Dr. Apricus' Quote-Unquote "Author" Page

the One and Only

To see more of my works, check out the page you are literally looking at right now.

You have been granted special clearance to access the following file for your reading eyes only. By the authority of the Internal Arbitration Bureau, this file is 4/8350 classified.

SCP-8350 Public Affairs
+61 (Latest Post)

Commentary

Hey, y'all! After surviving a year-long writing desert, I'm back with this. Whether you hate it or love it, I'm pretty damn happy with how it turned out. This is, by far, my longest article yet — not too sure what happened there — but it's certainly my best work (according to me, an unbiased source). For clarity, I know that on the surface, this article is a bit goofy and bordering on lolFoundation, but it also serves as an analogy for my own experiences with struggling socially and having a spontaneous outward impression arbitrarily influence people's perception of you. If you want more information about that, you can check out the article's discussion thread.

— Bob Humanman, Director of the Public Affairs Department

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autistic

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A visual representation of the ray of sunshine¹ that I am.

I'm DrApricus², and I'm a quote-unquote "author" here on the SCP Wiki. I'm known for such renowned works as the wall that you run into and that one unfunny joke. I also contributed to the complete and total eradication of France and beat Dead Ahead on Hard Mode in Hotline Miami 2. Needless to say, I'm pretty frickin' awesome.

Occasionally, I'll write some garbage that people like (or maybe you're one of the many people who hate it) and post it here on the Wiki, but a lot of times, I like to read other people's works and help new and aspiring authors get acclimated to the site. I am ALWAYS³ available to give you any advice, show you around, and help you get your first article up on the site. I do both idea critique and draft critique, but I especially prefer looking at ideas and hearing elevator pitches.

As far as my preferences on what I prefer to critique go, while I'm willing to critique virtually anything, my specialties are astronomical⁴ concepts, detailed paranormal science, musical anomalies, character development pieces, heavy dialogue, internal Foundation affairs, bureaucratic mumbo jumbo, comedy⁵, philosophical topics, and anything related to dogs (strictly excluding animal cruelty). My aversions are the typical icky stuff, such as sexual abuse and rape, child abuse, violent hate crimes⁶, self-harm, gratuitous sexual content or violence, and, as aforementioned, animal cruelty. I do make exceptions, such as with heavily critical social commentary, but generally speaking, avoid coming to me with elevator pitches and drafts that focus a lot on those topics.

If you want to reach out to me for any reason, be it you want me to look at something, or you're interested in a collaboration, the two best methods are through Wikidot PMs and the official SCP Discord, with the latter being the quickest way to get a response from me. As I said earlier, you are always welcome to contact me; my door is always open. Importantly, note that if I come across as awkward or caustic, that is not your doing in any regard⁷, that is all me. If I don't get back to you within 24 hours, start annoying me, and if I don't get back to you within 72 hours, assume I'm either on hiatus or dead.

Now, onto the fun part: here are my Top 5 articles that I am most proud of⁸, in order of how proud of them I am.

SCP-8350 Public Affairs
+61
"You ask ten doctors what's wrong with a patient, there is going to be at least one dissenter. […] If we bend world leaders to our side and make the world population doubt their own senses and reasoning, our sole, uncontested narrative will effectively become truth."

Public Affairs is tasked with controlling the media and global narrative to serve the interests of the Foundation, but the department is long overdue for an upgrade. Meanwhile, containing an unruly species of shapeshifters and deceivers proves to be a difficult puzzle for the Polymorphs Department. After a crucial secret is revealed, Site-322 may just have the solution to both issues in this lighthearted, comedic episode of the Integration Program.

SCP-7099 A-Net: Radio Made Fun!™
Collaboration with Voiiiii
+62
"Ryan Seacrest was quickly taken into Foundation custody following the events of the previous addendum. Personnel believed doing so would cause SCP-7099-A to be absent or for the broadcast to be delayed."

