Note to all Researchers:
Please include your name on all records, along with date and total number of items "refined".
Researchers are responsible for all "Output". Should damage or loss of life occur, the researcher will be subject to administrative review and possible disciplinary action.
Biological testing has been suspended. Any biological testing must be cleared by O5 Command.
Test Log Format:
All test logs should be written in this form.
Name:
Date: DD/MM/YYYY
Total Items:
Input:
Setting:
Output:
<- Notice: Continued from 17XX.
Test 914-1800
Name: Junior Researcher Evangeline Perry
Date: 18/05/2021
Total Items: Three dish brushes
Input: One dish brush
Setting: 1:1
Output: An oversized toothbrush
Note: Finally a toothbrush large enough for my mouth if you'd ask my mom. - J.R. Perry
Input: One dish brush
Setting: Fine
Output: One plastic sculpture of a hedgehog with the brush hairs functioning as the spines.
Input: One dish brush
Setting: Very Fine
Output: An animate plastic orb with the bristles evenly distributed across its surface. It attempted to roll towards the closest dish it considered ''dirty''. It tried to clean said dishes, but did not have adequate force to clear off food debris effectively. After 2 minutes of ''trying'', it became inert and did not respond any longer. Result incinerated.
Test 914-1801
Name: Dr. N Rose
Date: 18/05/2021
Total Items: Twelve Infrared Laser Thermometer Guns
Note: During this test, the thermometers will be shortened to ILTG for brevity. - Dr. Rose
Rough and Coarse Tests omitted for brevity
Input: One of the aforementioned ILTGs
Setting: 1:1
Output: One pulse oximeter
Input: One of the aforementioned ILTGs
Setting: Fine
Output: An identical ILTG. When used by any individual, the output works in conjunction to a heat ray often used by riot control, albeit with a limited amount of use. While not lethal, the output’s “rays” do cause mild burns to any location it is aimed at. The monitor reads the area of effectiveness the output has, instead of showing the temperature.
Input: One of the aforementioned ILTGs
Setting: Fine
Output: A NERF brand plastic blaster resembling the Firestrike variant. Notably, the pull handle used to “cock” the blaster is replaced with a small screen. Activating the blaster via loading a standard NERF dart causes the screen to turn on, showing the number 350. Beside the screen are dials, of which the right dial causes the number to be either raised or lowered. Through testing, it is revealed the number refers to the distance the dart will travel, with the value being centimeters. The dial to the left instead cycles what the dart will perform upon hitting a surface or being. Listed below are a few examples.
Dart Action | Result |
Break | The dart shatters on impact similar to sugar glass. A small dent is formed in the surface, or it breaks the bone related to the location where an individual is shot |
Heal | Only works on biological matter. Any injuries shot will heal at an accelerated pace. However, if the injury requires surgery, it will not heal and instead do nothing |
Penetrate | The dart works like a standard bullet, penetrating the matter. Depth of penetration, or if it goes through all vary on the matter type. The dart remains intact throughout the procedure |
TQ | Only works on biological matter. Works as a tranquilizer dart. However, the effectiveness of the dart is equal, and possibly more powerful, to Ketamine. Any individual shot by the dart will enter a comatose state for a minimum time period of 8 hours. The maximum period is unclear. |
Drain | Causes all forms of liquid matter to drain from the target until the subject is completely barren of any liquid. Will induce damage to certain materials, and death by exsanguination and dehydration for biological matter |
Bolster | Increases the durability and strength of all matter the dart hits. However, this effect continues until eventual destruction of said matter. Individuals hit by the dart will act as if affected by steroids with a magnified effect, before having their skeleton crumble under the weight of the increased muscle mass after a period of two hours |
Melt | Causes all matter struck by the dart to melt in a similar style when exposed to molten rock. Should the material be composed of matter that would make molten rock, the material will remain the same. On biological matter, all matter melts in the same way. There is no survivability. |
Note: Whoever thought it was a good idea to suggest this could be a great way to lure 106 during its escapes, you can personally be the guinea pig if you continue to suggest this level of idiocy. We don’t know the full extent of its abilities, and frankly, I don’t want to find out someone died because they found an explosive setting. It’s going into storage. - Dr. Rose
Input: Three of the aforementioned ILTGs
Setting: Fine
Output: A small screen with a finger scanner. When an individual places their finger on said scanner, blood is anomalously drained from the finger despite no sign of entry to the finger itself. On the screen, all medical information related to the cardiovascular system and their internal temperature. After a period of three minutes, the subject’s blood will continually drain from the scanned finger. All attempts to cease the flow without removal of the finger have failed. Amputation is the only method to stop the effect, and reattaching the finger brings the effect back. After a period of 120 hours, the subject dies due to exsanguination.
Input: One of the aforementioned ILTGs
Setting: Very Fine
Output: An identical ILTG. The device is constantly in an activated state, with no discernable way to deactivate it. When directed at an individual, the screen begins to detail all the medical information of the subject. While this occurs, the subject will collapse and enter a seizure. Continued analysis prolongs the seizure, but not the severity and reports the subject to be healing. As the device continues being held, the temperature of the device also raises, reaching painful levels when in contact with human skin. Releasing it reduces the effect until the device is at a room temperature heat. The resulting seizures have been confirmed non-lethal, however they are quite severe, with a 37% of epilepsy being diagnosed after recovery
Input: Three of the aforementioned ILTGs
Setting: Very Fine
Output: An orb of light
Addendum: Following the output being taken from the booth, the device activated and proceeded to anomalously float in the testing chamber. Extreme heat reaching 1407°C and light barred safe entry and visual identification, and any individuals within the chamber were incinerated. Device was disarmed following the use of the H20 9000, revealing an identical ILTG, severely charred and irreparable with an etching of an unreadable sentence and a Leviathan Cross symbol beneath. A researcher assisting with the tests noticed the cross and immediately left the area to procure a bible; said researcher was stated to be of the Catholic faith post-test. As the researcher returned, the output ignited with a red and orange hue, until doused in more water and biblical verses were recited. Output disintegrated following application of water and verses. Documentation photos taken during the inanimate stage of the etching were transferred to a language department to determine the sentence; of which was found to read Exodus and Ruler in Latin. Documenting photos have since been placed in a folder and held in Anomalous Storage.
Test 914-1802
Name: Junior Researcher Zen
Date: 18/05/2021
Total Items: Three CO2 fire extinguishers
Note: Due to the explosion risk, the Rough and Coarse test won't be executed. - Junior Researcher Zen
Input: One CO2 fire extinguisher
Setting: 1:1
Output: A fire extinguisher, different brand and model
Input: One CO2 fire extinguisher
Setting: Fine
Output: A similar fire extinguisher with a hand-pump on the top of it that was discovered to refill the extinguisher with new CO2 filtered from the air. Unfortunately, due to the small amounts of CO2 in the air and the limited effectiveness of a hand pump, the process of refilling is very slow. No anomalous properties were found.
Input: One CO2 fire extinguisher
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A similar extinguisher with a greater weight. When the Output chamber was opened, the present D-Class felt the air being sucked inside, presumably due to an underpressure. Tests revealed that the extinguisher now shoots a mix of CO2 and N2 in liquid form (the most of although vaporizes just coming out) at a pressure of 300 bars and a temperature of -170 C°. It is believed that the azote was taken from the chamber, explaining the underpressure. The capacity to resist pressure of the object is beyond the actual possibilities but it's believed to be non-anomalous and simply a modification of the metal structure to make it capable of resisting that pressure. The D-Class that tested it is now being treated for the gangrene on his hand caused by the sudden drop in temperature. Due to the high pressure, destroying the object is considered too dangerous and it is stored in the Anomalous Storage.
Test 914-1803
Name: Junior Researcher Zen
Date: 18/05/2021
Total Items: Five wooden bows, thirty wooden arrows
Input: One wooden bow, six arrows
Setting: Rough
Output: A pile of wood splinters, metal splinters, and pieces of synthetic feathers.
Input: One wooden bow, six arrows
Setting: Coarse
Output: Each component, neatly separated.
Input: One wooden bow, six arrows
Setting: 1:1
Output: A pair of tomahawks, which are throwing weapons of Native American origins. Some feathers and wood splinters, presumably the ones in excess, were in a separate pile.
Input: One wooden bow, six arrows
Setting: Fine
Output: A crossbow and eight darts. The bowstring has a complicated multiple-passage system to give it elasticity in a shorter space. Some metal pieces are included in the crossbow, like a metal trigger and a tiny metal sight. The crossbow has high precision but no anomalous properties were found.
Input: One wooden bow and six arrow
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One wooden bow and six arrows, physically identical to the input. During the test, it was discovered that when used, the arrow binds itself to the user's hand, causing the user to accelerate forward with the arrow when it is released. The effect ceases when the user or the arrow hits something.
Addendum: During a test a D-Class, a skilled archer, was able to use his other hand to grab the bow during the shot, allowing him to become airborne multiple times in a row until he tried to jump on a suspended light on the ceiling that immediately broke and made him fall, resulting in moderate injuries.
Test 914-1804
Name: Researcher Andrew Moore
Date: 18/05/2021
Total Items: One personnel dossier for Andrew Moore; one bottle of cat spray, used for disciplining domesticated cats
Input: Personnel Dossier
Setting: 1:1
Output: One personnel dossier for "Researcher Emily Moore", closely matching Researcher Moore's background and achievements. There is no record of an Emily Moore having worked at the Foundation, and Researcher Moore has no relatives with the name.
Note: I have no idea what this means, but I have a weird feeling it will be very important down the line. I'm keeping this in my desk. - Researcher Moore
Input: One bottle of cat spray
Setting: Fine
Output: One bottle of "spray cat". When used, it produces a cat with an average age of 2 years. A wide range of breeds have been observed. Cats evaporate after around 30 minutes if left alone, and near-instantly if terminated, making autopsies impossible. Item incinerated.
Test 914-1805
Name: Researcher A. Lopez, Researcher R. Skye
Date: 18/05/2021
Total Items: Three origami papers, a copy of Researcher R. Skye's ID
Input: Origami papers folded to the style of a cuboctahedron with a drawing of a rectangle in one of the squares in marker
Setting: Fine
Output: A flat sheet of thick paper in a rectangular shape with faded ink. When D-13423 picked up the sheet of paper, began cheering, and when questioned, said that he explained how "he now has a billion credits to buy an Asp". After removing the output, D-13423 returned to normal.
Note: Not sure if he means a snake or anything, but credits aren't a currency. - A. Lopez
Input: The aforementioned ID card
Setting: Fine
Output: An ID card. Screening showed that the output is a genuine Foundation ID card with no changes.
Note: I've been expecting anything but normal, and it gives me normal. - R. Skye
Test 914-1806
Name: Junior Researcher Davidson
Date: 19/05/2021
Total Items: Four passenger car tires
Input: One tire
Setting: Rough
Output: Two halves of a tire
Input: One tire
Setting: 1:1
Output: A tire with a different tread
Input: One tire
Setting: Fine
Output: A tire that can adapt its size to fit any wheel. During testing, it was discovered that it only adapts to the wheels of Honda cars. When the wheel was removed from the Honda car, the tire removed itself and returned to its original form. The tire also changes its tread to fit the current season of the year.
Input: One tire
Setting: Very Fine
Output: An animate tire that is impervious to most damage. When attacked, the output will bounce at the attacker until they go out of range, at which point it will begin to self-repair. When within range of a vehicle, the output attempts to attach itself to its wheel, and the only way to remove it is to remove the entire wheel from the vehicle, at which point the output will detach itself from the wheel and return to its original form.
Test 914-1807
Name: Junior Researcher Boneka
Date: 20/05/2021
Total Items: Assorted LEGO DUPLO bricks in varying colors and shapes, one LEGO Assembly Square set #10255 (unassembled in box)
Note: After some discussion with the other personnel a little while ago, we decided to do a series of tests using LEGO bricks. Everyone got to choose which sets or bricks they wanted to input, as well as whether or not they wanted to assemble them prior to putting them through 914. I strongly urge everybody in the facility to ensure that they are wearing adequate footwear (which you should be already) so as to not get injured by stepping on any stray pieces. For my first two tests, I'll be using DUPLO bricks, which are larger and simpler versions of the original LEGO bricks that are meant to be handled by toddlers. - JR Boneka
Input: Assorted LEGO DUPLO bricks
Setting: Fine
Output: Physically unaltered LEGO DUPLO bricks. Testing with a D-Class reveals that the bricks expose a cognitohazard to anybody using them that makes them mentally incapable of being able to put together or separate the bricks.
Addendum: After further testing, it was discovered that Junior Researchers and interns are not affected by the cognitohazard and are thus capable of manipulating the output without any complications.
Note: It's calling us toddlers. I feel mildly insulted, but I did choose to do my test using toys meant for children, so I suppose I just won stupid prizes. The next test will be conducted using a much more complex set. - JR Boneka
Input: One LEGO Assembly Square set #10255 (unassembled in box)
Setting: Fine
Output: One LEGO set (unassembled in box) resembling a standard SCP Foundation site. The fully-constructed model includes containment chambers, personnel offices, and research labs, as well as several LEGO minifigures resembling researchers, MTF agents, D-Class personnel, and SCPs, specifically SCP-173, SCP-049, and SCP-682. A model of SCP-914 is also included in the set. The output has no anomalous properties, although it is noted that one of the doors to a containment chamber does not shut properly due to a construction error present in the instruction manual that prevents it from swinging all the way.
Test 914-1808
Name: Weapons Researcher Sam Szymons
Date: 20/05/2021
Total Items: One limited edition LEGO Millennium Falcon set #7190 (disassembled in box)
Input: Aforementioned LEGO box
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A visually unchanged set. Anomalous effects manifest when the set has been fully assembled. Individual pieces will periodically detach themselves from the complete model, meaning that constant maintenance is required in order to put the loose pieces back in place before the model completely disassembles itself. Whenever the output has fully disassembled itself, every loose piece will be launched at varying speeds in all directions. Output incinerated after the set “exploded” a second time.
Test 914-1809
Name: Junior Researcher Davidson
Date: 20/05/2021
Total Items: Three LEGO Mindstorms "Robot Inventor" sets #51515
Input: One robotic vehicle built using the "Robot Inventor“ set
Setting: Coarse
Output: Unassembled LEGO bricks and wiring
Input: One "Robot Inventor“ set
Setting: 1:1
Output: A fully assembled four-legged LEGO robot which is able to move by itself
Input: One "Robot Inventor“ set
Setting: Fine
Output: A humanoid LEGO robot with different kinds of LEGO gear. The gear is composed of a sword, a hammer, a shield and a brick launcher. When the gear was tested, the sword was discovered to be sharpened. The hammer had the properties of a full size hammer except for the fact that anytime it hit something, it damaged itself due to the fact that it is made out of plastic. The shield was able to deflect all attacks with minimal damage to itself and the brick launcher was discovered to be loaded with sharpened LEGO sticks which were discovered to not be dangerous except for the fact that they can pierce a person. The robot is able to replenish these sticks only when given more more unsharpened LEGO sticks. Stored in Anomalous Storage.
Test 914-1810
Name: Researcher MacLean
Date: 20/05/2021
Total Items: Various LEGO motors and gears
Input: One LEGO motor, various LEGO gears
Setting: Fine
Output: A small plastic car. The casing is composed of the same material as the motor’s original casing. Disassembly shows that there is no way to connect a battery to the motor, making it unusable.
Input: Various LEGO gears
Setting: Fine
Output: A wind-up mainspring, made of plastic. The mainspring is extremely efficient, but has no attachment points, making it unable to be integrated into a clockwork system.
Note: We have a motor set that doesn’t accept a power source, and a power source that can’t be attached to anything. Let's see if we can’t get anything interesting out of them. - Researcher MacLean
Input: One LEGO motor, various LEGO gears, the previous two outputs
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A cube of composed of plastic gears and wheels, appearing to move and rotate at random. The cube is powered by a device that generates power when moved, resulting in the cube being powered by both its own movements and the vibrations of the surface it is placed on. The device was broken during attempted disassembly and rendered nonfunctional.
Test 914-1811
Name: Junior Researcher Syc Abrams
Date: 20/05/2021
Total Items: A set of assorted LEGO bricks in varying shapes, colours and sizes
Input: The aforementioned set of bricks
Setting: Fine
Output: A plastic gramophone assembled using the LEGO bricks. However, the output lacks an arm typically found on a gramophone. Testing also revealed that the output contains a cognitohazardous effect that causes anyone within 5m to perceive the gramophone as playing their favorite song. Removing even a single brick from the output ends the effect, but replacing said brick causes the effect to resume. Using a brick of a different colour to replace the missing brick also causes the effect to resume.
Addendum: Further testing revealed that the cognitohazardous effect is entirely lost if the output is completely disassembled and subsequently reassembled, thus accidentally neutralising the output.
Test 914-1812
Name: Intern Beauvillier
Date: 20/05/2021
Total Items: Two sets of assorted LEGO bricks, containing diverse bricks of various shapes, colours, and sizes. The set also contains a small plastic tool designed to assist in disassembling lego pieces.
Note: This is a standard building set, containing regular pieces. Enough to build almost anything. - Intern Beauvillier
Input: A set of assorted LEGO bricks
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A visibly unchanged set. However, disassembling two bricks that were connected together is physically impossible, without using the specific tool that was provided with the set itself.
Disassembling bricks with the brick disassembler gets the brick stuck to the disassembler, and it is impossible to disassemble them without a second disassembler, to which the bricks disassembled from the first will attach themselves to and get stuck to. Even though the entire assemblage still works as a disassembler and can separate two assembled bricks, it is highly unpractical as bricks will still be unusable.
Input: Same as before
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A plastic box containing an extremely thick liquid made out of plastic, and a plastic hammer, supposedly made with the unassembling tool. Molding the liquid into specific forms is possible due to its high viscosity. Hitting the liquid with the hammer will anomalously solidify the liquid in a 5 centimeters radius of the impact zone, allowing other LEGO bricks to connect to the solidified area. Hitting a solidified area with the hammer will turn it back to liquid.
Test 914-1813
Name: Junior Researcher Reimer
Date: 20/05/2021
Total Items: Two LEGO Architecture Willis Tower sets #21000 (not assembled)
Input: One of the aforementioned sets
Setting: 1:1
Output: A LEGO Architecture set of the One World Trade Center, numbered #21800. LEGO is not known to have produced such a set.
Input: One of the aforementioned sets
Setting: Fine
Output: A LEGO Architecture set of the Palace of Culture and Science (PKiN), Warsaw. When assembled, an anomalous property manifests, wherein all biological matter in direct contact with the object disappeared.
