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SCP-3305: The Father, The Son, And The Holy Toast
When they pass around the crackers during communion, they aren't kidding when they say that's the body of Christ.
This SCP is dedicated to Taylor and Joy, who helped me get this stupid, stupid picture.
Author: Captain Kirby
SCPs
SCP Number | Rating |
---|---|
SCP-3393 | 844 |
Captain Kirby's Proposal | 532 |
SCP-4514 | 435 |
SCP-3448 | 429 |
SCP-5552 | 412 |
SCP-3388 | 392 |
SCP-5003 | 361 |
SCP-3305 | 352 |
SCP-3844 | 347 |
SCP-3866 | 327 |
SCP-4877 | 294 |
SCP-4321 | 286 |
SCP-3449 | 278 |
SCP-016-J | 191 |
SCP-3123 | 186 |
SCP-3511 | 179 |
SPC-1057 | 177 |
SCP-4925 | 155 |
SCP-3633 | 152 |
SCP-3767 | 150 |
SCP-3393-EX | 140 |
SCP-4479 | 138 |
SCP-4775 | 128 |
SCP-4034 | 119 |
SCP-4316 | 118 |
SCP-3650 | 85 |
SCP-5877 | 70 |
SCP-5779 | 55 |
SCP-5448 | 53 |
SCP-3203 | 53 |
SCP-3405 | 44 |
SCP-3481 | 40 |
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SCP-3250 - Jesus Fried Chicken by minmin and
LilyFlower
Public knowledge of the substitution of Kentucky Fried Chicken's secret "Eleven Secret Herbs and Spices" recipe is to be suppressed.
SCP-3166 - You Have No Idea How Alone You Are, Garfield by Tanhony
The exterior layer of SCP-3166's body resembles a crudely-made costume of the character Garfield, which field inspection has shown to be composed of legitimate cat fur. However, analysis of SCP-3166's composition in the field has shown that its interior mass is composed entirely out of pasta: specifically, lasagna.

Picture of SCP-3305 confiscated during Event SCP-3305-A
Item #: SCP-3305
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: MTF Gamma-84 (Holy Toasters) are to be permanently stationed at SCP-3305. All personnel attempting to gain access to SCP-3305 without prior approval are to be detained, administered Class-A amnestics, and released.
Should SCP-3305-1 manifest, it is to be detained by MTF Gamma-84 and transferred to Site-19, where it will be stored in a standard humanoid containment chamber. Protocol Judas is to be executed in the event of a containment breach meeting the required criteria.
Description: SCP-3305 is a collection of five trees in the ██████████ Forest with slices of white bread stapled to them. All attempts to remove the bread from the trees have failed.
If a particular ritual is performed at SCP-3305 (See Document SCP-3305-R), then a humanoid composed of bread will appear (SCP-3305-1). SCP-3305-1 will offer parts of itself to eat, and puncture itself to produce wine to drink. This bread and wine have restorative properties, as individuals who have consumed them report being cured of all physical and mental illnesses.
All individuals who consume part of SCP-3305-1 worship it, as well as bread in general. The form of this worship varies highly between individuals. Similarities between this effect and those observed in SCP-3250 and SCP-2867 are under investigation.
While amnestics can successfully erase memories of interaction with SCP-3305-1, subjects under SCP-3305-1’s effects still believe in the existence of SCP-3305-1, and will continue to worship bread. Only after SCP-3305-1 has been terminated do amnestics become effective at erasing all memories regarding SCP-3305-1.
Additional Documents: