SCP-4944 / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page SCP-4944.

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ResearcherPie 05 Mar 2019 22:04

I guess you could say I was really quite thirsty,
And that's a statement I can say real firmly,
For the longer I looked at it my thirst starts to grow,
All I wanted was a damn cup o' joe.

I tried to get through but something resisted,
Something invisible was there and existed.
All I needed was some freakin' caffeine,
That god damn coffee machine.

So yeah, this exists now.
Thanks to UraniumEmpire, JustPoko, and Zyn for the critiques, I really appreciate it.

First Image is by me, second image is here, and edited by me.

m͎o͎r͎e͎ ͎b͎y͎ ͎m͎e͎

_{Yes, I did take my coffee machine into the freezing cold back yard to take that picture, and no, I am not proud of it. Okay… maybe a little proud.}

Last edited on 10 Mar 2019 17:37 by ResearcherPie Show more

Zyn 06 Mar 2019 07:57

Yes, I did take my coffee machine into the freezing cold back yard to take that picture, and no, I am not proud of it.

I say you should be proud. I took a picture of a roach for an SCP. One of my co-authors purposely ordered a gross-looking pizza for an SCP.

These are the things we do for our craft

Zzuxon 10 Mar 2019 02:44

I took a picture of a sieve I pee in when I get kidney stones for an SCP.

ResearcherPie 10 Mar 2019 03:18

that is disgusting, but I mean … you do what you gotta do ?

Zzuxon 10 Mar 2019 04:31

The sieve gave me the SCP idea, so I kind of owed it to the little guy.

IAmTheOoga 06 Mar 2019 00:27

Don't care, need bean.

+1

Nykacolaquantum 06 Mar 2019 01:15

Well-written, but the "anomalous object talks like an 'ironic' twitter user" shtick is really starting to wear thin, in my opinion.

Novoting.

ResearcherPie 06 Mar 2019 01:35

I agree, this cliche is becoming very popular. The goal of the whole talking shtick was to really grab that weird and absurd plot I was going for. I respect your choice.

Last edited on 06 Mar 2019 01:52 by ResearcherPie Show more

anamazingfantasy 06 Mar 2019 03:05

Ahhh, finally. An SCP I can relate with.
On an actual note, I was pleasantly caught off guard with this wacky entry! Definite +1 here!

Last edited on 06 Mar 2019 03:06 by anamazingfantasy Show more

ResearcherPie 06 Mar 2019 03:10

Thanks for reading ! This idea actually came from my own coffee machine (seen in the actual entry) because the loud ass fog-horn noises it makes.

Zyn 06 Mar 2019 07:54

I actually don't drink coffee, but my coworker can't survive without the stuff. I need to get him a shirt with "Don't care, need bean." on it.

So, I liked this a lot in the ideas stage, and I'm glad to see it on the mainsite! The table is hilarious and just the right amount of punchy (I've seen lots of drafts with hecking looooonng table content, so this is a nice change of pace for me). I almost feel like you don't necessarily need the experiment log since the rest entertained me just fine, but I love the dialogue.

ETA: general note, might want to swap "sentience" with "sapience" and make the Footnotes left-justified? It seems a little weird to have them centered.

+1 for quirky boat that just needs the coffee!

Last edited on 06 Mar 2019 07:55 by Zyn Show more

TheHouseOfBalloons 06 Mar 2019 13:42

I’ll always upvote a fellow coffee lover

Last edited on 06 Mar 2019 13:42 by TheHouseOfBalloons Show more

Faraday Cage 06 Mar 2019 14:54

Honestly, I feel that this one is an interesting idea held back from being its best by some issues with clunky word flow, run-on sentences, and a dash of non-clinical tone.

Here are a few examples:

"The substance produced by SCP-4944 does not have any hazardous effects, but is extremely viscid, and has high levels of glucose and gelatin, causing the fluid to be highly sweet when tasted."
Break this up into smaller sentences.

"A test was conducted on SCP-4944 to answer several questions."
Non-clinical tone. Just call it an interview, or label it as "sentience test (id#)

"After several more questions, it is confirmed "
Clinical tone, present tense abuse. try something like "has been determined"

ResearcherPie 06 Mar 2019 21:35

Thanks! Fixed the stuff you mentioned.

GoopLovesYou 06 Mar 2019 14:59

in case a of failure to bring caffeine

Did you mean an of?

ResearcherPie 06 Mar 2019 21:28

Yup. Fixed.

JimmyBoyHaha 08 Mar 2019 01:26

"Coffe. drinky drinky."

Slammed the upvote button.

---

This is my wacky forum signature. You laugh at how wacky it is. Such a perfectly absurd forum signature is exactly the type of thing to make you giggle. Your entire life: It's all been leading up to this moment. Reading my crazy forum signature. All these years, all your struggles have been worth it. It's all downhill from here. All downhill from JimmyBoyHaha's forum signature.

Thank you.

ResearcherPie 09 Mar 2019 04:24

I hope the upvote button is okay. Thanks.

Deadcanons 21 Mar 2019 06:05

This is great. The title is fucking amazing too. I was laughing just waiting for the article to load.

I think the extended test log is a bit unnecessary? It gets a little dado-y at that point. But that's certainly not enough to ruin the charm of a great article. Big +1.

Deadcanons 21 Mar 2019 06:08

I'm back cause I keep laughing at this. Imagine the field agents trying to retrieve this thing and walking into the invisible side of the ship and running their hands along the entire fucking thing and slowly realizing with horror that it's a goddamn ship. Like that scene in Star Trek IV. This is so funny, great work.

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