bio-chemistry to that of a fungus" is so vague as to be nearly meaningless, except for the bit where altering human biochemistry towards that of an organism in a completely different kingdom would be quite rapidly and boringly lethal.
If you're going to write SCPs involving any particular topic, you really need to do your homework on that topic. That means quite a bit of research, and/or collaborating with an expert. Otherwise, you end up with factual problems that squish suspension-of-disbelief under a two-ton anvil.
Okay if you believe that you can edit out the science-fail in the draft than be my guess but don't change anything other than that please.
Also do you mind giving me feedback on the other drafts?
The only people who should be editing your sandbox when it comes to writing an SCP is you. Don't tell others to edit out stuff in your sandbox for you; you need to do it. It's your work after all. Getting help is good, but you can't rely on others to do the writing/editing solely for you.
Fixing the science fail would entail completely rewriting the skip, right down to the concept. I'm not going to write your skip for you. Unfortunately, I don't have time for more feedback at the moment, but I'll come back to this if I can.
Writing an SCP is hard, and the community won't write yours for you. Despite what the URL says, we're not really a wiki. You have to put forward a lot of effort on your own. Tell us more of where you want to take this, and we can provide more help.
Well like the draft title says its a work-in-progress I plan on adding some exploration logs that reveals that the source of the fungus is actually the third brother of the broken god and the god of flesh.
Sooo do you think that will make it more interesting?
That is very interesting, but very ambitious. My only immediate qualm is that I don't think a lot of people think of the Flesh/Ion and MEKHANE as siblings. More than that, fungus seems like something up Ion's alley, as opposed to its own thing. My advice would be to actually write the whole thing out, then ask for help, because you seem to have your mind made up.
I really don't think that'd go too well with the community. The Brokem God and his followers have years' worth of material, 610 a very ambitious article plus a relatively recent development in terms of added lore by a bunch of people. And while they have antagonized, they each have their very distinct flavor.
Trying to do the "new thing" in a pattern too similar to what's been done before will lead immediately to comparisons in which your skips may not look as well unless they're very distinctive.
Okay I've altered the description of the first draft and also added another draft
Okay I've just downloaded a fuck-ton of images from the visual records site and just made them into some more drafts keep this in mind all of my drafts are WIPs so if you wanna know what the idea is for a draft just ask and i'll tell you.
Jack, putting up a bunch of short ideas with some images is not precisely the best way to develop any of them, but that's your choice. However, announcing that fact to us is not particularly going to help either. Not only does it feel like borderline spamming (I am not staff, so don't quote me on that one), but it makes us lose interest so when you come up with a really good idea we may end up overlooking it (the critique variant of "the boy who cried wolf").
I honestly cannot tell you much from what you've put up since all of them are so vaguely presented. There's a couple where I may say "this could be interesting if made in this or that way" (cloth town and bagboy, for the record), but you're giving us so little to work here that we cannot give you a good review. Think of it this way: if a real state agent showed you a bunch of houses from 400 feet away, could you make any significant choice?
Okay i'll develop the drafts more and then show them will that make it any better?
If you're continuing a conversation, you can click the "reply" link at the lower right of the comment you're responding to. Helps so people are sure of who you're talking to. If you make a new comment, forum-goers assume you're talking to everyone reading the thread, not necessarily in reply to someone.
Um I'm not trying to continue a conversation what made you think that?
You double-posted, so I thought the first post was supposed to be a response to someone in the thread.
Ah now I can understand the confusion also do you mind giving feedback on my drafts?
It's a bit strange of you to ask here since you already posted the link below, but I happen to have the time.
House People
- This is too vague. Do the people just automatically become houses? Do they grow into houses? Do their body parts painfully change into wood and brick?
- Why is it Euclid?
- How did the Foundation find out about this phenomenon, and how did they prevent the public from freaking out?
Living Trenches
- Trenches are the deepest part of the ocean floor. How would anyone notice if they became sapient?
- That picture is most likely not an oceanic trench.
- Why is Dr. vladnik sent instead of someone who was already trained in Morse code? Also, capitalization errors.
- Why Morse code? Seems unusually convenient that the trench knows English and not something like Icelandic.
- What is "the human language"? There's no universal human language. Unless you're counting some grunts and facial expressions, but that's not language.
- The whole "can you call me this silly name" bit has been seen in older SCPs. The interview is pretty boring as a result and doesn't really reveal anything interesting about the SCP.
