ALRIGHT FUCKERS I HOPE Y'ALL READY
CUZ WE ABOUT TO GO FULL HAM
UP
IN
THIS
BINCH
Hey yo, it's ya boi Fullham. You can also call me Full-of-it, Hammy, DJ Hamhands, Hamsterdance…..call me whatever as long as it's not ████████ lmao 🤣💯 💦
THIS ME
Name: Mike
Pronouns: He/him/his preferred, they/them are accepted as well.
Age: 36 (YES I AM OLD)
Location: Minnesota, USA, the place where we constantly complain about the weather but are weirdly stubbornly proud of putting up with it.
Interests: Video games, weird paranormal shit (fucking DUH), reading sci-fi and high fantasy, writing (also DUH), biking, and swimming during the six weeks a year it's warm enough for it here. I also stream games on Twitch.
THIS IS SHIT PEOPLE SAY ABOUT ME
Quikngruvn said "Ooooh, I see, Fullham. That both makes more sense and less sense."
JakdragonX said "The ham, the homeslice, the delectable legend."
Hexick said "You're so cool everyone wants you at Sunday dinner."
MalyceGraves said "A heart o' gold with a fine set of pipes."
Calibold said "Full is an 8/10 person. Doesn't smell awful, wears glasses, but isn't a wizard."
Tropinano said "One time I walked into the site19 and there stood Fullham in the biggest fucking hat you've ever seen. I was in shock and said 'where did you get that hat' but was quickly hushed as DrFullham stared at me, looked around hastily and vanished."
Proasek said "The more I read from Fullham the more I want die."
cybersqyd said "Doctor Fullham is, despite my strongest protests, an author."
WhiteGuard said "DrFullham: I would hate and love you at the same time for that."
Sonderance said "DrFullham hastened my descent into weebdom, and for that he will never be forgiven. He also gives pretty good crit."
Marceline_Raynes said "You make me regret learning how to read sometimes."
ghosteater said "I'm gonna fuckin headbutt you."
The_Spider_Queen said "Fullham is definitely a ham. Not a very good one, but at least edible."
HarryBlank said "I didn't know you can get an authorpage by titling other people's stuff."
Cyvstvi13 does not match any existing user name said "You're alright."
Oboebandgeek99 said "I get sea captain vibes from you. Or like, mad sea captain crossed with eldritch horror. But like a nice eldritch horror."
DrKens said "DrFullham is a raccoon slut, like me."
ThatDudeOverThere said "imma quote you in the future."
HarryBlank said "Getting beaten to a pun by Fullham is like getting beaten to launching a satellite by the Moon."
BattleblockB0ss said "DrFullham is exactly what he says: no more or less than a single entire ham. If nothing else can be said for him, he's honest."
Purplayoss said "menadrs a hav skav escoost?"
Angryman22 said "There's a quote for your author page, lmao"
Cydhra said "up up down down left right left right full ham"
This was my first ever SCP, and it took me ages to write. The earliest drafts were a sad ripoff of SCP-093 and people were quick to tell me such. After two years of editing and polishing, it was finally to a point where I felt comfortable posting it in the fall of 2018.
As of 21/06/2020, I have done a fairly major rewrite and shaved off about 1500 words thanks to the lovely
cybersqyd. Ve helped me trim the fat and cut out a lot of stuff that didn't really help the narrative, and for that ve has my eternal gratitude.
MalyceGraves's advice also prompted me to remove every single blackbox on the page.
Fun fact: The original title was "The Living Dimension", which I changed to "Knock Knock Knockin' on Fear's Door" after the rewrites in 2020. Then,
ghosteater on IRC gave me the current, much better title.
Appx. word count: 7650
What is and will probably remain my most emotional SCP. It's based on the fact that I really love my mom who is thankfully still with us. Wrote this in about two months after the first time I graced the IRC chats with my presence.
Appx. word count: 2000
My first entry for 144-hour Jamcon 2020, the theme was EXPLOSIONS. I stared at my signed photo of Mr. Torgue for inspiration as I wrote it. It's both my shortest SCP and the shortest time I've spent writing an SCP, 6-8 hours total. And since you foolish fools foolishy voted to keep it on the site, now this page exists.
I hope you all learn from your mistake.
Appx. word count: 500
144-hour Jamcon 2020 entry #2, theme was DELICIOUS. Credit to the "Deleted Wikipedia pages with freaky titles" page for giving me "Scrambled brains on toast" which inspired this grotesque horror.
Appx. word count: 1150
My pinch-hit entry for the 2020 Exquisite Corpse contest. I had a lot of fun writing this, even if I was in a blind panic for much of the roughly 48 hours I had to write it. Thanks
FoodAndBeverage for providing the containment procedures!
Appx. word count: 1400
Been working on this one since December of 2019 and there is no reason it should have taken me that long. Inspired by the photo, which was actually an r/SCP fuel post.
Appx. word count: 2650
This was an idea that randomly popped into my head when I discovered there wasn't an SCP with this title yet. It started out with an idea for a heartwarming yet slightly bittersweet tale of a man who longed to revisit the snowy Christmases of his youth. It was meant to be a sort of "be careful what you wish for" kind of story, with a sprinkling of "you can't go back to the way things were." Instead, I was struck with a completely different idea when I was writing, and it became this.