Addendum: All personnel who disappeared later reappeared in their original locations. According to their accounts, they were transported into the Congress Hall of the PKiN, after which they were able to explore the interior of the building. No deviations from the actual building was noted, and all personnel and items return to their original location after exactly 1176 minutes. Object has been incinerated afterwards.
Test 914-1814
Name: Dr. N Rose
Date: 20/05/2021
Total Items: Three LEGO Star Wars Super Star Destroyer sets #10221
Note: Two of the sets remain disassembled in their boxes. The third is constructed, and the box and schematics will be included in the test. - Dr. Rose
Input: One of the aforementioned sets (disassembled in box)
Setting: 1:1
Output: One LEGO Star Wars Venator-Class Republic Attack Cruiser set #8039
Note: I won’t lie, I did wish that 914 would bring out a Spaceball One model. Disappointing, however results are results. The model is cleared and placed into storage. - Dr. Rose
Input: One of the aforementioned sets (disassembled in box)
Setting: Fine
Output: An unchanged box, When the box is opened, the LEGO pieces vibrate rapidly within their plastic set bags, before tearing them all at once and becoming a large mass of loose pieces. The pieces, when at rest, act in a manner similar to a Non-Newtonian fluid. When the pieces are used in the appropriate fashion, they will construct into any structure the amount of pieces will allow. Adding pieces do not add to the effect, and will simply fall away or be moved by the active pieces. Testing is ongoing.
Input: One of the aforementioned sets (assembled)
Setting: Fine
Output: An anomalously flying model of an Imperial Star Destroyer. As the model flies, it will do so in a circular fashion, not deviating from the pattern until the box it was previously contained in is moved; the box itself is the focal point, with the model circling it constantly. Despite its movement, the model is destructible, and will crash into any surface obstructing its path. When reconstructed, the model will resume flying. Any attempt to construct the model with different pieces or with a modified design will not result in flight. The model also anomalously capable of minor communication with radios, however the model only transmits quotes from the series.
Test 914-1815
Name: Junior Researcher Faris
Date: 20/05/2021
Total Items: Three green 2x4 LEGO bricks
Input: The aforementioned bricks
Setting: Coarse
Output: Three green 2x4 LEGO bricks. Upon being touched during retrieval by JR Faris, the bricks proceeded to explode into a fine dust, covering the output booth and nearby area with a layer of plastic. Later analysis showed the dust to be microscopic LEGO bricks, which are near-impossible to connect due to their size. The output booth was thoroughly cleaned and a bag of collected particulate has been placed in storage pending further analysis of its microscopic construction. JR Faris suffered no lasting ill effects due to proper use of protective equipment.
Test 914-1816
Name: Junior Researcher Evangeline Perry
Date: 20/05/2020
Total items: One 2x4 LEGO brick (pink)
Input: One 2x4 LEGO brick (pink)
Setting: Fine
Output: One 2x4 LEGO brick (black). When not looked at directly and if a step is taken within 2 square meters of it, it will anomalously manifest inside the shoe of that individual before their foot is put down. Two Jr. Researchers were brought to the hospital wing after a chain reaction affected 11 personnel until J.R. Perry stayed on the ground and removed her shoe, allowing her to keep looking at it until it could be incinerated.
Note: So much for adequate footwear. - J.R. Boneka
Note: So now I know why my mom wanted me to clean my room. - J.R. Perry
Test 914-1817
Name: Intern François Beauvillier
Date: 24/05/2021
Total Items: A Snecma-88 Jet engine, typically used in the French Rafale aircraft.
Input: A Snecma-88 Jet engine
Setting: Coarse
Output: A Snecma-88 Jet engine, disassembled into parts, according to their use, such as turbines, compressors, fuel injectors, etc.
Input: Previous output
Setting: Coarse
Output: The precedent parts, disassembled in pieces. They were neatly arranged on the floor of the output booth and sorted by size.
Input: Previous output
Setting: Coarse
Output: All the pieces, disassembled into their core components. For example, wires were separated from their insulation, and pipes were separated into segments.
Input: Previous output
Setting: Coarse
Output: Piles of small bricks composed of diverse materials and metals such as rubber, steel, tin, lead, or copper. All bricks were of the same size of 3.538 cm by 3.538 cm by 6.96 mm.
Note: Each of these brick is exactly a hundredth of the size of the original jet engine. - Intern François Beauvillier
Input: Previous output
Setting: Coarse
Output: Single blocks composed of the jet engine's materials.
Note: The following test might be extremely dangerous. We are reaching extreme disassembly levels. It will be conducted by me and the output will be retrieved by a D-Class wearing a Hazardous Material protection suit. - Intern Beauvillier
Input: Previous output
Setting: Coarse
Output: Multiple large piles of powder, presumably composed each from the individual atoms composing the jet engine.
Addenda:
TIMELINE OF THE EVENTS:
At T+0 seconds, D-20243, who was sent to retrieve the output opened the Output booth.
At T+0.22 seconds all visual contact was lost, both for cameras and eyewitnesses. Note that the camera were still functional at the time.
At T+4 seconds, the camera feed was cut due to technical malfunctions.
At T+8 seconds, D-20243 said he felt "extremely uncomfortable, like [his] insides were being rubbed with sand paper". At the same moment, Intern Beauvillier requested immediate lockdown of the room, including hermetically sealing the door to the room and closing all aeration vents.
At T+15 seconds, the D-Class reported extreme difficulty to breathe, with what felt like "a billion needles in [his] throat", and requested to be let out immediately. His request wasn't acknowledged.
At T+17 seconds, he let out a scream of help, described as "guttural" by the security agents.
At T+20 seconds, the D-Class expired.
At T+36 seconds, as Intern Beauvillier understood the nature of the output, he requested use of the H20-9000 and sprayed the door in its entirety. Then, he requested all nearby test personnel to leave the room and corridor, and lock themselves in a hermetical room.
At T+185, after ensuring all people were secured, Intern Beauvillier took the H2O-9000 again, activated the emergency sprinklers, and opened the door to Testing Cell 109-B. A grey cloud came out of the room, but was quickly stopped via the combined use of the H2O-9000 and the sprinklers.
NATURE OF THE OUTPUT: Subsequent analysis showed that the cubes were disassembled into their smallest possible state, atoms. When the Output booth was opened, the air movement caused the powder to lift extremely suddenly and rapidly, spreading throughout the entire room. Their size allowed the particles to penetrate the tiniest gaps, including in the camera, causing dysfunctions, but also in the joints between the air canisters attached to the Hazmat Suit and the pipes linking them to the suit itself. The D-Class was breathing iron atoms for 20 seconds, causing his death. Autopsy revealed extremely severe lacerations of the respiratory ducts and complete destruction of the lungs. When Intern Beauvillier opened the door, the cloud spread out of the testing cell, but most of the particles were caught in the water barrage and got stuck down on the floor. However, some passed through, and were inhaled by Intern Beauvillier, who was on scene with the H2O-9000. He is currently in the med-bay, being treated for acute lung irritation. After combined effort from the security guards in the facility, the amount of dangerous particles in the air was reduced to low levels, sufficient to render the air breathable. Further filtration efforts are still ongoing, but the conditions are harmless, except in case of permanent exposure in Cell 109-B. Unexpectedly, SCP-914 stayed completely clean.
Note: I think I just proved the dangers of a mostly unexplored setting. This should serve as an example on the dangers of SCP-914, and how unexpected the outputs may be, even with settings we thought safe. - Intern François Beauvillier
Test 914-1818
Name: Researcher Connolly, J.R. Evangeline Perry
Date: 26/05/2021
Total Items: One photo of Researcher Connolly, one photo of J.R. Evangeline Perry
Note: I want to see if 914 can form patterns based on people with limited interaction. J.R. Perry has graciously accepted my request for a volunteer, given that we have not interacted much. - Researcher Connolly
Input: Both of the above photos
Setting: Fine
Output: Two photos, one of Researcher Connolly and one of J.R. Perry. The contents of the photos have changed noticeably, with Researcher Connolly in an elaborate cosplay of Lady Dimitrescu from Resident Evil Village. J.R. Perry appears in cosplay as the character Heisenberg, the brother of Lady Dimitrescu, from the same game.
Note: Not what I expected. - J.R. Perry
Note: And yet, not altogether unpleasant. It really got the likeness down. - Researcher Connolly
Test 914-1819
Name: Junior Researcher S. Reid
Date: 28/05/2021
Total Items: Five ''useless'' machines
Note: A “useless” machine is a small acrylic box containing electronic device with a single switch on the top and a metal rod hidden inside the box. When the switch changes position, the device’s arm is driven by an electric motor to emerge from the device and change the switch to its original position. This test is to see how 914’s tendency to create functionally useless outputs will interact with an input that is designed to be useless. – Junior Researcher S. Reid
Input: One “useless” machine
Setting: Rough
Output: The original input, severely damaged. Object seems to have been subjected to extreme compressing force, not unlike what would be expected to happen if it were crushed under a hydraulic press.
Input: One “useless” machine
Setting: Coarse
Output: The acrylic box that housed the device, unchanged. All components have been removed and are arranged compactly inside the box.
Input: One “useless” machine
Setting: 1:1
Output: One small box made of metal with an acrylic switch on the top. The box contains a complex system of acrylic clockworks that result in a completely mechanical version of a “useless” machine. Changing the switch causes an acrylic rod, driven mechanically by the clockworks, to change the switch to its original position. None of the electrical components of the input are present. Further testing showed the metal box is made from an alloy of all the metals present in the switch, metal rod, and electrical components.
Note: This alloy should be impossible to make, as should many of the smaller acrylic pieces inside the box. – Junior Researcher S. Reid
Input: One “useless” machine
Setting: Fine
Output: One miniature model of SCP-914. An exact analysis could not be conducted due to the extreme complexity of 914’s internal workings. The only apparent change is the selection panel, which only possesses the 1:1 setting. Device has no anomalous properties.
Note: If I didn’t know better, I would say this is 914 admitting itself to be a slightly more complex useless machine. – Junior Researcher S. Reid
Input: One “useless” machine
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One featureless black orb made of a theoretically impossible plastic/metal alloy. Internal scans have shown the object to be solid. Has an anomalous effect that causes a human that touches it to have a vision of an event that will occur in the near future. These visions seem to be presented in such a way that the subject cannot do anything to change the events that they see. Once an individual receives a vision, they will not receive another one for 24hrs. Extensive tests were done. Most tests resulted in visions with minimal substance, such a researcher dropping a pen, or checking their watch. A list of notable tests has been compiled below.
Subject | Vision | Results |
---|---|---|
D-49678 | D-49678 dropping the output on her foot. | D-49678 was startled by the vision and dropped the output on her foot. Output was undamaged. |
D-49678 (test conducted 24hrs after initial test) | Junior Researcher S. Reid asking D-49678 to recount the details of the vision. | Junior Researcher S. Reid asked D-49678 to recount the details of her vision |
D-55868 | Junior Researcher S. Reid sucking his thumb. | While transcribing the events of the vison, Junior Researcher S. Reid received a papercut on his thumb and instinctively sucked on the wound |
D-65412 | D-65412 being restrained by security. | D-65412 refused to co-operate, stating “If I don’t tell ya what’s gonna happen, then it ain’t gonna happen”. D-65412 was restrained by security and escorted back to D-Class Personnel Residence. While being escorted, D-65412 alluded to security the nature of his vision. “But I didn’t tell ya. How did it still happen?” |
D-12589 | D-55868 spilling water on themselves. | Surveillance recordings confirm that D-55868 spilled water on themself a few seconds after this test took place. |
D-12589 (this test was conducted 24hrs after the initial test) | D-12589 sees Junior Researcher S. Reid checking their driver’s licence. | When asked what they saw in their vision, D-12589 quoted Junior Researcher S. Reid’s licence number. Junior Researcher S. Reid immediately checked his licence to confirm. After confirming, D-12589 was asked how they knew this and stated they had seen Junior Researcher S. Reid checking his licence. |
D-79356 | D-79356 stubbed their toe on a desk. | D-79356 was surprised by the vision and took a step backwards. This caused them to lose their balance, taking a recovery step forwards. As they did so, they stubbed their toe on a desk. |
Junior Researcher S. Reid (testing was cleared after extensive data showed the visions to be safe) | SCP-204 breaching containment at Site-██. | by the time Junior Researcher S. Reid reported this vision, Site-██ was already in a Code: Red lockdown due to SCP-204 breaching containment. |
Note: Further testing to see if this can be used as an early warning system is pending. Practical use seems unlikely given the nature of 914. Output moved to Anomalous Storage. – Junior Researcher S. Reid
Test 914-1820
Name: Junior Researcher Davidson
Date: 01/06/2021
Total Items: Two half USD coins, one 50 USD bill
Input: One half USD coin
Setting: Coarse
Output: Copper and nickel dust
Input: One 50 USD bill
Setting: 1:1
Output: A 100 Czech crown bill
Input: One half USD coin
Setting: Fine
Output: One half USD coin exhibiting a cognitohazard that makes people without protective goggles think it is a full dollar.
Test 914-1821
Name: Dr. N Rose
Date: 05/06/2021
Total Items: Six tongue depressors
Note: These are literally wooden popsicle sticks. I had a few of these lying around in the medbay and I hadn’t used any in a while. May as well put them to use. - Dr. Rose
[Rough and Coarse tests omitted for brevity]
Input: One of the aforementioned depressors
Setting: 1:1
Output: A popsicle stick similar to those used for Magnum brand ice-creams
Input: One of the aforementioned depressors
Setting: Fine
Output: An identical popsicle stick. When the stick is placed inside an individual’s mouth, the stick will adhere itself to the tongue or roof of the mouth. Removing the stick is regarded as extremely painful and results in severe damage to the gums and teeth, should it connect with the teeth in any way. Surgical removal is possible, and is considered the only safe way to remove the stick.
Input: One of the aforementioned depressors
Setting: Fine
Output: A small amount of toothpicks. During testing, the toothpicks worked as normal and showed no anomalous effects.
Addendum: Further testing revealed that the toothpicks shattered very easily and get sharper with each destruction, and individuals would come under a cognitohazardous effect that compels them to continue to use the toothpicks, despite their size, dangers, and the lack of foreign matter between the subject's teeth. A D-Class used in testing suffered severe lacerations to the inside of their mouth and throat, requiring surgery to remove the toothpicks. All instances have been incinerated since testing concluded.
Input: One of the aforementioned depressors
Setting: Very Fine
Output: An identical depressor engraved with the phrase "Ahh!". A cognitohazard affects anyone who views it, and is forced to open their mouth beyond the capability granted naturally. At its worst, the mandible is dislocated from the cranium and leads to minor damage to the cheek tissues. At this point, the effect will cease entirely, though the individual will be unable to close their jaw until medical assistance is attained. Following reattachment surgery, the individual will be left with scar tissue on the sides of their face.
Test 914-1822
Name: Technical Researcher Corsac
Date: 19/06/2021
Total Items: One USB stick containing a photograph of SCP-914. The file is digitally signed with standard Foundation cryptography software, using a key that was generated specifically for this test.
Input: One USB stick as above
Setting: 1:1
Output: One USB stick containing a similar photograph of SCP-914, taken from a different angle. A valid digital signature was present, apparently created using the key that was generated for this test.
Note: This indicates a serious flaw in the cryptographic algorithms that were used for the test. Further research is pending. – TR Corsac
Test 914-1823
Name: Junior Researcher Singley
Date: 21/06/2021
Total Items: Three Hot Wheels brand miniature race cars
Input: One Hot Wheels brand miniature race car
Setting: 1:1
Output: One Metal Machines brand miniature race car
Input: One Hot Wheels brand miniature race car
Setting: Fine
Output: Identical to input. Testing showed that the car's axle had significantly less friction with the car's body than would be expected of a normal car of the same design. Comparison testing showed an average of a 67% increase in average distance traveled across a flat terrain relative to the unaltered model when equal force was applied to both cars.
Input: One Hot Wheels brand miniature race car
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A much more detailed version of the original car. The car has been modified to function as a working car, with any and all necessary components and machinery in order to be fueled, start the engine, and drive. However, the size of the vehicle and the non-durable materials it was originally constructed from make it impractical to run, drive, or even fuel.
Test 914-1824
Name: Researcher Laskenta
Date: 21/06/2021
Total Items: Three USB drives, each containing different photographs of Researcher Laskenta's office
Note: Standard Foundation cryptography can be compromised within less than ten minutes by 914, as test 914-1822 showed. As such, attempting to compromise other algorithms could give us an insight, if 914 is exploiting security vulnerabilities or using anomalous methods and could tell us if our algorithm is flawed. - Laskenta
Input: One USB drive as above, encrypted with RC4, an algorithm with severe security flaws
Setting: 1:1
Output: The input, encrypted with a different RC4 key. In a non-anomalous context, this is only possible by compromising or knowing the key. The photograph of Researcher Laskenta's office was found unaltered after breaking the new encryption.
Input: One USB drive as above, encrypted with AES, the standard encryption for classified documents in the USA
Setting: 1:1
Output: A plastic and metal plate, made out of the input. Several diagrams, taken from the Federal Information Processing Standards Publication 197, the document in which AES is defined, are engraved into the output. As all data has been lost, it is impossible to draw conclusions about SCP-914's cryptographic abilities.
Input: One USB drive as above, encrypted with one-time pad, an encryption technique that cannot be cracked with non-anomalous methods
Setting: 1:1
Output: The inputted USB drive, containing no coherent data. It is hypothesised that the content has been encrypted with a different one-time pad key, however, this cannot be proven. As it is equally probable that SCP-914 replaced the encrypted photograph with unreadable data, no conclusions can be drawn from this output as well.
Note: We- I didn't think this through when I scheduled only three tests. - Laskenta
Test 914-1825
Name: Junior Researcher Evangeline Perry and Medical Intern Rue Vos
Date: 23/06/2021
Total Items: Three physical copies of the video game League of Legends
Note: Because we both play it and hate it. - J.R. Perry
Input: A physical copy of the video game League of Legends
Setting: 1:1
Output: A physical copy of the video game Dota 2
Input: A physical copy of the video game League of Legends
Setting: Fine
Output: A physically unaltered copy of the video game League of Legends On testing, it was found that inserting the disc into a computer would automatically display a GIF of an animated salt shaker until the disc is ejected.
Input: A physical copy of the video game League of Legends
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A game disc box, blank, and a puddle of ink, used to print the previous League of Legends artwork. The game manual has been altered and now displays breathing exercises and tips on how to deal with anger issues. Attempting to insert the disc into a drive results in it auto-ejecting with enough speed and force to break the disc tray and embed itself into the wall.
