Apparently I get to make one of these now.
Overview: Existential imagery, dumb jokes, few redactions, and ███████1 These are all hallmarks of my stuff, but I'm still expanding my scope. Semi-active on IRC and the forums.
Hit: Dumb humor, absurdism when done well, techno that isn't dubstep, Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff2, existential horror, Advance Wars 2 (where I shamelessly stole this format from), chess (feel free to shoot me a PM if you have any questions on competitive or speed chess), parkour (even if I'm not terribly good at it).
Miss: I guess they never miss, huh?
In chronological order, my contributions to the site are as follows:
SCP-4903: Eternity, Served Cold. My first contribution, and the least deadly thing the Foundation has ever found.
SCP-3034-J: Voresnake. Yeah, uh, we don't talk about this one. Moving on.
SCP-939-J: Crime Time Canine. A talking dog that solves mysteries.
SCP-4312: Drift Into the Sky. Gravity randomly reverses and screws some poor soul a couple times each month with no warning.
SCP-4272: The Proper Way to Appreciate Art. Steal it, film it, eat it, post it.
More to come!
Check out a half dozen unfinished/unstarted works in my sandbox!