As of January 6th, 2023, this became my first ever SCP to reach or exceed a +100 rating.
Appx. word count: 650
JJJ-JJJJ-J: "JIt's Ja Joke" (+243)
Joriginal Jost Jate: January Jwenty-jeventh, jwo-jhousand jand jwenty-jhree
Jhis jis ja jerrible joke JJJ jhat jI jrote jin jabout jan jour jafter jIRC jhat jembers jold je jit jas junny. JI jake jo jesponsiblity jor jhis.
Jppx. jord jount: Jwo jundred jand jifteen
My contribution to the Team With No Name's Aces and Eights entries for Canon Renaissance Contest. This was a blast to write and I'm happy my first ever tale on the wiki was pretty well received!
Appx. word count: 650
My entry to the CupidCon 2021 contest. I waited until the last day of the contest because I was just not feeling inspired, but then reading the other entries got me all fired up and I basically didn't sleep the night I wrote this. I had a blast and it was received better than I ever imagined.
Appx. word count: 1600
A short, personal vent piece about the mundanity of quarantine mixing with depression, and the need for something, anything exciting to happen.
Appx. word count: 350
A short-ish tale about the dangers of messing with the flow of time. My contribution for the Department of Prescience for Deptcon 2022.
Appx. word count: 820
I had this lovely image of SCP-3608 impromptu-drawn for me by the amazing
Skorpt!!! I appreciate it so much and love how well they got across a complex idea in such a straightforward image! You can find her art page here!
Artist
Aethris also drew this incredible GIF of 4836, again, without me even asking! The artists here are so heckin' great and generous! You can find her art page here!
I commissioned this lovely pic of an epilogue scene of my two lovey dovey boys Richie and Mitchy from
ghosteater and he did a fantastic job! You can find his art page here!
Robyrne also did this amazing drawing of Ritchie and Mitchy - I like to imagine this as the first time they met. You can find his tumblr here!!!
These are articles that other very talented people wrote that I provided the titles for:
SCP-5270: "Press 'X' To Bear" (+289) by GerrymanderBassist
SCP-5450: "Fintastic Soup" (+34) by HunterDog
SCP-5785: "Craptivism" (+129) by Deadly Bread and
Sonderance
SCP-6070: "Nuclear Energy is the Future" (+104) by Cydhra
SCP-6524: "A God-Awful Small Affair" (+108) by BlueJones
SCP-6546: "Renal Riches" (+74) by Rab333
SCP-6919: "The Insistence of Memory" (+57) by Agisuru
SCP-7398: "Cabbybara" (+63) by Angryman22
SCP-7886: "Halcyon Days, Arabian Nights" (+105) by RadiantGold
SCP-7919: "Terror-toma" (+105) by Cydhra
SCP-7928: "THREAT LEVEL: NULL" (+123) by Everturning
Do Androids Dream of Sanctuary?: (+36) by BlueJones
If the title wasn't obvious enough for you shrieking plebs, these are recordings of Your Royal Hamness reading various SCPs and tales.
Due to changes in the file size rules, I have started a YouTube channel for my readings.
SCP-3929: "boner pill by dado" by djkaktus
SCP-5053: "Anything but a stick in the mud" by Marceline_Raynes
SCP-5608: "The Delectable Taste of Cognition" by me, Doctor Fullham
SCP-5798: "Interview with the Drain Snake" by J Dune
SCP-5990: "Out of my head, out of my mind" by Lt Flops
SCP-6292: "Don't Beer the Reaper" by JakdragonX and
Ralliston
SCP-6791: "The Protagonist" by LittleFieryOne
SCP-6919: "The Insistence of Memory" by Agisuru
JJJ-JJJJ-J: "JIt's ja joke" by Doctor Fullham
"Back to Your Irregularly Scheduled Programming" by Kensing
Name: Dr. Henry James Alexander Fullham
Gender/Sex: Male/Male
Featured in:
SCP-5018: "The Broken Rose", both a name mention and the voice of Director Bold.
SCP-6661: "Problem?", as the researcher in the audio log.
The Vikander-Kneed Technical Media Hub, as the welcome voice.
SCP-7419: "Marianne Simmons Will Buy A Bagel At Wynnsbury's", as the voice of the device.
SCP-7783: "SPHERE", as the voice of Junior Researcher Winston Middelberg.

A CC-Compliant candid image of the Doctor himself.
Image by BattleBl0ckBoss
Cite this page as:
"Doctor Fullham" by Doctor Fullham, from the SCP Wiki. Source: https://scpwiki.com/doctor-fullham. Licensed under CC-BY-SA.
For information on how to use this component, see the License Box component. To read about licensing policy, see the Licensing Guide.
Filename: Happy Doctor
Author: Lisa Brewster
License: Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-SA 2.0)
Source Link: https://www.flickr.com/photos/9031691@N08/2670224692
Filename: rosemary & marmalade glazed ham
Author: jules
License: Attribution 2.0 Generic (CC BY 2.0)
Source Link: https://www.flickr.com/photos/58367355@N00/5165547210