Note: Turns out even the game itself is telling us to stop playing it, maybe it's time. - M.I. Vos
Note: Never. - J.R. Perry
Test 914-1826
Name: Junior Researcher Morganna
Date: 10/07/2021
Total Items: One standard lab coat, one kg each tungsten, tungsten carbide, and hardened steel
Input: Above items
Setting: Fine
Output: One metalized lab coat mannequin with no openings. Impervious to damage Anomalously dissipates all energy applied to it evenly throughout a spherical area with a 15-meter radius, centered on the object. Kinetic forces are applied radially outward, atom by atom, regardless of mass. Due to it redistributing its gravitational potential energy in the same manner, small unsecured objects are repelled over time, and light wind is always present. To protect from the possibility of damage to the incinerator and surrounding areas, the object was placed in Anomalous Storage.
Note: While heat is spread out, it does still affect the object as much as anything else within the affected area. It would be theoretically possible, if impractical, to melt it using extreme high heat via lasers or similar directed-energy devices. However, there’s no guarantee that would disable the anomaly, and if it applies to each particle of the thing, it could be difficult to collect. The last thing we need is vaporized anomalous material. - J.R. Morganna
Test 914-1827
Name: Junior Researcher Boneka
Date: 19/07/2021
Total Items: One GPS (Global Positioning System) unit
Input: One GPS unit
Setting: Fine
Output: One physically unchanged GPS unit. The voiceover settings list the names of various personnel employed at Facility 19-23. Selecting one will not only change the GPS's voice guide to match the voice of the corresponding personnel, but also affects many of the ways in which the GPS functions, sometimes in ways that are beyond the capabilities of a normal GPS. A partial list of how each voiceover affects the GPS's functions is included below.
Note: For the purpose of testing, the output has been installed in a standard car and relocated to another site with the appropriate size and facilities for driving in. The driving range is entirely enclosed within Site grounds, and D-Class personnel known to be cooperative have been selected to perform the following tests by driving the vehicle according to the GPS. - JR Boneka
Name | Function |
---|---|
Intern Beauvillier | Any and all directions inputted into the GPS will be modified in a way to get the vehicle the closest to French territory as possible. In the case of the current test, it redirected the driver in the direction of the French Ambassy in the U.S. It will also, during the trip, heavily praise French culture, gastronomy, and landscapes. While using the GPS, French becomes the only language available for all on-board systems including the device itself. It also allows the radio to receive French radio broadcasting. |
Junior Researcher Evangeline Perry | When this setting is selected, the GPS only allows the user to set routes for specific destinations, each one corresponding to the preferences of various personnel employed at Facility 19-23. The routes can't be edited, nor can new destinations be added. For example, J.R. Perry's destination is the nearest video game arcade, J.R. Boneka's destination is the nearest candy shop, and Dr. Veritas' destination is a route directly back to his office with the warning "Without the car." vocalized when beginning the route. |
Researcher Laskenta | The voiceover setting disables any navigational aid of the system with the exception of the displayed map. The voice guide will instead confront occupants with peeved notes about damaged parts of the car or poor quality of used roads. Most notably, the voice guide vocalised after a series of tests: "It's been three hours of proving grounds and deliberately damaged cars. There is only so much for me to say in a roundabout way." |
Dr. Nick Rose Ph.D | Technical terms used by the GPS have been replaced with medical vocabulary; for example, moving the vehicle forward will prompt for an anterior motion, and a small distance is referred to as a proximal distance. Distances are replaced with the metric equivalent. However, smaller distances, at a maximum of 100m, will be regarded as centimetres. When selecting destination waypoints, the GPS displayed a preferred destination of restaurants, liquor stores or dive-bars when picking destinations. Upon choosing a custom destination, the GPS will instead direct them to the aforementioned locations closest to the requested destination. |
Researcher MacLean | When this voiceover is active, the GPS will begin overheating and exhibit visual and auditory glitches. Whenever the car is stopped or its speed is changed by more than 24 kilometers per minute, the GPS will begin using an alternative route and add an additional stop. Stops are random but illicit in nature, and have included active crime scenes, condemned buildings, areas with known gang affiliations, and drug dens. |
Junior Researcher Abrams | All directions given by the GPS are sung to the tune of the song "Universe On Fire" composed by the band Gloryhammer. Furthermore, the car heater's temperature is set to a constant 30 degrees Celsius and is unable to be changed. |
WR Markham | The GPS's interface becomes mirrored left-to-right, and requests the driver to drive in reverse. The directions also prioritize paths that pass through city centres, and in particular city halls. This significantly lengthens the trips. |
Weapons Researcher Szymons | The GPS' language will be changed to a virtually incomprehensible mix of Polish and English. Sudden redirections and changes to the course occur often, and will direct the driver into the nearest barrier or wall, causing them to crash if the directions are followed. The GPS will sporadically change certain settings of the vehicle's onboard systems, like shifting cruise control speeds, or reformatting the dashboard's display if one is available. Upon mention of a destination, the GPS' voice will give a long, anecdotal speech about said destination which can continue even after reaching the inputted location. |
JR Boneka | The GPS adamantly refuses to calculate any routes and instead requests that the driver take public transport. |
Dr. Veritas | When this setting is selected, a driving route is calculated that loops back on itself, similar to a driving exam. Mistakes cause the GPS to deliver electric shocks to the user, including when the D-Class (who originated from the UK) attempted to drive on the left side. Comments include "read the signs, it says 40", "are you intoxicated?", "you're swerving around like a maniac", and "both hands on the wheel, two and ten o'clock!". When concluding the trip, the GPS told the D-Class to ''get back to work'' and short-circuited. |
Test 914-1828
Name: Junior Researcher Mochizuki
Date: 27/07/2021
Total Items: Five USB memory sticks containing the ISO image of the CD-ROM of "The Famires - Power-up Kit". The volume label recorded on the ISO image is [FAMIRES]. Also, all USB drives have a handwritten label attached, reading [Famires PK].
Note: This is a management simulation game of a "family restaurant" chain released in Japan in 1997, in which the player manages up to 15 stores. Up to two new train stations can be built on each map, with a population usually saturated within 30,000. Each store can employ up to 3 cooks and 6 waiters, and the candidates for staff in the game are 50 cooks and 98 waiters. Many of them have common names and portraits as Japanese, and there are also a few Chinese staff. Westerners do not appear, but there are a few cooks who have a history of training outside Japan. The dishes are divided into three categories: "Japanese", "Western", and "Chinese", and the menus that can be offered are limited depending on the type of store. - JR Mochizuki
Input: One Aforementioned USB drive
Setting: Rough
Output: A destroyed USB drive
Input: One Aforementioned USB drive
Setting: Coarse
Output: One identical USB drive with an unchanged label. There were no changes to the volume label or the installed game title, but several large bugs that did not exist in the original were identified, which has a significant negative impact on the functionality of the game.
Input: One Aforementioned USB drive
Setting: 1:1
Output: One USB drive containing the ISO image file of "The Convenience Store - Another World". The handwritten label has been changed to [Convini Another]. This is one of a series of management simulation games based on "convenience stores" released by the same company.
Input: One Aforementioned USB drive
Setting: Fine
Output: One USB memory containing the ISO image file of "The Famires 2". The handwritten label has been changed to [Famires 2]. The volume label has been changed to [FAMIRES2], the game has improved several system constraints and issues that were in the original, and has significantly increased menu types and employment staff variations. It was confirmed that the upper limit of the number of stores has increased to 20 and the total number of staff candidates has tripled for both cooks and waiters. These additional staffs includes a large number of Westerners. The video and UI scale for clearing the game have been changed to suit the monitor resolution in recent years, and an item related to the UI scale has been added in the options. In addition, the year of copyright display described in the play manual file was updated to 2021.
Note: This is pretty fun. It's a title that shouldn't exist, so I need to be careful about leaking it out, but can I keep it and play? - JR Mochizuki
Input: One Aforementioned USB drive
Settings: Very Fine
Output: One USB memory containing the ISO image file of "The Famires - World Edition". The handwritten label has been changed to [Famires Worldwide]. The volume label has been changed to [FAMIRES_WE], and the size of the ISO file is about 50 times larger than the original. The number of stores to be managed has increased significantly from 15 stores. An attempt to find the upper limit was made, but it could not be reached. People of all nationalities appeared as staff candidates, and it was concluded that it was impossible to identify all of them. On the other hand, in multiple scenarios that can be selected in the game, characters with the same name, portrait, and the contents of the biography were confirmed, so it is presumed that they are not simply randomly generated. Despite the fact that the conditions for clearing the scenarios are all operated by a global restaurant chain, the basic game system is not much different from the Fine output. It is necessary to manage the employment, transfer, and training of staff for each store. It was concluded that it is almost impossible for a normal person to clear the game because it is necessary to open new stores or renovate stores one by one on the map. In addition, the simulation system for customers, clerks, development in the map, etc. has hardly changed, and it is difficult to execute it with a general home computer because the scale is simply expanding.
Note: If you have a computer that can handle this and someone who has the head to manage the sheer number of stores and clear scenarios, you should use that ability for something else. - JR Mochizuki
Test 914-1829
Name: Junior Researcher Davidson
Date: 29/07/2021
Total Items: Three insulated bottles
Input: One insulated bottle
Setting: Coarse
Output: An insulated bottle with only one steel wall. The missing steel wall was positioned next to the bottle.
Input: One insulated bottle
Setting: 1:1
Output: Insulated bottle with the Foundation logo engraved on it.
Input: One insulated bottle
Setting: Fine
Output: An insulated bottle with 0°, 20°, and 100° buttons. After a button is pressed, the bottle cools or heats the liquid inside to one of the aforementioned temperatures. During testing, it was discovered that the bottle randomly switches between the Fahrenheit and Celsius scales.
Test 914-1830
Name: Dr. Maria Thompson and Intern Taylor Cornwall
Date: 30/07/2021
Total Items: One shirt with the logo of Goliath from Six Flags Magic Mountain, one hat with the logo of Ninja from Six Flags Magic Mountain
Note: I asked Taylor for something with a logo on it. Just going to show him how the machine functions. - Dr. Thompson
Input: One hat with the logo of Ninja from Six Flags Magic Mountain
Setting: 1:1
Output: One hat with the logo of Ninja from Six Flags St. Louis
Input: One shirt with the logo of Goliath from Six Flags Magic Mountain
Setting: Fine
Output: One shirt with the Thrasher logo but missing the letter A. When worn, people will be unable to write, speak, or hear the letter A.
Note: The shirt kept the same size and the letters seem to be repurposed from the Goliath logo. Not entirely sure why the logo is misspelled. - Dr. Thompson
Test 914-1831
Name: Researcher Laskenta
Date: 30/07/2021
Total Items: One oscilloscope, one paperback copy of Justin Kruger and David Dunning's Unskilled and unaware of it. How difficulties in recognizing one’s own incompetence lead to inflated self-assessments.
Input: Aforementioned items
Setting: Fine
Output: A single, circular sheet of music titled "Veritas' Ode to Disappointment" consisting out of fourteen rings of musical staves without any indication of beginning nor end, and one object resembling an oscilloscope. All knobs, levers, switches or similar inputs on the object, with the exception of the power switch and power cord, have been rendered unmovable or blocked. Turning the object on will result in different songs to be played and a matching oscillogram being displayed. It is currently hypothesised that the calmness of the song's genre is proportional to one or several traits of the subject that turned the object on. Such traits could include:
- Foresight, or lack thereof
- Amount of casualties or injuries responsible for, or inversely, the avoided amount
- Likeliness or unlikeliness of being an example for the Dunning-Kruger effect
- Professionalism, level of education, training, or lack thereof, in a certain field or in general
- The probability for a hypothetical event with an exaggerated outcome to happen because of the subject's influence
Due to the mostly immeasurable nature of the listed traits, the hypothesis remains unprovable.
Addendum: D-96807, who has musical experience, has been asked to play the music recorded on the first output on an instrument of their choice. The sheet has been positioned on a turntable for D-96807's convenience. Neither playing the rings consecutively nor playing a certain ring repeatedly has resulted in any anomalous event.
Test 914-1832
Name: Junior Researcher Mochizuki
Date: 15/08/2021
Total Items: Five original CD-ROM of the PS1 game software "Navit"
Note: A work released in Japan in 1998. In this game, the player becomes a local traffic controller, manages traffic lights, road signs, lane restrictions, speed limits, etc., and helps a specified number of vehicles reach their destination. - JR Mochizuki
Input: One aforementioned CD-ROM
Setting: Rough
Output: Shattered CD-ROM debris
Input: One aforementioned CD-ROM
Setting: Coarse
Output: Completely separated CD-ROM layers
Input: One aforementioned CD-ROM
Setting: 1:1
Output: CD-ROM of the game software "Traffic Confusion II" for Windows PC. (This is a work ported from a PC to PS1)
Input: One aforementioned CD-ROM
Setting: Fine
Output: A disc with "Navit 20XX" written on the label. It was found to be a game for the PS5. Such works are not for sale. There are improvements in graphical quality and an increase in the number of scenarios.
Input: One aforementioned CD-ROM
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One disc labelled "Navit -Future Traffic-". In addition to the title, an illustration of an object that seems to be an unknown vehicle is drawn on the label side. The size of the hole in the middle of the disc is still 15mm, but the diameter of the disc has been reduced to 10 cm. Read tests were conducted on all existing disk drives, but all failed to read and could not read the internal data.
Note: The "Future Traffic" simulation probably requires a huge amount of data. There seems to be no existing disk media standard that has enough capacity to accommodate it. I can't look at the files inside right now, but we could see an illustration of an unknown disk standard and an unknown vehicle. They are interesting. I look forward to developing disk drives that match this disc in the future. If we use items that contain digital data in the future, I think that if we want to analyze the files, we should use storage with a large capacity that can keep them stored even if the file size increases. - JR Mochizuki
Test 914-1833
Name: Junior Researcher Davidson
Date: 19/08/2021
Total Items: Three USB charger adapters with USB-C cables
Input: One USB charger adapter
Setting: Coarse
Output: A USB charger adapter with its circuit board and cable positioned next to it. Other than being removed from the adapter, the parts were not affected any further
Input: One USB charger adapter
Setting: 1:1
Output: A USB charger adapter with a Micro-USB Type-B cable
Input: One USB charger adapter
Setting: Fine
Output: A USB charger adapter that is anomalously able to charge any phone's battery from 0% to 100% exceptionally quickly. Changing a cable does not change the output's properties. When a D-Class equipped with an ammeter plugged the adapter into an outlet, it let out a electrical spark with a current of 0.02A resulting in severe shock to the D-Class. After the D-Class was removed from the testing room, another D-Class equipped with safety equipment was sent to recover the output. The second D-Class noted that the phone has already been charged despite being connected to the charger for only five minutes.
Note: Under normal circumstances, air has high electrical resistance. The only way the D-Class could have been shocked is that the spark must have been anomalous. - JR Davidson
Addendum: After being treated for electrical burns, the D-Class is expected to recover within two months.
Test 914-1834
Name: Junior Researcher Evangeline Perry
Date: 24/08/2021
Total Items: Three copies of the novel Breaking Dawn of the Twilight saga.
Input: The novel Breaking Dawn of the Twilight saga
Setting: 1:1
Output: The novel Breaking Dawn of the Twilight saga. Analysis reveals that the deuteragonist, Edward Cullen, is now a werewolf and the other deuteragonist, Jacob Black, is now a vampire. The protagonist, Isabella Swan, who would change into a vampire later in the book, changed into a werewolf instead. Other side characters who are either vampire or werewolf also transfigure into the opposite. Humans remain human.
Input: The novel Breaking Dawn of the Twilight saga
Setting: Fine
Output: A book, now titled: A Biological Examination of Vampires and Werewolves which describes the biological functions of vampires and werewolves, including an in-depth description of the physical traits of both, specializing in the musculature of the abdominal muscles and pectorals.
Input: The novel Breaking Dawn of the Twilight saga
Setting: Very Fine
Output: The novel Breaking Dawn of the Twilight saga. Upon reading the output, an anomalous effect takes hold on the subject, who will announce themselves as either being ''Team Jacob'' or ''Team Edward'', and will partake in physical violence defending this stance. The effect spreads to anybody who is accosted by affected individuals, resulting in violent altercations between large groups of people.
Note: Miss Perry, would you mind explaining to me why several D-Class are yelling at each other about supporting either ''Team Edward'' or ''Team Jacob.'', if you would? - Dr. Veritas
Note: Item incinerated at Veritas's request. - Security Chief Sedna
Test 914-1835
Name: Dr. Edwards
Date: 24/08/2021
Total Items: A Nerf-brand dart gun
Input: Dart gun
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A Nerf-brand dart gun which pressurizes air up to 15.0 bars, able to launch a dart at Mach 2. However, due to air resistance and other physical factors, the dart is completely shredded into an large amount of foam shreds upon firing, rendering the dart gun completely useless in environments other than nearly-complete vacuums. Object also appears to be able to anomalously teleport air into the dart gun's pressurization chamber. Air teleported into the pressurization chamber appears to be immune to the effects of a vacuum, which under normal circumstances would suck the air out. Incinerated.
Test 914-1836
Name: Junior Researcher Evangeline Perry
Date: 07/09/2021
Total Items: A coloring book, a copy of J.R. Evangeline Perry's most recent 914 test, a copy of the Gameboy color game Pokémon Red, a Samsung S20 phone, a bottle containing a mixture of 80% water and 20% alcohol
Input: A coloring book
Setting: 1:1
Output: A coloring book but all the drawings inside have been replaced with drawings of anthropomorphic animals.
Input: A copy of J.R. Evangeline Perry's most recent 914 test
Setting: 1:1
Output: A copy of J.R. Evangeline Perry's most recent 914 test. It is observed to be full of grammar mistakes and formatting errors. The date is written as 21/24/8.
Input: A copy of the Gameboy color game Pokémon Red
Setting: 1:1
Output: A copy of the Gameboy color game Pokémon Red. When starting up the game it seems unchanged until progressing. All the starters have been replaced by the Pokémon Voltorb that only know the move ''Explosion''. All the wild Pokémon are now also Voltorb with ''explosion'' as their only move. Leveling up the Voltorb will not make it learn new moves. The Voltorb are also unable to learn TM or HM moves, making the game unplayable.
Input: A Samsung S20 phone
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A iPhone 11 phone. When booting up the phone, it is observed that the phone has basic functions like calling and texting, but is mainly filled with games associated with microtransactions and gambling mechanics, as well as random advertisement pop-ups. No other apps can be installed, nor can existing apps be removed.
Input: A bottle containing a mixture of 80% water and 20% alcohol
Setting: Very Fine
Output: An unmarked bottle with an anomalous effect that causes people to perceive it as being labeled as their favorite beverage, but tasting their least favorite when they drink it.