Outside in the Inside
- I don't even know what it is. Apparently it's some phenomena, but the picture just looks like the inside of an abandoned building.
Bin-bag
- How does anyone know it's a humanoid, if it's always in a bag? It'd effectively not be humanoid, since it's not human-shaped, it's bag-shaped.
- What does this thing do? Why should I read about it or care?
Dark Religion
- A meme is not a virus in the biological sense.
- I'm not sure an entire religion can be a meme. Religions tend to be rather intricate, unless it comes down to one tenet or something, in which case the tenet would be the meme and not the religion itself.
- What is the religion anyway? You don't say anything about it.
- Before you try to write anything with memetics, read this guide: http://www.scp-wiki.net/understanding-memetics
Cloth Town
- Everything seems kind of random. Why dolls? Why spiders?
- While the idea of spiders weaving cloth is interesting, cloth weaving is fundamentally different from silkspinning. For cloth, threads need to crisscross to form a coherent fabric. Spiderwebs are single lines of silk spun in a pattern that holds because of stickiness, not the weave.
Humanoid Vegetables
- Why is it called this if it's a species of earthworm?
- Why would it be a species of earthworm if it's got actual limbs?
House brothers
- Same thing as the first "draft", really.
The issue is frankly, none of these are long enough to give decent feedback on. The only thing I can say is "write more and maybe I'll have a better idea of whether I like it or not".
Think of it this way: let's say you're going to make soup. You have some chicken, vegetables, herbs, whatever. You show someone these things and ask them how the soup will taste. They have no idea, because they don't know what you're going to do with those things. How many are you going to add? How will you mix them? How will they be cooked in the soup? Right now, this is the issue with all your drafts.
There's not enough information to tell if it will work or not. You can't rely on the pictures to make the reader interested if you have no other substance—if this is all you've got, you're asking too much from the reader. You're the author; you need to tell the story.
Okay I will fully admit that the main reason for my drafts not making sense is because one I'm a lazy bastard and secondly I have to deal with a lot of stressful IRL stuff so I don't have a lot of time to develop my drafts.
How about whenever I make a draft that's a WIP I'll make a note explaining the main idea so people will know how to critique my drafts.
Do you think that will make it easier for people to critique my stuff?
So, your drafts don't make sense because you can't be bothered to do anything but half-ass them. And you want us, and me specifically, to waste time seriously reviewing something that you couldn't be bothered to put effort into.
No. Fuck that. There's dozens of other users who patiently wait for review on drafts that they've worked hard on and put actual effort into. If you don't have the time or inclination to come correct when it comes to writing, don't come at all.
No. No one wants to critique anything for a lazy person.
Deal with your stressful IRL stuff first, and write when you have the time to develop your ideas.
Everyone helping out is doing so on their own free time. Why should the reviewers pick up your slack, especially if you're aware that you're being lazy?
Listen, m8. I'm myself a lazy bastard and have a whole bunch of half-written drafts lying around in my "WIP" folder in my computer. You know why most people don't know this? Because I don't upload my extremely incomplete work and ask people for help on it, because it's too far from finished. I value my time as a reviewer and know other people do the same with theirs, so I only ask them to review stuff I know has had effort put into it.
Sure, occasionally we get ideas on which we are no sure if they are worth doing a full write-up: that happens. However, in those cases you should explicitly "do you think this idea is worth pursuing?". Last time I did so, I more or less outlined the entire plot of my tale. You are not required to go into that much detail, but "there's this thing which does this very generic thing" is useless to everyone, yourself included.
You can totally include a note to clarify stuff about which you've thought but don't know how to write yet. However, that should be done in addition to at least some portion of the article which is already written. Otherwise, critiquing an effectively non-existent draft will lead to nowhere. As said above, we are also open to criticizing ideas, however they should be well presented and you must remember that there's an implicit "well, I think this will most likely go this way. Of course, it ultimately depends on your execution of the concept…".
Okay I've added some more stuff to the living trenches draft
http://scpsandbox2.wikidot.com/jackuelar
E: Yeah i though that would be at least somewhat weird.
I regret to inform you that is it in fact considered unusual to do so publicly. If you want a particular user to review your draft, the more acceptable way to do so would be to contact them privately through PM or chat.
There's not enough there for review.
Admin, SCP Wiki
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