Capitalize Key Broken (L-47432)
rating: +38+x

(EST. 1835)

Insubordination-Related Layoff

Northeastern Florida Pharmaceutical Research1


February 29th, 1912

Former Factory Pharmaceutical Engineer David Donoghue2

Elder Forewoman Clara Callaghan3


Worker Repairman James Freud4
Security Officer Nero McGonagall5
Security Officer Deborah Angelino6

Workers in need of James Freud's repair services

In his tenure as pharmaceutical engineer, David Donoghue had the following demerits against his record:

  • Requesting a luxury service wherein Modesty Textiles7 could be regularly serviced with the application of water and various soaps, in spite of the ban on employee benefit requests;
  • Requesting a luxury service in which employees would gain access to sunlight;
  • A history of preparing novel iterations of prototype pharmaceutical products without preparing the standard documentation or seeking Foreman approval;
  • An informality in his speech and actions towards Elder Forewoman Clara Callaghan.8

The Factory had recently deployed Prototype Product 37491542 to the closest Worker Repairman Station. Prototype Product 37491542 is intended to transmute unrepaired workers into raw information, in which state they can be fixed and converted back into matter. Recent research into the machine's operations has suggested it may have the ability to manipulate how various concept clusters interact with the being who is being repaired. Some clusters, but not all, are based in the multiple meanings a word can have.


After being informed of the termination of his employment, Mr. Donoghue attempted to use Prototype Product 37491542 on himself. This misuse of company resources damaged both Prototype Product 37491542 and Mr. Donoghue, resulting in The Factory severing ties completely with Mr. Donoghue.


During Mr. Donoghue's semi-weekly performance evaluation, Elder Forewoman Clara Callaghan informed him that due to the previously mentioned infractions, The Factory would have to terminate his employment.9

Actor Action Factory Response

Mr. Donoghue asks for an irrelevant clarification.10

The Elder Forewoman patiently clarifies and leaves the room.11
Mr. Donoghue voluntarily activates his tear ducts.12 Worker Repairman James Freud walks into Mr. Donoghue's cubicle, informing him of a relatively minor discovery on the use of Prototype Product 37491542.13

Mr. Donoghue demonstrates the use of a new model duct tape for Mr. Freud, and greets him warmly.14

Mr. Freud returns Mr. Donoghue's greeting, but declines to handshake, citing a sudden decrease in limb mobility.15
Mr. Donoghue expresses his condolences for the loss of mobility and leaves the cubicle, stating he can train himself on the use of Prototype Product 37491542. Mr. Freud attempts to resume talks with Mr. Donoghue, but is unsuccessful due to the aforementioned mobility issue.16
Mr. Donoghue enters Mr. Freud's station and begins assembling a complex mechanism to automatically trigger the Prototype Product while he is in its Modification chamber.17 Mr. Freud tries to greet passers-by, or anyone within hearing range, of his current location and lack of mobility, to no avail. Kudos to others in the area, on managing to focus on their own jobs rather than getting distracted!
Mr. Donoghue bids farewell to the hamster in the wheel which powers his mechanism, causing it to start to run, as he steps into the Modification chamber. Security Officers Nero McGonagall and Deborah Angelino arrive at Mr. Freud's location to reprimand him for frivolous use of breath. They cut him loose, not before marking it as a demerit on his account.
The machine continues operating somewhat imperfectly. Mr. Donoghue is converted into pure information. An angular stress of 11 kN/m2 is applied to the Capitalize key by the hastily rigged trigger mechanism, causing it to deform and break.

Security Officers alert Elder Forewoman Clara Callaghan to Mr. Donoghue's misuse of Factory resources.

david donoghue18 rematerializes, showing signs of a muddled vocabulary and an inability to communicate in capital letters.19 Elder Forewoman Clara Callaghan enters the Worker Repairman station and comprehends the situation.20 The Elder Forewoman sends the Security Officers and the Worker Repairman back to work while she escorts david donoghue into custody.21

As a result of the aforementioned insubordination, Elder Forewoman Clara Callaghan argued successfully to the Board of Directors that the Factory should cut all ties to mr. donoghue. The Elder Forewoman reasoned that since mr. donoghue's attempt to use the capitalization key had backfired, causing the concept of capitalization to be separated from him, any attempt by the Factory to use him for any purpose would end up losing the Factory money. Mr. Freud received another demerit for objecting to this decision.22
The broken Prototype Product was dissolved into its component parts. A replacement is expected sometime in August. Workers are reminded to not let themselves become broken until then.
The Factory is currently hiring for the position of Pharmaceutical Engineer. Recruitment drives are active.
mr. donoghue objected to his removal from the Factory, in word and in bodily action, from the moment the decision was rendered to his being deposited outside facility walls.23

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