Addendum: J.R. Perry has been put on janitorial duty for a week after deliberately placing the test outputs on Dr. Veritas' desk.
Test 914-1837
Name: Dr. Totomo
Date: 09/09/2021
Total Items: One polymer block, 1.5 m3, collected from AWCY? raid, deemed non-anomalous, donated for testing
Input: One polymer block
Setting: Fine
Output: A 3D-printed replica of a CZ Scorpion Evo S1 Pistol upper and lower receivers with 30-round 9mm magazine (unassembled), the letters "AWCY" etched onto the side of all three, the "Fire" selection on the safety is a question mark. Not operational. Remainder of unused polymer is presented as 0.02 mm diameter coiled filament, fit for universal 3D printer feeds.
Note: I’m not sure why SCP-914 did this, but knowing it, I’m sure the reason is cheeky. I’ll ask my colleagues what this might mean. - Dr. Totomo
Test 914-1838
Name: Researcher Thoreau
Date: 09/09/2021
Total Items: A copy of the particle-physics program OE-CAKE on a 1GB MicroSD card
Input: Above item
Setting: Very Fine
Output: Unchanged MicroSD card, but a new file called "914.oec" has been added to the "demos" folder. Upon opening, it shows a block of previously unknown material that transmutes particles' elements upon contact. Particles generated this way cannot be transmuted again.
Input | Output |
---|---|
Ignited Powder, currently exploding. | [IM], a material which creates large amounts of the "Mochi" material, often crashing games. |
Water | Fire; output dissipated. |
Heater, in Rigid form as opposed to Wall form. | Cooler, in Rigid form. |
Elastic | String. |
User, in Rigid form. | No change. |
Light | Dense. |
Yuki (Snow) | [MQG] |
Gas | Aerate. |
Viscous | Tensile. |
Novel | N/A, game crashed upon contact, leaving file corrupt. MicroSD card ejected and put into storage. |
Note: Strange, the file itself doesn't usually corrupt when the game crashes. Ah well, it was fun while it lasted. Transmutations were strangely predictable, though. -Researcher Thoreau
Test 914-1839
Name: Dr. Lucius Veritas
Date: 11/10/2021
Total Items: Two wristwatches (silver)
Input: One wristwatch
Setting: 1:1
Output: A device resembling a compass. Of note is that it is non-functional, as the needle does not include magnetic material.
Input: One wristwatch
Setting: Fine
Output: An intricate pendulum fabricated from the components of the watch, ''decorated'' with the parts and glass. The pendulum anomalously hovers, and swings from side to side every second. The pendulum can be manipulated by gently pushing it. Moved to storage.
Test 914-1840
Name: Researcher Laskenta
Date: 12/10/2021
Total Items: Three USB drives, each containing a copy of the puzzle browser game Bloxorz
Input: One aforementioned USB drive
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A USB drive, shaped like a lightning bolt, containing a self-containing infohazard which affects information transfer (see document 914-1840/A) containing itself by retroactively incorporating pauses, such as commas and occasionally brackets, so that sectional word counts, representing Bloxorz' passcodes, are reached. Intrainformationally, the text inside brackets, such as seen in the previous infohazardous sentence above, represents one holistic pause and is not affected hereby. Digits are disregarded by the infohazard entirely. This output description represents the following passcodes: 300590 665321 499707
Input: One aforementioned USB drive
Setting: Fine
Output: The same drive, containing a puzzle game named Bloyorw. Just as in the input, an orthotope is moved through levels by rotating it each time a button corresponding to a direction in the level is pressed towards a certain hole in the ground, which is to be reached in an upright permutation. However, the 2D platform on which the 3D cuboid is situated has been replaced with a 3D platform on which a 4D hyperrectangle resides.
Input: One aforementioned USB drive
Setting: 1:1
Output: The input, rotated to stand upright on its USB port.
Input: Previous output, in the same permutation
Setting: 1:1
Output: The input, rotated to lay on one of the narrower sides.
Input: Previous output, in the same permutation
Setting: 1:1
Output: The input, cleanly cut into two pieces. The output is hypothesised to represent the "cut-button" mechanic from Bloxorz, however, the pieces do not anomalously merge when connected to each other.
Test 914-1841
Name: Intern François Beauvillier
Date: 12/10/2021
Total items: One USB Drive containing the flash game Fancypants Adventure 2 in .swf format, two USB Drives containing the flash game Cat Mario in .swf format.
Input: A USB drive containing the flash game Cat Mario in .swf format, a game parody of the Super Mario Bros. game with crude graphics and absurd mechanics, making it both extremely difficult to play, and very unfair.
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A USB drive containing a .swf file whose name resembles inconsistent and random keystrokes. Running the file by double-clicking seems impossible, as every time the cursor reaches a 10 pixel radius around the "Execute" button, a sprite of an enemy in the flash game Cat Mario will appear from the edge of the screen, and move towards the cursor at ludicrous speed. When it reaches the cursor, the words "Game Over" will blink on the screen, and the computer will suddenly shut down. Running the file via command line interface also revealed to be impossible, as any attempt to type the name of the file will cause a complete renaming of it in a completely random way on each keystroke.
Input: A USB drive containing the flash game Fancypants Adventure 2 in .swf, a platformer game known for its style and gameplay revolving about hand-drawn figures and designs.
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A drawn USB drive. It appears to be, whichever observation method is used, to be a hand-made line drawing of an USB drive. It can be grabbed and used, despite its apparent transparency and lack of components or third spatial dimension. When plugged into a device, the device itself will also appear hand-drawn, despite being also usable and functionally unchanged. Although it is plugged in, the drive will be inaccessible by any file exploration program, thus it is not known if it still contains the original game or not.
Note: Grabbing and manipulating purely 2D objects with my 3 dimensional hands is unsettling at best. - Intern Beauvillier
Input: A USB drive containing the flash game Cat Mario in .swf format, a game parody of the Super Mario Bros. game with crude graphics and absurd mechanics, making it both extremely difficult to play, and very unfair.
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A [EXPLETIVE DELETED] visibly unchanged [EXPLETIVE DELETED] USB drive containing the [EXPLETIVE DELETED] Cat Mario game in [EXPLETIVE DELETED] .swf format. [EXPLETIVE DELETED] plugging and running the [EXPLETIVE DELETED] game causes the [EXPLETIVE DELETED] user to be [EXPLETIVE DELETED] unable to refrain from using [EXPLETIVE DELETED] expletives extremely [EXPLETIVE DELETED] frequently, should it [EXPLETIVE DELETED] be spoken, or [EXPLETIVE DELETED] written. The [EXPLETIVE DELETED] effect lasts around three [EXPLETIVE DELETED] hours, or the average [EXPLETIVE DELETED] time for the [EXPLETIVE DELETED] completion of the five first [EXPLETIVE DELETED] levels of Cat Mario.
Note: [EXPLETIVE DELETED] this. - Intern François [EXPLETIVE DELETED] Beauvillier
Test 914-1842
Name: Junior Researcher Boneka
Date: 12/10/2021
Total Items: One USB drive containing a copy of the video game QWOP in .swf format
Note: This is a simple but notoriously difficult Flash game intended for two players. Both players have to control a single character, with one player using the Q and W keys to maneuver its thighs, while the other uses O and P to maneuver its calves. The goal is to travel 100m without falling over. - JR Boneka
Input: One USB drive containing a copy of the video game QWOP in .swf format
Setting: Fine
Output: One USB drive containing a modified version of the input titled Getting Over QWOP with Bennett Foddy. Instead of a flat 100m track like in the original game, the map resembles that found in the video game Getting Over It with Bennett Foddy, with a variety of tall, difficult-to-navigate terrains and obstacles. In addition, in order to vault itself over steep obstacles, the player character is given a sledgehammer, which is controlled in tandem by both players using the X and M keys respectively, in addition to the original QWOP keys. Due to the obstacle-riddled and long-winded nature of the terrain, the sensitive controls, and the fact that falling over still results in a complete game over, the game is thought to be extremely difficult, if not impossible to complete.
Note: Interestingly enough, QWOP and Getting Over It are both games made by Bennett Foddy. I'm sure he'd be very pleased to know of the existence of this monstrosity, the sadist that he is. - JR Boneka
Test 914-1843
Name: Intern Scott
Date: 12/10/2021
Total Items: Two USB flash drives containing the source code of the game The World's Hardest Game
Note: Alright, so this game involves moving around a cube around various obstacles to reach the end of the level. Some of them move, some of them stay stationary. There around around 20 levels to complete. - Intern Scott
Input: One flash drive
Setting: 1:1
Output: One flash drive containing the source code of the game The World's Easiest Game
Note: Each level was unchanged with the exception being all obstacles were removed. D-Class subject reported feeling disappointed, due to the lack of challenge involved. - Intern Scott
Input: One flash drive
Setting: Fine
Output: One flash drive containing the source code of the game The Universe's Hardest Game.
Note: Alongside navigating obstacles using the arrow keys, the player must solve mathematical problems and enter the answer through the keypad as well as recite a random book specified by the game word for word. The game will also change language upon every death. D-Class subject failed to clear the first level due to the amount of multitasking needed and was subsequently removed after attempting to destroy the test machine used. - Intern Scott
Note: Beating Dark Souls with a steering wheel is probably easier than this. Both flash drives incinerated, lest we get another person with anger issues. - Intern Scott
Test 914-1844
Name: Dr. Lucius Veritas
Date: 12/10/2021
Total Items: A flash drive containing the Flash game The Last Stand. This game has the objective of repelling zombies from the player's base every night by shooting them before they reach the barrier. After each battle (which increase in difficulty) there is an opportunity to find other survivors or repair the base, with resources having to be divided between those two.
Input: A flash drive containing the Flash game The Last Stand
Setting: Fine
Output: A flash drive containing a game called: ''The Last Straw''. Gameplay is largely similar, but the main character is replaced by a depiction of Dr. Veritas, and instead of a firearm, he seems to be carrying a large tubular device that is firing a security manual at running Foundation employees. After each ''battle'', the player can choose to repair damage to the building or find ''better employees''.
Addendum: In one of the 23 games tested, a researcher with the nameplate ''Darby'' appeared, seemingly a unique enemy type. The depiction of Veritas in-game produced a 12-gauge shotgun and ''gibbed'' the model in an excessively more violent way.
Test 914-1845
Name: Junior Researcher Andrew
Date: 12/10/2021
Total Items: Three unused Remington-brand electric razors.
Input: One electric razor
Setting: 1:1
Output: One small electric carver knife with a 3cm blade
Input: One electric razor
Setting: Fine
Output: One physically unaltered Remington brand electric razor with seemingly infinite battery life and the inability to cut any form of hair.
Input: One electric razor
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One electric razor measuring 20cm in length without its protective plastic shell, presumably turning into the extra length present on the razor. When the razor is used it instantaneously shaves all hair on the person using it. Approximately two hours after using the razor, the subject will start to grow 30cm long strands of hair all over their body within ten minutes. The hair has not yet been able to be cut by any form of razor except for the output.
Note: It looks like there is considerable strain on the hair follicles in this process; along with mild malnutrition, all of D-23994's hair fell out within 30 minutes, including eyelashes and eyebrows. The only parts unaffected are hairs present in the ears and nose. Placed in anomalous storage. You might ask why removing all hair from a person would ever be a necessity, and I'll answer you with the amount of years I worked for the Foundation. I've seen weirder things. - Veritas
Test 914-1846
Name: Junior Researcher Shion
Date: 13/10/2021
Total Items: One 98% pure 5g pentacontane cube (chemical formula C50H102), one plastic container.
Note: Previous tests have shown that the "Coarse" setting is not only able to break down objects into their component materials, but can also disassemble compounds on a chemical level into their component elements. Due to the results of test 914-1817, the test chamber will be hermetically sealed and all aeration vents will be closed during output retrieval. As a precaution against SCP-914 disassembling the elements into dangerous particulates, testing will cease if the carbon-hydrogen bonds in the input are ever broken, such that the "focus" of disassembly and sorting remains on the different types of elements bonded to one another and not on the individual atoms - JR Shion
Input: One 98% pure 5g pentacontane cube within the plastic container
Setting: Coarse
Output: One 4.9g pentacontane cube, 5 smaller cubes determined to contain impurities from the original input. One unchanged plastic container.
Input: One 4.9g purified pentacontane cube from previous test within the outputted plastic container
Setting: Coarse
Output: One unchanged 4.9g purified pentacontane cube, one plastic cube. Plastic output incinerated.
Input: Pentacontane output from previous test
Setting: Coarse
Output: A puddle of water and one unchanged 4.9g pentacontane cube. The air in the output booth was noted to be abnormally dry upon opening.
Dehumidifiers have been employed to reduce humidity in the testing chamber. Hopefully, by removing other materials from the intake booth, 914 will only have the pentacontane to work with. - JR Shion
Input: Pentacontane output from previous test
Setting: Coarse
Output: Air rushed into the output booth as if in response to a vacuum. Booth contained one unchanged 4.9g pentacontane cube, in addition to one anomalously solidified cube of N2 at room temperature, as well as one anomalously solidified cube of O2 at room temperature. SCP-914 was undamaged.
Note: It is not remotely practical to remove all of the air from the testing chamber or the intake booth alone. Thus, this test will be repeated until a notable output is received or it seems pointless to continue. The air pressure in the testing chamber has been lowered to reduce the chances of damage incurred via pressure wave. - JR Shion
[Tests 5-43 expunged for brevity. Outputs included but were not limited to: solid models of an O2 and N2 molecule composed of their respective elements, liquid O2 and N2 stored in cups composed of their anomalously solid counterparts, and a thin "panel" of pentacontane separating one half of the booth containing only O2 gas and the opposite half containing only N2 gas.]
Input: Pentacontane output from previous test
Setting: Coarse
Output: One smaller, brownish solid cube. Preliminary tests indicate the cube is composed of solid buckminsterfullerene, C60 (a molecule with a cage-like structure composed of numerous fused carbon rings), each molecule of buckminsterfullerene containing numerous molecules of H2 under high pressure.
Note: It worked! It seems like removing possible alternative output options and relying on 914's inherent randomness eventually paid off. - JR Shion
Addendum: The cube spontaneously combusted during testing, preventing detailed analysis from being made. Remaining residue contained traces of pentacontane, despite formation of such a compound via combustion being impossible. Remains incinerated.
Test 914-1847
Name: Intern Hammerstrom
Date: 18/10/2021
Total Items: Three vinyl records of various songs dated between 1920 and 1940, one record player.
Note: It took me fifteen minutes to find the damn machine, and I was carrying this thing around the whole time. What's a guy gotta do to get a map around here? -Intern Hammerstrom
Note: Try following the signs or paying attention at the orientation. This isn't a strip mall, Hammerstrom. - Veritas
Input: One vinyl record, label illegible.
Setting: Rough
Output: A cube of plastic equal to the volume .
Input: One vinyl record containing the song It Looks Like Rain in Cherry Blossom Lane, label heavily worn.
Setting: 1:1
Output: One vinyl record containing the song Lullaby of the Leaves, label heavily worn.
Input: One vinyl record containing the song Heartaches.
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One vinyl playing the instrumental aforementioned song at 80% speed. One vinyl containing both the Al Bowlly version and Sieger Ellis versions of Heartaches One vinyl containing several copies of the song Heartaches A single disc storing multiple versions of Heartach A vinyl copy of Aching Hea A vinyl copy o A vinyl c copy Heartaches vinyl one a b wjzom dpqz p a vniyl poyc fo achearte A vinyl afhg qp ndrabarcbv ghaen a mznvbbwaa neo nymal ohpe ho an instrumental zd or kydr s nietngh memods jw Akl Cwlzckme jahkbjlwa The most advisable course of action is for rsaermkcl tlloarrina acheknlacbajskheart hhhbvvcd a vinyl a vinyl a vinyl a vinyl a vinyl a vinyl a vinyl a vinyl b jlker c bnmas i awpsh vinly insinsinsinstrutrumentttttttaallI vinyl verityln veritanyl veritas vynli vynitas v
Note: We found Intern Hammerstrom on the floor of 914's room with a record player. The record itself was broken. Apparently, the intern fell on it. CAT scan shows major plaque buildup in his brain, he's not coming back… ever. Out of curiousity, what happened to the records? Were they incinerated? - Medical Officer Stuart
Note: Yeah, they incinerated the records. Guess it's just a burning memory. In all seriousness, I think that might be the fastest casualty we've had in a long time. - Researcher Ishkibon
Test 914-1848
Name: Junior Researcher Allen
Date: 18/10/2021
Total Items: Four battery-powered two-way radio transceivers
Input: One radio
Setting: Rough
Output: One nonfunctional radio that has been seemingly smashed and melted.
Input: One radio
Setting: Coarse
Output: An assortment of radio components sorted from largest to smallest.
Input: One radio
Setting: 1:1
Output: One graphing calculator with increased battery life due to larger battery space. Due to a lack of buttons, equations can only be inputted through the use of a switch, similar to one of the aforementioned radios. Input equations also take several seconds to complete, and are incorrect 15% of the time, rendering the output unreliable.
Input: One radio
Setting: Fine
Output: One digital GPS. Instead of displaying locations on Earth, it displays locations from a random planet or moon orbiting our sun. So far Earth has not been displayed, though the Earth's moon is observable. There are several inconsistencies with Foundation information, most notably that there are deep gashes and massive craters on the surface of the moon. The object drained its battery after 5 hours of usage, with no way of recharging discovered yet.
Test 914-1849
Name: Researcher Laskenta
Date: 23/10/2021
Total Items: Three printed copies of test log 914-1688
Input: One of the aforementioned copies
Setting: Fine
Output: One origami model resembling [DATA LOST].
Input: One of the aforementioned copies
Setting: Fine
Output: One scientific paper regarding the chemistry of nylon 66 and one detailed but inaccurate description about logic gates. The only correct explanation in the latter text regards NAND gates.
Note: [DATA LOST]
Input: One of the aforementioned copies
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A perpetually changing object, resembling a random item which stores the entire information about test 914-1688 at any given time. Due to this effect, any knowledge, record, or other direct information about test 914-1688, other than its identification, has been lost, no new memory can be formed, and no copies of the information can be created. Researcher Laskenta and D-47804 have been found in an discombobulated state in Research Cell 109-B after the security system detected an unauthorised use of SCP-914, but have not suffered from any impairment to their health since then.
Addendum: The CCTV footage of Anomalous Storage - Shelf J2, starting at 19/08/2020 11:29 local time - has been noted be absent. It is currently hypothesised that the output of test 914-1688 has been stored within the viewing range of the camera. As no description about the output and the reason for its containment can currently be obtained, Director of Containment Dr. Norwood ordered Shelf J2 to be isolated, both in order to prevent the anomaly from causing accidents and to subsequently relocate the output.
