SCP-3
rating: +36+x
Item#: 3
Level6
Containment Class:
esoteric
Secondary Class:
tiamat
Disruption Class:
amida
Risk Class:
critical


BY ORDER OF THE OVERSEER COUNCIL

The following file is Level 6/3 classified. Unauthorized access is forbidden.

Seriously, it's bad.1


Special Containment Procedures: Any attempts to fully contain SCP-3 would require the complete dissolution of the entire Foundation; thus, it must be allowed to propagate as it has since the inception2 of this organization.

Description: SCP-3 is the concept of the "Keter" object class. In truth, no such class exists, despite Foundation-wide acceptance of such.3

When you really think about it, "Keter" doesn't even make sense. Like, seriously. We in the O5 Council understand "Safe" - hey, you contain it and it doesn't do anything. We understand "Euclid" - oh no, it might try to escape or something.4

But Keter? Keter? If an anomaly keeps breaking containment, then, well… it's not Secure, it's not Contained, it's not Protected, is it?5?6

Honestly, we're baffled that no one has ever questioned this, but fortunately for us, it has served our interests quite well.

"Keter" has lead to more disagreements, arguments, and outright fist fights than any other Object Class - hell, it's the cause of more strife than pretty much anything else in the entire Foundation.7

You know why this is good? BECAUSE IT KEEPS THE SHEEP IN LINE. Without it, Foundation8members might actually stop and *think* about the implications of what they're doing; they might actually realize just how bizarre it is to collect random-ass anomalies like a game of "Mad Science Pok­émon." Not to mention the ethical implications of holding self-aware entities against their will!9

So, we keep the proles busy.10

As for ourselves? Well, we're sitting nice and cushy in this "Site" we have.11

Addendum: Oh, and we can't forget - watching people argue constantly about non-existent concepts is funny as fuck12.13

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