In this day and age where everyone has their own podcast, and anyone can access an infinite stream of short-form content from a box in their hand, some might claim that the medium of radio is dead. Of course, they haven't heard of A-Net Radio, the titular eccentric radio station in this supernatural psych horror.

SCP-7421 Wartrod Hanging
+41
"…one of the condemned left hanging from SCP-7421, an unidentified male with a severely injured face, was still breathing. Later investigation found he had been hanging for 58 years as of 1914."

The Wild West is known in film and television cliches for its wide desert landscapes, arid mountainous scenery, beautiful accompanying scores, and Clint Eastwood smoking an inexpensive cigar. But there exists a much more sinister side to the history of the Wild West, with violent injustices that are continuing to resurface in our society today. Whether or not there is a heaven and hell, the victims in this gruesome body horror pray there is.

SCP-6725 Mind-Blowing Wall Art
+85
"Contact with the task force is lost after authorization to shoot to kill is granted to the operatives. CCTV shows the task force dropping their rifles and charging into the fire."

Postmodern art: when the rejection of Enlightenment breeds abstraction and confusion and where it seems meaning goes to die. Nevertheless, it utterly captivates the world. In this absurdist piece, "meaning" is people, and "captivates" has a fluid definition, but rest assured you will be and stay captivated. Wile E. Coyote, meet Road Runner.

SCP-6264 Temperature Tantrum
Collaboration with LAN 2D
+42
"…an anonymous tip was received by the Foundation Complaints Office, accusing SCP-6264-G of abusing his position's power within the Foundation hierarchy, corruption, embezzlement, and, most notably, impersonation of Foundation personnel."

Office disputes are nothing new — they're as old as corporations themselves. But these disputes carry heavier risks when that office is responsible for containing anomalies and phenomena where any slip-up could cause someone to croak. When two fine-as-frog-hair employees begin butting heads, the higher-ups learn that resolving the conflict in this abstract comedy is like herding frogs.

And now for an honorable mention!

SCP-7779 LE POOF!
Collaboration with Aftokrator, Fish^12, and Jack Waltz
+193
"France's sudden disappearance generated a massive vacuum, causing air and seawater to rush into the vacant space. The explosion generated in these vacuums led to strong winds blowing across western Europe."

I was sitting in my European History class one day when I thought to myself, "Hey, what if France just vanished?" Apparently, this was a very popular question and several months later, my co-authors hopped on board to bring this absurd geopolitical piece to fruition. Inspired by the Broken Masquerade canon, sit and watch as the disappearance of the country of France almost ends the world. Note: This SCP is not meant to display hate towards or prejudice against French people.

Finally, here's a comprehensive list of all my standing works.

SCP	Rating	Comments	Created	Last Comment	Length
SCP-5400-J	305	38	30 Jul 2022 02:11	27 Mar 2025 07:06	1247
SCP-7779	193	44	18 Sep 2022 05:37	30 Jul 2024 06:53	9392
SCP-6725	85	14	19 Aug 2022 07:45	30 Aug 2022 16:40	7401
SCP-7099	62	24	13 Sep 2022 12:35	06 Mar 2023 08:31	36147
SCP-8350	61	12	15 Apr 2024 09:58	05 Nov 2024 15:02	61648
Critter Profile: Tangerine!	43	11	24 Sep 2022 21:52	13 Mar 2025 14:44	14578
SCP-7201	43	13	10 Sep 2022 00:14	24 Mar 2023 13:30	9553
SCP-6264	42	13	25 Aug 2022 18:27	28 Sep 2022 11:41	21371
SCP-7421	41	7	28 May 2023 22:29	19 Jun 2023 12:47	10405
SCP-661-J	34	12	30 Sep 2022 06:50	11 Mar 2025 15:25	3335
SCP-6351	33	7	29 Aug 2022 17:19	22 Oct 2022 03:49	4151
SCP-7036	30	10	22 Sep 2022 03:17	01 Aug 2023 15:57	4902
SCP-6249	23	3	26 Jul 2022 15:27	27 Jul 2022 04:20	19033
SCP-4072	22	6	16 Oct 2022 19:43	19 Oct 2022 23:49	23971
Dr. Apricus' Quote-Unquote "Author" Page	21	6	17 Apr 2024 12:05	19 Apr 2024 13:06	18086
SCP-6604	21	4	15 May 2022 20:17	25 Jan 2024 22:50	17977