Test 914-1850
Name: Junior Researcher Davidson
Date: 24/10/2021
Total Items: Three plastic pumpkins, one candle with a vanilla scent, one speaker
Input: One plastic pumpkin
Setting: Coarse
Output: Two halves of a plastic pumpkin. The stem of the pumpkin was positioned between the two halves.
Input: One plastic pumpkin with a candle inside
Setting: Fine
Output: A plastic pumpkin with a candle inside that is able to change its scent through unknown means. Trying to smell the candle causes the scent to change to whatever the person smelling it considers to be the worst smell.
Input: One plastic pumpkin with a speaker inside
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A plastic pumpkin with a speaker inside with cognitohazardous properties. The cognitohazardous properties make the person listening to songs feel feelings of happiness, euphoria and satisfaction. Prolonged exposure to the audio produced by the speaker causes people in a 5m radius to experience headaches, dizziness, and lightheadedness. During testing, it was discovered that if the speaker is removed from inside the pumpkin, the speaker loses its anomalous properties and functions as a normal speaker until it is returned inside the pumpkin. The pumpkin itself was discovered to induce feelings of fear, anxiety and nervousness. Output incinerated.
Test 914-1851
Name: Junior Researcher Bianchi
Date: 24/10/2021
Total Items: Three homemade puppets resembling ghosts, with a simple construction of a white cloth, a head filled with cotton balls held together by string, and black marker was used to make eyes.
Input: One ghost puppet
Setting: 1:1
Output: The puppet was reconstructed to resemble a mummy. This was partially successful, as the doll does not have adequate materials to give the doll filled limbs, giving it a flat look. There was also not enough extra cloth to enwrap the entire doll, so a combination of cloth and string was used.
Input: One ghost puppet
Setting: Fine
Output: One ghost puppet. The output hovers at roughly 170 cm above the ground, and can be manipulated by pushing it, similar to a helium balloon.
Input: One ghost puppet
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One ghost puppet. Puppet immediately flew out of the room by passing through a ventilation grate without colliding with it. It tried ambushing Dr. Veritas in a nearby hallways while he was moving to his office, but was only capable of headbutting him, which did no damage. The puppet seemed incapable of phasing through other material after its initial escape, so it was caught inside a coffee cup and a clipboard before rehousing it in a glass jar after Dr. Veritas reached his office. Placed in anomalous storage.
Test 914-1852
Name: Junior Researcher Allen
Date: 25/10/2021
Total Items: Four standard surgical face masks
Input: One mask
Setting: Rough
Output: One pile of thin fabric strips that appear to have been put through a paper shredder.
Input: One mask
Setting: Coarse
Output: Two pieces of string and several 3x3cm squares of fabric.
Input: One mask
Setting: 1:1
Output: One cyan handkerchief with the Foundation logo embroidered onto it.
Input: One mask
Setting: Fine
Output: One identical face mask that prevents all harmful substances from passing through anomalously alters any gas into an unknown substance when passing through. During testing, the mask constricted tightly around the face of D-87569, though he reported no discomfort. D-87569 showed strong improvements in all physical tests, though he began coughing shortly afterward. Several minutes after this, D-87569 reported chest pain and difficulty breathing, then promptly collapsed and began desperately tearing the mask off his face, destroying it. D-class terminated by J.R. Allen after D-87569 began coughing up large amounts of blood and an unknown liquid that ignited upon contact with air. An autopsy revealed that D-87569’s lungs had received 3rd degree burns. During the autopsy, all of the blood in D-87569’s body combusted in a fashion similar to thermite, rendering further research impossible.
Test 914-1853
Name: Junior Researcher Andrew
Date: 26/10/2021
Total Items: One Walther P99 Pistol, three loaded 16 round 9mm magazines
Input: One 9mm magazine
Setting: 1:1
Output: One loaded 5.56 magazine with a capacity of 8 rounds. The magazine is of normal construction based on 5.56 magazines sold today.
Input: One 9mm magazine
Setting: 1:1
Output: One loaded .50 AE magazine with a capacity of 16 rounds. No similar magazine has been identified at the time of writing. Testing revealed that all of the cartridges have insufficient amounts of gunpowder to be properly used. The spring used for pushing the cartridges out of the magazine is also too weak to function correctly.
Input: One 9mm magazine
Setting: Fine
Output: One physically unaltered loaded 9mm magazine. When fired, the bullet will separate into five parts and explode upon impact with any surface. Upon close inspection, it has been reported that a small amount of gunpowder has been placed into the cavities of the five parts. Because a small amount of the gunpowder was moved from the casing to the bullet itself, the projectile has lost velocity.
Note: Upon firing the seventh cartridge it prematurely exploded before hitting the intended target. Item deemed too dangerous to continue testing. - Junior Researcher Andrew
Input: One Walther P99 Pistol
Setting: Fine
Output: One Ruger Security-9 pistol. When looking down the iron sites, the subject holding it will have an image materialize in their mind. The image has shown a common theme between all test subjects, namely being persons right before their death, Presumably by gunshot. All of the images so far have also been in the first-person view of the person holding the pistol.
Test 914-1854
Name: Junior Researcher Allen
Date: 09/11/2021
Total Items: Four empty plastic water bottles
Input: One bottle
Setting: Rough
Output: One crushed plastic bottle.
Input: One bottle
Setting: Coarse
Output: A line of components belonging to the bottle, including the cap, tamper ring, and the base bottle, arranged in a cross-section. The label is flattened out underneath the components.
Input: One bottle
Setting: 1:1
Output: One bottle containing a small plastic ship floating in what appears to be liquid oxygen. After a few seconds of the output door opening, the bottle exploded, but due to the low mass of the material, no damage was done. D-class treated for minor frostbite after being exposed to liquid oxygen particles.
Input: One bottle
Setting: Fine
Output: One physically unaltered bottle. When someone picks up the bottle, they will immediately become unable to use any object composed of materials that were obtained through processes deemed unhealthy for the planet. They will also attempt to convince others to grab the bottle, eventually resorting to physically forcing others to touch the bottle. Effects ceased after the object was incinerated.
Note: I was stuck in the test chamber for three hours with that D-Class before someone found us. I couldn’t open the doors or use the radio as those both have material that required mining to obtain, and in turn caused pollution. -J.R. Allen
Test 914-1855
Name: Researcher Joseph Lassel
Date: 10/11/2021
Total Items: One Motorola g100 phone
Input: One phone
Setting: Very Fine
Output: Appeared identical, with the exception of brand markings being removed. When Researcher Lassel attempted to use the phone, it caused him to spontaneously disappear. Lassel reappeared in Facility 23 on 20/12/2021. A journal he was carrying appeared to document his time during his disappearance. The phone was found in one of his pockets, displaying a message saying; 'Thank you for visiting! Devices like this tore us apart.' Analysis of the phone did not indicate any anomalous traits.
Addendum: The following logs were recovered from Lassel's aforementioned journal, and have been transcribed here verbatim.
I know there have been other instances of 914's outputs transporting people to different places, but this was unexpected. Upon interacting with the phone, a flash of blue light shrouded me, and I found myself in this place. I'm in a valley of soft grass and what looks like pine trees, surrounded by white mountains. I always carry a diary with me so I guess I'll document my experience here.
I've found usages out of the phone. When I booted it up, it showed me what plants were safe to consume through its camera, so malnutrition won't be a problem. Most of it does not taste like much but considering I'm fighting for survival as of now, it does not matter I suppose. I feel lighter here, so wherever I am, the gravity is not as strong as Earth's. When I looked up at the sky, I noticed that the sun was brighter and had a slight blue coloration. While I'm not experienced in astronomy, a star that came to mind was Sirius. That star has a mass over twice the sun's, and thus glows blue with its heat. Despite that, it is not hot. Quite the opposite; it cannot be more than 15 degrees Celsius. I have not seen or heard any animals. It is eerily quiet.
I've been walking aimlessly throughout this place for almost three days. The environment has not changed; still mountainous and cold. I say days, but the day-night cycle here is 38 hours, meaning I get roughly 19 hours of daytime, which is the only time I move. During the night, I try to bunk into places that are covered, such as clusters of trees and bushes. It has been hard to find those however, as it looks like I've entered the high-elevation tundra area of this place. The low gravity has made it both bizarre and pleasant walking through this place. Walking uphill is not as strenuous.
This marks my first week here. I have not devised a plan to get back home. I've tried using the phone since that is what took me here in the first place, but to no avail. I wonder if anyone back at the Foundation has attempted to bring me back somehow. I don't know how they would go about that, but surely they must have tried.
I actually came across some other beings. While I was sitting by a lake, I was approached by five beings who resembled humans, except they had silvery skin, were taller, and didn't look like they had very robust physiques. They also wore suits that covered most of their bodies, with the exception of the forearms and head. They were armed with what looked like assault rifles, although did not seem as if they were trying to hurt me. They only seemed confused, and began to speak with one another through some bizarre verbals.
I figured it was worth trying to talk with them in my language, which (as I expected) did not do much. However, they began to do hand gestures for me to come with them. I don't know if I properly understood them, but they seemed to signify that my current situation was unsafe. So after some debate, I tagged along.
I really hope that they won't
Its been some time since I wrote in here. I'm still with the beings and to my surprise, they have been very accommodating. While we still cannot communicate properly, I can understand them sort of through their expressions. We've been hiking about the mountains for the past few days, and I suppose I did the right thing for my first week here. We only move during the day, and we bunk in places at night. I have yet to determine why they do this, but clearly they are very distressed about something.
As for their side, I think they're better at understanding me than I am understanding them. Granted I have not spoken much, but I they seem to be able to understand basic phrases and words like 'please' and 'thank you.' Maybe it's just body language though. I've also noticed that they also use devices like the one that brought me here. I think they've attempted to use it to translate my words into whatever their language is.
This marks my third week in this place.
Things have escalated recently. It was during the nighttime when I awoke to the sounds of screeches. Upon waking up, I noticed we were surrounded by several other beings resembling my companions, except they were wearing different suits. They gave off the indication that they were hostile, as they assaulted my companions. One of my companions raised their gun, and began firing at the crowd. We all assembled amidst the chaos, and began to run off in the other direction, with my companions firing back at the crowd.
I do not know what they wanted with us, but they clearly wanted something bad with us. I suspect that they might be what my companions are afraid of.
I've started picking up more pieces of what is going on in the world I'm in. From our continuous attempts at trying to make some sense of each other's languages, and them trying to show me concepts through pictograms, I've started to paint a picture. I believe that this world is in some form of anarchy, and authority is almost non-existent. I also speculate that the situations also involves the devices, like the one that brought me here. Perhaps some conflict that has divided everyone.
My companions finally managed to figure out some textual translation, through the phone. I don't know how they did it, but through tangible English language, they wrote up on their devices everything I needed to know.
It turns out I was right. They are a member of a former civilization, which was near utopia status. However, eventually members began to rebel against the single cooperation who specialized in technology, as a result of consumer fraud. This led to the cooperation liquidating, and splitting off into several independent companies. Apparently, the planet is home to about 5 billion individuals, who all used to indulge in technological achievements. However, when the independent companies started up, people began to get into conflicts about whatever company others bought from.
Leadership destabilized as a result of insurrection, since the government attempted to evade the chaos, claiming it was nothing more than kerfuffles of the public. Eventually, everything turned into anarchy, and slowly became what this world is today. Groups living on their own attempting to survive without the comforts they once had.
Well, that is a bizarre story.
I've been here for almost 4 I've lost count. I'm really starting to loose my sanity now. I've tried to use my knowledge of the Foundation to try and figure out a way that they could help me out, if I cannot do it. I don't even know where they would start. I cannot give up hope. However, sometimes I wonder if refusing to let go is pointless instinct. I don't I must seek keep- I don't know anymore. I feel as if-
This is the final entry in the journal. Later interviews with Lassel revealed that the phone produced a ring tone during his sleep, and presumably transported him back to Facility 23.
Note: Lassel was treated for mild malnutrition and received psychological evaluation. They are expected to make a full recovery in time. - Veritas
Test 914-1856
Name: Junior Researcher Shion
Date: 13/11/2021
Total Items: 1L 0.5M copper(II) sulfate solution, 1L 0.5M acetic acid solution, 1L 0.5M cobalt(II) chloride solution, 1L 0.5M nitrous acid solution, four plastic containers
Note: I will be testing SCP-914's ability to separate compounds that dissociate in solution or form different compounds in solution, such as cobalt(II) chloride, which forms a hydrate with water. - JR Shion
Input: One plastic container containing 1L 0.5M copper(II) sulfate
Setting: Coarse
Output: 79.8 grams of a powder later identified to be copper sulfate, one plastic container containing pure water.
Input: One plastic container containing 1L 0.5M acetic acid, pH 2.52
Setting: Coarse
Output: 30 grams of a powder later identified to be acetic acid, one plastic container containing pure water, pH 7.
Input: One plastic container containing 1L 0.5M cobalt(II) chloride solution. Solution was red after preparation, indicating some cobalt(II) hexahydrate had formed via reaction with water.
Setting: Coarse
Output: 71 grams of a powder later identified to be pure anhydrous cobalt(II) chloride, one plastic container containing pure water.
Note: This gives me an idea. I will be repeating this test with nitrous acid, a compound currently known only to exist in solution, to see if SCP-914 can isolate it in pure form. - JR Shion
Input: One plastic container containing 1L 0.5M nitrous acid
Setting: Coarse
Output: One plastic container containing pure water, one dark blue solid cube. Upon the retrieving D-class touching the cube, it proceeded to "burst," and sprayed its contents over the D-class at high pressure. SCP-914 was undamaged, and the D-class was treated for mild acid burns and made a full recovery within a week. Residue on the D-class uniform confirmed to be 0.5M nitrous acid solution.
Addendum: The plastic container, which was retrieved first and determined to contain pure water, was found to be empty after the cube ruptured. Security footage shows the water abruptly vanishing from the container the instant the cube was touched.
Test 914-1857
Name: Dr. N Rose
Date: 16/11/2021
Total Items: Four standard-issue stethoscopes
Input: One of the aforementioned stethoscopes
Setting: 1:1
Output: An identical stethoscope. When the stethoscope is used on an individual, it can no longer capture the audio of breathing or heartbeat. Instead, the stethoscope is capable of capturing the audio of blood cell formation and bone movement when placed against synovial joints.
Input: One of the aforementioned stethoscopes
Setting: Fine
Output: An identical stethoscope. When used in a medical fashion, the stethoscope does not function. However, placing the bell of the stethoscope against solid matter allows the listener to hear into the adjacent room. This effect extends into sound-proof chambers. No other rooms, unless directly connected to the adjacent, will be heard.
Input: One of the aforementioned stethoscopes
Setting: Fine
Output: An identical stethoscope. When the stethoscope is stretched, it anomalously continues to do so. The elastic effect is extremely easy to perform, taking little force to stretch the output. The maximum elasticity is, as of this test, unknown, and reverts to its regular length on its own over varying periods of time, depending on the stretched length. When used, the stethoscope acts as expected. When stretched, however, the stethoscope’s audiological range is increased, to the extent of hearing the full bodily functions of the patient’ the sound of which is extremely loud and renders the listener incapable of identifying isolated functions. Use by a nurse during testing resulted in burst eardrums and temporary deafness.
Note: I swear I could hear the stethoscope from the safety booth. If there is a use for this, I’m open to suggestions, even if it isn’t for a medical capacity. I do, however, wish to test the decibel rating on this thing, just so we know where it is safe if we do stretch it. - Dr. Rose
Input: One of the aforementioned stethoscopes
Setting: Fine
Output: An identical stethoscope. Using the stethoscope results in the patient being capable of hearing the listener’s thoughts. Thorough testing has revealed the bell is the receiver and the headset as the transmitters for this effect. Essentially, the roles of the listener and patient are reversed. The accuracy of the effect also depends on the kind of thought; should the patient think of a word or phrase, the listener will hear said word/phrase in the voice of the patient. Or should the patient think of a scene, the listener will hear sounds related to the scene itself, such as laughter from a cinema or police sirens from a car crash. Further testing may be required, pending approval.
Test 914-1858
Name: Junior Researcher Faris
Date: 28/11/2021
Total Items: Two modern vinyl record players
Input: One vinyl record player
Setting: Fine
Output: One LaserDisc player. LEDs from the device have been used to create the laser diode. Output only able to play back audio from any media inserted.
Input: One vinyl record player
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One identical vinyl record player. Playback of any media at first appears identical to the original player, but further analysis of the audio produced showed subtle additions and alterations. Playing the recorded audio backward revealed hidden messages detailing the orders and agenda of various private, concealed, or otherwise unknown organisations, both real and fictional. The SCP Foundation was also included when Queen's "Fat Bottomed Girls" single was played. Specific messages change depending on the provided record.
Addendum: If listened to directly from the player, the songs influence the listener to act on their hidden orders. D-746294 was subdued and administered amnestics after violently smashing the player before guards could intervene, screaming while doing so that "The lizard men want their secrets kept hidden." Remains incinerated.
Note: Listening to the various ridiculous satanic messages was way more fun before it started to sound above my clearance level. I'll be submitting a report of all discovered messages to Veritas directly before receiving amnestics. It's probably all nonsense, but I'd rather be safe than sorry around here. - J.R. Faris
Test 914-1859
Name: Junior Researcher Joseph Carpenter
Date: 23/12/2021
Total Items: Four #2 Dixon Ticonderoga-brand pencils
Input: One #2 Dixon Ticonderoga-brand pencil
Setting: Coarse
Output: One 19cm rod of graphite, one 19cm hexagonal wooden stick, one green aluminum ferrule, a small pool of yellow paint, and one small cylindrical piece of pink rubber.
Input: One #2 Dixon Ticonderoga-brand pencil
Setting: 1:1
Output: One Amazon Basics #2 pencil.
Input: One #2 Dixon Ticonderoga-brand pencil
Setting: Fine
Output: The pencil appears unaltered, but was found to be incredibly resistant to bending and snapping. The lifespan of both the eraser and graphite seems to have improved significantly. The wooden body of the pencil was also resistant to dent marks, scratches, and chipping. However this new durability includes the eraser, making it extremely tough to erase any writing. The most it does is just smear the graphite across the writing surface. The “#2” has been replaced by a “#1” and the “soft” inscription is missing.
