Dr. Cimmerian Hits Reply All
rating: +173+x
From: overwatch.command@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff
Subject: Happy Holidays!

Happy holidays to you and ours on behalf of everyone on the O5 Command.

May your festivities be joyful and your new year full of mirth.


Secure, Contain, Protect

From: jcimmerian@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

This email is a waste of productivity and time. This is the Foundation, not a small business. We can't afford to be wasting time on trivial pleasantries. I heavily suggest not sending another email of this nature in the future. If you insist on sending such frivolous material in the future, please remove me from the send list. Thanks in advance.

Regards,

Jeremiah Cimmerian


Ethics Committee Representative
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From: k.p.crow@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

It appears you have hit 'Reply All' instead of 'Reply'. Please be mindful of this in the future, Doctor Cimmerian.

Cheers,
Professor Kain Pathos Crow


R&D Department
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From: c.o.gears@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

Salutations,

Please remove me from this chain email.

Thanks,

C. Gears


Site-17 Director
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From: jeverwood@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

Hello,

With all due respect, Director Gears, this whole situation could be avoided if folx just stopped hitting 'Reply All'. I know I am part of the problem by doing so myself, but I feel I am justified in providing a solution.

Have a wonderful day,
J. Everwood


GoI-466 Specialist
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From: rbarnard@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:¡Felices fiestas!

Entendí el primer mensaje de esta cadena de correo electrónico, pero no entiendo el resto porque están en inglés. ¿Puedo ser eliminado de esta cadena de correo electrónico, o puede alguien traducir para mí y el otro personal de habla hispana?

Gracias,
Richard Barnard


Director del Sitio 34
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From: hcole@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

Oh great, it looks like this message really went through to everyone employed by the Foundation. I'm going to turn off my computer before the flood of confused non-English speakers come in.


GoI 563 Research Lead
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From: arose@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

Please stop pressing Reply All. There are thousands of people employed by the Foundation, and each use of Reply All is increasing the amount of unique emails sent by several thousand. If we continue at this rate the SCiPnet servers will crash.

Alexis Rose


RAISA
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From: yleiner@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

Hello,

Thank you for the consideration, but I am Jewish. Also, please remove me from this chain email.

Y. Leiner


Tactical Theology Department, Abrahamic Sub-Department Lead
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From: aclef@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

WHAT PART OF STOP HITTING REPLY ALL DO YOU IDIOTS NOT UNDERSTAND

Cheers,
A. Clef


Applied Force Department Lead
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From: jcimmerian@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

I didn't hit Reply All, I only hit Reply to overwatch.command@scp.int.
Something is clearly wrong with the email system.

Regards,

Jeremiah Cimmerian


Ethics Committee Representative
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From: kinada@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

Oh, sure you didn't, Cimmerian. Just like you totally didn't put cheese labels in the bathroom or microwave cheese in the break room.


Ethics Committee Representative
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From: jcimmerian@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

You're wrong about me hitting Reply All.

Regards,

Jeremiah Cimmerian


Ethics Committee Representative
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From: c.o.gears@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

Salutations,

Again, please remove me from this chain email.

Thanks,

C. Gears


Site-17 Director
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From: arose@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

Attention,

The SCiPNET servers are dangerously close to being overloaded with emails. Over 650,000,000 emails have been created during this back and forth. If you get an email, please do not hit Reply All! Please ignore them and return to work.

If we don't stop now the servers will crash.

Please, I am begging you.

Alexis Rose


RAISA
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From: jcimmerian@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

I'm telling you people, I just keep hitting Reply, not Reply All.

Regards,

Jeremiah Cimmerian


Ethics Committee Representative
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From: aclef@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

THEN EXPLAIN WHY WE ALL KEEP GETTING EMAILS, YOU POTATO HEADED FUCK

Cheers,
A. Clef


Applied Force Department Lead
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From: k.p.crow@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

Alto,

Please remember to stay civil. It is unbecoming of someone in a position of authority to be obscene.

Cheers,
Professor Kain Pathos Crow


R&D Department
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From: jeverwood@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

I just got back from lunch; we're still dealing with this? It's simple; just stop hitting reply all.

Have a wonderful day,

J. Everwood


GoI-466 Specialist
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From: jworth@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

thanks 4 taking the time to acknowldge the little people who keep the foundation running :)


Site-19 Janitorial Lead
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From: jcimmerian@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff, overwatch.command@scp.int
Subject: RE:Happy Holidays!

  • acknowledge

You're welcome.

Regards,

Jeremiah Cimmerian


Ethics Committee Representative
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ERROR

SCiPnet SERVERS OVERLOADED

PLEASE TRY AGAIN LATER.






























From: arose@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff
Subject: SCiPnet Updates

Hello,

Due to recent events, RAISA has decided to disable the 'Reply All' feature on SCiPnet's internal email client for everyone except Site Directors and other personnel with similar clearance level.

The SCiPnet servers have also recently received an upgrade in the form of three additional servers to ensure the likelihood of outages is diminished.

Thank you for your cooperation.

-Alexis Rose


RAISA
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From: c.o.gears@scp.int
To: Everyone-Staff
Subject: RE:SCiPnet Updates

Salutations,

Please remove me from this chain email.

Thanks,

C. Gears


Site-17 Director
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