If I cannot be contacted for over a year for any reason and without prior notice, all my published works are to be indefinitely relinquished (until my return) to the community and made available for rewrite without my consultation should they meet all other existing criteria. In such a scenario, I urge Wiki staff to take the measures they deem fit to resolve any issues that may arise concerning my articles, such as licensing problems, again without my consultation. In this scenario, I would retain all original authorship credit under Creative Commons. This shouldn't ever be a concern, but better safe than sorry.

+ WHAT'S NEXT?

For a while now, I've felt like I have gotten far too comfortable with my writing here on the Wiki. I feel as if I have found what I am really good least bad at and, intentionally or not, stuck to that. For me to grow as a writer, I need to be willing to leave my comfort zone, build worlds, commit to those worlds and their characters, and continue to make my latest my best. While I will still be writing other content because I can do whatever the hell I want, for the next year or longer, I will be working in the background on a project I have been letting ferment in my head for a while now…

SHIELDS AKIMBO

…aka, my obsession with cool sci-fi AI shit come to life. This will be a four-part series, each "episode" being fairly lengthy and devoted to a product of "Shields Akimbo," a covert project by an especially cold Foundation that aims to protect the collective human population of the Earths through our many parallel universes from the paranormal and supernatural. Each episode will be written so as to intertwine together to create an overarching story, but my hope is that they will still be able to suffice as standalone reads.

I aim to have the first episode published by the end of this year, though I'm unsure how realistic that goal is. But anyway, below are a few little teasers I made while procrastinating on my actual responsibilities.

‡ Licensing / Citation

Cite this page as:

"Dr. Apricus' Quote-Unquote "Author" Page" by DrApricus, from the SCP Wiki. Source: https://scpwiki.com/drapricus-author-page. Licensed under CC-BY-SA.

For information on how to use this component, see the License Box component. To read about licensing policy, see the Licensing Guide.

Filename: Beauty_of_Sunshine.jpg
Author: Charles R. Benedict
License: CC BY-SA 4.0
Source: Wikimedia Commons

Filename: palogo.png
Author: DrApricus
License: CC BY-SA 4.0
Source: SCP-8350

Filename: dude.jpg
Author: DrApricus
License: CC BY-SA 4.0
Source: SCP-8350

Filename: Hubble_mystery.jpg
Author: European Space Agency
License: CC BY-SA 2.0
Source: Flickr

Filename: Surveillance.jpg
Author: Yeong-Nam
License: CC BY-SA 2.0
Source: Flickr

Filename: Surreal_Name.jpg
Author: CornWall-16
License: CC BY-SA 2.0
Source: Flickr

Filename: cyborg.jpg
Author: liladepo
License: CC BY-SA 2.0
Source: Flickr

Footnotes

1. Fun fact: my alias on the Wiki, "Apricus," is Latin for sunshine.

2. Apricus, DrApricot, Apricot, Apri, and whatever sick and twisted nicknames you can come up with are all acceptable stand-ins.

3. I do occasionally take brief, unannounced, intermittent breaks from the Wiki. That is the only circumstance in which I am unavailable.

4. This can range from cosmic horror to physics-heavy space stuff to lighthearted extraterrestrial species of crabs.

5. It is important to note that I am NOT funny whatsoever.

6. This means violent acts perpetrated because of racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, religious discrimination, etc.

7. Unless I explicitly say otherwise, and I will! I am not subtle.

8. Total rating does not equate to how proud I am of a published work of mine.