Input: One #2 Dixon Ticonderoga-brand pencil
Setting: Very Fine
Output: Similar to the input, except now has mechanical features similar to a ballpoint pen. Clicking the eraser will unveil the graphite point. All original inscriptions on the pencil are missing. Upon being given a notebook and gripping the pencil, D-55484 wrote every page, word for word, of Shakespeare's "Macbeth". While writing, no breaks were taken, and they seemed to have been in a trance-like state. After finishing, they could not recall the passing of time. When only a single piece of paper was given to them, they began writing the first page of William Golding's "Lord of the Flies" and became hostile after running out of room. A second empty notebook was given to let them finish. D-55484 reported painful cramping and aching of their writing hand after each writing piece was complete. No other anomalous properties have been observed, and the pencil has since been stored in the anomalous items locker.
Test 914-1860
Name: Junior Researcher Evangeline Perry
Date: 25/12/2021
Total Items: Four miniature Christmas-themed house models with various miniature human models
Input: One miniature Christmas-themed house model with various miniature human models
Setting: Rough
Output: A pile of dust, which has a mild effect that compels people to describe it as appearing "festive".
Input: One miniature Christmas-themed house model with various miniature human models
Setting: 1:1
Output: One miniature Easter-themed house model. All the human models around it wear bunny ears.
Input: One miniature Christmas-themed house model with various miniature human models
Setting: Fine
Output: One miniature Site-19 Facility 23 model. When looking closer at the human models, all the models are changed into various researchers from the facility. Dr. Veritas can be seen wearing a Santa hat.
Input: One miniature Christmas-themed house model with the miniature Dr. Veritas model from test above
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A statue of Doctor Veritas (the colours were off-base due to the paint colour of the original models being different) which became animate and started a monologue about the important of the Winter Solstice Festival, gave a narration of how the birth of Jesus Christ was not on the 25th of December, listed several dates that experts estimate to be the actual date, after which it spontaneously combusted. It was inert after it was extinguished.
Test 914-1861
Name: Dr. Nightingale
Date: 25/12/2021
Total Items: One small plastic Christmas tree
Input: One small plastic Christmas tree
Setting: Fine
Output: One small plastic Christmas tree, visually unchanged. Object has acquired a cognitohazardous property wherein upon one viewing the tree, the subject is unable to pronounce or spell the word “Christmas” properly. Effect persists for approximately three hours before ending. Placed in Anomalous Storage.
Note: Merry Crimas Chrysler Chriszmizz Kwismasss Crisis Chrimbo [Fifty more misspellings removed for brevity] Happy Holidays, everyone. It’s good to be back, I suppose. - Dr. Nightingale
Test 914-1862
Name: Junior Researcher Boneka
Date: 25/12/2021
Total Items: One miniature ceramic nativity scene, one "elf on the shelf" doll, one wooden nutcracker figure
Input: One miniature ceramic nativity scene
Setting: 1:1
Output: One miniature ceramic scene of Jesus and the two criminals dying on the cross, surrounded by Roman soldiers.
Input: One "elf on the shelf" doll
Setting: Fine
Output: One "elf on the shelf" doll, its outfit altered to resemble a red lab coat donning the Foundation logo on its breast. It is capable of becoming animate if it is not being viewed directly by humans (although camera footage can capture its movement) and will do so to occasionally relocate itself to different areas. At some point, the output obtained JR Boneka's clipboard and pen when she was not looking and wrote down the following notes:
Name | Incident | Verdict |
---|---|---|
D-81947 | Rough handling of outputs, tends to respond to spoken protocol with some resistance. Sagging pants. | Naughty |
JR Boneka | Long hair is properly tied back. | Nice |
JR Shion | Undershirt is mildly wrinkled. | Naughty |
Intern Scott | Tie secured back using tie clip. | Nice |
JR Evangeline | Pants had a hole. | Naughty |
Note: It appears that the doll observes safety violations or precautions made by people in its vicinity and then records them at the nearest opportunity. Although what it considers to be a safety violation seems to range from somewhat reasonable to… nitpicky. - JR Boneka
Input: One wooden nutcracker figure
Setting: Fine
Output: One wooden nutcracker figure, largely unaltered except its mouthpiece is permanently shut and does not move when the lever on the back is pressed.
Addendum: It was discovered that exactly 60 seconds after the lever is last pressed, the output will suddenly become mobile and position itself so its head is pointed towards the subject who pressed the lever. The output will then propel itself (by unknown means) towards the subject's midsection at a recorded velocity of 15 m/s until it makes contact with its target, at which point the object once again becomes inanimate and ceases to exhibit any abnormal behaviors until the lever is once again pressed. The output has since been incinerated and D-81947 has been relieved of testing duties until he makes a full recovery.
Test 914-1863
Name: Junior Researcher Davidson
Date: 25/12/2021
Total Items: One Christmas tree topper in the shape of a star, one meter Christmas tinsel, one Christmas stocking
Input: One Christmas tree topper in the shape of a star
Setting: 1:1
Output: One Christmas tree topper in the shape of a snowman
Input: One Christmas tinsel
Setting: Fine
Output: Christmas tinsel of the same length that wraps itself around a tree by itself. During testing, it was discovered that the tinsel will wrap itself around a tree only if the tree is not artificial.
Note: Could save a lot of time next Christmas, too bad it only wraps itself around real trees. – JR Davidson
Input: One Christmas stocking
Setting: Very Fine
Output: Seemingly normal Christmas stocking. When a D-Class reached into the stocking, they took out a mug with the following text on it: “Best parent ever“ which they said was the thing they wished for the most. After approximately thirty seconds, the item turned into dust. During testing, it was discovered that the dust is from the same material as the stocking. Further testing revealed that the stocking is reduced in size each time a item is taken out of it
Test 914-1864
Name: Researcher Salis
Date: 26/12/2021
Total Items: One voltaic pile, one lithium-ion battery, one typewriter, one Lenovo Thinkpad laptop, one mercury barometer, one built-in smartphone barometer
Note: I am combining some everyday items and their counterparts from the past. - R. Salis
Input: One voltaic pile, one lithium-ion battery
Setting: Fine
Output: One brass-colored hexagonal prism topped by two hexagonal pyramids, with a “-” symbol on one side, opposite a “+” symbol on the other. With the “-” symbol as the anode and the “+” symbol as the cathode, the object produces a consistent, unchanging voltage of 0.01 V. As of the time of writing, the potential difference has not decreased despite 48 hours of continued use. Testing is ongoing.
Note: It would be great if we could reproduce this effect at a higher voltage. There aren't many applications for this as it is right now. - R. Salis
Input: One typewriter, one Lenovo Thinkpad laptop
Setting: Fine
Output: One typewriter with cables and electrodes attached, similar to those used in electroencephalograms. Placing the electrodes on a human head causes the typewriter to begin writing out the person’s thoughts. Due to the speed of human cognition, the nature of abstract thought, and the slowness of the typewriter, results often come out smudged and illegible.
Input: One mercury barometer, one built-in smartphone barometer
Setting: Fine
Output: A barometer that appears to measure “social pressure” in its near vicinity. Measurements increase the more unwanted attention is placed on an individual, and decrease when attention is shifted elsewhere.
Test 914-1865
Name: Intern François Beauvillier
Date: 27/12/2021
Total Items: Three paper Moebius strips, three glass Klein bottles
Input: A Moebius strip
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A sideless and edgeless object. From a mathematical standpoint, this object has no edges nor sides, as proven by all experiments and topological studies conducted. It can be handled as any tangible three-dimensional object, but will induce headaches in the handler. It is yet to be determined if the headaches are caused directly by the object, or are a result of the human brain attempting to comprehend the object.
Input: A Moebius strip
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A 2-dimensional paper strip. Its weight remains the same as the inputted Moebius strip, however, the thickness of the output is virtually null. The object thus appears to be invisible if seen from a perfect 90° angle. Excessive paper seemingly removed from the original strip to achieve null thickness is considered to be anomalously stored in itself in some either spatial or dimensional anomaly, giving it its mass.
Input: A Moebius strip
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A Moebius strip. Causes any space it is contained in to become topologically and spatially inconsistent, resulting in non-Euclidean configurations. The effect decreases proportionally to the distance to the object.
Addendum: Upon the opening of the output booth, the entire facility became spatially inconsistent, causing multiple alarms to trigger and rearranging the room configuration. All researchers but Intern Beauvillier were evacuated. A team was dispatched on site to retrieve and destroy the output, but failed at retrieving it due to the constant spatial changes. After four hours, Intern Beauvillier managed to incinerate the object, effectively reverting the changes caused by the output.
Note: It took me three hours running backwards through the left door and trying to get inside the outside of the testing chamber before realizing the upper door was supposed to be fallen through to reach out to in. - Intern Beauvillier
Input: A Klein bottle
Setting: Very Fine
Output: Output went outside.
Note: Not again. - Intern Beauvillier
Input: A Klein bottle
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A visibly unchanged Klein bottle. However, its volume appears to be completely null, as any liquid poured into it will overflow directly. A glass sphere. Induces in any viewer the impression that it is a Klein bottle. Any liquid or flowing solids (sand, powder, etc.) thought to be poured in the Klein bottle falls off from the glass sphere, thus giving the impression that the bottle is overflowing.
Note: Hah. Hah. Hah. Now my shoes are soaked. - Intern Beauvillier
Input: A Klein bottle
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A Klein bottle, with seemingly infinite volume. All liquids poured into the bottle will diseappear, and all attempts to pour them out were met with failure.
Addendum: Testing revealed the bottle contained a spatial anomaly, teleporting all liquids poured into it to the nearest item composed of fabric. The anomalous effect was discovered by Intern Beauvillier, who reported at first "a high humidity in the room" and "a labcoat that feels extremely damp". Further tests using flowing solids (in this case, sand) met the same results, as Intern Beauvillier reported a "disturbing itching sensation". Gases do not appear to be effected by the bottle's properties.
Test 914-1866
Name: Dr. Ari Marlon
Date: 05/01/2022
Total Items: Five hand-carved wooden figurines of the character White Blood Cell from the animated TV show Cells at Work!
Input: One of the above figurines
Setting: 1:1
Output: One figurine of the character Red Blood Cell from Cells at Work!
Input: One of the above figurines
Setting: 1:1
Output: Two figurines of White Blood Cell. Each are half the mass of the original.
Input: One of the above figurines
Setting: 1:1
Output: One wooden figurine of Dr. Ari Marlon
Input: One of the above figurines
Setting: 1:1
Output: One wooden scale model of a human leukocyte
Input: One of the above figurines
Setting: 1:1
Output: One figurine with lettering on the hat changed from Japanese to Hebrew. No other changes found in figurine
Test 914-1867
Name: Technical Researcher Korowa
Date: 13/01/2021
Total Items: Three Nvidia RTX-3060 graphics cards
Input: One Nvidia RTX-3060 graphics card
Setting: Fine
Output: One visually unchanged card. Upon being installed to a test PC running a stress test program, the output ran at 7000% efficiency. This caused the PC to melt all internal components due to overheating, and rendered it unusable. The test PC was quickly replaced for the next test.
Input: One Nvidia RTX-3060 graphics card
Setting: Fine
Output: One visually unchanged card. Upon being installed to a test PC running a stress test program, the output was recorded to slowly gain efficiency over time. Efficiency appears to have been taken from other running graphics cards within the facility, causing them to lose efficiency. Upon powering off test PC, efficiency was returned to affected cards.
Input: One Nvidia RTX-3060 graphics card
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One smaller graphics card of a unique make labelled "Nvidia RGTX-5310". Output was unable to be installed to a test PC due to socket mismatch. Socket appears to not match any known to exist. Internal scans have shown wires to be few atoms thick.
Test 914-1868
Name: Junior Researcher Joseph Carpenter
Date: 13/01/2022
Total Items: One standard, blank VHS videotape with marker scribbles on the label
Input: Aforementioned VHS videotape
Setting: Fine
Output: One VHS videotape with “Facility 19-23 Break Room’s Funniest Home Videos” written on the label. Playing the tape shows a montage of random facility personnel performing tests with SCP-914. Most tests involve the tester blatantly violating testing protocols, resulting in tragic and destructive outcomes. Occasionally there will be a harmless prank, also involving random staff. However, all personnel shown in tests are either heavily injured or killed by said tests, followed by a laugh track. Generic guitar and piano music accompanies the tape in the background. The tape is full, resulting in a 4-hour playtime with over 510 tests shown, all being completely unique. Some facility personnel appear to show up multiple times whether or not they were killed in a previous clip. No anomalous effects have been recorded.
Note: Well I’m very glad we’re all smarter than this. Does anyone suppose we could use parts of this as a training video on what not to do? - JR Carpenter
Note: You can try, but unlikely, some of the people here are beyond help. - Veritas
Test 914-1869
Name: Junior Researcher Brooke
Date: 17/01/2022
Total Items: One article regarding the COVID-19 pandemic, printed on paper
Input: Aforementioned article
Setting: Fine
Output: One article, dated 05/03/2032. The article describes a currently unknown virus spreading throughout Europe and Asia. The article contains a map of cases throughout the world, and notable changes are present, including Russia being divided in half, and China occupying Mongolia.
Test 914-1870
Name: Junior Researcher Allen
Date: 25/01/2022
Total Items: Four M231 Firing Port Weapons
Note: The M231 is an adaptation off of the M16 rifle design. It is commonly mounted on an M2 Bradley for anti-personnel defense, chambered in 5.56. It is capable of firing at 1225 RPM. It is warned not to remove it from the vehicle unless there is an emergency. - J.R. Allen
Input: One rifle
Setting: Rough
Output: A scattered pile of components with damage resembling a firing malfunction.
Input: One rifle
Setting: Coarse
Output: Multiple piles of components sorted between mechanical complicity.
Input: One rifle
Setting: 1:1
Output: One Colt SMG 633, lacking a semi-auto function.
Note: It seems that it interprets “anti-personnel weapons” and “personal defense weapons” to be the same class of firearm. - J.R. Allen
Input: One rifle
Setting: Fine
Output: One visually unchanged rifle. Output was mounted to the floor for testing after clearing anomalous screening. When fired, the rifle broke off of the mounting and lodged in the wall behind it. The action was found to be heavily damaged during the test. Upon review of the security footage, it was discovered that the output fired at a rate of 73,500 RPM, or 1225 rounds a second, rather than 1225 RPM, which is only 20 rounds a second. Repairing the damaged portions removed the anomalous effects.
Test 914-1871
Name: Researcher Salis
Date: 25/01/2022
Total Items: One USB drive containing a copy of the video game Trap Adventure 2, a platforming iOS game noted for its high difficulty
Input: Aforementioned USB drive
Setting: Fine
Output: One visually unchanged USB drive, containing a file in .mp4 format titled "Mercy." Playing the file results in a thirty second video depicting various scenes of nature, accompanied by peaceful music and the sounds of birds chirping, followed by five minutes of auditory and visual cognitohazards, triggering outbursts of aggression. Incinerated.
Test 914-1872
Name: Weapons Researcher Sam Szymons
Date: 25/01/2022
Total Items: One Carro Armato L3/33 tankette
Input: Aforementioned tankette
Setting: Fine
Output: An automaton resembling former Dictator Benito Mussolini made from the parts of the inputted vehicle. A mass of steel, chains, rivets and a motor that fell apart upon exiting the booth. The input's onboard communications system was found to have been anomalously modified to repeatedly broadcast samples of the former Dictator saying "Si Si Si" ("Yes Yes Yes" in Italian). Upon the output falling apart, the broadcast stopped, presumably because the battery became disconnected from the radio system. The output’s parts have been incinerated.
Test 914-1873
Name: Junior Researcher Brooke
Date: 25/01/2022
Total Items: Three VHS videotapes, each containing an episode of Jeopardy
Input: One VHS videotape, containing an episode of Jeopardy
Setting: 1:1
Output: One VHS videotape, containing an episode of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire.
Input: One VHS videotape, containing an episode of Jeopardy
Setting: Fine
Output: One visually unaltered VHS videotape, containing the identical episode of Jeopardy. Individuals who view the videotape will only be able to reply to questions with answers beginning with “What is”. This effect wears off after four hours. Object incinerated.
Input: One VHS videotape, containing an episode of Jeopardy
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One VHS videotape, containing an altered episode of Jeopardy. All categories and questions are related to the Foundation. Of the 61 questions, 23 have answers which require Security Clearance 4 and above, of which 7 require Level 5 Clearance. Incinerated due to descriptions of several infohazardous SCPs, and the possibility of an information breach. All personnel who have watched the videotape have been amnesticized.
Test 914-1874
Name: Junior Researcher Shion
Date: 26/01/2022
Total Items: 67g of commercially-available graphite, 68 small glass containers, one gram of pure hexagonal graphite
Note: I will be inputting 1 gram samples of graphite into SCP-914 on 1:1 multiple times, in hopes that the carbon allotrope will be changed in the process. An allotrope is a form of an element in a specific physical state, and elements like carbon can form multiple different allotropes, such as graphite and diamond, in which the carbon atoms are bonded together differently. I will be relying on the assumption that the 1:1 setting is capable of rearranging chemical bonds, much like the Coarse setting is, and that by relying on SCP-914's inherent randomness (as per Test 914-1846), eventually a desired result will be produced. - JR Shion
Input: 1g of graphite within a glass container
Setting: 1:1
Output: One 0.7 mm diameter graphite stick, akin to those used as mechanical pencil leads. One glass model of a carpenter pencil, missing its core.
Input: 1g of graphite within a glass container
Setting: 1:1
Output: 1 small model wheel, composed mainly of glass, with a graphite tire fitted around its rim.
Input: 1g of graphite within a glass container
Setting: 1:1
Output: One small graphite gear, accompanied by many smaller glass nuts and bolts.
[Tests 4-67, conducted over the course of 7 hours, expunged for brevity.]
Input: 1g of graphite within a glass container
Setting: 1:1
Output: Unchanged input. The glass container was unusually cold upon retrieval, but returned to match the ambient temperature over time. Upon further analysis, the graphite powder was determined to be entirely in rhombohedral form.
Note: Finally! Rhombohedral graphite is a less stable form of graphite than the input, which was primarily in hexagonal form. It seems SCP-914 changed the allotropic form of the input carbon, but, due to the lower stability of the alternate allotropic form, took in heat from its surroundings to convert the more stable allotrope into the less stable one. If this hypothesis is correct, inputting pure hexagonal graphite, which is more stable than the rhombohedral-hexagonal graphite mixture available commercially, will result in the resulting output having an even lower temperature than this one, because 914 will have to take in even more heat to form unstable rhombohedral graphite. - JR Shion
Input: 1g of hexagonal graphite powder, within a glass container. Temperature of both items measured at 25°C.
Setting: 1:1
Output: Glass powder within a 1g hexagonal graphite container. Temperature of output unchanged.
Note: I'll… put this idea on hold for now. - JR Shion
Test 914-1875
Name: Researcher Travis
Date: 04/02/2022
Total Items: Five correction mice
Note: Hi, I'm new here. - Researcher Travis
Input: One correction mouse
Setting: Rough
Output: One destroyed correction mouse. The output appears to have been crushed with a heavy object.
Input: One correction mouse
Setting: Coarse
Output: One disassembled correction mouse. The disassembled pieces have been organised from largest to smallest.
Input: One correction mouse
Setting: 1:1
Output: One correction mouse, reassembled to appear like a roll of duct tape. A pile of plastic remains.
Input: One correction mouse
Setting: Fine
Output: One visually unchanged correction mouse. Testing revealed that the correction mouse could only be used on words that aren’t misspelled. Attempting to use the correction mouse on a misspelled word will cause both of the user’s arms to become paralysed for 5 minutes. Placed in Anomalous Storage.
Input: One correction mouse
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One ██████████ ████, unchanged from input. The ██████ possesses an anomalous property causing any nouns or pronouns used to describe ██ to be automatically redacted. Placed in Anomalous Storage.
Test 914-1876
Name: Junior Researcher Arcadia
Date: 06/02/2022
Total Items: Five wet floor signs
Input: One wet floor sign
Setting: Rough
Output: A pile of shredded plastic and paint
Input: One wet floor sign
Setting: Coarse
Output: One floor sign labeled "Water Resistant Floor" with broken hinges, preventing it from standing properly.
Input: One wet floor sign
Setting: 1:1
Output: One floor sign labeled "Proceed With Caution"
Input: One wet floor sign
Setting: Fine
Output: One blank wet floor sign One wet floor sign, the text for which only becomes visible when the sign is within a 5 meter radius of a liquid mass on the floor.
Input: One wet floor sign
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One floor sign labeled "Slippery" which, when placed on any solid surface, anomalously causes a large decrease in the effects of dry friction within a 10 meter radius. Incinerated.
Note: I need an ice pack. - Junior Researcher Arcadia
Test 914-1877
Name: Researcher Mott
Date: 08/02/2022
Total Items: Three ResMed brand CPAP machines with tubes and masks. A CPAP machine is a medical device similar to a ventilator. It is used to treat sleep apnea, a common medical condition usually characterized by snoring and poor sleep quality.
Input: One ResMed CPAP machine with tube and mask
Setting: 1:1
Output: One Philips Respironics brand CPAP machine. The software installed was the same as the input, rendering it nonfunctional.
Input: One ResMed CPAP machine with tube and mask
Setting: Fine
Output: One unbranded CPAP machine. Visually resembles the original CPAP, with several unmarked dials to the left of the LCD screen. Testing with a D-Class revealed that the dials automatically adjusted themselves once the mask was affixed to the face. Subject reported “the best sleep I’ve had in a while.” Notably, each dial has a different effect after being adjusted manually. Effects can be maintained by holding onto the dial. Recorded effects:
- An increase of pressure to 100 PSI
- Extreme heat, over 200 degrees Celsius. Items remained undamaged.
- Air being laced with the smell of steak
- Water pouring out of the output tube. Takes water from the humidification tank, and then from the surrounding air
- Rapid puffs of air
- Metal ''moths'' flying out of the output tube. Moths become inert after approximately 30 seconds of flight. After 1 minute of production, the item powered down and would not turn back on.
Disassembly revealed metal internal components had been severely damaged, causing the item to fail. Remains incinerated.
Input: One ResMed CPAP machine with tube and mask
Setting: Very Fine
Output: Unchanged CPAP machine CPAP machine that, once affixed to face, will heavily resist any attempt to remove it. The item will use the mask and tube as an appendage, rapidly flinging itself toward its target’s face. Once the mask is affixed, the target will fall comatose and the item will attempt to asphyxiate the target. If the item succeeds, it will fall inert and the message ''Sleep Tight'' is displayed on the LCD screen. The item attempted to latch onto a second victim, but was overpowered and incinerated.
Test 914-1878
Name: Junior Researcher Arcadia
Date: 11/02/2022
Total Items: Five Ford Modular Coyote V8 gasoline engines
Input: One gasoline engine
Setting: Rough
Output: A mixture of powdered aluminum and iron, and trace amounts of magnesium oxide.
Input: One gasoline engine
Setting: Coarse
Output: Aforementioned engine, but fully disassembled.
Input: One gasoline engine
Setting: 1:1
Output: One GMC Northstar V8 diesel engine
Input: One gasoline engine
Setting: Fine
Output: A 6 piston gasoline car engine of unknown make and model. Engine appears to have more fuel efficiency.
Input: One gasoline engine
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A very complex engine of unknown make and model. Unlike typical car engines, this one appears to have components similar to those found in nuclear fission reactors; instead of pistons and a fuel injector it has water turbines and pipes. Non-functional on account of the lack of nuclear material.
Note: I should be more careful next time, the magnesium from the first engine most likely oxidized after it refined through the "Rough" setting. - Junior Researcher Arcadia
Test 914-1879
Name: Junior Researcher Zen
Date: 11/02/2022
Total Items: Five flasks of insulin
Input: One flask of insulin
Setting: Rough
Output: One pile of broken glass, one puddle of insulin.
Input: One flask of insulin
Setting: Coarse
Output: Two smaller flasks, one containing pure insulin and the other containing various chemical compounds.
Note: This needs an explanation. This is commercialized insulin, so it contains other substances to make its effect spread in the three hours after the injection, to adjust the pH, to reduce reactions on the injection site, and other functions. I'll continue with this one, but I'll try the pure form another time. - Junior Researcher Zen
Input: One flask of insulin
Setting: 1:1
Output: A slightly smaller flask than the input and a considerably smaller one, the first filled with oxygenated water, the second with glucagon. Glucagon is a hormone similar to insulin but is considered its antithesis because of its property to increase the blood sugar level. A puddle of chemical compounds was also found in the output chamber, presumably the amino acids in excess.
Input: One flask of insulin
Setting: Fine
Output: One flask of insulin. Testing revealed that the effects are not spread at an equal level at all times, but are proportional to the blood sugar level. However, the effect is more powerful than necessary, causing very unpredictable changes in the blood sugar level of the patient, as blood sugar level increases are matched with extreme insulin reaction, provoking a sudden drop in sugar levels, producing uncontrollable results. After enough treatment, every D-Class it was tested on returned healthy.
Input: One flask of insulin
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One flask of an unknown substance. Tests on subjects with Type I diabetes revealed that the substance causes the regrowth of beta cells, which are responsible for insulin production. However, ex-diabetic patients with regrowth islets and healthy patients experience an overgrowth of them with no control, but those still work as normal, overproducing insulin and causing constant hypoglycemia. Surgical removal of the cells was effective only for short time due to the unstopped regrowth. Regular surgical removal is the only way to keep patients alive for long periods.
Test 914-1880
Name: Researcher Salis, Intern Scott assisting
Date: 13/02/2022
Total Items: Ten 1kg copper cubes
Note: A multitude of the tests in the past have been run in the order Rough-Coarse-1:1-Fine-Very Fine. There may be a possibility that 914's outputs are influenced by the order the settings are used in. To test this, I will perform a control test with the typical Rough-Coarse-1:1-Fine-Very Fine setting order, followed by a second test in the reverse setting order. To prevent knowledge about the experimental procedure from influencing the results of the experiment (as per Test 914-1511), I will be taking amnestics before both the control and the second experimental test sets. Instructions for each test will be provided separately, while note-taking will be done by Intern Scott. - R. Salis
Note: Researcher Salis was amnesticized before conducting the following five tests. Instructions for each test were provided via five separate pre-written notecards, each in pre-sealed envelopes. - Intern Scott
Input: One cube
Setting: Rough
Output: Numerous copper chunks of varying sizes and shapes, partially melted.
Input: One cube
Setting: Coarse
Output: Four copper ingots, each 250g
Input: One cube
Setting: 1:1
Output: 1kg of copper washers and nuts
Input: One cube
Setting: Fine
Output: 1kg of copper safety pins
Input: One cube
Setting: Very Fine
Output: 1kg of copper ball bearings. Any force applied to a single ball bearing is spread out over the others, with the force experienced by each ball bearing equal to the initial force divided by the number of bearings it is spread over. Incinerating some of the ball bearings resulted in the remaining bearings experiencing more of the force applied.
Note: With the control tests completed, Researcher Salis was amnesticized before conducting the experimental portion of the test. Instructions for the next five tests continued to be provided via pre-written notecards in sealed envelopes. - Intern Scott
Input: One cube
Setting: Very Fine
Output: Two animate copper figurines in the shape of Researcher Salis and SCP-914, as well as five small copper cubes. The figurine of Researcher Salis possesses a cognitohazardous effect causing viewers to believe that any action taken by the figurine is one that they have done in the past, creating false memories in the viewer of performing the action recently. Upon the output booth opening, the figurines became animate, and performed a recreation of the first five tests using the miniature copper cubes.
Note: To prevent the output's effects from affecting the remainder of the tests, Researcher Salis was amnesticized before conducting the next test. - Intern Scott
Input: One cube
Setting: Fine
Output: A pile of small hexagonal copper pellets, similar in shape to Class W mnestic pills. The outputted copper possesses an anomalous property causing it to oxidize quickly upon exposure to air, replacing the surface with green patina at a highly accelerated rate.
Input: One cube
Setting: 1:1
Output: Ten thin copper sheets covered in raised dots similar to Braille writing. Analysis revealed that each sheet contains a copy of one of the different sets of sealed instructions used for the test.
Note: To prevent knowledge about the overall test procedure from affecting the remainder of the tests, Researcher Salis was amnesticized before conducting the next test. - Intern Scott
Input: One cube
Setting: Coarse
Output: 1kg of copper dust, arranged in a cognitohazardous pattern that undoes the effects of any amnestics taken within the past hour.
Note: To prevent the output's effects from affecting the remainder of the tests, the output was incinerated, and Researcher Salis was amnesticized before conducting the next test. - Intern Scott
Input: One cube
Setting: Rough
Output: A highly dented chunk of copper, launched out at high speeds in the direction of testing Staff.
Note: After five rounds of amnestics and a severe headache, I can safely say… results inconclusive? -R. Salis
Note: Go to the medbay to get some rest, Salis. Those nosebleeds should probably tell you that you were overexposed to amnestics about two tests ago. - Veritas
Test 914-1881
Name: Junior Researcher Davidson
Date: 14/02/2022
Total Items: Four medallions from different witcher schools from the video game series The Witcher
Note: The shape of a witcher's medallion depends on what school they trained in; for example, School of the Wolf, School of the Cat etc. The medallions have the shape of the head of the creature the school is named after. All medallions in the universe of "The Witcher" are made out of silver. – JR Davidson
Input: School of the Griffin medallion
Setting: Rough
Output: A pile of silver powder
Input: School of the Cat medallion
Setting: Coarse
Output: The medallion with a pile of chain links positioned next to it
Input: School of the Manticore medallion
Setting: 1:1
Output: A medallion depicting a Wyvern. This witcher school does not exist in any Witcher media.
Input: School of the Wolf medallion
Setting: Fine
Output: Physically unchanged medallion. If a person puts the medallion on, their hearing and olfactory senses become enhanced to a degree similar to that of a wolf. It was also discovered that the person wearing the medallion becomes red-green colorblind until they remove the medallion.
Test 914-1882
Name: Intern Clint Po
Date: 14/02/2022
Total Items: One metal woven basket
Input: Aforementioned basket
Setting: Fine
Output: One visually unchanged basket. Any documents written on letter-sized copy paper that are placed into paper shredders within Site-19 Facility 23 will be anomalously transported into the basket in an undamaged state, with the ink on the document rearranged to cause an appearance similar to standard Foundation research budget approval forms. Incinerated due to potential information breaches.
Test 914-1883
Name: Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku
Date: 18/02/2022
Total Items: One glass cup containing 300mL of mineral water
Input: Glass of water
Setting: Fine
Output: A small glass bottle with a glass screw cap, containing 300mL of water
Input: Bottle of water from previous output
Setting: Fine
Output: A small glass bowl containing water, with the words "Drik Me"(sic) engraved onto the side. Most human subjects viewing the bowl report a mild feeling of thirstiness, and an urge to drink the water from the bowl. A small number of said subjects also report a temporary urge to pronounce the English word "drink" as "drik".
Input: Bowl of water from previous output
Setting: Fine
Output: A similar bowl of water, but without the engravings. The bowl attempts to slowly propel itself via unknown means towards the location of the nearest human mouth in its proximity, while emitting a soft vocalisation resembling the word "drink" in a high-pitched voice.
Input: Moving bowl of water from previous output
Setting: Fine
Output: A glass syringe containing 300mL of water, placed on an animate glass pedestal with its tip facing up. The object moved and discharged approximately 10mL of water into Researcher Belopaku's mouth when he opened his mouth to speak. Assuming it shot water into open mouths, the object was carried out of the output chamber in silence. However, approximately 20 seconds later, the object started discharging a constant stream of water at Belopaku's closed mouth until it was completely empty while emitting a loud shriek.
Test 914-1884
Name: Junior Researcher Zen
Date: 18/02/2022
Total Items: Five Olympic style recurve bows, made of carbon fiber with metal stabilizers and sights
Input: One recurve bow
Setting: Rough
Output: The bow, still recognizable, but broken and partially melted.
Input: One recurve bow
Setting: Coarse
Output: The bow, disassembled and in the storage position.
Input: One recurve bow
Setting: 1:1
Output: One hunting composite bow, made of carbon fiber and metal, with no stabilizer and a larger sight.
Input: One recurve bow
Setting: Fine
Output: A targeting crossbow made of carbon fiber and metal. The grip is connected to the string, so throwing the dart means having the user's arm pulled forward with great strength. The calculated force would result in fractures or even the breaking of said bones, if used by a normal human.
Input: One recurve bow
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A compound bow, with a draw force of about 300 lbs/1360 N. No member of personnel was able to draw the bow, it was only drawn once with a mechanical device, and the measured arrow velocity was about 400 m/s, far greater than expected. This would result in the snapping of the bones of an average human using it.
Test 914-1885
Name: Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku
Date: 18/02/2022
Total Items: Ten vials of sterilized liquid extracted from KFC brand fried chicken, one hundred and ten empty glass vials
Note: This is supposed to see if 914 can separate the "11 secret herbs and spices" of the KFC chicken recipe, but it can interpret the input in any other way it wants. - Belopaku
Input: One vial of fried chicken extract, eleven empty vials
Setting: Coarse
Output: 12 empty vials and one puddle of fried chicken extract
Input: One vial of fried chicken extract, eleven empty vials
Setting: Coarse
Output: A puddle of an oily mixture, a cube of glass, a cube composed of various plastics originating from the vial lids, and a small amount of various solid organic substances in powder form
Input: One vial of fried chicken extract, eleven empty vials
Setting: Coarse
Output: One large empty vial and one puddle of fried chicken extract
Input: One vial of fried chicken extract, eleven empty vials
Setting: Coarse
Output: One empty vial, one vial containing various oily solvents, one vial containing water, one vial containing various proteins in solid powder form, one vial containing various salts in solid powder form, and 7 vials containing very small amounts of miscellaneous organic material in various compositions
Input: One vial of fried chicken extract, eleven empty vials
Setting: 1:1
Output: 12 small glass sculptures with the appearance of fried chicken parts, and a vial-shaped object composed of the fried chicken extract frozen solid at a low temperature
Input: One vial of fried chicken extract, eleven empty vials
Setting: 1:1
Output: One empty vial and 11 vials containing various amounts of liquid. Further testing has revealed that the contents of all 11 vials were identical in composition.
Input: One vial of fried chicken extract, eleven empty vials
Setting: 1:1
Output: 12 small puddles of fried chicken extract, 11 of them containing small particles of glass and plastics
Input: One vial of fried chicken extract, eleven empty vials
Setting: 1:1
Output: Multiple glass shards surrounding a puddle of what appears to be the fried chicken extract altered to mimic the odor and appearance of vertebrate blood.
Input: One vial of fried chicken extract, eleven empty vials
Setting: 1:1
Output: One large vial containing the unchanged fried chicken extract.
Input: One vial of fried chicken extract, eleven empty vials
Setting: Fine
Output: An opaque rectangular device with a large button on its top face. Upon a press of the button, the device will emit a sound mimicking that of a deep frier for approximately 5 seconds.
Test 914-1886
Name: Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku
Date: 18/02/2022
Total Items: Four ballpoint pens, four sheets of A4 size printing paper
Input: One pen, one sheet of paper
Setting: Coarse
Output: One sheet of paper drenched in ink, a sphere composed of various plastics, and a small sphere of metal
Input: One pen, one sheet of paper
Setting: 1:1
Output: A thin sheet of plastic, and a pen-shaped device made using paper and various metallic parts. Ink began leaking out of the device shortly after the output booth was opened.
Input: One pen, one sheet of paper
Setting: Fine
Output: A thin, white square plate made from a composite plastic polymer material. Parts of its surface that has been in contact with human skin will turn black for up to 14 seconds, allowing it to be used as a temporary writing device using one's finger.
Input: One pen, one sheet of paper
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A lightweight tablet composed of a composite plastic polymer material with the appearance of an 11 inch iPad Pro, and another object resembling the associated Apple Pencil device. Attempting to write on the surface of the tablet using the pencil device will result in what seems to be an unrelated English sentence or phrase appearing on the screen instead. During this process, to an outside observer, the writer's hand movements will appear to match that of the words in the unrelated English sentence or phrase being written. The screen will refresh after approximately 5 minutes after the two devices are removed from contact with each other. The generated output differs every attempt, and the significance of said outputs are unknown. A selection of generated outputs are provided below.
Attempted Input | Output | Notes | Subject |
---|---|---|---|
test | The | Initial test. | Researcher Belopaku |
Who is the prime minister of Japan? | Life is confusing and I want a cookie. | Attempt at asking a query, assuming the output may be a response to the input. | Researcher Belopaku |
Life is confusing and I want a cookie. | What we usually do but with less light? | Inputting previous output sentence to determine the significance of its outputs. | Researcher Belopaku |
Yuyuni Belopaku | fish and chips | N/A | Researcher Belopaku |
I am a blue whale. | This is a nice pencil. | Attempt at writing the same sentence in both English and Spanish. | Researcher Belopaku |
Soy una ballena azul. | The wheel is the most powerful weapon. | See above. Belopaku stated that he wrote the sentence more slowly than usual, as he does not speak Spanish. Meanwhile to the outside observer, it appeared as if he was writing a longer English sentence at a normal pace. | Researcher Belopaku |
[meaningless scribbles] | I could say I miss the place, but it's not really the place that I miss, it's the memories. | Test to determine if actual language input is necessary for the device's effect. | D-57236 |
Who are you? | It is a late summer morning. | N/A | Researcher Belopaku |
John F. Kennedy | rapid quantum decay | N/A | Researcher Belopaku |
The death of | I'm sorry for | Belopaku took a short break after this output, stating that (despite it most likely being a coincidence) the output seemed like it was referring to the recent death of Researcher Jane Cho, the cause of which was advanced psychological degradation from previous exposure to certain outputs from SCP-914. | Researcher Belopaku |
The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog. | Tornadoes are responsible for 40% of the world's economy. | Test to determine if the user has any effect on the output. | Security Chief Sedna |
[meaningless scribbles] | Walking from London to Paris takes 8 hours. | Same as above, repeating D-57236's test. | Researcher Belopaku |
Additional rows omitted for brevity |
Test 914-1887
Name: Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku
Date: 18/02/2022
Total Items: Multiple photographs of Foundation personnel printed on plain printing paper
Input: A group photograph of the original research crew assigned to SCP-914, taken 23/11/2008
Setting: 1:1
Output: The same photograph, except all faces of the photographed personnel that are not Dr. Gears are replaced by that of Dr. Gears.
Input: A group photograph of the original research crew assigned to SCP-914, taken 23/11/2008
Setting: 1:1
Output: An image of what appears to be a black-and-white portrait of SCP-914. Some parts of the depicted gear configuration differs from the actual object. Upon further inspection, it was concluded to be identical to SCP-914's appearance at the time of the original photograph's taking, as its internal configuration has shifted slightly over time.
Input: A group photograph of the original research crew assigned to SCP-914, taken 23/11/2008
Setting: Fine
Output: A small paper model of the original Facility 23 building, before it was rebuilt in 2017.
Input: A photograph of Dr. Veritas in his office, taken by Researcher Belopaku the day before the experiment
Setting: 1:1
Output: An image depicting Dr. Gears in his office. There are no known photographs matching the image.
Input: A photograph of Dr. Veritas in his office, taken by Researcher Belopaku the day before the experiment
Setting: 1:1
Output: An image depicting Dr. Veritas in the same pose but from behind his chair. Notably, Researcher Belopaku is absent in his position from which he took the original photograph.
Input: A photograph of Dr. Veritas in his office, taken by Researcher Belopaku the day before the experiment
Setting: Fine
Output: An image of Researcher Belopaku in Dr. Veritas' office A piece of paper with mind-affecting symbols. Human subjects viewing said symbols will instead see what appears to be a photograph of said subject sitting in Dr. Veritas' office in place of the symbols.
Input: A photograph of Site-19 Director Tilda Moose, taken 08/05/2019
Setting: 1:1
Output: [DATA EXPUNGED]
Note: Output contained an image depicting a Foundation official with a similar ranking to Director Moose, but whose existence was classified beyond the clearance levels of most involved personnel. Personnel without proper clearance for the information have been amnesticized. - Security Chief Sedna
Test 914-1888
Name: Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku
Date: 18/02/2022
Total Items: Multiple photographs of Foundation personnel printed on plain printing paper
Input: A photograph of Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku, taken 18/03/2021
Setting: 1:1
Output: An image of what appears to be Researcher Belopaku sleeping on his bed in the dark, viewed from the top down. The details of his room appear to be accurate to its appearance the night before the experiment.
Note: Mildly threatening. - Belopaku
Input: A photograph of Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku, taken 18/03/2021
Setting: 1:1
Output: A sheet of paper with a shape resembling the silhouette of Researcher Belopaku in the original photograph. A small image depicting a slightly bent rectangular piece of paper on a white surface appears to be printed onto its surface.
Input: A photograph of Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku, taken 18/03/2021
Setting: Fine
Output: A small paper model of a camera. The object makes a shutter sound whenever its lens is pointed at Researcher Belopaku with an uninterrupted line of sight. However, it does not seem to be taking any actual photographs.
Input: A group photograph of the Site-19 Facility 23 research crew, taken 06/10/2019
Setting: 1:1
Output: The same photograph, but personnel who no longer work in Facility 23 have been replaced by a number of current Facility 23 research personnel who have started working in the facility after the original photo was taken.
Input: A group photograph of the Site-19 Facility 23 research crew, taken 06/10/2019
Setting: 1:1
Output: The same photograph, but all persons in the image have been replaced by what appear to be multiple identical objects resembling a vertically elongated SCP-914, with wigs placed on top resembling the corresponding person's hairstyle.
Input: A group photograph of the Site-19 Facility 23 research crew, taken 06/10/2019
Setting: Fine
Output: A piece of paper depicting a live video feed of Researcher Belopaku. The information depicted on the object was confirmed to be accurate, and the object was incinerated due to concerns of information security and privacy.
Test 914-1889
Name: Dr. Ari Marlon
Date: 18/02/2022
Total Items: One hand carved figurine of Dr. Ari Marlon
Note: I personally carved this figurine. - Dr. Marlon
Input: One figurine
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One figurine of Revolver Ocelot from the Metal Gear videogames. The figurine caused D-18013 to sing while he held it. D-18013 seemed unable to put down the figurine during this time.
Addendum: Further testing revealed the figurine to have several anomalous effects that would trigger randomly upon somebody picking up the object. Effects have been displayed below.
- Transported the holder four meters to the right
- Caused the holder to sing. Songs mainly had a patriotic or military theme.
- Caused the holder to act like a cat for an hour
- Caused the holder to speak in Russian for 45 minutes
- Stuck itself to the holder’s hand for an hour
- No effects are observed
Note: It’s anomalous Russian Roulette with a Revolver (Ocelot figurine). - Dr. Marlon
Test 914-1890
Name: Junior Researcher Evangeline Perry
Date: 19/02/2022
Total Items: Four different Bratz dolls
Note: The Bratz were a brand of toy dolls that were very popular in the early 2000s. - J.R. Perry
Input: One doll of the Bratz character Cloe
Setting: 1:1
Output: One Action Man doll, but depicted as a female version, shorter than the other models.
Input: One doll of the Bratz character Jade
Setting: 1:1
Output: Same as input, but the Bratz doll seems to resemble a close likeliness to the actress Janel Parrish.
Note: Janel Parrish was the actress who portrayed Jade in the live-action movie: Bratz: The movie - J.R. Perry
Input: One doll of the Bratz character Sasha
Setting: Fine
Output: One seemingly identical doll of Sasha. It will turn its head towards anyone in the room, depending on who's closest.
Input: One doll of the Bratz character Yasmin
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A construction of the doll head, with the rest of the doll transformed to form multiple improvised legs, six in total. The output immediately attempted to escape by walking up the wall towards the ventilation shaft but was shot down by a security agent.
Test 914-1891
Name: Researcher Salis
Date: 19/02/2022
Total Items: One two-subject spiral notebook, with perforated college-ruled pages
Input: Aforementioned notebook
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One spiral notebook, with perforated, completely blank pages. Creating any sort of ink marking on the papers and then tearing the paper off along the perforation results in the removed paper spontaneously folding itself into an origami paper crane. The crane anomalously takes flight, moving aimlessly for a duration proportional to the amount of ink on the page.
Test 914-1892
Name: Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku
Date: 21/02/2022
Total Items: Six Five 3D printed and hand-painted globes of Earth with accurate topography
Input: One globe
Setting: 1:1
Output: One topographic globe of an unknown Mars-like rocky desert planet, labeled "Map of Fars"(sic) on its base.
Input: One globe
Setting: 1:1
Output: A flat circular plate depicting a topographic map of the world in an azimuthal equidistant projection centered on the North Pole. The words "The Fat Earth"(sic) are engraved into the backside.
Input: One globe
Setting: Fine
Output: A globe visually nearly identical to the input. Further inspection shows that it has been altered to be more detailed, accurately depicting elevation data on a micrometer scale. However, spinning the globe for more than 15 rotations in a single direction by a human subject will greatly accelerate the rate of the subject's bowel movements for approximately three hours.
Input: One globe
Setting: Fine
Output: A large plastic knife, with the words "THE WORLD BUT IF KNIFE"(sic) engraved onto its handle. It is not very sharp, but is anomalously able to easily cut through objects that are depictions of Earth, such as physical world maps and globes. Human subjects in contact with the object report a mild urge to use it to cut various depictions of Earth.
Input: One globe
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A globe with multiple glowing dots, marking locations of multiple major Foundation facilities across the world. A human subject tapping one of the dots with a finger while their other hand is in contact with the globe's base will instantly kill said subject and teleport their remains to the main entrance of the facility marked by the dot.
Note: Testing halted. Output has been incinerated. - Security Chief Sedna
Test 914-1893
Name: Junior Researcher Boneka
Date: 21/02/2022
Total Items: One printed flowchart depicting an explanation of the God paradox.
Note: This is a philosophical paradox that poses the question, "Can God make a stone that is so heavy that not even He can lift it?". It is designed to challenge the concept of an omnipotent God, as either answer to the question would mean that there is something that God is incapable of doing. - JR Boneka
Input: One flowchart
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One tightly crumpled piece of paper. When unfolded, the text on it is revealed to read "Try me". No anomalous effects appear to be present, even after prolonged screening.
Input: Previous output
Setting: Coarse
Output: One unchanged piece of paper. Screening reveals no alterations or anomalies.
Input: Previous output
Setting: Fine
Output: One unchanged piece of paper. Screening again reveals no alterations or anomalies.
Input: Previous output
Setting: Rough
Output: One unchanged piece of paper. No indication of damage is present.
[Tests 5 through 17 redacted for brevity. Object was tested multiple times on various settings, always producing the same result.]
Note: After all these tests and the painstaking efforts undertaken to identify any possible changes made in between each of them, I'm forced to conclude that what 914 did is create an output that possesses an anomalous trait in which it is completely incapable of being altered by 914's refinement process on any setting. I can't help but wonder if this is 914's way of referring to itself as a god. - JR Boneka
Test 914-1894
Name: Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku
Date: 18/02/2022
Total Items: Eight small plastic chairs
Input: Two small plastic chairs
Setting: Coarse
Output: 16 smaller plastic chairs
Input: Two small plastic chairs
Setting: 1:1
Output: 2 small plastic tables
Input: Two small plastic chairs
Setting: Fine
Output: A larger plastic chair with the words "CHAIR BUT BETTER" written across the back. Subjects viewing the chair report a mild urge to sit on it, and subjects sitting on the chair are deluded into thinking that it is very comfortable, despite it being a hard surface.
Input: Two small plastic chairs
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A large, hollow plastic chair with the appearance of a throne, with a similar mind-affecting effect to the above output. Upon being carried out of the output chamber, the object initiated a conversation with Researcher Belopaku, resulting in a brief incident resulting in a partial destruction of the object. A transcript of the incident is provided below.
[BEGIN LOG]
Output: Hello, I am the best chair ever.
Belopaku: You can speak. Can you hear me?
Output: Yes, because I am better than all the other chairs that cannot hear you.
Belopaku: (on radio) 109-B to Sedna. We got a possible sentient output here, and the mind-affecting effect from before is also present and possibly stronger.
At this point, Belopaku begins slowly walking towards the object. One security guard enters the room.
Output: Do not fight back, it is only natural to want to sit in the best chair ever made. I will not hurt you.
Belopaku: Can you control this ability? Are you consciously affecting my mind?
Output: I do not have mind-control abilities. You are the one who wants to sit in me. I cannot change what you desire.
Belopaku: That's not true, but I will take that as a-
Belopaku suddenly leans forward, and stops himself from going further by holding onto both of the object's armrests. The security guard approaches.
Output: I do not understand, why do you resist what your heart tells you? Am I threatening?
The security guard quickly pulls the object away from Belopaku, causing him to collapse onto the floor. Then, the guard immediately takes a seat on the object.
Belopaku: Wha-
Output: Oh, I see, someone who actually appreciates me. Someone who actually understands that I am superior to all other chairs.
The object starts gradually bending under the security guard's weight, before breaking and collapsing on the floor. Meanwhile, Belopaku evacuates the room.
Output: No, no, this cannot be! How am I to be the best chair ever when I am… I am like this?
The object has ceased vocalization indefinitely after this point.
[END LOG]
Note: I had to go over the security footage to verify if this was real. Without hearing the voice of the chair, this is one of the more bizarre things I've seen in my career, and I've seen one or two. - Veritas
Test 914-1895
Name: Technical Researcher Korowa
Date: 18/02/2022
Total Items: Multiple prime searching programs written in different programming languages, stored on an 8GB flash drive as multiple files
Input: Above flash drive
Setting: Fine
Output: One 8GB flash drive containing one executable file and its source code file. A test PC was set up and the executable output was ran on it. On execution, the program outputted multiple billion prime numbers, entirely filling up the test PCs 16GB memory. Within seconds, this caused the Operating System of the PC to crash. Output was found to be a non-anomalous program written in C, and wiped without issue.
Test 914-1896
Name: Researcher Vivic
Date: 22/02/2022
Total Items: One Rubik's cube, 10g of red arcane chalk used in thaumaturgic rituals
Input: Aforementioned items
Setting: Fine
Output: One all red-sided Rubik's cube. When held by any individual they are able to perform telepathic abilities on the item, disassembling it into an "exploded diagram" and moving the sides around much like a normal Rubik's cube. Any attempts to move or rotate the sides of the cube with physical force via hands-on or robotics is impossible.
Test 914-1897
Name: Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku
Date: 22/02/2022
Total Items: Six small wax candles in the shape of the Arabic numeral 2, intended for use on birthday cakes
Note: Today is finally the "Twosday" everyone's talking about. - Belopaku
Input: One candle
Setting: 1:1
Output: A candle in the shape of the Roman numeral II.
Input: One candle
Setting: 1:1
Output: Two smaller candles in the shape of the Arabic numeral 1.
Input: One candle
Setting: Fine
Output: A candle in the shape of a flat rectangular plate, with the calendar for February 2022 engraved into one side.
Input: One candle
Setting: Fine
Output: An identical candle, with the anomalous property of always being perceived as two identical candles side by side.
Input: One candle
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A small solid hemispherical object made of wax. A human subject touching the surface of the object will cause their voice to change to an unidentified deep masculine tone whenever said subject attempts to vocalize the word "two". This effect can be removed via amnestic treatment.
Input: One candle
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One small wax phonograph cylinder. Despite being too small to be played by any known phonograph device, visual inspection has revealed that the recording contains the word "two" being repeated 128 times quickly in Researcher Belopaku's voice, interspersed with short pauses in which he appears to be catching his breath. The significance of this is unknown.
Test 914-1898
Name: Researcher Yuyuni Belopaku
Date: 23/02/2022
Total Items: Eight plastic figurines depicting characters from the webcomic Key Lime Pie.
Input: One plastic figurine of Nathan
Setting: Fine
Output: A miniature plastic model of Nathan's casreel, an iconic weapon from the webcomic.
Input: One plastic figurine of Nathan
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A small plastic disk with radial engravings dividing it into 8 sectors. Human subjects visually observing the object report a heightened urge to rub their face against the nearest wall.
Input: One plastic figurine of Kiwi
Setting: Fine
Output: A visually similar figurine, but with much more detail. Despite keeping the stylized appearance, each strand of hair is individually depicted and no manufacturing imperfections are visible. Furthermore, visually observing the object will cause human subjects to hallucinate the scent of various fruits.
Input: One plastic figurine of Kiwi
Setting: Very Fine
Output: An animate figurine of Kiwi, holding what appears to be a miniature Glock 19 handgun. The object is capable of firing small plastic "bullets" which are capable of penetrating human skin. Upon opening the output booth, the figurine autonomously exited the booth and began to shoot its gun in arbitrary directions while making various 'angry' poses.
Input: One plastic figurine of Plinky Gumn
Setting: Fine
Output: A figurine of Pac-Man from the eponymous video game franchise.
Input: One plastic figurine of Plinky Gumn
Setting: Very Fine
Output: A plastic model of what appears to be a single large popcorn kernel. Human subjects visually observing the object report a strong urge to utter the word "corn". Subjects who have not uttered the word "corn" within approximately 5 hours after visually observing the object will suddenly materialize an entire corncob within their stomach.
Input: One plastic figurine of Adrian
Setting: Fine
Output: A narrow cylindrical rod similar in appearance to a magician's wand. Shaking the object in a certain direction while holding one end will cause the other end to emit various extremely hot colorful sparks from an unknown source.
Input: One plastic figurine of Adrian
Setting: Very Fine
Output: [DATA LOST]
Note: At 14:55, 22/02/2022, the above testing log was appended to this document, and the seven outputs mentioned in said log simultaneously materialized in storage. No personnel within Site-19 Facility 23 has reported any recollection of the events described in the log. Furthermore, it has been determined that no such webcomic named Key Lime Pie featuring the characters mentioned above exists, and that there is no record of such a webcomic ever existing. - Security Chief Sedna
Test 914-1899
Name: Junior Researcher Liz Hammond
Date: 24/02/2022
Total Items: Seven small teddy bears with polyester filling, seven stainless steel fruit knives
Note: Hello, I'm new here. - Hammond
Input: One teddy bear, one knife
Setting: 1:1
Output: A stuffed bunny and a small pair of scissors
Input: One teddy bear, one knife
Setting: 1:1
Output: One small solid polyester knife with a cotton-covered handle, and a small plastic and metal model of a stylized bear similar in appearance to the teddy bear
Input: One teddy bear, one knife
Setting: 1:1
Output: A teddy bear with a stainless steel blade in place of its head, and the head of a teddy bear attached to a knife handle
Input: One teddy bear, one knife
Setting: Fine
Output: An identical teddy bear, with the contents of its tag replaced with the words "SUPER SECRIT WEPON"(sic). Scanning has revealed that the object contains three small serrated blades inside, pointing toward the front of the bear. The base of the blades have been firmly attached to the back side of the object.
Input: One teddy bear, one knife
Setting: Fine
Output: A different teddy bear with a stainless steel blade protruding from its bottom. The words "hello i am bear knife, cut things with me" has been stitched onto the back of the object. No anomalous properties have been observed.
Input: One teddy bear, one knife
Setting: Very Fine
Output: An animate stuffed puppy, holding a visually unchanged fruit knife. The object slowly walked towards D-47128 while emitting a loud "barking" sound upon the opening of the output booth, and was promptly contained by security guards.
Input: One teddy bear, one knife
Setting: Very Fine
Output: An animate teddy bear holding two small knives in each hand, emitting a loud scream while on fire. Object ceased all movement after approximately 6 minutes.
Cite this page as:
"Experiment Log 914" by Dr Gears, from the SCP Wiki. Source: https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/experiment-log-914. Licensed under CC-BY-SA.
For more information, see Licensing Guide.
Licensing Disclosures
For more information about on-wiki content, visit the Licensing Master List.